Loser Vampire
Radu looked through the window again. It was almost dusk. He stood and put on his shades. The whole thing about sunlight was a superstition. He was fine with sunlight.
When sober.
Not alcohol, of course, but that heinous issue of old blood bags that had already reached that state of beginning to separate. Radu was able to support his three bags day habit by working for the local Red Cross affiliate in Targu Mures. The job as disposal officer of all tested and unacceptable blood had been years in the making. Not that this mattered to the undead, time was a matter of mortal concern.
Rounding Piata Trandafirilor from the direction of the Orthodox cathedral, he never failed to inverse cross himself, he stared at the ghastly monstrosity of the casino which stood opposed on an infinite number of levels from the Palace of Culture. He was headed to meet Akos, a Szekler youth of prodigious computer skills. The jaunt from his studio apartment was a mere ten minute walk.
"Szia, Akos!" Radu began speaking in Hungarian. "I hope you were able to find the... Uh, the missing bags in the logs?"
"You know I did. You're good," Akos mumbled into his fist as he struck up a Pall Mall. He held out the pack, but Radu demurred. "Can you not smoke? Is that a thing?"
"Oh, I can, sure. I just can't afford the habit," he said shrugging in his coat against the late autumnal evening breezes.
"Why do you have to hide what you're doing? I mean, like, if you got caught, just bite them, right?" Akos gestured as if dismissing the humanity of someone to the likes of a vampire was of no lasting consequence. It mirrored how aggressively he smoked.
Radu eyed the rapidly glowing embers and winced. "No, it isn't that easy. Beside that, it would create competition." He coughed spasmatically. "Gah, you'd think I'd be able to get even a couple good bags."
"Good ones? You said the HIV ones were fine. Did I miss something?"
"No, they're... Ok. It is like eating something with MSG, I think. It is too intense. Too addictive," Radu explained into the now biting wind. "Don't even ask about hepatitis. Baszd meg! Awful taste. Almost enough to make me try a different approach."
The thoroughfare of the Transylvanian city's major artery of trade made Radu wince. So much blood here and he couldn't do like in movies and such. People reported his kind to the police these days. They got laughed off, but they were reported enough to make it not worth the effort.
"So, does it help you get the, uh, the ladies? They're crazy for vampire stuff, if you believe the hype in all the movies and crap," Akos queried.
"Nah. I mean, at first they think it is a joke. They get back to my place, if I'm that lucky, and they just 'nope' on out of there," Radu said as he watched Akos light up another. He waved to take one. They silently took first drags while staring into the foot traffic. "Haven't been that lucky since the 80's."
"Aren't there lady vampires?"
Shrug. Pull at his jacket. "Eh, well..." Radu mumbled as he tried to keep his eyes from watering at the lungful of tar and other toxins. "Gah, they've really kicked it up a notch with these," he said trying to change the subject.
"Whatever. I'm off. See you next week?"
"Sure," Radu said while slipping Akos a few hundred Euro. "Yeah, same thing. Rinse, repeat"















