Side blog where I let my hyper-fixated brain gremlins take the wheel Current obsession(s): The Pitt If you saw me posting about one of my old hyper-fixations. No you didnāt.
āItās not that deepā how are you. going to come here and criticize me. for reading too much into something. on the reading too much into something website?????
listen. Iām all for āwriters deserving of having their boundaries respectedā but this is so funny to me and like the funniest part is that I donāt think itās even grounded in reality. like, how are you going to require proof that your readers are in your specific age range? why does it matter to you how old your readers are??? they are???? strangers???? why do you care? how does it affect you? š
but to be fair, this is some shit I did when I was 12 and thought I was edgy too. so I get it.
While I know realistically it was purely just the heat of the scene that Robby's stethoscope comes flying off of him when he shoves Langdon out the doors after finding the pills, I can't help but overthink it as a very fascinating representation of what's going on in that scene.
Robby probably breaks some kind protocol by demanding Langdon to open his locker. Definitely breaks decorum when he hits his fist against them. He throws all of Langdon's things on the ground. He throws them back at Langdon when he physically shoves him out. Even Langdon makes a mention of being teased for an injury by his boss and the head of the department.
I don't have to say it because we all know what Langdon was doing was wrong, but the way that Robby handled the entire situation can't have been the right course of action.
While up until this point, we've seen Robby cracking with him being snippy with Mohan and Collins, him getting short with Langdon earlier, as well as the ongoing following into the bathroom and seeing him break slowly apart, I think this is the first major display we get of the ways in which Robby's endless trail of ghosts catches up to him. The first major moment of him losing his place in the hospital, of crashing down to Earth, and his stethoscope goes with it.
Especially interesting when thinking about this in conjunction with him leaving it on the railing when he's on the roof later and the meaning behind that, isn't it?
To be honest, if Robby went the rest of his life never seeing Frank Langdon ever again, he might be okay with it. He might be able live. As if he'd had his lungs filled halfway with sand, merely careful not to breathe too deep or exhale too hard.
It wasn't at the hospital. It wasn't at a bar. It wasn't cornered in some grand way that made the floor crumble under him, give way to the weight of their hearts and kill them both. It was on a bench at a park that Robby was walking through.
Langdon was at a park, presumably with his kids. It was May, that made sense. The weather was permitting it, and there were other kids on the playground, other parents around, the world continued to spin despite his own stopping so long ago. Langdon didn't suddenly cease to exist the moment Robby walked inside after their fight.
He looked good, maybe. He was far enough away it took him a second to recognize, but Langdon looked.. healthy.
Something about the fact that there was a difference made the top of his gut flare hot in a resentful embarrassment. A little, disgusted voice mocking him going why didn't you notice he wasn't?
He had filled out a little. Since knowing him, Robby couldn't have pictured him without that slight gaunt to his cheeks, that ever-present darkness under his eyes despite the sparkle just above. Robby couldn't pinpoint when the color left Langdon's skin, but he could tell now, looking at him sitting in the sun, that it had returned.
There was muscle back in his arms. He was chatting with someone on a bench, arms crossed, presumably a parent friend considering the small kid on the lap of the other person. He had sunglasses on but if he had to put money on it, Robby would guess the hallow that had been carved around his bones was gone.
Langdon looked like someone who was recovering. Because he had something to recover from. Something that Robby hadn't noticed.
Just the thought reminded him of the shrapnel still embedded in the soles of his feet, pieces he couldn't bring himself to dig in and remove, preferring instead to feel them grind with every step he took. It reminded him of why they were there in the first place.
Robby put his other earbud in and spun on his heel, turning his back on Langdon and walking off anywhere but here. Anywhere where the air wasn't quite as thin, or the sun didn't shine quite as bright, a place where he'd be allowed to drown in the shade.
He'd much rather be swallowed whole than stomach seeing Langdon. Not like this, at least.
idc for an argument, this strictly my opinion as an addict
a lot of ppl say their critique of langdon has nothing to do with his addiction, only his actions, but that's directly ignoring the fact that his actions were influenced by drugs and addiction. you literally cannot separate the two.
as an addict, that makes it abundantly clear to me that you will not be able to see past my addiction and how that influenced my actions during active addiction, even once i'm sober. addiction makes you do fucked up things because it is by definition chemically altering your brain. you are simply not you.
does this mean that an addict's poor behaviour is acceptable? not at all and it is the victim of that behaviour's choice to forgive or not. but we are not victims of langdon's actions, we are people watching a tv show. i know very well how the actions of a fictional character can be triggering, but it is your job as an audience member to exercise critical thinking and consider the nuance of the situations you are seeing on screen.
ignoring langdon's addiction when critiquing his behaviour in season 1 is ignoring your own personal biases against addicts. you don't have to like his character, but if you have a vitriolic hatred for him i would ask you to sit with that and deconstruct why. if you're capable of understanding the nuances of other characters, but not his that is something you should look inward about
Remember when joining fandom as a younger person meant lurking for a bit and figuring out the vibe and etiquette instead of coming in on day one and calling people weirdos for liking weirdo shit in the weirdo factory.
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