EVERY POSSIBLE CHASE SHIP, RANKED
this isn't that serious and is just for fun. and also my opinion #myopinion
in rough order of character introduction:
CHASE/HOUSE: the fanfics i've read of them tend to go one of two ways: either house is the big strong man here to soothe and take care of poor little chase, or chase is sweet and soft and takes care of house. screw that. give me chase and house who don't understand one another but demand everything. chase who wants house to see him and lashes out when he doesn't get it; house who thinks of chase as uninteresting but a provider of cheap validation and lashes out when chase has needs. give me two thin-skinned fuck ups who view love as conditional and then let's talk. i don't think they'd ever "date" but i think they'd hook up and regret it. 6/10.
CHASE/WILSON: rarepair. i’ve seen a few and wilson has always been the ‘top’ which strikes me as pretty incorrect. chase would fuck him while wilson lay there having a sexuality crisis. i don’t think they’d get along as a couple: they’d go through the motions but… chase does like Nice People, but wilson isn’t really, and i don’t think wilson would find chase all that compelling. 2/10.
CHASE/CUDDY: interesting. horrible idea. cuddy would settle for chase as someone available and sweet-ish and convenient; chase would confuse validation with attraction. they’d probably get along okay but neither would really be seeing one another; they are merely playing into the other’s expectations. still, they have oddly good chemistry; i can see them flirting drunkenly at some party and then freaking out the next day. 4/10.
CHASE/FOREMAN: fandom has vaguely turned me off to this ship because it tends to read a lot into two things and ignore ninety more. their problem is that they fundamentally do not respect one another. mutually. they know one another well, they have been through the trenches, but in a way i think they know one another too well to ever want to date. i don't think they're totally incompatible as people, more incompatible from experience. still, they'd probably have hatesex and regret it the next day, which could be fun. s6 hatesex... 4/10.
CHASE/CAMERON: you know who i am and you know i love this ship. it does it all: sweet fluff, pining, messy situationships, so much angst and sadness. they were good for one another, but willfully blind to their own problems and both braced for the end long before it was over. i don't think they were always doomed, but i think they were doomed to spiral and once they got in that trap they couldn't get out. by s8, chase isn't in love with her, but he also never got over her. incredible. 10/10.
CHASE/STACY: I think if she came onto him, he'd sleep with her, and he'd feel weird about it -- more because of house than that she's married -- and he'd tell house out of guilt or because he was simply that obvious. interesting plot device, cannot imagine them actually being interested. 1/10.
CHASE/AMBER: hear me out. i think amber is probably too intense for him -- yes, he's into cameron, but she can turn it off; on the other hand, chase is oddly the one one to seem to like amber, pre-wilson, aside from house: he's impressed by her scheming and helps her pro bono, doesn't tattle to house, and is the only one to suggest her for the final team. is he interested? i'm not sure (even without cameron in the picture). does he probably think she's hot and would he sleep with her? absolutely. i think amber would probably find him frustrating: he's not as cynical/ruthless as she thinks, but also not openly soft/nice in a way she might respond to: i think they'd have a snarky situationship they'd both enjoy but that would never get any deeper. 5/10.
CHASE/KUTNER: on paper they're very much alike, but scratch the surface and i think they start to diverge. kutner is very sincere: he's open about his likes and feelings and opinions, even if he hides his damage and isn't as emotionally open. chase can be quite sincere, but masks it with a certain standoffishness and snark. because they both deflect, it's hard to imagine what would trigger them to get more than superficial; i think they'd need a slow burn but i can't picture either of them having the patience or being interested enough off the bat to jump one another. 2/10.
CHASE/COLE: very funny, very unlikely. chase is not going to be all that interested in coaching cole away from his faith and into his arms: on the contrary, chase is more likely to accidentally convince cole to be more religious. they'd have crazy theological talks but never kiss. 1/10.
CHASE/THIRTEEN: an odd case where they make a lot of sense on paper, care deeply about one another, understand and trust one another, and chase is canonically interested... and yet the ship does not really exist, and i too don't really ship it. i think the issue is that by s7, chase's problem is that he's defaulting to sex over relationships, and his friendship with thirteen therefore becomes deeper because it is platonic. there's definitely a universe where they date and travel the world together and have so much fun, but in a way i think they'd also enable one another's worse qualities: not unhealthily per se, but where they both lean too heavily on escapism. they have so much fun, but they don't build anything, you know? i think they both need someone a little more grounding, but the potential is there. 8/10.
CHASE/TAUB: fascinating. i can't imagine it, mostly because they have known one another for five years and have stubbornly, mutually avoided ever evolving past coworkers. i think they'd get along fine, and even have fun together, but taub has no idea what he wants and chase does know but looks for it in the wrong ways, so i think they'd bounce off one another like magnets, no harm no foul. 2/10.
CHASE/MASTERS: if chase stopped hating her, it could honestly be kind of cute. chase thrives when he's given the chance to protect and take care of people; his problem is that he finds masters too deeply annoying to take on this role, and her bluntness doesn't go great with his thin-skinned defensiveness. i don't think it's a deep grudge, more that they didn't meet at the right time for a good impression; i can easily imagine them meeting again in a few years and getting along much better, and we see him soften towards her by the end of s7. i think chase does need someone to bluntly call him out now and then, you know? 6/10.
CHASE/ADAMS: i have such an irrational grudge against this ship. it's not adams's fault, but the way s8 keeps insisting chase is interested and flirts but literally never shows it? we're told he likes her but half the time they're together he's telling her off? the fact that the show treats him rejecting her as a moment of growth an positive development? i don't know. in hypotheticals, i'm not sure what they'd see in one another either: adams is broadly chase's "type," but i'm not sure he's someone she'd be interested in really: adams thrives on conflict and challenge and chase does Not. 1/10.
CHASE/PARK: i truly adore their friendship, but i don't really like the ship: chase is pretty clear he cares about her and likes her but not in that way, and i just don't like the implication that he "needs" to be wrong or change his mind. it's also hard to imagine them as a couple, as they're in very different places in their lives. park's pushiness is very good for him, as is her stubbornness, but i don't know what she gets out of it. i think they're better as friends, or even pseudo-siblings. 3/10.
CHASE/MOIRA: important, good for chase, absolutely a rebound. chase liked her because he saw her as a mirror who he could fix, and went about this by ignoring (briefly) her own agency and desires. his feelings were genuine, but he never really knew her: that's the point. it's impossible for me to imagine them long-term, because it was entirely based on a moment, and the real moira could never live up to everything he wanted her to be. 6/10.
CHASE/TREIBER: the man has been obsessed with chase for ten years. the hate sex would be off the charts. 8/10.
