NOVEM.

LATHER THE BLOOD ON YOUR HANDS.

[heirbane]

(WHY DON'T YOU STAY HERE, UNDER MY TAIL?)

private, selective, and adult only writing and character exploration blog for Gaius Baelsar from Final Fantasy XIV. the content on this blog is not intended for minors or those with triggers that include guns, war, ptsd, mental illnesses, suicide ideation, power play, complicated relationships, age gap ships, or violence. read my FULL rules, updated May 2026.

Personals are welcome to follow and like posts but please do not reblog headcanons or roleplays. You will be blocked.

CARRD.

[heirbane]

Some random personal blog found my headcanons about val and I think they're gonna get put into a fic, lol

[heirbane]

reverse inbox call.

like this post and i'll send you something from a meme i've reblogged recently. (with context, as needed.)

[pup-purgatory]

[heirbane]

Estinien is the third man Gaius has known to have hair at an absurd length. It is something he grew used to seeing among highborn Garlean men: to have lengthy hair meant you oft didn't get it dirty, nor operated heavy machinery often. Very few men in the military - at least, stationed in Garlemald - had hair past their shoulders, and if they did, it was often a higher ranking soldier, showing off their station and the length of their enlistment.

As boys had their heads shaved upon entering basic training, for a Legatus or their Optio to have lengthy locks showed they had come a long way.

So to see Estinien afoot, in the midst of battle and beyond, fringe nigh obscuring his vision and not a hair tie in sight until years after they met -

It is unfathomable, and humorous in a way he can't articulate.

(Gaius has never wanted to pull the hair of another man. He has yanked at the roots during romps and fisted his hand within when they had their face buried in his bedroll, certainly... but he had never wondered how it would look wrapped around his fist, molten silver, the clouds but tangible.

Estinien gaining a hair tie and the means to use it was, perhaps, the best way to cease his distractions - if only a mote.)

[heirbane]

the bingo meme got me thinking, so. here's a general gist of things Gaius Enjoys.

Physically, he's not much into those who aren't able to defend themselves. During his young adulthood in the military, that oft meant those with physical prowess that came close to his own, as Garlemald didn't really use mages in their city-state. It wasn't until he rose to become a Legatus and worked alongside further walks of life that he grew to realize strength and tenacity didn't always equate being able to run malms with military backpacks weighing them down.

This realization, his time abroad, and Garlemald's Ideals come together quite nicely. Due to the nature of Garlemald's rough beginnings, it's unsurprising that the Ideal Body to them is one that is well fed and robust, looking akin to statues and busts common under Solus' reign as Emperor. Even with the industrial revolution and Varis no longer encouraging the arts, the ideal still lingers.

Gaius grew up in Solus' Garlemald. He enjoys a well-defined muscular physique, but he is also quite partial to wide hips and thighs he can dig his fingers into. Both are good in their own respects, and he isn't truly able to pick one over the other.

(He is an ass man. Breasts are fun, but considering most of his one-off romps include him bending his partner over, he's... definitely got a preference in that regard.)

Having become one and the same as his Legatus title for too many years of his life, Gaius did find himself becoming used to - and partial - to standing head and shoulders above his partners. It is not a requirement, but simply something he is unused to not having.

He likes it when his partners know what they like and what they want, especially in short-term relationships or one night stands. He's not there to dally: they're there to release some tension and stress, and having to puzzle out what they want is not his forte. (This definitely is something he grows out of to some degree, as he becomes less impatient and willing to dance with his partners a little.)

Mentally, I think he'd want much the same: someone who is able to keep up to some degree. He doesn't need another military commander or a battlefield strategist. He ideally just wants someone able to get a good read on him without having to explain himself overmuch.

He likes being able to have discussions and debates with his partner/s, and - Praetorium extended edition aside - he also just... enjoys being able to spend time with them, too. Sometimes he wants to just sit and cherish the quiet.

A lot of this, of course, was before his downfall. He once thought that he would eventually be able to retire from the military, maybe become an advisor or a mentor for someone else, and find someone who would stay at his side. He knew marriage was proper, at least in the city, and providing a son to the Empire would be the last piece of his ideal life.

Now, however, without any title or respect - self or otherwise - to allow him to be choosy, Gaius simply... hasn't been looking. He believes himself to be too far gone for any of the happy endings he might have once dreamed of as a young adult: that he could live well in the capitol, have a conventional life after his military career, and perish with all the respects and accolades he had earned.

None of that matters now. The Empire no longer claims him; he is graying and his body is scarred and mangled from his tenure and final battle. He no longer sees himself wedding, surrounded by children adopted and sired, living a happy life with those he loved.

To think anyone would want to be at his side now is laughable, and so he simply doesn't.

[heirbane]

"only use these prompts to portray consensual scenarios"

oh_BROTHER.mp3

[heirbane]

As rote and almost amusing as it may seem, Gaius is, in fact, a big fan of doggy-style joining, especially with parties he has little to no intent to keep around.

He sets certain boundaries for one-night dalliances, and giving his partner(s) the ability to watch him - and vice versa - is one of the things he rarely deviates from. It creates space between himself and his companion, making certain (to him) that nothing is misinterpreted. He is there simply for the romp and nothing else: he shan't get attached to how they look as he fills them or what they look like as they unwind.

It also allows him a hint of privacy should he be unable to keep himself erect. He can change courses without having the questioning gaze upon him. He vastly prefers it that way.

Having a partner where he isn't bending them at the waist, either so they are standing at the side of the bed or so that they are on their hands and knees on the mattress - well.

It simply means things have gotten more messy. (It means he wants to see them come undone. He wants to watch their face and both of their desires against his skin.

It means that they, too, get to observe as he comes, an intimate thing he only shares with recurring partners.)

[heirbane]

also tired of plugsuit art where it is so skintight you can see a lady's nipple shape but it conveniently isn't tight enough to show a man's. gimme man nips. show your mech pilot's bulges and love handles. cowards

[heirbane]

i'm not the target audience for the even gee lion crossover in the next expansion but if it doesn't, AT MINIMUM, mention weryt/gaius/terncliff i will explode, thanks for asking

[heirbane]

go ham w/ sexy headcanons: 2, 11-15 because i literally can't remember half of the specific numbers i want to ask between reading them and getting in your ask box lol

what is their romantic preference or inclination?

None. SKFNGKG Gaius. Wouldn't know romance if it hit him in the face, and if he did he would struggle with it. He is extremely close to the vest with his emotions and, as a result, isn't great at identifying them. To him, he isn't romantically inclined at all, because he isn't sure what that feels like to him.

He is likely just demiromantic. Parts and pieces don't matter. Mutual respect and patience is.

how do they feel about foreplay?

As a teen and fresh adult, he was absolutely not a man who would make sex worth his partner's time. It was a greedy, selfish act, a means to an end, a transaction of sorts. So long as he came and was distracted from The Horrors for a little while, he didn't really care if his partner orgasmed, was fucked uncomfortably raw, or enjoyed it at all. He was an asshole as a new recruit lol.

Once he hit his stride in the military and was no longer the youngest pup desperate to find a place - and, uh, his brain actually finished developing - his view began to change. He still was bad at foreplay, especially with partners he knew were one-offs, but he did make an attempt and was surprised how much better sex was when his partner was properly wined, dined, and lubed.

As a retiree, foreplay is a Requirement. He doesn't get hard at the drop of a hat anymore and generally uses the time as a gauge to see if he actually will get there. He is aware - and resigned - to the fact that sometimes penetration isn't an option with his ED, and has come to be quite proficient at getting his partner to orgasm in other ways. And, sometimes, getting them to do so is just the encouragement he needs to allow himself some enjoyment and a stable erection, and then he can encourage second out of them, too :-)

how do they feel about one-night stands?

They are the only sex he really knows outside of being with Midas. He isn't really sure how sex would be in a committed, exclusive relationship: even when he was with Midas, the engineer was still, on paper, married to his wife. Gaius had been perfectly fine being the young side piece, and it gave him enough freedom to still sleep around if he wanted.

He's fine with it. Exclusivity has never been something he feels worthy of or deserves, and "settling down" after retirement to provide Garlemald more soldiers had been a short-lived consideration as a 30-something. Even in most committed ships, I feel as if Gaius would, likely, accept if his partner sought out others while away from him. After all, he was young once, too.

are they openly flirtatious/sexual, or are they quite private?

I feel like this is tricky because he isn't horribly modest or conservative, but also keeps his emotions, desires, and wants behind about three combination locks and an armed guard. If someone else were to initiate it, he would likely attempt to return in kind, but in hushed ways.

HOWEVER, he also strikes me as the kind of man to put his hand on his partner's thigh under a tablecloth. Flirty, low stakes, low visibility. I think that's more his cup of tea at his current stage in life.

how open are they, or how do they feel about sexual experimentation? elaborate if needed.

At one point I think he was very much just "oral and penetrative sex only, thanks, good day" - again, sex was a means to an end and a way to let off steam. He was eating because he was hungry, not to enjoy the meal, so to speak.

He is open to experimenting with longer flings or friends-with-benefits situations. He won't bring out knives or breath play or being too rough unless his partner requests (or presents it) ahead of time. With more exclusive folks, I do think he is open to trying much, much more. HOWEVER, as mentioned earlier, I do think a certain level of trust and respect has to be met for him to agree to being the receiver/bottom/target/whatever you want to label it.

what is something they consider a kink of their own?

Probably bloodplay/knifeplay/breathplay, or cum eating. He once thought coming on his partner's body was well and good and sexy, but at some point he got to watch a partner lick his spend from their fingers after a handjob and it made him reconsider things.

(Also he would never ever ever admit it but there's something there about eating his partner out after coming in them / making out with them after they swallow / etc etc. And vice versa.)

[heirbane]

[imaknucklehead]

Visit Original Link

explosions in the sky - inside it all feels the same

[heirbane]

ive been thinking about doing a "what characters inspire this character" board like i've seen floating around. but 99% of it is just bad men and terrible fathers from other media lol

[absolmemes]

☾ lustful action prompts.

a litany of prompts exploring intimacy and sexuality. mature audiences only; do not interact if you are a minor. add +reverse to reverse the roles. combine prompts by sending multiple at once. only use these prompts to portray consensual scenarios.

[beg.] sender makes receiver beg before giving them what they want.

[fumble.] sender struggles impatiently with receiver's clothes.

[shh.] sender stuffs their fingers in receiver's mouth to keep them quiet.

[tug.] sender grips receiver's hair to pull them closer.

[tie.] sender binds receiver's wrists with rope / belt / tie / etc.

[bite.] sender sinks their teeth into receiver's neck / shoulder / skin.

[scratch.] sender rakes their nails down receiver's back.

[drip.] sender drips spit into receiver's mouth / onto receiver.

[69.] sender and receiver go down on each other at the same time.

[needy.] sender teases receiver about how desperate they look.

[deep.] sender pushes receiver's head down during oral until they gag.

[eager.] sender holds receiver's head still and fucks their mouth.

[anchor.] sender pins receiver's hips while eating them out.

[grind.] sender grinds their hips into receiver while receiver gives them oral.

[press.] sender pushes a hand against receiver's stomach while inside them.

[hold.] sender grabs receiver's hand to hold while they have sex.

[pin.] sender pins receiver's wrists above their head.

[straddle.] sender straddles receiver's body to restrain them.

[clutch.] sender clutches receiver's jaw to hold their head still.

[hollow.] sender presses a thumb into the hollow of receiver's throat.

[cradle.] sender cradles receiver's throat in their hand, applying light pressure.

[stay.] sender cockwarms receiver.

[breed.] sender fucks receiver deep and finishes inside.

[stare.] sender forces receiver to maintain eye contact.

[cling.] sender wraps their legs tight around receiver's waist while they have sex.

[elevate.] sender places a pillow beneath receiver's hips during sex.

[suckle.] sender sucks on receiver's chest and nipples.

[eavesdrop.] sender fucks receiver where others can hear but not see.

[praise.] sender praises receiver for taking it well.

[hush.] sender forbids receiver from making a sound.

[chokehold.] sender locks receiver's throat in the crook of their arm.

[mark.] sender leaves hickeys on receiver where they will be seen later.

[nuzzle.] sender buries their face in receiver's neck mid-fuck.

[rut.] sender gets caught up, fucking receiver harder without warning.

[heirbane]

also something there re: his previous enjoyment of coming on his partners as a show of dominance. not being able to get thoroughly erect, let alone ejaculate properly, is probably horrifically humbling for him and when he does finally get to have more penetrative sex, i feel like some of the shininess of "i am above you in status so of course i get to dirty your face/chest/wipe my come on your skin" from his youth has finally waned. he still enjoys it from time to time but it's developed from an ego-boosting finale to something he gets consent with and enjoys because of the intimacy within said consent, not because it's a power-trip.

[heirbane]

yes i gave gaius his ed originally as a joke because i didn't want him to ship with folks i wasn't comfortable with and what better way to dissuade people than to say his penis is nonfunctional.

however. learning more about ed and the way it ties into mental illnesses and trauma and the way it touches on a feeling of being wrong and demasculinized after decades of being The Perfect Soldier Man. finding out that anti-depressants are a libido killer, but not being on anti-depressants are also a libido killer, and that that's just how some things be for some people.

and extending that thru the ships i am picky abt in regards to seeing the "imperfections" and loving him as he is anyway. knowing he is a flawed man with a flawed psyche that may be "wrong" no matter how he copes or handles it. finding ways to feel loved and intimate and cherished even without full penetration, especially in ships and situations where he thinks he SHould be the penetrator/top/whatever. and finding flecks of humanity in the moments where he is able to do just that because maybe he is healing and evolving and no longer lost in the sea of his mental illnesses.

it's good food yall.