The Problem's Me

"You wanna know what I confessed in there? What my greatest sin was? It was how many times I've let you down." [Tracking tag - huntingsamwinchester] [Sam Winchester - Indie RP] [M!A Status: None] [Mun +20 / Possible NSFW]

[itendsbad]

— 10.23

[godshipsit]

au: after faking their deaths, ruby and anna meet again to spend the rest of eternity together. 

[huntingsamwinchester]

Anyone want to rp?

[sunrisejared]

[huntingsamwinchester]

"It's going to be okay."

“How do I stop?”

[generalspnrp-blog]

“One step at a time. Okay? First let’s get away from here.” Kiara urged, taking a step towards Sam.

[huntingsamwinchester]

“Kiara, I don’t think I can.” he breathed shakily, he clenched the knife in his hand and held it over his palm, he could feel heat run through his arms, the pain felt almost unbearable.”

[generalspnrp-blog]

“You can. I know you can.” Kiara said, taking another step forward, getting close enough so that she could reach out and grab both his hands. She didn’t make any attempt to take the blade from him or separate it from his palm, if she tried to force it she knew he would fight back. “You’ve done so much Sam. This isn’t the way, You, Dean, and I will find another way. This isn’t worth losing you.” She coaxed, still keeping her hands where they were, gently grasped over the back of his hand and his other wrist. “You’re not alone, Sam.”

[huntingsamwinchester]

Glancing down at their hands, almost intertwining together. It was her her soft palms that made him settle just a bit. But the warmth of her hands felt like it was adding more heat. In fact, his skin felt so hot, he was afraid it he would burn her. Upon realizing this, he began to tug away from her. Trying to free himself from her gentle grasp. “Kiara, please…” He trailed, almost begging.

[generalspnrp-blog]

“Sam, no. ” She insisted, keeping her hands where they were but being careful to not accidentally let him cut himself. “This isn’t going to solve anything. It’s going to kill you, you know that. ” She pleaded. “Sam, please put the knife down. We can stop all of this. You just have to put the knife down. Dean and I aren’t going to let you slip away for anything. ”

[huntingsamwinchester]

Sam felt for Kiara, in a way he hadn’t felt for anyone in a long time. But, she wasn’t the reason why he felt this way. Infact, she was really the one who genuinely made him happy. But, this, was something she couldn’t fix. No, this had nothing to do with her. It was that he felt he let everyone down time and time again. More importantly, he let Dean down.

“This isn’t your fight.” He hushed in a low tone. “This has nothing to do with you…” He felt he owed the world a favor. He could go down doing one thing right. If closing the gates of hell cost him his life, so be it.

“Other people will die if I don’t finish this.”

[generalspnrp-blog]

She shook her head and bit her lip. “If it’s a fight to keep you then it is my fight. ” She urged. “You’re worth fighting for and I’m not going to give up on you. ” She didn’t know how many of her words would sink in. After a moment she took another step towards him, only inches separated the two. “More people are going to die regardless of whether you do this or not, but if you go through with it then the world is losing another great man. ”

[huntingsamwinchester]

Sam frowned a bit. He felt faint and sick. The heat in his arms still lingered, barely noticing her inch closer to him. He could barely register what she was saying. But rather, he was much more focused on how close she was to him. They’ve never really been this close before…intimate almost. Her smaller figure fit almost perfectly with his own. Before he realized it, he slowly slid his arms around her waist. Bringing her closer to him, hunched over as he buried his head in the crook of her neck. “…I don’t know how to let go.” He whimpered.

[generalspnrp-blog]

Kiara was surprised to feel his hands wrap around her waist, and even more surprised when he pulled her closer. It was so obvious he needed help, that he was clinging to a way out. She wrapped her arms around his back, feeling his shoulder blades under her hands and his head rest on her shoulder. “All the guilt, all the responsibility you feel, whatever wrongs you want to right, let them go. Focus on right here and right now.” She said in a hushed voice before she moved her arms to lift his head from her shoulder and cradled his face with her hands. “Everything else, except for you and me, together like this. Let it all fade away.” She said before closing her eyes and bringing her lips to his, gently kissing him then parting to try and peer into his eyes.

[huntingsamwinchester]

His eyes fluttered just a bit. There was so much running through his mind. He felt as though, it was his job, even if it took his life, he was okay with that. Dean was usually his go-to person, his older brother that did everything in his power to keep Sam safe, and more importantly, alive. Though he would do the same for Dean. 

He could never really talk to him, about how he was feeling. He could never really express his sadness, let alone cry infront of him unless it was just too much to bear. Sam always tried to keep a strong front, to show his brother how he could take care of himself, so he wouldn’t have to worry or stress so much about him.

But Kiara...

Kiara was special to him. 

His eyes closed just as she pressed her soft warm lips against his.

She was something he had never thought he’d be able to experience. Someone who he could let his guard down with. He could pour his whole heart out to her, and she’d just sit next to him and stroke his back. She’d never have to say anything. It was usually just the two of them. 

His eyes fluttered open, gazing deeply into her ocean blue eyes. The light in his arms retracting. He could feel the heat also begin to settle as he leaned down for another kiss. Their lips barely touching until he violently pulled away and writhed in pain. Gasping, he cried out with his eyes wide open. 

[huntingsamwinchester]

"Where are your clothes?"

“…”

[generalspnrp-blog]

“My question still stands.You can flex all you want but at least put on a towel.”

[huntingsamwinchester]

“Make me.”

[generalspnrp-blog]

“Fine!” Kiara blurted out before throwing a towel at him. “Around your waist, like a normal person.”

[huntingsamwinchester]

Sam strolled towards her, the towel barely covering himself, letting the towel dropped down his leg. He leaned down, just barely pressing his body into hers as he pinned her against the small table.

[generalspnrp-blog]

“Sam? What are you doing?” She asked as he walked towards her. Her cheeks and the tips of her ears turning a bright shade of pink. She felt the towel drop between the two of them but refused to look down. Before she knew it she was against the table, staring up at him, eyes wide. “What’s wrong with you?” This wasn’t like him. Something was off and she was starting to feel scared.

[huntingsamwinchester]

A smirked played across his lips as he leaned inward, till his face was inches away from hers. His eyes, empty and cold. Ue didn’t say a word for a long moment, almost as if he were studying her. He knew he would have never done this. But ever since he came back, there wasn’t, anything there. It was like he didn’t care about anything. Not that he cared anyway. “I’ve seen how you look at me.” He muttered huskily. Leaning closer to her neck, his lips just barely grazing her skin. He then paused and pulled back. “But you’re not my type.” He smirked and pulled away from her. He picked up the towel and wrapped it around his waist and chuckled.

[generalspnrp-blog]

Kiara’s eyes narrowed at him in anger and then widened, totally freaked out and uncomfortable with what he was doing. This wasn’t the Sam she knew. Sam would never do this. He would never make her feel this way, he would never treat her like this. Her face grew hot when he backed away and said those awful things. Once he was covered, she stomped over to him and swung her hand as hard as she could, striking him across the face. “The only way I look at you lately is as a pig, you bastard. Don’t flatter yourself!” She said coldly before turning to walk out the door.

[huntingsamwinchester]

Sam felt a force come in contact with his cheek, soon followed by a sting that hurt like hell. Surprised by her action, he did nothing but simply stand there, but just for a brief moment. 

Regaining his composure, another small smirk played on his lips. In a blink of an eye, his demeanor immediately changed and his voice softened. 

“Kiara, Kiara wait.” He scrambled towards her, keeping his towel from falling, but slid one arm around her shoulders, and pulled her into him. Her smaller frame being pressed into his bare skin.  He rest his head forehead against her head. His hold on her was gentle and warm, just as he would have held her before. “Kiara, I’m sorry, I don’t know what’s been going on with me. I feel like there’s something, inside of me, that’s trying to claw it’s way out.” He humbled himself. “It’s like I can’t control it.”

[jensennackels-deactivated201707]

“Please stop, you’re scaring me.”

[generalspnrp-blog]

Plz love me

________________________________________________

YOU DARE SEND ME BANANAS!!?

[huntingsamwinchester]

PLZ. I NEED UR LOVE

[deactivated-blog]

gif meme | sam winchester + 05: bruised & battered | for @eowynties

[sunrisejared]

[sasquatchandleatherjacket]

it’s not real.

[huntingsamwinchester]

"Let's get you out of here."

Sam muffled

[generalspnrp-blog]

Kiara took the rag from his mouth. “Someone really had it out for you. Or was really into you.” She commented before starting to undo the ties on his wrist.

[huntingsamwinchester]

"Becky." Sam huffed with annoyance. Once freed from his restraints. His eyes fluttered and pursed his lips. Slightly red, he asked, "Kiara, have you seen my pants." Doing everything within his power to avoid her gaze.

[huntingsamwinchester]

"Where are your clothes?"

“…”

[generalspnrp-blog]

“My question still stands.You can flex all you want but at least put on a towel.”

[huntingsamwinchester]

“Make me.”

[generalspnrp-blog]

“Fine!” Kiara blurted out before throwing a towel at him. “Around your waist, like a normal person.”

[huntingsamwinchester]

Sam strolled towards her, the towel barely covering himself, letting the towel dropped down his leg. He leaned down, just barely pressing his body into hers as he pinned her against the small table.

[generalspnrp-blog]

“Sam? What are you doing?” She asked as he walked towards her. Her cheeks and the tips of her ears turning a bright shade of pink. She felt the towel drop between the two of them but refused to look down. Before she knew it she was against the table, staring up at him, eyes wide. “What’s wrong with you?” This wasn’t like him. Something was off and she was starting to feel scared.

[huntingsamwinchester]

A smirked played across his lips as he leaned inward, till his face was inches away from hers. His eyes, empty and cold. Ue didn’t say a word for a long moment, almost as if he were studying her. He knew he would have never done this. But ever since he came back, there wasn’t, anything there. It was like he didn’t care about anything. Not that he cared anyway. “I’ve seen how you look at me.” He muttered huskily. Leaning closer to her neck, his lips just barely grazing her skin. He then paused and pulled back. “But you’re not my type.” He smirked and pulled away from her. He picked up the towel and wrapped it around his waist and chuckled.

[huntingsamwinchester]

"It's going to be okay."

“How do I stop?”

[generalspnrp-blog]

“One step at a time. Okay? First let’s get away from here.” Kiara urged, taking a step towards Sam.

[huntingsamwinchester]

“Kiara, I don’t think I can.” he breathed shakily, he clenched the knife in his hand and held it over his palm, he could feel heat run through his arms, the pain felt almost unbearable.”

[generalspnrp-blog]

“You can. I know you can.” Kiara said, taking another step forward, getting close enough so that she could reach out and grab both his hands. She didn’t make any attempt to take the blade from him or separate it from his palm, if she tried to force it she knew he would fight back. “You’ve done so much Sam. This isn’t the way, You, Dean, and I will find another way. This isn’t worth losing you.” She coaxed, still keeping her hands where they were, gently grasped over the back of his hand and his other wrist. “You’re not alone, Sam.”

[huntingsamwinchester]

Glancing down at their hands, almost intertwining together. It was her her soft palms that made him settle just a bit. But the warmth of her hands felt like it was adding more heat. In fact, his skin felt so hot, he was afraid it he would burn her. Upon realizing this, he began to tug away from her. Trying to free himself from her gentle grasp. “Kiara, please…” He trailed, almost begging.

[generalspnrp-blog]

“Sam, no. ” She insisted, keeping her hands where they were but being careful to not accidentally let him cut himself. “This isn’t going to solve anything. It’s going to kill you, you know that. ” She pleaded. “Sam, please put the knife down. We can stop all of this. You just have to put the knife down. Dean and I aren’t going to let you slip away for anything. ”

[huntingsamwinchester]

Sam felt for Kiara, in a way he hadn’t felt for anyone in a long time. But, she wasn’t the reason why he felt this way. Infact, she was really the one who genuinely made him happy. But, this, was something she couldn’t fix. No, this had nothing to do with her. It was that he felt he let everyone down time and time again. More importantly, he let Dean down.

“This isn’t your fight.” He hushed in a low tone. “This has nothing to do with you…” He felt he owed the world a favor. He could go down doing one thing right. If closing the gates of hell cost him his life, so be it.

“Other people will die if I don’t finish this.”

[generalspnrp-blog]

She shook her head and bit her lip. “If it’s a fight to keep you then it is my fight. ” She urged. “You’re worth fighting for and I’m not going to give up on you. ” She didn’t know how many of her words would sink in. After a moment she took another step towards him, only inches separated the two. “More people are going to die regardless of whether you do this or not, but if you go through with it then the world is losing another great man. ”

[huntingsamwinchester]

Sam frowned a bit. He felt faint and sick. The heat in his arms still lingered, barely noticing her inch closer to him. He could barely register what she was saying. But rather, he was much more focused on how close she was to him. They've never really been this close before...intimate almost. Her smaller figure fit almost perfectly with his own. Before he realized it, he slowly slid his arms around her waist. Bringing her closer to him, hunched over as he buried his head in the crook of her neck. "...I don't know how to let go." He whimpered.

[huntingsamwinchester]

Hey cutie...

Hello buttsnuff!

[huntingsamwinchester]

tsuyuei replied to your post:"It's going to be okay."

No you’re great dear!

I love you

[huntingsamwinchester]

"It's going to be okay."

“How do I stop?”

[generalspnrp-blog]

“One step at a time. Okay? First let’s get away from here.” Kiara urged, taking a step towards Sam.

[huntingsamwinchester]

“Kiara, I don’t think I can.” he breathed shakily, he clenched the knife in his hand and held it over his palm, he could feel heat run through his arms, the pain felt almost unbearable.”

[generalspnrp-blog]

“You can. I know you can.” Kiara said, taking another step forward, getting close enough so that she could reach out and grab both his hands. She didn’t make any attempt to take the blade from him or separate it from his palm, if she tried to force it she knew he would fight back. “You’ve done so much Sam. This isn’t the way, You, Dean, and I will find another way. This isn’t worth losing you.” She coaxed, still keeping her hands where they were, gently grasped over the back of his hand and his other wrist. “You’re not alone, Sam.”

[huntingsamwinchester]

Glancing down at their hands, almost intertwining together. It was her her soft palms that made him settle just a bit. But the warmth of her hands felt like it was adding more heat. In fact, his skin felt so hot, he was afraid it he would burn her. Upon realizing this, he began to tug away from her. Trying to free himself from her gentle grasp. “Kiara, please…” He trailed, almost begging.

[generalspnrp-blog]

“Sam, no. ” She insisted, keeping her hands where they were but being careful to not accidentally let him cut himself. “This isn’t going to solve anything. It’s going to kill you, you know that. ” She pleaded. “Sam, please put the knife down. We can stop all of this. You just have to put the knife down. Dean and I aren’t going to let you slip away for anything. ”

[huntingsamwinchester]

Sam felt for Kiara, in a way he hadn’t felt for anyone in a long time. But, she wasn’t the reason why he felt this way. Infact, she was really the one who genuinely made him happy. But, this, was something she couldn’t fix. No, this had nothing to do with her. It was that he felt he let everyone down time and time again. More importantly, he let Dean down.

“This isn’t your fight.” He hushed in a low tone. “This has nothing to do with you…” He felt he owed the world a favor. He could go down doing one thing right. If closing the gates of hell cost him his life, so be it.

“Other people will die if I don’t finish this.”