Hanji Zoe likes butt

Hey, I'm Hanji, and I like dead things. ʚ independent hanji zoe roleplay blog ɞ occasional spoilers & nsfw content ♥ ♥ tracks hellotohanji

[hellotohanji]

Even More Text Message Memes

[text] it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny

[text] I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.

[text] Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.

[text] Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. [text] Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.

[text] All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll off your bed.

[text] Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.

[text] I didn't notice because vodka

[text] I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.

[text] I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden

[text] my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion

[text] I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.

[text] Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.

[text] I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.

[text] My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?

[text] as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts

[text] it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.

[roleplayaskmemes]

Send a Ⴢ for my muses reaction to yours groping them under the table.

-Submitted by anonymous

[commanderesmith-blog]

ρℓeαse.

hellotohanji

                                        •━▬━☰ • ♔ • ☰━▬━•

          Hanji.

     He had to find Hanji. His boots thudded heavily against the stone floor underneath him. Heavy footfalls echoed off the hallway walls as Erwin rushed his way to the squad leader’s private quarters.

     Not even bothering to knock, the Commander immediately grasped the doorknob and pushed forcefully.

     "Hanji, your clothes. Remove them immediately." 

[hellotohanji]

   They had not been in their own room long before the door was slammed open behind them. Turning slowly to face the door, eyes wild and clothes a mess, ruffled and dirty, they smiled.

   "Why should I do that, Erwin?" They set down the book that was in their hands gently on the desk before them. "There is no need to be upset, Erwin."

[mamath]

Mamath’s BOXFOX GIVEAWAY

Just in time for the holiday season, here’s a Boxfox plush giveaway/promo! The giveaway period ends November 30th, midnight EST (New York time). You can refer to this countdown if you’re bad at time zones.

GRAND PRIZE: 6 BOXFOXES Enough Boxfoxes to build your own pyramid! Keep the whole pyramid to yourself or split it up between your friends! Friendship pyramid.

RUNNER UP PRIZE: 1 BOXFOX TWO (2) runner ups will receive one Boxfox each!

To enter, just reblog this post any time from now until midnight EST on November 30th (it’s a Sunday) to be entered in the random draw.

- ONLY ONE REBLOG COUNTS (though further reblogs appreciated) - Likes don’t count for entries - Giveaway blogs are not valid - Have your Ask Box open (so I can contact you if you win!) - Winners have 72 hours to respond before I pick a replacement winner - You have to be okay with giving me a postal address - I’ll ship to anywhere in the world!

You do not have to be following me to participate. If this goes nuts I may add more prizes. If you don’t know what the heck a Boxfox is, refer to this post. If you want to BUY a Boxfox, go to my store here! Good luck!

[batilisketch]

poncho sasuke

[kyomitsu]

リヴァハン（♀）落書き1２

[arachnishima-blog]

                                                   •  ｚｗｉｔｘ  •

                                                              second  (Ⅱ) commander

                                    ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

                            semi-selective ○ mun has 7+ yrs exp ○ nsfw acceptable

                                      friendly mun ○ new muse ○ aus encouraged ○ mun 18+

                                   ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

                       ✗ rules ✗               ✗ about ✗           ✗ askbox ✗       ✗ home ✗

[those-crazy-meme-nights]

Send "A Gentle Kiss" for My Muse's reaction to Your's coming over and randomly kissing them softly on their lips..

[squidbiscuit]

Nobody asked me to draw Levi…..that didn’t stop it from happening though.

[glubtier]

Is that guy doing the can-can dance while wearing a Snuggie?

[993399393939393939393939]

yes

[pxtra-deactivated20150405]

[text: hanjo] alright alright i’m going in

She sends the last text quickly, before locking her phone and putting it in her coat pocket. Petra reaches the front door of Hanji’s home, and without any hesitation, she lets herself in.

"Where’s the pizza? I’m starving."

[hellotohanji]

   As the door creaked open, Hanji whipped their body to face the door, lifting the pizza over their head. "IT'S PIZZA TIME!" they screeched, grumbling in an attempt to replicate some sort of dinosaur or bear.

   "PLEASE come sit your ass down so that I can cram this in my mouth." They returned to their comfortable position, feet on the coffee table and blanket over their lap, setting the pizza down by their feet. They grabbed a breadstick, shoving it in their mouth before slapping the couch cushion beside them. "Let's eat!" they exclaimed, voice muffled by the food that was still hanging out of their mouth. "Oh, and drink. Soda. Soda! I'm so excited, Pttr."

[nadiezda]

Based on this 

[hellotohanji]

[text] if you were actually expecting candles you will be sorely dissappointed

[text] ok let yourself in when you’re here, door’s unlocked

[text] my neighbours dont want to see me in my jammies

[pxtra-deactivated20150405]

[text: hanjo] damn… nvm then

[text: hanjo] alright good hope you’re ready for the time of your life, i’m on my way up

[hellotohanji]

[text] all i need is sweet meaty pizza in my body

[text] i mean i GUESS having you here is cool too

[text] why am i still texting you come in my house woman

[pxtra-deactivated20150405]

hellotohanji:

[text] ill eat a bread stick in attempt to sate my unstoppable hunger

[text] HURRY UP THIS PIZZA SMELLS SO GOOD

[text] alright ptrr, lemme get the candles ready

[text] gotta get some mood lighting ayy lmao

[text: hanjo] i’m speed walking my way over

[text: hanjo] i didn’t mean it like that! but candles are nice so i can’t complain too much

[text: hanjo] i’m around the corner!!! :)

[hellotohanji]

[text] if you were actually expecting candles you will be sorely dissappointed

[text] ok let yourself in when you're here, door's unlocked

[text] my neighbours dont want to see me in my jammies

[sightinadifferentlight-blog]

i have like 60000 people on my blog

and i looked at the counter and theres someone in ohio

i s2g my heart skipped a beat

hello my fellow ohio friend, whoever you may be

[hellotohanji]

that was probably me sorry

[sightinadifferentlight-blog]

hello my fellow ohioan

[hellotohanji]

ayyyy B) ofc hanjis are from the same state. OF COURSE

[pxtra-deactivated20150405]

☒ :3

[text: hanjo] can we just have pizza for dinner tonight?

[hellotohanji]

[text] ICE CREAM!!!

[text] or not

[text] ding dong pizza is here

[text] ding dong i paid for the pizza

[text] hurryyyy i want to put it in my mouth

[pxtra-deactivated20150405]

[text: hanjo] i got us 2 ice cream cones, i wanted one

[text: hanjo] wait don’t eat the pizza hanji i s2g DO NOT EAT WITHOUT ME

[text: hanjo] okay if you want you can have ONE slice, i’m like a block away though

[text: hanjo] get everything ready!!! set the mood 8)

[hellotohanji]

[text] ill eat a bread stick in attempt to sate my unstoppable hunger

[text] HURRY UP THIS PIZZA SMELLS SO GOOD

[text] alright ptrr, lemme get the candles ready

[text] gotta get some mood lighting ayy lmao

[pxtra-deactivated20150405]

☒ :3

[text: hanjo] can we just have pizza for dinner tonight?

[pxtra-deactivated20150405]

[text: hanjo] aww poor hanji

[text: hanjo] i’ll get you some sprite

[text: hanjo] anything else??

[hellotohanji]

[text] ICE CREAM!!!

[text] or not

[text] ding dong pizza is here

[text] ding dong i paid for the pizza

[text] hurryyyy i want to put it in my mouth

[sightinadifferentlight-blog]

i have like 60000 people on my blog

and i looked at the counter and theres someone in ohio

i s2g my heart skipped a beat

hello my fellow ohio friend, whoever you may be

[hellotohanji]

that was probably me sorry