Atsadi's Shenanigans

Fanfic and fandom cache. Banner by @/mutualcombat

[atsadi-shenanigans]

Fic Master List

(Banner gif done by the amazing @britonell)

My AO3 profile:

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

It’s all BG3!!!

Holy fuck people made art 🥹:

Drunk Batstarion by @britonell

Eleanor by @lyzelky

Eleanor and Astarion, sitting on a bench by @britonell once again 💜

Eleanors! by @shierke

Astarion is trying to flirt (critical fail) commissioned by @sasseffects and drawn/rendered/colored by @squirrelcurls and @vipermenace

Eleanor and Astarion in their matching outfits! Bonus: Astarion being a total shit. By @lyzelky (😭)

Tent Scene from WSWB chapter 9 commissioned by @allymcfee and created by @summerwarlock

Also Tent Scene from WSWB, commissioned by @allymcfee and created by @crunchyncrumbly

NSFW?

Astarion and Eleanor by @mutualcombat (with more detailed pic of the softness)

Snippets:

Tiddy Cuddles - actually SFW. Batstarion never walks anywhere ever again when he can get uppies.

One Shots (All of them are rated E smutfics):

Stuffing - an entry for Wanksgiving 2023, sexually explicit. Ties into Feeding Alligators.

All I Want for Solstice - happy holidays 2023, have some fluffy smut! Eleanor tries to spread holiday cheer. Astarion tries to spread Eleanor's legs. Rated very much E for explicit sexual content. Technically a two-shot, but whatev.

Valentine’s Day Special - Roses are red, violets are blue, blah blah I’d like to fuck you. Or: Astarion bought a toy. Eleanor wants to give him a night he won’t forget. ASTARION GETS PEGGED.

You Could Just Ask - Astarion is terrible about communicating what he wants. But Eleanor is getting good at translating gremlin. ASTARION GETS PEGGED AGAIN. The man is a MENACE.

Something Full-Bodied and Red - Aunt Flo comes to visit Eleanor. Astarion is thrilled to make her acquaintance.

Tightrope and Lace - Astarion has a proposition: you’d look lovely in rope. And you shouldn’t be the only one who gets to dress for the occasion.

A Misuse of Potions - Pt. 1: Astarion has a plan. A nice, simple plan. His love has been gone for almost a tenday, but now she's back, and he needs her to obliterate him in the best way possible.

Long fics:

All are rated E for sexual content, language, and violence.

Feeding Alligators - Completed:

Turns out, it’s not heart disease that gets you. Not a car crash, the second coming, or even a plain old slip in the shower that removes you from this mortal coil. It’s motherfucking aliens. Your Uncle Randy would be so proud. Or: two losers cheat, stab, and flirt their way to a win.

What Shall We Become - Completed

After tripping a mad wizard’s trap, Astarion—now blinded—must navigate the Underdark with Eleanor back to their crew. These two shitheads must cheat, stab, and flirt their way through flooded caves, monsters, and something hunting them in the dark. All while very confusing feelings begin to muddle up Astarion’s Very Simple plan.

Fingers Sifting Black Earth - In Progress

Astarion’s coming to your tent every night with honeyed nothings on his tongue. Trouble is, you’re starting to smell hints of bullshit. The closer y’all get, the further apart you feel. And then there’s the fucking brainworm cult. These two losers must cheat, stab, and flirt their way to the heart of a cult. And to…whatever it is between them.

[lavenderprose]

Sometimes when Ilya is having a not so great day he sends Shane a dick pic because he knows it will give him a boost of serotonin to see those three dots bounce for an obnoxious amount of time only to get some fuckass response like "Ok" or "You can't send me that without warning" and then Ilya will say "You like?" and Shane will say "Yeah." WITHOUT FAIL. It's their little fucked up version of a kiss on the cheek.

[biglawbear]

I finished reading The Lord of the Rings for the first time in my life. With all of *vague gesture at everything* this going on.

I Am Not Okay

[biglawbear]

You have to understand. I watched the movies maybe once as a kid when they came out twenty years ago. I've somehow avoided learning like anything about these books my entire life. Literally everything about these books was a complete unknown and surprise to me. Totally blank slate going on. I barely even knew how it ended.

Holy shit.

[biglawbear]

Frodo didn't complete his task. Sam literally carried him up Mount Doom. And when he got to the end, he couldn't throw the Ring away.

But for Gollum biting it off with his finger, it wouldn't have been destroyed.

So Frodo's journey saved the world nonetheless.

And it broke him.

It was too much for him to bear. He could no longer live in the Shire or live in Middle-Earth. He wasn't of the world anymore. He had to go to the Undying Lands.

He took on the task that no one else would. He saved the world. Everyone got a happy ending. Aragorn became King, Sam rebuilt the Shire, Merry and Pippin became heroes. They all lived in renown.

But Frodo had the hardest task of all. No one else would do it. A simple hobbit who came by the Ring by chance. Not a King, not an immortal. Not a wizard. No power save his will and his friends. And he did it and saved everyone.

And he never got to rest. He never got to remain in peace. The task destroyed him. It was too much.

But there was no other way. Nobody but a simple hobbit could bear the ring all the way to Mount Doom and resist its power so long. Not a man, not an elf, not a wizard; they would have succumbed. Gandalf knew this, which was why he chose the hobbits in all his designs.

It's amazing that one of the precedent setting works in the fantasy genre holds up so well because it subverts what ultimately became the genre's core tropes. The hero was not the King, or a chosen one. In fact, the hero not being the King was a key point that allowed Aragorn to distract Sauron and allow the task in the first place. The hero was someone unassuming but courageous, who did the thing because no one else would, even though it was just by chance he came upon it.

But Frodo couldn't resist the Ring completely. He wasn't superior to anyone else in that way. And in the end it left him broken. The burden crushed him. No one else could do it, and in the end, he couldn't either. He wasn't so special that he was invulnerable.

I'm not okay. Holy fuck you guys.

[biglawbear]

It's been a week and I'm still not over this, I'll never get over this.

Something that I've been thinking about, as I struggle with depression and anxiety and *another vague gesture at everything* is that LOTR does not criticize Frodo for being broken. It does not shame him or deny him what he needs.

The task was too much and it broke him and that's okay. His friends nonetheless take care of him and let him go with understanding. The book doesn't treat it as a bad thing.

This seems to be a theme throughout the books. The characters rest and heal. They spend time recovering in Rivendell, Fangorn, Lorien, Ithilien. It's treated as good and necessary. They don't heroically endure endless torment from the second they set out until they're done.

And in Gondor's march from Minas Tirith to Mordor, Aragorn recognizes that some of the very few men he's taking with him don't have the heart to go to battle against the Enemy. And he says that's okay. He gives them other tasks the they can do. They hold other strategic points. They aren't shamed for not going all the way, or kicked out, or told that they aren't manly or whatever. Their limitations are recognized and respected. The task was too big and it was okay that they couldn't do it.

I don't know man. I've held on through some absolutely crazy shit. White knuckled through mental health crises when my doctors were begging me to take a break, to go to the hospital before I hurt myself. My therapist has tried to slow me down and tell me that I've been going through it and it's understandable that I am feeling some kind of way. Even one of my colleagues remarked that I've had an absolutely fucking wild career and that I've seen more as a lawyer of seven years than she has as a lawyer of forty. But I've gotten it into my head that I have to be strong, I have to be independent.

Fuck me, man, I'm currently white knuckling through life and hanging on by a fucking thread. A few weeks ago I was about an hour away from checking myself in to a mental health facility until my best friends swooped in to help me. And then I went right back to work.

And then I read this book. This fucking brilliant and beautiful book written by a man who had seen the horrors of war and spilled it all over the page. And I read it for the first time as an adult with full understanding and experience of what it all means. And it hits me like a fucking truck.

And it says that you can't endure everything. That at some point you need to rest and heal. That if you take on too much you will break. And that all of that is okay.

How am I supposed to move on with my life after reading this?

[three--rings]

Certainly there are many messages within Lord of the Rings, but you have to think that Tolkien would have been happy that this message in particular was still being conveyed all these years later.

[romanimp]

I'm tired of hearing about Young Kirk and Young Spock. I want a (good) show about young shithead Science Lieutenant Janeway falling in BFF love with Tuvok while on adventures together and there's ZERO ROMANCE. I MEAN IT. NO ENTERPRISE LOVE BOAT ALLOWED.

[romanimp]

I'm talking ZERO love interests for Janeway as far as the eye can see. People of all genders keep flinging themselves at her but she refuses to let herself do anything more than have a pathetic wank because of her angst about Tau Ceti Prime. She channels everything into raw chaos bisexual energy with Tuvok just enabling her at all times.

[romanimp]

T'Pel asking with pure Vulcan sarcasm if they had fun and in the middle of Tuvok replying that Vulcans only do their duty not have Fun, Janeway (still slightly hungover and wearing sunglasses) slings an arm around his shoulders and says, "SO MUCH fun. You should've been there, T'Pel. You should've seen the way your man risked it all to save my sorry ass from a sentient liquid people. We almost died again."

T'Pel: "Again?"

Tuvok: "....we meditated after."

Janeway: "AND we meditated after!"

[romans-art]

like this.

[lavenderprose]

Ilya finds an odd picture of Shane in a photo album at one point. He's maybe three, he's sitting on the massive purple sofa that Ilya has discovered the Hollanders owned when Shane was born. He's frowning, red-cheeked and he's got a strange plastic case on his thumb.

"Yuna," he says, shifting his elbows on the table to point at it. "What is this on his hand? Was broken?"

Shane's head snaps up from across the table, where he's pretending that Photo Album Time is very boring to him and not worth paying attention to. He hasn't scrolled on the article he's pretending to read for over five minutes.

"I never broke a bone as a kid," he says, brows furrowed. "Not until U13, when that fucking kid from Guelph--"

Yuna and Shane both inhale quickly through their noses in what Ilya has learned to recognize as a moderative measure, lest they start yelling about something that everyone else on Earth has forgotten about.

"No," Yuna says, once her face looks a little less intense. "No, it wasn't broken. It was this...contraption that the dentist gave us to correct his thumb-sucking. He was so mad about it, we only put it on him a few times."

"Oh, Jesus," Shane mutters, eyes going back to his phone.

"Aw," Ilya says. "Poor baby Shane." He taps his finger against one little red cheek and laughs. "You really do look so mad, sweetheart. How did you make him stop?"

"Hmm...you know, I don't remember," Yuna sighs, tilting her head. "I guess he just stopped by himself eventually. Do you remember, Shane?"

"No," Shane says, shortly.

"Of course, that didn't get rid of the oral fixation," Yuna sighs, adjusting her reading glasses as she flips the page. "The things you used to chew on, Shane. Pens and straws and--"

"Mom," Shane snaps, while Ilya vibrates beside him. "Can we not?"

"I was afraid to give him popsicles because I thought he would gnaw on the sticks until he got a splinter in his stomach."

"Mom!"

"Well, honey, it's true! And you did outgrow it eventually, so it's not as if you have to be embarrassed."

"Oh, you did?" Ilya says, shoulders shaking. "You outgrew the, uh, oral fixation?"

"Stop," Shane hisses.

"Mm. Excuse me." Ilya stands from the table and sweeps out onto the back porch, though the sliding door does nothing to prevent the sound of his guffaws from floating back into the kitchen.

"You know," Yuna says, "I'm just going to assume that this is some kind of language barrier thing--"

"Please stop."

[weatherbane]

astarion deserves many things but we're gonna start with a factory reset

[liarsblade]

Fanfiction is cool because you get to learn what other people's parents taught them the hymen is like

[liarsblade]

I know that I had somewhat unusually comprehensive sex ed but it still surprises me every time I'm reminded that some people genuinely think that losing your virginity is a capri sun kind of situation.

[starlingabyss]

Grace found the skittle stash!🎉

[atsadi-shenanigans]

I think Burdens fic updates will resume the weekend of 6/20 or so? Got a funeral to attend and need to build up some chapter inventory, and I don’t wanna push it too fast and burn out. I’ll be back, though. (I’m doing okay, got support and stuff to do, just waiting out the metaphorical storm.)

[katmegere]

It can be a "we" problem

Or why ART no longer lets Three out without a chaperone.

Join the SecUnit Revolution today!

[papercranedoesart]

"to new beginnings"

a slightly late entry to week 4 of @bg3mayflowers for the prompt:

Adorned in Flora

Peonies for resilience and chrysanthemums for endings and new beginnings. This was supposed to be a quick one and then I went a little too hard on the tattoo lol

[atsadi-shenanigans]

Fellow Murderbot fan? Catch up on the latest book yet?

I actually accidentally ore-ordered it twice, lol. Read it the week I got it.

[paperpatchnotes]

Ok someone has to take this away from me before I drive myself insane attmepting to idk art better 🙈

Idk how long I'll be on this murderbot train but these ARE my new favorite books to ever.

[phantomrose96]

That thing where milkmaids were often immunized against small pox because they'd already contracted the weaker cow pox earlier in their lives. That's Tumblr, to me, against whatever the hell social media landscape is happening in 2026.

[phantomrose96]

"TikTok Instagram Youtube-Shorts Share-Your-Whole-Life Influencer Social-Media Online Online Online" it cannot affect me. I was already a weird online 16-year-old all so many years ago. You cannot grab me raw and unfortified with these poisons. I inoculated myself when glomping was a thing. I am still on Tumblr making text poasts.

[marieglbt-art]

[tiffbaxter]

🧡Sweet mother, I cannot weave…🧡 My full drawing of Anglo-Saxon era lesbians for We've Always Been Here artbook along with a look at the progress. (Digital sketch & pencil drawing)

[tiffbaxter]

Shout out to all the #loomheads who are liking this piece. I tried very hard in my research to make it a decent depiction so these tags both make me laugh & very pleased!

[tiffbaxter]

Since a few people have asked me this in a couple of places, I thought i'd answer -

It's not available as a print right now but it will be later in the year, likely October! Sorry for the wait but due to the contract of the art book this is for, I'm not allowed to sell prints/merch etc of the piece until 6 months after the Kickstarter campaign.

TLDR; Please do keep an eye out for a print announcement in October!

[campsis]

Eden Kalif, Good Cats