[somethinglikeamonkey-deactivate]

[sniperwithasmoke]

Give me some credit, Holmes, I’ve more tact than that—not much, I’ll give you. But it’s there. Though, do keep in mind I’ve not completely written it off.

No, I need.. [a decidedly uncomfortable look comes over him] —information. As it were.

[holmes-scienceofdeduction]

"As it were"? Either you need information or you don't, Moran. If you could at least try to speak in plain English, the world would be very grateful.

I'm not in the business of helping criminals. Did you even read the website?

[hisarchenemy]

"Oh please;  manners wouldn’t go amiss, Sherlock, although I have long-known of your inability to apply them. …Am I not allowed to visit my own brother?”

[holmes-scienceofdeduction]

Oh, a visit, is it? Social niceties, tea, polite conversation?

Kill me now.

[lexingtonconchord]

Chaos breeds geniuses. It offers a man something to be a genius about.

BF Skinner, Walden Two (via lexingtonconchord)

[yellow-buds-of-may]

[historical-nonfiction]

Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

Hanlon’s Razor.

[onemoremiraclesherlock-doctorwho]

[sniperwithasmoke]

Your loss, innit. Believe it or not, though, s’not why I’m here. 

[holmes-scienceofdeduction]

Oh, let me guess, you're here to kill me.

[sniperwithasmoke]

I wouldn’t go so far as t’ say desperate, Holmes, though I don’t disagree.. with most of th’ rest. Care t’ see what it is you think I’m compensating over? Heh.

[holmes-scienceofdeduction]

Although, the fact that your thoughts immediately went to the contents of your badly-fitting underwear rather answers my question.

[copingwithboredom-blog]

Oh, I have plenty you’d be interested in, Sherlock. Quite suited to your tastes.

Buuuuut it seems you’ve already made up your mind.

[holmes-scienceofdeduction]

I don't have tastes. However, I do suggest you break it off with Miss Hooper sooner rather than later - her incessant chatter is insufferable at the best of times.

[holmes-scienceofdeduction]

Specific is what I do.

[copingwithboredom-blog]

Suppose that’s why you’re a big fancy detective, then. People don’t know the things you do.

[holmes-scienceofdeduction]

Yes, well, John is endeavouring to change that.

Now, if you don't have anything interesting that requires my attention, the door's that way.

[ibelieveinsherlockblog-deactiva]

[bibliophilebunny]

“The world is full of obvious things which nobody by any chance ever observes.”

[copingwithboredom-blog]

That’s quite specific.

[holmes-scienceofdeduction]

Specific is what I do.

[copingwithboredom-blog]

Oh, please do.

[holmes-scienceofdeduction]

Acqua di Gio, Giorgio Armani. London’s gay clubs reek of it. It’s marketed as a masculine aroma, but the combination of citrus, persimmon, jasmine and patchouli make the scent far more floral than its advertising campaign would dare allude to. The reason you continue to buy it, however - now that’s where it gets interesting. A man in such obvious denial about his sexuality should have disregarded the bottle immediately after testing it in the shop. But you? You bought it and wear it daily. That suggests an emotional response to it. The only explanation is that you encountered it during a particularly memorable night out. Since the olfactory nerve is located very close to the area of the brain responsible for emotional memory, one simple inhalation at the perfume counter in Boots was all it took to trigger a very vivid memory. One that took place in one of the aforementioned clubs.

[sebastianwouldbeappalled]

"If your tea making talent hasn’t quite improved as much as your deduction skills, I will have to very respectfully decline.

I might, however, feel tempted to order the latter for dessert. With shortbread, should you have any.”

[holmes-scienceofdeduction]

How did you do it?

[copingwithboredom-blog]

Hm? And what’s so obvious?

[holmes-scienceofdeduction]

Your t-shirt - that particular shade of grey says you're unconcerned about the perspiration a straight man of such a shy disposition would usually suffer when in the company of a woman he's only had one - no, two - dates with. Then there's the brand. Not cheap, but not exactly breaking the bank. You've been reading men's fashion magazines, but they're not your usual reading material. No, this is a new addition. Looking for tips, most likely. The clothing they recommend is beyond the paycheck of a simple IT technician, so you bought the next best thing - a high street knock-off. The only trouble is, no straight man would be seen dead wearing a neckline that revealing.

Shall we move on to your cologne?