Hells_Samaritan

A chronicle of misdeeds

[lesbiciousbeginnings]

When you’ve been cooking for long enough, you stop making recipes and start making “shit in a skillet” and “whatever soup”

[memeuplift]

[aemondtragaryen-archived]

percy jackson could defeat thanos EASY the avengers are just weak

[aemondtragaryen-archived]

he was 12 when he cut off medusa’s head in the lightning thief. thanos doesn’t even have snakes in his hair he is just some bald dude

[lizzibennet]

it is still absolutely hilarious to me that the bbc’s train of thought while making their 1995 pride and prejudice was like “let us make a historically accurate near scene-by-scene adaptation with near identical dialogue to the book. except for one thing: we are allowed one (1) transgression and that is a wet!darcy scene. no explanation needed” like talk about having ur priorities straight

[thevibraniumvoid]

Yes I re-read my own fics because I wrote them for ME

[landshark1339]

Wish that bitch would update though.

[laughoutloud-club]

We’d all be witches lets be honest

[hell-much]

Stairs in my brother’s guest room.

Fuck getting up them drunk.

Trying to get down, when hungover, still drunk and you really have to pee. That’s when they get you.

[homopower]

Home architects really woke up one day and chose violence.

[datsderbunnyblog]

I love the dynamic in the Discworld fandom on this site, I think it's mainly because there are a lot of dormant fans, if you will, who've read and loved the books for years but haven't engaged much recently, who sort of reappear whenever a fun post is doing the rounds. It's fantastic. We get the cozy small fandom vibe without the screaming matches, but also get the popular posts from time to time, y'know?

[datsderbunnyblog]

YEP. In fact for some people it’s Emotions Day right now.

[datsderbunnyblog]

To everyone tagging and commenting with some variation of “Oh, I almost forgot that it’s tomorrow!”

“Damn! Damn! Damn! Every year he forgot. Well, no. He never forgot. He just put the memories away like old silverware that you didn’t want to tarnish. And every year they came back, sharp and sparkling, and stabbed him in the heart. And today, of all days...”

That’s so very meta of you.

[bostonbakeddeans]

The lilacs have been in bloom for a while so I was afraid they might have already passed before tomorrow... But no. They're still as strong and lovely as ever. It's Feelings Day tomorrow!

[library-mermaid-blog]

Customers who get angry when I read them their total cost are so compelling to me. Take charge of your narrative, Janice. Be the hero of your own story. You are the one who is purchasing $113.67 worth of adult zen coloring books, Janice. It’s not me you hate, Janice. It’s not me.

[whitepeopletwitter]

[r4cs0]

[kissmebluesexyvioletsme]

I shouldn’t be laughing but damn. 😂

[4lienat]

aleksander in season 1: a summary

[crowsnotvultures]

insp. @kallypsowrites​

[tantaliart]

⚡️happy graduation, boys⚡️

[whitebear-ofthe-watertribe]

Justin McElroy’s unfortunately scheduled spaghetti tweet getting posted as the capitol was being invaded by right wing domestic terrorists is the only thing that has genuinely made me laugh in the last 24 hours

I mean:

[birdonawire]

bbc merlin’s political agenda of “i’ll wait for the king to die and fuck his son so good, he’ll have to adopt my politics” was actually so ahead of its time

[tamamita]

Happy Thatcher is in Hell day

[tamamita]

Happy Prince Philip is in Hell day

[jotx]

my job in the comune will be to fuck your mom

[postultimate]

mine is to make love to yours. step your game up.

[jotx]

i just got promoted to giving your father earthshattering prostate orgasms

[postultimate]

my father is a libertarian so nice try but he would never be “pro state”

[minimoefoe]

did you find out prince philip is dead through a tumblr shitpost or are you normal