Two parts crazy fool.

There's a recipe to a good hero, Hawke. Like alchemy. One part down to earth, one part selfless nobility, two parts crazy fool, and season liberally with wild falsehoods. Let that percolate through a good audience for a while, and when you're done, you've got your hero. rogue|purple|nsfw.

[veilstorms]

@herorecipe​.

❝ hawke. what in the creators’ name is that? ❞ they’re out looking for more clues on corypheus’s demon army, the inquisition party deep within an elven ruin in the graves where  they had recently seen signs of venatori  activity  and  a  warden  helmet had been found.          it appears everyone has either cleared out or  dropped dead with shriveled bodies, though,  and the corpses look to be both templar and warden.  the source of the deaths looks to be  some  kind  of  giant  glowing  artifact in the middle of the room.        the door behind them closes  abruptly.  ❝ … okay. ideas? ❞

[herorecipe-blog]

❝ well, in my professional point of view as both an elf and a scholar, it appears to be --” ❞

the door slams behind him, and the dagger hawke had been idly tossing back and forth goes flying. it clatters down rough-shorn stairs, finds its resting point some stone-throw away from the pulsating artifact. a pause, and then, with a surge of queer energy, the dagger moves by its own accord to a pile of  similar weaponry around the green artifact.

❝ --bad. you should go kick it. ❞

[ancicnt-blog]

@herorecipe

“I suppose I look a bit like Andraste with this cloak

‘pon my head, though she’s a bit more blonde than

I—-and!” She flicks the cloak off, smiling with kindly

eyes. “She was no elf. Do you come bother old beings

in tombs often? Some are far less friendly than I… You

were looking for this, weren’t you? ” She holds up an

orb, glowing with an odd light. “Something that used to

be of power, but no more. Once upon a time one could

look within it and see bits of the future. But the magic is

weak thus…it is but a paperweight.”

[herorecipe-blog]

“I don’t think I’m the one to talk about what Andraste might or might not’ve looked like.” Hawke’s hands rest tensely, but amiably, on the twin daggers on either hip. Though she’s not exactly an expert in tomb raiding, finding someone that...well, acts like this woman does? Is... probably out of the ordinary.

“Sorry to say, I’m less interested in what it could do, and more interested in what it can sell for. Lots of people are into old elvhen cr--stuff,” she amends, hastily. Though they’d been separated, who knows if Merrill’s in earshot. 

[ryuuna]

soccer mom of kirkwall everybody

[herorecipe-blog]

i have contained my rage for as long as possible but i shall unleash my FURY UPON YOU LIKE THE CRASHING OF A THOUSAND WAVES.

[herorecipe-blog]

i can't believe i smooched you once.

 Sure, Evelyn. “”Once.””

[herorecipe-blog]

  “I’m not around much, but when I am, it’s to put the most powerful   person in the world in her place.”

[herorecipe-blog]

prophetry

 hey, hawke. :) :) how r u ??

Wow I can’t help but notice………I have more titles than u…….

Sorry, I couldn’t hear you over me clapping. With these two hands that I have.

[herorecipe-blog]

hey, hawke. :) :) how r u ??

   “I can’t believe that I, Annabelle Hawke, Champion of Kirkwall and    Successor Apparent to its Viscountery, Fade-Walker, Taker of the Qun’s   Own Fist, Dragonslayer, Successful Businesswoman, Smuggler and   Layabout, Mostly Accidental Political Assassin, Awakener of The    Newest Threat to Thedas, and Elf-fucker, has to deal with this.”

[cauchemarred-deactivated2016090]

re: fear of spiders

independent widowmaker rp blog. writer / character 21+. nsfw themes. 18+ only.   [home] [ask] [about] [stats] [open] [rules]

[prophetry]

    ❝ I KNOW what I saw. ❞  if it’s all an act it is a convincing one. it takes a bit more than a well-crafted lie to get the herald to question her own assumptions. she tosses one final, prying look toward the champion before returning to her meal despite lack of an appetite.  ❝ Is this the first time anyone has mentioned this sort of thing to you? ❞ 

[herorecipe-blog]

❝ You’re serious. ❞ Her good cheer begins to evaporate. Evie Her Grace isn’t much good for a laugh even at the best of times, so if this is a farce, it’s a poor one indeed. Doubt creeps up her back. ❝ No. Bethany is the only magician in the family. My little brother was a pain in the arse, but not mystically so. ❞

[herorecipe-blog]

“ maybe you shouldn’t look like a bumblebee, bitch.”

     “Better a bumblebee than a giraffe.”

[herorecipe-blog]

"One of the things I like doing most is bangin' whores. I, uh, I go out and bang a lot of whores."

      “I don’t think that’s in the Chant of Light.”

[herorecipe-blog]

"There's this barmaid that Solas is in love with and I banged her."

     “Is that barmaid called Knowledge?”

[herorecipe-blog]

“A power bottom is a bottom that is capable of receiving an enormous amount of power.”

     “--A’course it is. Wait a second, lemme...       HEY, DORIAN! C’MERE.”

[herorecipe-blog]

“Yeah, well, you’ve never once seen me wash my testicles either, but that doesn’t mean I don’t do it every Friday.”

[herorecipe-blog]

"You got to pay the troll toll to get into that boy's hole. You got to pay the troll toll to get in."

They really should have picked someone better than Hawke to serve as the Qunlat translator, but, hey, the only actual Qunari around Skyhold was out of commission. (She didn’t ask questions.)To the manifold Qunari, the champion announces:

   “She says she pays a toll to enter a boy’s hole.”

[herorecipe-blog]

“That right there is the mail. Now let’s talk about the mail. Can we talk about the mail, please, Hawke? I’ve been dying to talk about the mail with you all day, OK? “Pepe Silvia,” this name keeps coming up over and over again. Every day Pepe’s mail is getting sent back to me. Pepe Silvia! Pepe Silvia! I look in the mail, and this whole box is Pepe Silvia! So I say to myself, “I gotta find this guy! I gotta go up to his office and put his mail in the guy’s goddamn hands! Otherwise, he’s never going to get it and he’s going to keep coming back down here.” So I go up to Pepe’s office and what do I find out, Hawke? What do I find out?! There is no Pepe Silvia. The man does not exist, okay? So I decide, “Oh shit, buddy, I gotta dig a little deeper.” There’s no Pepe Silvia? You gotta be kidding me! I got boxes full of Pepe! All right. So I start marchin’ my way down to Carol in HR and I knock on her door and I say, “Carol! Carol! I gotta talk to you about Pepe.” And when I open the door what do I find? There’s not a single goddamn desk in that office! There…is…no…Carol in HR. Hawke, half the employees in this building have been made up. This office is a goddamn ghost town.”