@hiswildflowr - Tumblr Blog

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macrolit

“A well-chosen book saves you from everything, including yourself.”

— F. Scott Fitzgerald

harold-shes-lesbian

this is too real though

girlsandart

SNL has pretty much never given any fucks but lately they’re at the point of giving negative fucks

fuocogo

You can tell the audience is struggling to not aknowledge accurate this is since the accuracy is the funny part.

hiswildflowr

So damn true

sir-daddys-fun-house-returns

Never EVER punish without explaining why first.

Always explain why they’re being punished. Only use punishments that both have agreed to and consented to; preferably ones outlined in a contract. Keep an example list of infractions and their punishments.

Never use or remove items of comfort as punishment. Avoid distancing or limiting contact with yourself as a form of punishment.

The punishment should always “fit the crime”. Avoid over-punishing as well as under-punishing.

Once the punishment has been administered, then it’s done. No dwelling on it or bringing up what they did wrong.

Explain, give examples, and give alternatives to avoid future offenses.

Reassure and comfort them afterwards.

Most importantly, learn and move on.

- Sir Daddy

xxxamorexxx-deactivated20221208

This 👆🏻

poemswords

amysubmits

Needs

I’ve probably said things like “I need accountability.” (or “I need structure.”, or to feel owned, or a firm hand, or rules, or guidance, or to feel safe being vulnerable, and lots of others)” dozens, maybe hundreds of times on this blog.

Of course, needs are things we require. I remember learning needs vs wants in third grade. The textbook said human needs are food, water and shelter. That’s it. The end. So I see why it may read to some that “needing” rules is absurd. Or why they may read me write “I need accountability.” and then assume that I mean “I need a disciplinarian in order to get by.” but that isn’t at all what I mean. What we require can change depending on our circumstances. You may only need food, water, and shelter to survive, but we can talk about need in ways that are totally unrelated to simply surviving. Most of the time when I talk about what I need here on my blog, I’m talking about what I need within a D/s relationship with @cynicaldom. This can include things I need in order to let go of control, what I need in order to feel safe submitting, what I need in order to feel vulnerable opening up about my desires, what I need in order to trust and admire my Dominant, what I need from him in order to give him what he needs from me, and more.

I functioned just fine before I had rules given to me by my Dominant. Well before I had lived D/s I desired clear expectations, limits and boundaries, structure and to be told ‘no’ if I was doing something that wasn’t in my best interest. But I got by without that, and I was pretty happy even. I was drawn to the idea of "old fashioned” relationships from a very young age. In hindsight, I realize that was my subby heart often read Dominance and submission into the depictions of old fashioned relationships, and I was drawn to that idea because I was seeking to submit, to let my future man lead my relationship. So I’m not at all trying to say the bone-deep desire to live this way isn’t just part of me. It definitely is just part of me and I am certainly more fulfilled in life when I get to live D/s. But…

I don’t need a Dominant looking over me in order to be a functioning member of society. If I am going to submit, I need more than I would otherwise need. I require a lot more when I am living D/s because submission is vulnerable, I give more of myself, and D/s is an exchange.

There are things that I need in order to fully open up my submission and to let go of control. For me, I need to rules, clear expectations and structure to be there so that when I let go I don’t feel like I’m just blowing in the wind. I need accountability so that if I somehow wriggle away a bit too far, there is something to pull me back where I belong. I need to feel the presence of his leadership regularly so that I can breathe and know that he’s got those things I let go of handled.

While I let go of more when I’m submitting, I also pick up more responsibilities when I live as a submissive. Through living D/s, I now have rules and chores and the expectation that I will behave in certain ways, and the expectation that I will take my commitments to CD very seriously. Because of those, I need to see him committing to his responsibilities to make it feel fair that I am held accountable to my responsibilities so strictly. I regularly place his wants above my own which requires a bit of sacrifice, so I need to know it is appreciated to avoid feeling used. In part, I need to see his appreciation for my submission through his other actions. I need to see that he considers my feelings regularly, that he keeps space open to hear my opinions, and that when he makes decisions for us both that he does so with our mutual best interest at heart.

So when I start submitting, I find myself with far more needs than I had before. I’m giving more so I need to get more. That doesn’t mean I can’t take care of myself or get by on my own in another setting. It means submission is vulnerable and it’s a big commitment, it requires me to be emotionally naked. If I’m going to get emotionally naked for him, I need to know he’s going to put in the work required to keep me warm.

instructor144

Boop!

Can somebody PLEASE tell me why I have like a dozen Boops in my inbox? Did someone decree Boop Monday and I missed the memo?

hiswildflowr

Psst @instructor144 its Tuesday

Bwhaha

sweetly-submissively-yours

There’s Just Something About You

There’s just something about you.

You touch me in ways I’ve never experienced before. It’s in the little things you do, the effortless way you interact with me that always feels genuine and real.

Maybe it’s the way you make me laugh with your humor and wit.

Maybe it’s the vulnerability you’ve shown me in your openness and empathy.

Maybe it’s how you shorten my name when you say it, how easily it rolls off of your tongue with a confidence and familiarity that makes it seem like you’ve been calling me that for years.

Maybe it’s the way you listen to my neurotic, anxious, obsessive ramblings and never judge me or show me any frustration or irritation - just endless patience and support.

Maybe it’s the way you run your fingers through your hair when your hands are unoccupied, making me smile and turning me on in the exact same moment.

Maybe it’s the way you call me beautiful, and cute, and sexy - and I actually believe you mean it, even though I never believe it from anyone else.

Maybe it’s how we never seem to run out of things to talk about, and it is never forced or difficult.

Maybe it’s the strength of character you’ve displayed by admitting when you’ve been wrong - earning my full respect in one emotional conversation.

Maybe it’s the way you accept me exactly as I am.

Or maybe it’s the way you love me when I can’t love myself.

I don’t know, baby.

There’s just something about you.

sweetly-submissively-yours

Begging

As your devoted submissive, I will crawl to you.

I will worship your mind, your heart, and your body.

I will give you my trust, my vulnerability, and my liberty.

I will be your biggest champion.

I will support you in all of your dreams and desires.

I will dedicate myself to your wants and your needs.

I will beg you for your orgasms and the privilege of pleasuring your cock.

But if I have to beg you for your love, care, and attention, you are not my Dom.

sirsadistic

12 Reasons I need to have a Dominant in my life

1.) I need the structure and rules in order to feel fulfilled.

2.) I need to have someone to care for and be valuable to

3.) I crave the intensity of D/s interactions

4.) The feeling of ownership makes me feel safe and free

5.) Having someone in my life who is willing to push my boundaries has made me a better person

6.) I need someone who craves me and wants me just as much as I do them and I have not found that in the vanilla world

7.) I need to be held accountable for my actions in a way that only a D/s relationship can provide

8.) I love having a person who will take me down dark paths of desire

9.) I have desires that require absolute trust in order to be fulfilled

10.) I crave that moment when I can finally let go and fully submit and my mind finally quiets

11.) Sometimes I just need the feelings of hands on my throat or buried in my hair and the whisper of “You are Mine” in my ear

12.) Pain is an incredible turn on and I have yet to meet a vanilla who understands why I want it

sexybabygirl711-deactivated2026

Absolutely

naughtysoutherngent

persephonessecret-deactivated20

I can do sex myself. I need someone else for their mind to stimulate me, to make me better, so that together, we are both better than either of us are apart — sexually and in every other way. Anything less than that is nice, but once you’ve had the other, there’s no going back. Unless you have amnesia.

little-ones-stuff

Bang on

filthypoppins-deactivated201812

M / s

I felt in my bones

accepted and seen

I felt picked up

Cherished

Loved

“You are Mine.”

Not a question

Not a command

A statement of fact

A release of such pent up fear and frustration

My body shook with it

And I was one with the Earth

One with Him

And all was

Finally

Right

— Christine Rogers Odell

hiswildflowr

Sir

thepaintedbench

herliege-deactivated20210126

Little things

There are many ways to make someone feel cherished, loved, protected, yes… owned. Some may involve ‘leather and chains’. But a lot of the time, and certainly in public, little things mean the most.

A quietly whispered ‘no’ when picking an outfit in a store, a hand on a shoulder in a restaurant, how about a quick approving nod across a room. Clearly a hand can wander, an arm may squeeze that little bit tighter, fingers twisting or tugging a lock of hair. Simple things.

Not every sub wears a collar, not every Dom has a whip hanging from their belt. D/s can be expressed in the smallest of tokens, gestures, movements, Between a Dom and a sub the raising of an eyebrow can be enough, mean more than a lengthy conversation.

Someone might hold their partner that little bit tighter than necessary, perhaps let that finger linger on bare skin just a little bit longer, that hand a slightly firmer hold, signifying perhaps just a little bit more than usual.

One finger in the right spot, just a thumb rubbing gently perhaps, causing goosebumps inside and out. Barely noticeable for an outsider, but for those to whom it matters a simple sign that says ‘you’re mine’.

Little things. So very important.

M. / Her Liege

submissive-seeking

The gift of Dominance enables the submissive to surrender more than their body. The gift of Dominance is the gift of freedom to simply be. “And at long last, I am a human being, no longer a human doing …”

hplyrikz

Clear your mind here

hiswildflowr

@othernamesblog

"Let people feel the weight of who you are and let them deal with it " -John Eldridge

I spend an awful lot of time wondering if I'm too much for Daddy. I believe this quote means to cease that way of thinking. To not worry and hide who we truly are. Let go. Be our full authentic selves. Let the ones we love decide if we are too much.

I think they will surprise each of us. Daddy certainly did. He takes all of me on. Making me feel safe and loved. My safety net.

So what if your partner decides the weight of who you are is, in fact, too much? That's on them. We each have our limits as to what we can handle. Hold strong knowing you are perfect for someone whose arms are empty. Longing for the weight of someone like you.

#my thoughts #personal #quote #submisssion #letting go