bone empress

dahlia•24

[harrowhark-nova]

got told i had a good pedigree during a bartending interview. like my love it’s just fine dining please don’t make it sound important

[zendayamybabe]

“source?” i’m an earth sign i just know 

[arienai]

"my fave did nothing wrong" oh yeah well MY fave fucked everything up and she's still my fave so

[patiencefarseer]

Good work everybody

[pomegranatefae]

Can we talk about how fucking insane Nona the Ninth must've been from Gideon's perspective?

Like, she spent all of the previous book trapped in a walled off portion of Harrow's subconscious and thinking that Harrow hated her bc she refused to properly eat her soul. Then in the last like thirty minutes of the book harrow's soul goes on holiday and Gideon's now in her body fighting fucked up bug things and she still thinks Harrow hates her but also she's going to do her best to keep Harrow's body safe but definitely not because she cares about Harrow, just because she's her cavalier and that's what she's meant to do.

Then offscreen she got resurrected by god—kinda sorta we'll find out I guess, pyrrah seems to know what's up but is not sharing with the class—who she learned five minutes ago is her dad and was going around doing her tower prince thing with ianthe tridentarius who I'm sure she had a very normal and not at all weird relationship with. Idk maybe they bonded over wanting to fuck Harrow (not that Gideon would ever admit that of course).

Then while Gideon's being all corpse-y in her off time, who does she see but Harrowhark fucking Nonagesimus. Who immediately kisses her. Gideon then learns that said body that she definitely has only very platonic feelings about, antagonistic feelings even, is being piloted by an autistic six month old. Whose one really good skill is reading people and who kissed her because the second Nona walked into the room she read her like a fucking book and saw that Gideon really wanted to kiss Harrow('s body).

Gideon proceeds to be very normal about desperately needing to know where Harrow actually is. Not because she's in love with Harrow obviously, that would be crazy, she needs to know so that she can, uh, point and laugh at whatever predicament Harrow's in, yeah that's it. Only to learn that Nona doesn't fucking know.

Then, at the end of the book, Gideon learns that Nona is actually the corpse that Harrow's had a crush on since she was a kid. And also said corpse wakes up and kisses/bites Harrow right in front of her.

[mgsr]

[runasulienadanika]

ah yes, my favourite tlt characters:

200 dead children

literally Joan of Arc

First Flower of the Ninth House, the Best Cavalier They have Ever produced, Their Triumph, the Best of Them All,

guy with the worst surname ever

[only-cat-memes]

[harrowhark-nova]

i think my brothers cat is bored he was scratching at my door and i let him in but im confused because he (the cat) and i dont really hang like that. and i pet him for a while but now hes just sitting on the floor and staring and meowing at me. and like its 230 am idk what he wants me to do here

[lisdens]

gideon the ninth // harrow the ninth // nona the ninth

[dorkhellbside]

cats love sleeping on or next to you and slowly bake you like an oven roast chicken

[loserforever]

oh you’re yanking my chain? yank harder

[free-my-mindd]

[diedoffscreen]

[mornington-the-crescent]

[vee-dmsr]

alectopause so bad it's got dumbasses making callout posts on the subreddit about pyrrha LMAOO????

[vee-dmsr]

we gotta kill this guy

[echo-has-queries]

via @chaos-has-theories

I wish I could incorporate "bestie he ate her" into my every day vocabulary. Fr, accusing tasmuir of not having thought through the implications is WILD. Like "What do you mean there are violations of consent in the Violations of Consent book?!?" Smack my gobs, good sir, it's almost like it's a THEME or something. There are definitely fascinating discussions to be had here, I suppose on that we can agree.

[probuccalfat]

my bad for the emotional and mental instability it’s just that i was the first one to get boobs in high school and it’s never been the same again. you understand

[maidthings]

i really like how the milkman exists as an entirely fossilized character who now serves no purpose other than to fuck people's wives for the punchline

[matimatti]

Imagine you're harrow in that ship and you are so so so confused with everything, you can never go back to your home which you have sacrificed everything for, one of the guys you are stuck on that ship with is trying to kill you like all the time, the only friend you have is the insane girl who ate her childhood friend, you are the loneliest you've ever been, you are still having hallucinating symptoms but without anyone to tell you what's real and what's not, and then you see your God making out sloppy style with two of his followers, both of whom are constantly bitchy towards you and hate you. I think she was calmer than I would have been at that moment

[runningonspitensunshine]

i need everyone to get 300% more insane about mercymorn right the fuck now. this is a lady who spent ten thousand years learning everything there is to the human body to the point where she could just modify a person blind. just reach in and and tie harrow’s lil noodle spine into a knot, bypassing her lyctoral shielding. seduced her best friend, worst enemy, and sworn god to steal his sperm (it’s also apparently implied she just. summoned it out of his balls instead of collecting it the normal way) to help a terrorist make a baby from it.

she slaps augustine across the mouth and he spits out his teeth, despite the fact that he is a ten thousand year old lyctor who should have had ironclad shielding. out of all the necros that swore themselves to god, she was one of the remaining ones, one of the last lyctors to survive the resurrection beasts.

she vaporized god. she vaporized god. she unwound the most powerful necromancer she knew on the fly and reduced him to his base components because she just. had the knowledge in her brain. mercymorn turned a man running on the souls of ten billion into fine red mist on a fucking impulse.

she spends all of htn trying to kill harrow out of some bizarre attempt to live up to her name. she’s kind about it, even. she draws weird little squiggles that look like everything but monsters. she fantasizes about putting her idiot boss in acid jail. she worries about her dress making her look like a melon even though she literally seduces god and also a guy who hates her.

and nobody really likes her. g1deon is g1deon, by which i mean he is being tortured and weird about everything on account of being two people and thus has little to no opinion on what she does. augustine fucking hates her unless they’re working together to honey trap god (no i will not stop mentioning this) and it wasn’t even her fault that alfred died, not really. ianthe follows augustine around like an evil little duckling - does she even have strong opinions on mercy except that it’s gross she’s having a three way with jod and augustine? she was supposed to mentor harrow, but she got the defective one - the one that didn’t even make to lyctorhood properly (does she wish she could’ve done what harrow did? sealed cristabel away forever, even if she had to butcher herself to do it?). and jod. jod loves her, of course, but he’s just so. so. he doesn’t fucking listen is the thing. he deflects and he jokes and he doesn’t say “mercy, i didn’t meant to, mercy, i’ll fix it, mercy, please, forgive me.” he says everything but that.

god fuck what is wrong with me. what is wrong with you guys. be more insane about mercy she deserves it.