i used this hellsite during formative years & cant

"We're gonna take away access to the tumblr account you've had for six years! Now here, take this support email that doesn't work. Go, fetch!"And I go "Why are you doing this to me?!"And they go, "Because we’re Tumblr Dot Com, and this site is a fucking nightmare~!"

[dadvans]

happy 100th birthday dick van d-slur

[egberts]

one of the most fucked up aspects of being an adult is really how life-goes-on everything is. like you can be dealing with the most fucked up trauma-drama-grief and still have to sleep and eat food to survive and like. poop. pooping while you're really sad shouldn't be a thing but it is. we don't have a say in the matter. life goes on

[magpiedraws]

Jon he's really trying here cut him a break

(tumblr crunched the resolution of this comic a lot rip)

[see-arcane]

Van Helsing: “I hope it’s okay if I, a man-stranger, compliment your wife in front of you”

Jonathan ‘Does Not Know What a Jealousy Is’ Harker: “I have my entire schedule cleared in the hopes of hearing people talk about how great Mina is. Please go on.”

[brothermouse-skeleton]

The thing you need to know about Johnathan Harker is that the nuns who found him on the side of the road crazed, half starved, and ranting about bloodsucking monsters wrote on his report card that "Johnathan is a delight to have in class"

The man is telling anyone who will listen about how the devil walks the earth like a man and climbs the walls like a lizard and still never forgets to say please and thank you. Mina was absolutely right to wife him.

[lauralot89]

if you ever feel incompetent just remember that Dracula was a military leader who graduated from wizard school and yet his best plan to break into a house was to throw a wolf through a window

[vvanillavveins]

I don't think we give Jonathan Harker nearly enough credit for his absolutely unhinged choices. In 1897, that pathetic wet cat of a man was written with enough grit, willpower, and raw human stupidity to rival any of our modern horror podcast protagonists. When faced with a centuries-old vampire, in a coffin, drenched in fresh blood, he really thought the best thing to do was to hit it in the face WITH A SHOVEL. The audacity. The misplaced confidence. The sheer desperation. No plan. No hesitation. Running on fear and spite alone. And i fucking love him for it. Truly the character of all time.

[marghen]

It's an old tale from way back when/ And we're gonna sing it again and again...

[hamletteprinceofdenmark]

Everyone wish my good friend Jonathan luck, he's studying to pass the bar rn and apparently has a big work trip/promotion thingy coming up 🥺

[it-was-dead-when-i-found-it]

Ok idk who came up with making a "cleaningsona" but that hack works so damn well?? I absolutely cannot clean my room until I put on my most Victorian blouse, my fangs, start playing my funky little vampire playlist, and pretend I'm an 800 year old immortal who's bittersweet about packing up and moving to a new town with a new identity because locals are starting to catch on that I'm a vampire

[stainlesssteellocust]

I’m sat drunk in the beer garden of a rock bar and some chick is happily explaining that “So Jonathan Harker goes to this castle in Transylvania and he doesn’t know he’s in Dracula, right” to a guy who seems totally enthralled and I wish them nothing but the best

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

Happy annual Dracula Paprika Discourse Day to those who celebrate!

[moodsandtenses]

There's something hilarious about how so much subsequent media has positioned Vampires and Werewolves as, like, binary opposite entities, and then you read Dracula (1897) and realize that wolves are that guy's preferred solution to every problem. You'd say something to Dracula about "ah yes, werewolves, vampires' great eternal enemies," and he'd just be like "you mean my subcontractors?"

[effemimaniac]

hey. don't cry. I went to Mad At You island and none of your friends were there :)

[bakugou-kacchan]

why were you at mad at me island

[2urban2fantasy-deactivated20241]

DEPOPULATING IT

[herssian]

ya gotta stop caring what people think and start being extremely weird. but never cruel. i think that might save you

[molabuddy]

having long distance friends is so fucked. do you wanna come over to my house and play (it will cost us 1 william dollars)

[hybridmagpie]

Visit Original Link

Zagreus sits inside your head Zagreus lives among the dead Zagreus sees you in your bed And eats you when you’re sleeping Zagreus at the end of days Zagreus lies all other ways Zagreus comes when time’s a maze And all of history’s weeping Zagreus taking time apart Zagreus fears the hero heart Zagreus seeks the final part The reward he is reaping Zagreus sings when all is lost Zagreus takes all those he’s crossed Zagreus wins and all is cost The hero’s hearts he’s keeping Zagreus seeks the hero’s ship Zagreus needs the web to rip Zagreus sups time at a drip And life aside, he’s sweeping Zagreus waits at the end of the world For Zagreus is the end of the world His time is the end of time His moment is Time’s undoing

Oh my lands I was not expecting this much feedback on this.. How can you like this?? My voice sucks???? -sobs-  if you want to download it, note me and I’ll send you the link