garfeild on a string

she / it, I program sometimes (⁠^⁠.⁠_⁠.⁠^⁠)⁠ﾉ occasional rebloger of nsfw content dni: ladybugs. why are you in my room!!! get the fuck out!!!!!! how are you getting through my window????????

[horsescary]

taking a photo every day of 2026 day 1

[thememedaddy]

[justeplume]

Save me hyperpop

[mya-kuza]

[lizardsfromspace]

The exception is cheesy local commercials. Those should be the only ads. I will listen to someone who runs a store in my city doing an awkward rap. We once had a furniture store with these awful CGI ads and the slogan "where the deals are so low, it's almost criminal!" and then they got shut down, by the cops, because it turned out. It turned out the deals were so low because. You're not going to believe this but the prices were so low it was in fact

[replicated]

i'm not really into blondes but this is an objectively absurd connection to make

[not100bees]

In order to be properly non-pedophilic you have to want to fuck somebody old but not with gray or white hair because that's too close to blonde which as we've established is the hair color of children. So ideally somebody old as fuck but bald. And obviously wanting to have sex with a man is misogynistic so it has to be a woman. And it can't be a white woman because that would be racist and it can't be a woman of color because that would be fetishistic, so ideally a woman with some unnatural skin color, oh let's say, purple. But it can't be an alien, because we don't know anything about alien life cycles so it could be an alien child or an alien that looks like a child. So it has to be an animal from Earth, but obviously one of human level intelligence that can communicate is otherwise that would be bestiality. So an old purple female animal that can speak English. I think the only creature you can be hot for is the Ant Queen from A Bug's Life.

[kholdseid]

[dogpuppy]

[dogpuppy]

[orionthebirdguy]

this came to me in a dream

[just-spacetrash]

in my little pony universe youd go to a job interview and theyd be like so how does your cutiemark reflect your dedication to this position. And every time youd have to spew some bullshit about how your cutiemark of two tennis rackets actually means youre a team player and good at multitasking and view the market like a playing field. or whatever. and you wouldnt even get the job

[contemptible-scoundrel]

you have a fetish for being... tied up...? [winces] but how would you move?

[cloth-fabric]

Maison Amory - fw26

[senatortedcruz]

Wonderful photo

[glamourcorpse]

[yatvowel]

[eighth-order-simulacra]

woman moment

[uprightbat]

[azrakon]

[the-grand-author-ne]

[remy-labelle-purple]

[escuerzoresucitado]

Common tree shrew

[lettheladylead]

can you draw something for me to masturbate to

sure

good luck!

[gunsandfireandshit]

PLEASE READ THIS ARTICLE

[gothcostco]

From another article i read today 😭

[hustlerose]

alt link

[rincewindthecheese]

he wasn’t even there to be a contestant he joined the crew as a CHINESE TEACHER but the directors noticed his good looks and begged him to compete. poor guy made it to the finals and if he had been one of the winners he would have been contractually forced to be in a boy band whether he wanted to or not

[lastvalyrian]

this is the closest any human being has ever come to actually being sold to One Direction