content tags: reader is mentioned to have a period but no gender or sex is specified, college au, established friendship, friends to ???, very brief and subtle suggestive comments? but not towards each other, cussing, i just wanted to make something stupid that makes me giggle, this is just pure crack
a/n: baby's first smau so let me know what you think and if you want more parts to this. or don't i can't tell you what to do.
a/n: if you had to look up who Wile E. Coyote is then there's like an 85% chance you're too young to be on my page
I love how open you are to constructive criticism 🫶🏻 keep up the good work !! you are doing great.
thank you, lovely!! I'm always open to it as long as people are kind and respectful when an honest mistake is made, and it's always good to be educated!! 🤍
it is and has been canon for a while now that dick’s mom is romani. its mentioned in tom taylor’s run too if you wanted to check it out as a south asian person it feels like shit when people dismiss that lol and his heritage hasn’t been mentioned in the animated movies so idk how you could tell that he’s supposed to be white + titans tv show is and has been otherworldly and no one ever takes it seriously, again its okay if you didn’t know just as a south asian it’s odd hope you understand 🫶🏼
I totally didn't mean to make anyone feel bad and I'll definitely do more research on the topic. Thank you for telling me!! Where I'm from heritage or race aren't really talked about so I'm not used to be aware of it and don't know much about it, and I know it's wrong but I'll be more mindful 🫶🏻
I was thinking of the usual portrayal in the comics and movies, where he's generally white! I know there's also a popular interpretation that he has Romani heritage but I wasn't sure if it was canon :) If you could confirm it it'd be nice 🫶🏻
warnings: fluff, smut, pet names, f!reader, afab, established relationship duh, reader is implied to like animals, oral (f!receiving), handjob, use of mommy/good boy, sub!tim for the smut hcs
bf!tim drake who practically lives off of coffee and energy drinks, but especially the coffee that you make him. he thought he knew good coffee before you, but he was wrong. perhaps it's just because he loves you.
bf!tim drake who takes forever to introduce you to the batfam for fear that they'll scare you off, but you end up getting along well with all of them. you bond with damian over his rescue animals, dick finds you entertaining, and jason simply...respects you. and believe it or not, bruce also approves of you.
bf!tim drake who loves to touch. he always wakes you up by cuddling you close, arms tight around your waist. he does his computer work atop of you, his back to your chest as he types away. he holds your hand when you make love, fingers tight against yours as if that single point of contact is grounding him entirely.
bf!tim drake who hides the fact that he's red robin, but never actually gets the chance to tell you. why? you figure it out yourself.
he doesn't know you know until you text him 'are you red robin?' on a random tuesday evening. while his heart did initially drop to his ass, once he concluded that you weren't breaking up with him over it, he admired your casual attitude toward it all. all you did was make him promise that he wouldn't die, and he could do with that.
bf!tim drake who is an eater. 1,000%. no doubt about it. there's nowhere that man would rather be than between your legs. and not to mention that he's good at it too.
"tim, enough!" you whine, trying to shove his head away from your soaked, drippy cunt. however your insistent pushing only makes him bury his head deeper, tongue lapping at your folds.
his hands grip your thighs, keeping your legs spread wide as his tongue thrusts rapidly into you. "mm, no, need more, mommy," he whimpers, eyes rolling back in his head. "so good..."
bf!tim drake who always enjoys your input on his cases. he knows you're a smart woman and he trusts your word. he always wants to know if you think he's on the right track; sometimes he gives you the whole file to let your own brain decipher it. it often ends with him seeing the case in an entirely new light, all thanks to his lady.
bf!tim drake who definitely gives puppy-dog eyes when he wants something. he blinks those pretty, big blue eyes up at you through his lashes, sometimes adding a little pout to really seal the deal. it always works.
bf!tim drake who gets punished by you, and you just love to edge him. you're both sat against the headboard of his bed, him sitting between your legs with his back pressed to your chest. he whimpers and whines and twitches as your hand squeezes him tight as it strokes him. agonizingly slow drags, up and down through the mess of sticky pre-cum that coats him.
you've been stroking him for forever, but every time you can tell he's close, you let go, not touching him again until he's reset.
"p-please, baby, i need it," he moans, hips bucking up into your hand. you respond with a sharp smack to his thigh. "ah-!"
"you were a bad boy," you remind him, your hand tightening around his leaky cock. "you don't deserve to cum."
"but, mommy–"
your thumb swirls around his tip, another glob of pre spurting out. "bad boys don't cum," you reiterate. "sit still, timmy. take it like the good boy i know you can be."
bf!tim drake who causes you to love making coffee. similar to the first headcannon, you've become a bit like a personal barista for your boyfriend, and you've gotten good at it too.
"baby," you smile as you walk into his study where he's slumped over his computer, eyes most definitely too close to the screen. "can you try this, please? i tested something new."
he glances up at you as you approach him, steaming mug in hand. "what's this?"
"a cinnamon dolce latte. i tried to put some cinnamon sugar foamy stuff on the top," you frown, placing the mug in front of him. he tugs you into his lap, your butt resting atop one of his thighs. "i don't think it worked, though..."
"well lets give it a try, baby, hm?" he soothes, smiling tiredly up at you. "i bet my girl made it perfectly, as per usual."
bf!tim drake who only lets you wash his hair, especially at your apartment. as embarrassing as it is, he loves the floral scent of your shampoo and conditioner, the way it makes his black locks all shiny and soft. but most of all he loves the feel of your nimble, gentle fingers scrubbing at his scalp, massaging his temples gently as you clean him.
he particularly enjoys taking baths with you for this very reason. laying together in warm, soapy water, his head heavy on your chest as you scrub and rinse, whispering sweet words in his ear—"so pretty, timmy. such nice hair you've got on this handsome head."
bf!tim drake who definitely adopts cats with you, or at least he wants to. some men dream of raising babies with their woman, but tim? he dreams of raising two sweet balls of fur with you. one ginger cat, one black one—halloween colors. he fantasizes of you playing with the kitties, waving the little feathered toy in their faces and giggling when they paw at it. yep, tim wants cats. with you—and he won't let damian try to label them as his own, either.
featuring: dick grayson, jason todd, bruce wayne, tim drake
contains: angst, hurt no comfort, established relationship, breaking up, pet names, gender neutral reader, a lot of swearing
a/n: dick's was so pathetic i lowkey started feeling bad for him while writing it
IN WHICH... each of the batboys deal with their notoriously sleepy girlfriend
featuring: dick grayson, jason todd, bruce wayne, damian wayne, tim drake
warnings: fluff, f!reader, gf!reader in all except bruce's which is wife!reader, a lil suggestive in Dick's fic, reader is said to be Damian's mother in Bruce's fic, Damian is aged up in his own fic but not Bruce's, Tim calls you 'mother' even tho he's not biologically yours (he just luvs u enuf for you to earn the title!), just a cute lil crack fic!
a/n: i worked VERY hard on this oneshot especially so please show love thru likes, comments, and reblogs! thank you and enjoy :)
dick grayson:
"Oh, baby..." he coos softly as he enters your apartment with his key. There you lie, curled up on the couch under a fluffy blanket, arms clutching a throw pillow like its your lifeline.
You were supposed to have a stay-at-home-date together, maybe a movie marathon on the couch...followed by a sex marathon on your bed. But Dick should've known better than to plan a date to start at 8:30PM, granted you're usually in bed by 9:00 and snoring away by 9:30.
He gingerly sets the bag full of Chinese food on your kitchen counter then puts the two pints of ice cream in the freezer. After everything is situated he makes his way over to you, crouching in front of your sleeping form.
His eyes soften at the sight of his sweet girl, all cuddled up on her couch. He reaches for the blanket, tugging it further up over your shoulders before moving to pet your head.
"Pretty baby..." he murmurs to himself, gently moving the hair out of your eyes so he can see your adorable face. "Of course you'd be sleeping, hm?"
Then, oh so slowly, your eyes begin to blink open. Dick's heart aches with love at how sweet you look—all soft, pliant, eyes blinking innocently and blearily. He reaches a thumb up to softly wipe the little crusts from the corners of your eyes.
"Mmm...Dickie?" you frown drowsily, fists rubbing your eyes awake—fuck, Dick thinks. You're so adorable.
He smiles warmly. "Hi, love." His hand continues to stroke your hair back as you come to your surroundings. "Did you forget something?"
"...I don't think so," you mumble, leaning forward so your forehead rests against his warm, hard chest.
"Hmm," he hums, holding you close to his body. "What about a movie night with a certain special boy?"
He watches in real time as your eyes widen and your face falls. You look at Dick guiltily. "Oh, baby, I'm sorry! Oh, god, what time is it?" you panic, searching through the cushions for your phone.
"Honey, honey," he reaches gently for your wrist, chuckling. "It's okay, its still only 9:00. Are you sure you're up for movies, or do you wanna just shower and head to bed?"
You frown guiltily at your boyfriend. "But you spent money on food..."
"And we can eat it tomorrow," he assures you. "C'mon, my darling, let's go shower."
He scoops you up bridal-style, carrying you to the bathroom and turning on the shower with one arm.
Safe to say you end the night lathered in yummy-smelling lotion and enveloped in your favorite PJ set, Dick's arms holding you securely against his chest. Props to him for scrubbing down your body in the shower, drying and dressing you afterwards, and picking your favorite lotion out of many and rubbing it all over your body—anything to make his sleepy girl comfy.
jason todd:
To be fair, Jason shouldn't have rushed to your apartment and used the spare key you gave him to "break in." But in his defense, what else does a loving boyfriend do when he's called his girl 8 times, texted her 25 times, and left 3 voicemails without answer?
"Doll?" he calls out softly as the door clicks shut behind him. He looks around; all the curtains and blinds are shut, the thermostat is turned down—is anyone else chilly?—and all the lights are off.
"Jesus, baby, it's fucking cold," he mutters to himself, finding your thermostat and turning it up a bit. "Where are ya, hm?"
He spends the next few minutes searching for his baby, and finally, once he lets the bedroom door creak open, he finds you.
"Jay?" you call out groggily, hair a tangled mess, eyes puffy, lips swollen from slumber. "What're you doin'? Your boots are so loud—and you're dragging dirt all over my floors!"
He chuckles softly at your whining, raising his hands in surrender as he toes off his big combat boots, strolling (quietly) over to you in the bed. "What're you doing, baby doll?" he murmurs gently, sitting on the edge of the bed. Immediately your fingers seek out his, curling around his hand to interlock them.
You nuzzle into his big shoulder. Jason's big hand comes up to wipe a bit of dried drool off your face. "What do you mean, what am I doing?" you grumble against him. "I'm sleepin'."
"You're always sleeping," he teases, poking your cheek. He reaches for the brush in your nightstand drawer, turning your head away so he can begin detangling the messy locks.
You harumph, crossing your arms over your chest. "So what? You knew what you were signing up for. I only woke up because I felt my phone buzzing like the world was ending! And because your stupid boots are so loud!–"
"Yes, ma, I get it. You hate my boots. Now, hush, I'm trying to brush all this out."
You let him tend to your hair, calming down a bit once the crankiness from being woken up wears off.
"There," he murmurs, setting the brush down. His hands massage your shoulders gently, kissing the left one and moving his lips up your neck to your jaw.
You melt back against him. "I'm still sleepy...join me?"
"Of course, doll, anything for you," he whispers in your ear, kissing your lips softly before laying you both down. He removes his shirt, tucking you against his bare chest and tugging the duvet up over you. "Rest, my love."
bruce wayne:
"Damian, where's your mother?" Bruce asks the young boy. It's taken him forever to find his son, only for him to be outside with Bat-Cow.
Damian's eyes soften at the mention of his mother. "I've got no idea, father."
Bruce sighs in exasperation, pinching the bridge of his nose. "That woman," he grumbles, going back inside.
"Grayson, where's my wife?" he asks Dick, who's sat the dining table alone, munching (rather loudly) on an apple.
Dick shrugs. "No idea, B. Last I saw her, she was with Jay upstairs. But Jay's out with Roy now, so I dunno."
"Jesus, none of my kids are useful," Bruce sighs, moving onto Tim and ignoring Dick's annoyed Hey!
"Where's mother?" Tim asks Bruce before he can ask.
"I...I was just about to ask you the same thing."
"Well, I think I finally got a lead on my case and want to talk to her about it."
"I can check it out."
"Well, it's me and her case, B. So I want her input."
Bruce groans. "Where is this woman?"
The last place Bruce checks is your shared bedroom, and he realizes suddenly that he should've checked here first. He knows his wife is a big napper...a big one.
"Oh, darling," he sighs, suddenly all gooey and tender as he approaches the big bed. All of the curtains have been shut, making the room entirely dark save for the light from the hallway. Your starfished in the middle of the bed, your eye mask pulled firmly on, blankets and pillows askew.
He stands by the bed for a moment, admiring your beautiful sleeping face, your soft body... After a bit he decides to crawl in beside you. Removing his shirt and socks, he lifts the blanket and slides in in only his pants.
You stir slightly at the feel of someone's big, beefy arms around your waist. And it could only be one person... "Bruce?"
"Hi, honey," he whispers, shushing you. "Shhh...go back to sleep."
You yawn, turning around in his arms to face him. "How long have I been out?"
"No idea, dear. I've been looking all over the manor for you."
You groan, lifting your eye mask off. "Oh, goodness, I wasn't supposed to sleep this long...oh! I was supposed to help Timmy with out case–"
"Stay. He says he's got a lead—he'll be fine. Let me hold you."
Happily, you tuck your head into Bruce's thick neck, sighing contentedly. "Oh, baby, I love you."
"I love you, too, my wife," he kisses your forehead with a tenderness nobody would expect from Batman. "Now rest."
damian wayne:
"She ditched us, Titus," Damian murmurs down to the Great Dane beside him. "Can you believe it?"
He pets the animal's head before standing, brushing the grass off his pants and making his way inside. He's instantly greeted by the sounds of Dick's giggles echoing through the manor, and Jason's annoyed grumbles.
"Dick, man, you're so odd," Jason groans, standing beside his elder brother, unimpressed. "Get your camera outta the poor girl's face—Dames's gonna kill you."
Dick scoffs, continuing to take pictures of your sleeping form from very unflattering angles. "He won't kill me. She's been a family friend of ours for lord knows how long. She's my friend, too!"
"What the hell are you doing to my girlfriend?" Damian scowls as he enters the sitting room. His sharp eyes soften minutely as they zero in on you. There you are, curled into a little ball in the armchair, buried in one of his t-shirts, a bit of drool dribbling from your lips.
The sudden tension in Dick's shoulders is palpable. "Hey, Dami," Dick murmurs sheepishly, quickly pocketing his phone. "You see, I was just showing her a funny TikTok I saw–"
"How? She is sleeping."
Jason snorts, glancing up at Damian. "He was taking photos of her."
Damian glares. "Why?"
"Cus it was funny, man!" Dick defends. "C'mon, she would've laughed! I'm gonna send them to her and watch, she'll crack up."
He rolls his eyes, not wasting any more of his precious attention on his brother. He moves, approaching your limp form and kneeling onto the carpet in front of you.
"Beloved?" he whispers, a hand coming up to cradle your soft cheek.
Immediately your body registers your boyfriend's touch, your head nudging into his palm like a lousy kitten. "Morning, Dami..."
"It is 5 in the afternoon, Habibi. Not morning."
"Oh." You peel open one eye, smiling when you see your sweet boy. "Well, hello anyways."
"Hello to you, too, sweetheart," he murmurs. "You are drooling."
You blush. "Where?" Your hands come up, feeling over your face for it.
"Do not fret, Habibi. I've got it." With a gentleness both Jason and Dick would not have expected from their youngest sibling, Damian lifts a wet thumb to your cheek, wiping away the dried spit that previously occupied the space. "There. My baby is all clean."
" 'My baby'?" Dick laughs, doubling over and clutching his torso as if this is the funniest spectacle. "My god, Dames, where has this side of you been hiding?"
He glares. "I have done nothing to make you laugh as hard as you are, Grayson," he snips, looking to Jason for support. Jason, however, is also stifling a laugh.
As if it couldn't get any worse, Damian then hears a small little giggle from the lovely lady behind him. His head whips around to face you. "You are a traitor."
"Dami, baby!" You giggle, smiling at the adorable little pout on his face. "You're just silly, is all. No need to get so defensive." You reach a hand up, brushing his dark locks out of his eyes.
He softens at the mere feel of your touch. In fact, a small smile tugs at his lips. "So sweet, beloved. Is it because you are sleepy?"
"I'm sleepy," you say, leaning closer. Your lips hover over his, your words whispered into his mouth. "And I'm craving one of my boyfriend's famous soufflés."
Damian frowns. "A soufflé? At this hour?" At your nod, he lets up. "Alright, Habibi. If my darling wants a breakfast for dinner, I suppose I can oblige."
You press a sweet kiss to his awaiting lips. "Yay! Thank you, Dami. You're so kind to me. Can I have bacon and cheese in it, please?"
"Very well, beloved," he murmurs. He begins to stand up, pressing a final kiss to your hairline as his hand smooths over the soft locks. "I love you."
"I love you too, honey."
Glaring daggers at his brothers and ignoring their teasing comments, Damian walks himself to the kitchen. He can hear Jason and Dick following, pestering him with mocking questions, though the lazy throw of his pocket knife juuust past their heads and into the wall shuts them up rather quickly.
tim drake:
Tim had gathered that you'd fallen asleep simply by checking the activity on your phone. Don't ask him why he's able to do that...
Quietly, he slips into your apartment through the window, tip-toeing his way to your bedroom. The door is wide open and he's immediately met with the sight of his lovely girl snuggling her teddy bear to sleep.
"Sweetheart..." he coos softly, removing his shoes and approaching the bed. "Hey."
He nudges your shoulder softly with his hand, making you finally stir. You gasp softly when you see a bleary figure standing in front of you. But simply by the shape of the human and the way it stands, you immediately gather that it's your boyfriend.
"Oh. Hi, Timmy."
"I told you to stop calling me that, but hi."
You smile, tossing the limp teddy over your shoulder and replacing it with Tim's torso. "Mmm... how'd you find me?"
"Your location," he lies. "Just didn't expect you to be asleep."
You only hum, rubbing your cheek against Tim's hard abs through his shirt. "Did you come to snuggle?" you coo, rubbing your eyes awake.
"You know it, baby," he replies. "Now let me in."
You pull the blanket up, expecting him to simply lay beside you. But of course, he's Tim Drake. Why would he do that?
Instead he barrels into you, sprawling himself out on top of you. He lifts your his t-shirt up and snuggles under it, resting against your bare skin.
Ahh...much better," he sighs contentedly, head nestled between your breasts. You feel him take a deep inhale, making you giggle.
"Tim!" You squeal, "what're you doing under there."
"Needed to be close to you," he mumbles.
"Oh, baby," you chuckle softly, a hand coming up to play with whatever dark hair is peeking through the neckline of your his shirt. "You comfy."
"So comfy." His words are muffled against your skin. You feel wet kisses begin to accumulate in the valley of your breasts. "Call me a good boy."
"Well, are you a good boy."
He peeks through your neckhole, scowling. "Yes. I came to check up on my girl when I noticed she wasn't active on her device."
"Hm. So you did hack me?" you catch, smirking at him.
"I-...fine, yes. I did. I'm sorry for lying, mommy," he mutters.
"It's alright, sweet boy. You're mommy's good boy."
If Tim Drake had a tail, it'd be wagging. "Hell yes I am," he agrees enthusiastically. "Night, love you."
"Love you, too, needy boy."
a/n: GUYSSS this took me forever but im very happy w the outcome