cannot believe hewesy wasnt taken

wh40k sideblog bc im v normal abt these space marnies 18+ often NSFW. do my best to tag for kinks, lmk if i miss smth

[hewesy]

hi there my partner got me into 40k via playing onepagerules and the seductively labyrinthine wiki rabbitholes. my lore knowledge is loose and whim-propelled but i've read like 30 whole pages of one novel so ive probably learned most of the important stuff. im quite fond of the various slaaneshis, iron warriors, and those funky little gay clowns. im very normal about all these fucked up big mans in space and i have stared at that one painting of perturabo carrying magnus with an expression of rapt endearment for an extremely standard amount of time that has not exceeded even one hour

[hewesy]

is the sanguinius novel good

[hewesy]

me, gay, thinking abt snacks: hmmm i want apple slices with peanut butter...apple slices...my bunny likes apple slices with peanut butter...i cant wait to cut up apple slices for my bunny again...

[hewesy]

what if lonely chaos trophy husband

[hewesy]

mixed III/XV slaaneshi biomancer who likes being pampered and prized so he repeatedly gets himself captured/traded to/involved with warbands who need alliances so he can be gifted/traded/married to powerful warlords to be a coveted status symbol and beloved treasure.

but! they never appreciate him! they always get bored or distracted and go off to "make holy war on the imperium" or some other meaningless nonsense instead of what they should be doing, which is adoring him! of course he gets lonely, how could anyone expect him to stand this terrible, empty isolation? just wasting away in his tower with his books and scrolls and arcane mysteries! so he sits at his window and sighs wistfully and seduces anyone he can get his hands on to salve the ache of not being pursued with slavish dedication. and then the warlord comes back and gets mad at him, when he's just doing what any faithful of slaanesh would do! and then he gets accused of treason for "seducing the warlords holding out from under him," just because the entire planetary apparatus answers only to him now, and then the inevitable rebellion, and sometimes civil war, and it all just gets very messy and dull! and NOBODY is focusing on the important issue of him not being cherished properly, so! nothing for it but to run away, strike out on his own again in hopes of finding his one, true warlord who will adore him with fanatical devotion and never leave his side, like he deserves!

[hewesy]

what if lonely chaos trophy husband

[artistapreguissosa]

⚽Hold on, gramps is being unwhimsical and only technically correct again. It matter naught, for we can root for Whoever We Want To and identify with.

Just a lazy more cartoony one for today.

" Ha? HAH? WHAT DID I SAY??? " — Laughs in heavy Jamaican Australian Irish Accent.

" No Fucking Way— " Perplexed bird noises

" IS THE JUDGE IS FUCKING BLIND? IF HE ISN'T HE IS ABOUT TO BE— "

" Oh he is falling again— and rolling— again. "

" WOOOOOOOAH that was so fast— "

" ... is that spiky-fruit apple pinecone pizza? Disgusting. Even for you. "

It is all of your best guesses as to WHY each boeh Is rooting for who they are and what game They watching. Okay bye~

OH YEAH these are AAAAAA 5250x3500 but cut into nice 2625 chonks for Instagram, digital drawings made on Ibis Paint as Always.

[hewesy]

I dont have a pregnancy kink except for specifically in the context of primarchs and space marines in 40k. get those boys pregnant

[vergilbergart]

jokes that made my friends laugh

[hewesy]

the thing about primarch pregnancy is that it's a really interesting premise from which to explore ideas about bodies and autonomy and the concept of a "species" and also obviously a lot of gender and family dynamics that bloom really nicely out of the setting 40k puts forward, not to mention sex and politics. it's all very juicy, there's a lot of drama to be had, not to mention horror if that's your inclination

however

it also makes for lots of fun dumb goofy sitcom hijinks and i am critically weak to the bit

[viceroy-jericho]

[awesomelyanon]

This soup-erb comic fit too well not to stick Perturabo into it

[court-jesterr]

Don't mind me while Warhammer is consuming me but also...I just love him and want to sit in his lap while he reads books I don't understand.

[lucentgallivanter]

did you know? the workshop will be releasing these warhammers soon:

the Zany Marines, whose rubber chickens have proven to be totally ineffective on the field of battle. every time one of them gets hit by a zapper beam it just leaves them covered in soot and blinking though, so they're actually pretty good at stalemating

the Bitty Boys, who stand all of 5'2" in their armor but are as cheerful, well-scrubbed, and brutally repressive as the best of them

the Stupid Marines, whose nickname is mega unfair and they only got called that because Stoney messed up and thought Hawaii was a type of soda on a social studies quiz one time. they mostly just get Cs, except in Mr. Terwhilicker's class because he's totally got it out for them even though it's him being a huge barfbag half the time. which sucks because yesterday in homeroom Derek was trying to shoot a plasma spitball at Stoney but he missed and it went sailing across the room and landed squarely on Mr. Terwhilicker's big old forehead. well yep, you guessed it, ALL the Stupid Marines got detention, and now they're gonna be spending Friday night picking up trash. which you KNOW Mr. Terwhilicker did on purpose because Friday night is the Spacey Hawkins dance

there were more but i forogt

[skullivander]

Honestly, the combat part of his job is probably easier than playing mediator between soldiers who are forced to live together for months on end.

[speedfree]

Just Horus Eating

The Artist: 逐天作眠梦, commissioned by me.

[yagodnyizefir]

Working with ancient archeotech

[skrankku]

Based on something @relax-and-read-on reblogged!