My Voice

[himanshupanchal07]

Its been 10 days since I came home. But it feels like hell lot of time.Haven't smiled after first 2 days i.e. since Diwali. Every day passes like eternity. Keep on searching for things to do for the day, but find nothing at the end. Just trying to pass time. I am not sure what am I waiting for. I want to go back to Jaipur first and then to Bangalore. But still haven't been able to plan to go out for it. I have planned for 1st of Nov when I will leave for Jaipur and then to Bangalore the same day. Even my relations are jeopardized with everyone I have around family, friends and other close ones. I have not interacted with anyone recently, actually I don't feel like doing so. Every time I talk to anyone it just increases the pain. Never thought I will be feeling jealous of happy people but that's what is happening to me. Now I don't feel anything. All emotions are dried. There was only one place where I tried to find out peace and support but seems like that has become more of cyclone which has tendency to destroy things coming in way. Never thought in my life that I will be going through this situation, at least not as miserable as it is right now. No one in the family is standing beside me putting a hand on my shoulder and giving a bit of confidence, not even fake confidence. I have not heard the things so sour as am hearing nowadays. Everyone had made me feel like I am like the unwanted son who just grew up to bring disgrace. I understand my parents did a lot of hard work to raise me, to impart me excellent education and to fulfill all my wishes. But my wish to marry girl of my choice doesn't mean I am betraying them. Why does it make them think that I am leaving the house and there won't be any relations between them and me afterwards. They may have seen failure cases in their lives but it doesn't mean there aren't any successful love marriages. I believe the percentage of success is more than the failures. Everyone keeps on preaching me daily about my parents ill health, their sacrifices for me, their name and status in the society and telling me that I am not worrying about anything of it and I am just being selfish. I don't understand where do they get thoughts that I don't want to take care of them. I want to serve them my whole life, keep them happy, take care of them and make them proud in future. Just wanting to live with a partner of my own choice doesn't change anything, at the end we will be family. I keep on thinking to say that I am leaving and going back to Bangalore, but something is stopping me, I don't know what but something in me. I am not afraid to go but I don't know what is it. Its time now I will have to tell them I am leaving and going to join my job back again. I have enough of lectures now, I am really completely fade up of all this listening, my head will burst out soon. Hope this time I don't get any counter and not forced to stay.

[himanshupanchal07]

My Name My Enemy

I am brought up in a lower middle class family in a small district town in Rajasthan. Well educated and trained with all the Sanskars. Have always been the Agyakaari beta of my family. Never ever raised my voice against any elder. Was always happy with what I was given, never demanded anything. So was the most decent and liked son of the family. Studied hard : Everyone Happy Became Engineer : Everyone Happy Got job in an MNC : Everyone Happy Then my family started asking me to get marry at the age of 24 which I denied because I wanted to achieve a lot many things before getting married and settling down. Suddenly I became the bad guy. I have been handling the pressure for last 3 years. Now when I felt ready, I asked my parents to see a girl I like.Now I became the ENEMY of the family. I am the person who is bringing the family name in disgrace. The person because of whom the family members are not able to show their faces to people. Now they are even regretting that they got me educated because education opened up my mind and thoughts. You know why all this. Because the girl is not from my so called CASTE. They want me to marry a girl of my Caste about whom I barely know anything. Even if I know her I like someone else. I had been running from all this for a long time now. But I was tricked and in the name of Diwali celebration I was called home. Now the situation is I am more like a home captive right now until I am not engaged to some girl. I am not allowed to go back to Bangalore where I work. I had even been asked to resign my job from home itself and not to return at all. All these things just because I liked a girl perfect for me in all aspects and the most compatible person I would have ever met. Yesterday I was taken forcibly to meet a girl of my caste. I am doing all this just because of the emotional blackmail of my parents of their physical problems and social status and also threats.And I also know they would blackmail and torture me which they have been doing continuously for last many days which has already put me in a distress situation and have made me mentally sick. Why all this just for the sake of maintaining the caste name that does not even has any status of its own already. Am I not allowed live the life of my own, to chose a partner of my wish with whom I want to spend my life with. Just because a person shares the same caste with me does not make him or her the best for me. When people say that marriages are made in heaven then who are these people to break the law of heaven. Who gives these people, who call themselves the santris of the castes, the authority to rule people and make laws for them. Who the hell are they to allow a person or not to share the same caste. And even now in this time why educated learned working people still fall prey to this hypocrisy. I even tried breaking it.No one would believe what response did I receive. My family told me that people are not so open minded to understand you. So if they are not open minded shall I also become one. I got a 'YES' in the reply. That was as more of a shock then surprise for me. This is hypocrisy we all still follow. We want to become modern Indian but we don't want lose ends with the ridiculous past. Not sure if anyone out there can provide me any help here right now as I m ready to fight against it provided the visibility to the changes are visible to the world. But do remember me on 30th Jan when we remember Martyr's Day. The day Mahatma Gandhi died serving his whole life to humanism trying to break all such shackles which are not letting us breath. And after so many years I still feel breathless.

[himanshupanchal07]

Shout against Casteism

Thousands of years ago our society was divided into different castes on the basis of their work.This division was made to enable a person to understand his responsibility of WORK(just the work). But its not the same in today's world. In today's time caste of a person is nowhere related to his profession or work but more of a symbol of the part of the society where he is stuck into. Why do we not have same differentiation of castes on the basis of profession, if that is we would have all people of all castes in one family. Today for people there caste is symbol of pride, my question is why so ? Shouldn't our work and service to society in general be our reason of pride instead the institution of castesim. Castesim has crippled our society so deeply that now any support would not let it stand back on its own feet. Knowingly or unknowingly we all are suffering from the evils effects of it in our daily lives. Even while telling name a person has an expression depending on his/her caste. And on the other side of conversation another person starts manipulating in his/her mind 'The other person is of this or that caste. Whether is it a low caste or high caste. Shall I talk to him/her. Shall I keep relations or not.' Is this correct to think like for any individual ? Does a person's name resembles his/her character, abilities or nature. Isn't this a hypocrite or orthodox behavior ? The social structure of castes was created to organize people not to separate them and distinguish them as low or high and decide their fate irrespective of their abilities.I am not completely against the structure of castes but only to a point I support it where it does not interfere in human rights. People in their own senses want to follow the norms of so called castes can do so for their own but should not force any other person to do so. Again in spiritual view point, human being is the creation of God. And when God creates any human he does not stamp on head as to which caste he/she belongs to. Neither HE takes permission or applies to the santris of the castes as I have a person to be given birth to, do you have a vacancy in your caste. Human is made of a soul and a body. Soul is ever living and body is going to weathered out and destroy. Neither soul nor body has a caste then how come a combination of both i.e. a human has a caste. The only caste or religion of a human is Humanism where all are equal and same.Does God has any caste ? When we consider God almighty as our caretaker of being then why do we indulge our whole life in such beliefs.By doing this aren't we disrespecting our God and His creation. If the concept of casteism was so important in human lives, then why great people like Mahatma Gandhi, Raja Ram Mohan Roy, Dayanand Saraswati who fought their whole lives against it and are respected today. All our phases of lives including studies, marriage, politics etc. are spend around the castes and we fall prey to a logic which does not has any importance actually. Our Constitution and Human Rights does not allow us to distinguish among  people on the basis of castes but still we all do it, and that too proudly. Don't we now require to have laws that can help us save ourselves in our daily life to fight against the shackles of casteism. Need all the support that anyone out there can provide to fight against it.Else do remember me on 30th Jan when we remember Martyr's Day. The day Mahatma Gandhi died serving his whole life to humanism trying to break all such shackles which are not letting us breath. And after so many years I still feel breathless.

[himanshupanchal07]

Casteism and InterCaste Marriage

In Hinduism, marriage is not just a ritual but a compulsory notion. All Hindu Gods are also shown with there wives in pictures and prayers. In Hindu mythologies like in Ramayan and Mahabharata we can learn how Bhagwan Ram and Krishna got married. In both the incidences they married according to their abilities to win and fight for their better half. To marry Maa Sita and Rukmani was there own decision not their parents. In none of these Granth we study about concept of marriage in the caste or arrange marriages. If that is so what is the caste of our Gods ? Marriage is a concept involving meeting of two people who take oath to spend lives together and may and may not produce children and continue humanity. In the whole concept identification of people involved is not dependent on his religion or caste. Marriage require two people with maximum compatibility with each other, who can survive the life with the other even if there is no third person available. But in our world we have the caste as the main basis on which the people are brought together and are tied knots together irrespective of their concerns. In our society, first of all loving someone is considered ill and even if that is digested, loving someone out of your caste is evil. To marry that person is out of the equation completely.We are not allowed to choose people of our likes if he/she is not of our caste even though he/she is perfect for you and you will be the happiest in your life with him/her. Loving someone is still not considered as a beautiful feeling gifted to humans by The creator. Its still considered as evil. If that is so, then why do we have a God named Kamdev.Any individual on birth first belongs to humanism before belonging to any caste, then why he/she is made to follow certain which he didn't agree to follow with or which he doesn't even want to acknowledge. Even look at the duality of the people where they change the opinion as per their own comfort ability. On one hand, they say that marriages and couples are made in heaven, but when that happens on earth where two different individuals of different castes marry, its considered evil. Those people are expelled from the caste like some vestigial organs by the santris of the caste. They are disowned by the same parents who prayed day and night to have them as baby.And above all that,they are even killed in the name of honor. Does killing increases the honor of the people ? Why don't people understand that a man create society not the society creates man. In today's India, where we are shouting out loud to provide equality to all in every aspect, but casteism is still not seen by as a big hurdle towards to equality. Our society allows few people do enjoy their freedom to do anything they want just because they are rich and powerful.Are rich people out of bound of this stringent norms, just because they have lots of money that makes them capable of making their own rules to live life. There is a saying "Religion and castes are for the poor.". It does stays true considering today's society. Rich people can survive alone in the society without being asked questions about their lives and can make people follow them. But poor ones need to stay together to survive which makes the institute of casteism so important for them.But weren't all rich, poor once. Many great people spent their lives to uproot the pest of this hypocrisy but the roots are very strong and deep and we are still hanging on the branches of this pest. Indian culture says 'Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam', which means we are one family, the whole world is one family. And all people are same and equal. We all know it but why don't we believe it. Why do we have so many discrimination among the same family. Isn't this the time now to move forward and work for a better and prosperous Indian society without such discrimination and acceptance of a human as a human.