I’m a 22 year old genderqueer pillow princess (they/all pronouns) that loves carrot cake and rollie pollies
Just a willing darling looking to vent my frustrations out to the world, maybe even develop a deep debilitating infatuation for anyone that gives me the slightest bit of attention crush on someone out there
Feel free to admire from afar or send your letters my way <3 My diary is yours to read here
Tw: forced kidn4pping, dr*gging, st4lking, legal action against illegal actions, bre4king and entering, gaslighting i think?, degrading/mamipulative talk, implied forc3d regression at the end
THIS IS ALL FANTASY.
"How did I get in? Oh, you know, that "restraining order" is just a piece of paper, and you know how the police fail people in this country. You really shouldn't be surprised, sweetheart.
"And that code on your door? Did you seriously only change it by one number after the arraignment? You're so silly. So silly, so incompetent, so...
"Now, where were we the last time we met? Oh right! When I wanted you padded and babied, but you kept telling me you "wouldn't do it" and "you're a monster" and you only stopped after one day. Just one day! But honestly sweetheart, I think you need it. I mean, those nighttime accidents are only happening more and more since you left, and I really think wearing more would help. And wouldn't being a little baby help all that silly stress you have lately?
"No, sweetheart, I really mean it. I mean, you're a total klutz. Do you know how many times I could have taken you for myself? Padded you forcefully? Toy with your cute little brain? You're struggling on your own mentally and fiscally since I left, which is a real shame. I just think, and hear me out, it'd be better if I decided for you from now on.
"Shhh, sure sure, bring up the order. Bring up the charges. It doesn't change anything about how competent you are, honey. Which - by the way - you're not. Now, just let me lay this diaper out. It has your favorite color on it, isn't that fun? Of course I remember the small stuff like that. Why wouldn't I? I only had a few months in a cell to think about it.
"Ooo, do you wanna know what's more fun than this pretty diaper? Do you see this rag I have? Yeah?? I put one of your favorite smells on it! Do you wanna know what that smells like, darling?? Yeah?? Then take a good..long...whiff. Just for me. Just..stay..still!
"Shhh...shhh shhh shhhhh...shhh...there we go..there we go..there's my good darling..you'll be okay..just close those pretty, weary, eyes...
"Good kiddo. Now, to get you out of this pathetic little apartment.
"I promise you, all of this, what I'm doing, is for the better. Just for you. You'll see. I just need to get you home.
"After all, I spent so much on your baby shower, and all your new family and friends are waiting for you. I got you the cawutest wittle teddy bear with your name on it and my scent in it, just so you know I'm always gonna be with you. Always, little baby. I promise I won't let you leave this time. No, you're gonna be far too little to even think about that.
"Welcome home, my little angel. I love you so so so much."
I’m walking around my house in an oversized hoodie and the winter breeze keeps brushing up against my cunnie and fuck I wish I was in someone’s basement right now.
Tie me up and leave me alone on a mattress and play hypnosis videos so I can stay a pliable toy for you <3 only come down to pump my holes full of cum and piss and leave me there to clean up the mess, it’s what a brat like me deserves
god i'm so obsessed with you. i don't need to wonder where you are, sewing tracking devices into your bag was easy enough. plus that broken ankle should keep you in the house a good long while. days and nights with no sun aren't good for you, so you'll have to hole up by that big gallery window - the one with the pretty view (in and out). its such a shame you took such a nasty fall. and you still aren't sure how it happened? its okay, i don't mind taking care of you every so often.
the pictures are necessary! i'm tracking your healing! plus they look very nice in the back corner of my closet. most of the wall is full of little polaroids. you don't even know about most of them. but i do. webcam print outs. security footage. its all there. i cant just leave evidence of you out and about. freaks and pervs might get to it!
don't tell anyone this, but whenever i get off i think about you. you're just so pretty. my perfect bunny rabbit. one of those photos comes off the wall and i just stare, rutting against my mattress and wishing it was you. i don't cum though. not often. i cant waste whats meant to nourish my pretty pet. dont worry. when i do i make sure it all gets used up. protein is good for you.
i love taking care of you. sometimes i want you to take care of me though. i bought a new toy, one that i can fuck while i think of you. keep my cock nice and warm until you're broken enough to forget how to fight back. its near every night now. i whine into my pillows jerking off into a plastic mouth wishing it was yours. if you heard me i bet it would be. fuck, i'm sorry. i cant help it. you must think i'm some kind of disgusting freak....
Is it bad that I want her to be my stalker that is obsessed with me? Follows me everywhere? Leaves hidden cameras in my room and touches herself while she watches me sleep? Steals my panties to get off to? Eventually breaks into my home with a mask and fucks me while telling me how long she's been waiting for this? Forces me to take her strap over and over again until I fully give in? Maybe kidnaps me and makes me her housewife? Yes? Okay sorry I'll shut up...
1: The last person you kissed screams they love you, you say…
2: Did you get to sleep in today?
3: You never know what you got until you lose it?
4: Do you have siblings?
5: How many kids do you want?
6: Who was the last person you held hands with?
7: Did you stand on your tippy-toes for your last kiss?
8: Do you think if you died, the last person you kissed would care?
9: Last person to talk on the phone?
10: Did anyone watch you the last time you kissed someone?
11: When’s your birthday?
12: Remember the first time you kissed the last person you kissed?
13: What kind of phone do you have?
14: Are you wearing jeans, shorts, sweatpants, or pajama pants?
15: Are you a different person now than you were 5 years ago?
16: What were you doing at 4 am?
17: Would you rather write a paper or give a speech?
18: Are you lying to yourself about something?
19: Last night you felt…?
20: What’s something you cannot wait for?
21: Ever told your parents you were going somewhere but when somewhere different?
22: How many hours of sleep did you get last night?
23: Are you a morning or night person?
24: What did you get your last bruise from?
25: Do you reply to all of your texts?
26: Your phone is ringing. It’s the person you fell hardest for. What do you do?
27: Did your last kiss take place in/on a bed?
28: Anyone you would like to get things straight with?
29: How many months until your birthday?
30: Favorite thing to eat with peanut butter?
31: Did you like this past summer?
32: What were you doing before you got on the computer?
33: Your ex is sitting next to you, with their new partner. What do you do?
34: What is the last thing you said out loud?
35: Your mood summed into one work?
36: Are you doing anything else besides taking this survey?
37: What are your initials?
38: Are you a happy person?
39: Do you still talk to the person you liked 4 months ago?
40: Where do you want to live when your older?
41: Have you had your birthday this year?
42: What did you do yesterday?
43: What will you be doing tomorrow?
44: How late did you stay up last night?
45: Is there anyone you would do anything for?
46: Is it hard to make you laugh?
47: Do you believe ex’s can be just friends?
48: Do you think any of your exes will eventually want to be with you again?
49: How many people have you had feelings for in the year of 2012?
50: Do you wish your ex was dead?
51: Have you ever dyed your hair?
52: Would ever take back someone that cheated?
53: Was New Year’s Even enjoyable?
54: Bet you’re missing someone right now?
55: How would your parents react if you got a tattoo?
56: Sleep on your back or stomach?
57: If you could move away, no questions asked, where would it be ?
58: What would you change about your life right now?
59: Has anything upset you in the past week?
60: Are you on the phone?
61: Today, would you rather go forward a week or back?
62: Would you take $40,000 or a brand new car?
63: Have you ever talked to someone when they were high?
64: Ever cried while you were on the phone with someone?
65: Have you ever copied someone elses homework?
66: Are you the type of person who liks to be out or at home?
67: Do you automatically check your phone when you wake up?
68: Have you ever stayed up all night on the phone?
69: Could you use some sleep right now?
70: Are you going to have a baby by the time you’re 18?
71: Does it bother you when someone hides things from you?
72: What’s your favorite color?
73: Have you ever slept in the same room with someone you liked?
74: Have you ever been looking for something and it was already in your hand?
75: Do you get annoyed easily?
76: If someone liked you, would you want them to tell you?
77: Do you have a person of the opposite sex that you can tell everything to?
78: Does anyone call you babe?
79: How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust?
80: What do you prefer, relationship or one night stand?
81: What color hoodie did you wear last?
82: Is there someone who meant alot to you at one point, and isn’t around anymore?
sorry im autistic can i lock you in a cage and analyse your fucked up psyche in a way that's weirdly sexual and intimate and maybe you bark at me when i poke you through the cage? no? what if I say please?
