TVSTRANGERTHINGS
we're not kids anymore.
sheepfilms

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

Kiana Khansmith
taylor price

Andulka
No title available
almost home

tannertan36

⁂

if i look back, i am lost
Peter Solarz
cherry valley forever

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
RMH
Game of Thrones Daily
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda

pixel skylines
Cosimo Galluzzi
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@iambecome
Well THIS unearthed some memories.
God I had the biggest crush on her.
Hey Berserk Tumblr
Last year when lockdown started I was trying to get my friend to read the manga. He said he prefers anime, so I recommended the 97 anime before realizing it was good but had some major problems, most especially a very bad dub in the final episodes. So I got the crazy idea to rip the entire series and re-dub that voice.
And so, the Arthouse 1997 Berserk Fan Edit was born.
What started as a small project ended up being a 4 month long endeavor, wherein I executed the following changes:
24 episodes –> 12 episodes, each with an average length of about 40 minutes, because it’s 2021 and this is what the people want now.
Removal of evil Queen/assassination subplot, because it ran long and I personally think its dumb. Sorry. Bad opinion, but I do. I do miss the conversation between Guts and Griffith afterwards but oh well, needs must.
Removal of the attack on Rickerts group, because it makes no sense in the anime and undercuts the next event.
Removal and/or Frankensteining of some minor battles to streamline the narrative.
Take your grasses off, folks! I changed the OP to be the 97 TV trailer to better match the tone.
Redub of old woman using the movie dub voice, with associated stealth edits so it makes sense.
Bit of additional BGM (all still Hirasawa) and additional SFX (particularly during Eclipse and Zodd)
Redraw of a couple still frames that were wonky, as well as some stealth edits to cover up weird, jarring drops in animation quality.
Lots and lots of minor edits during battle scenes, such as slowing or speeding animation, zooming, recutting dialogue etc. to make fights more fast paced (particularly Caska).
I drew in the dicks they censored. Our boys go full frontal!
Now this was just done for my own enjoyment, but after Miura’s untimely death last year I decided to share it.
Any interest here? Any takers? Anyone wanna check it out? Its not perfect, there was only so much I could do, but I promise its good. I mean… its basically the same thing as before, only now its better. Trim the fat, deepen the flavor- you got yourself a stew!
The link is here: LINK
FYI this kind of file sharing is buku illegal in my country, so upload may disappear at a moments notice! Download is OK though idgaf.
@profanedaisy
Hogwarts Holidays at The Burrow & Malfoy Manor 🥂🪶🍂
Digital vs. Traditional Art, Re: Berserk
Today I went to the 30th Anniversary Berserk Exhibition in Hirakata Park. Im planning on making a longer post with some photos and some other things to talk about the exhibit as a whole (spoiler: it was awesome).
The exhibit was about 20% elaborate plastic models and replicas (which we were allowed to photograph) and 80% original manga panel drawings (which we were not allowed to photograph). Seeing the original panels in person was amazing, and also quite surprising.
The main thing that surprised me was the number of materials used. Miura is known for his beautiful, dynamic art, but it was only upon seeing it in person that the creation of these pieces went far beyond just drawing something well or creatively. Black and white ink was utilized, as well as white out and deleter sheets. He also used large, thick black pens, graphite pencil (especially when drawing Griffith, who appeared to be uninked in several final versions to give him that ethereal, angelic quality), and a number of different sizes of pen, even when drawing a single figure. His drawings werent just linework-- it was highly textured. One of the most brilliant things he did was use ink splatter-- which, in person, you can clearly see is literally just ink splattered from a pen-- in order to project an image of something being dirty or chaotic, such as in fight or battle scenes.
Its a whole ecosystem in there, is what I’m trying to say.
This all begins to change though some time after the eclipse, right around the end of the Conviction Arc.
Now, this is just my personal opinion but, after the Conviction Arc it always felt like the story sort of... fell off. It wasnt that it god bad, but there was just something that wasnt the same. It began to feel less like an earth shattering fantasy epic and more like... just a regular anime.
Many people attributed this to Miura growing older, his interests shifting, or studio pressure. I, however, have a different theory-- I believe it was due to the shift in digital art.
You can see in the artwork once Miura begins to do more digital rather than analog pieces that there is a certain degree of restraint which you dont find it earlier works. Character linework becomes crisp and defined. Miura’s dynamic cross hatching is replaced with more standard shading techniques. You can see this in the manga too, but when faced with it in person the difference is incredibly striking.
ANALOG
DIGITAL
I had believed for a long time that maybe his style was just changing. He just had different interests. Then, however, I got to the end where they had an interview with him, filmed a few months before his death.
In the interview they ask him if he prefers digital or analog art, and he has a very surprising answer. I was not allowed to record, so I cant say it in entirety, but he is very eager to descibe analog drawing as “like calligraphy”.
As he describes his process in analog drawing, he mentions several times that it is a process that relies almost entirely on creative flow. You begin a piece with an idea, and then let the pen and page carry you to the final work. He describes how it was “extremely fun, but difficult for others” because when drawing analog, he may decide to change a scene entirely or a perspective. It was an organic process.
Digital, however, he describes as “synthesizing”-- he seems to enjoy doing digital work, but he mentions how it gives you the ability to go into very deep detail. It allows you to plan out your work, change it and mold it. It also allows you to work more closely with others, delivering a cleaner yet more studied product.
He did not state a preference. Perhaps he never had a preference.
But after watching that interview and looking at the work in the hall, I began to wonder about the story of Berserk. How it began to feel formulaic and somewhat dry. It was less dark and dreary of course, but it also just didnt seem to flow the same way that it had before.
It is only a theory. It can only be a theory I guess, I doubt even Miura himself would know if he could say. But after seeing what I saw, I now attribute this to the shift to digital. Once the work became digital, it stopped being just an exercise in free flowing creativity, and instead became something synthesized, planned, and heavily managed.
Earlier panels in Berserk may not look as polished. They have a chaos to them that can sometimes make it hard to follow with your eyes, and the amount of black, dark ink used fills the page to sometimes make things near unrecognizable.
But... I dont know. I think that’s sort of a part of the whole thing. Miura was a visual story teller first and foremost. Moving to digital-- in my opinion-- removed much of that artistic agency and creative flow, and for that-- again, in my opinion-- the story (and the art) suffered.
He did, at least, still seem quite happy. I dont mind if I dont like some of the last chapters. I just hope he enjoyed making them.
Amon: Devilman Mokushiroku (1999)
Mel Medarda, from Arcane
Her design was calling my name 😍
Im down so fucking bad dude
The way the creators of the series showed Jinx deserves special attention. They didn’t romanticize her mental illness and didn’t make her just a reckless-fearless-funny-dangerous shooter. They showed us how terrifying it is to go crazy and how hard it is to live when the real you is slowly dying under the weight of loss and pain
One of my friends brought up Harley Quinn and the similarities and while I cannot deny an aesthetic similarity, the way these two characters and their mental illness was portrayed is absolute night and day.
So often these “wildcard” characters are mentally ill in aesthetic only– they’re fun and loud and dress in bright colors! They carry big guns that sometimes shoot you, but sometimes just do a little flag that goes ‘bang’! They have voices in their heads!
What they dont do though is completely ruin everything your protagonists were working towards. They dont show them alienating themselves from and being alienated by the people closest to them because they’re a dangerous liability. They dont show how sometimes that recklessness gets people– even themselves– killed.
And god I just loved it that they went there with this. Because Jinx is fun! She does wear the bright colors and have killer style and funny weapons that go boom. You like her, and she isnt a perpetual bummer when shes on screen.
But youre also afraid of her. Youre afraid of what she might do or say, to herself or others. You dont know if this bomb is going to be a fun color show or if its going to tear another character you love to shreds. You dont know if shes going to be a little kooky today or if shes going to cry and sob and humiliate herself.
Not only was showing this dark side important for representation issues, it also just makes for such a better story! So much of the tension in this story is related to whether or not Vi is willing to stay and help Jinx, or whether Silco is going to betray her like he does everyone else– making Jinx someone who is truly, honestly difficult to love and have in your life makes it that much more intense. Because like, you– as the audience– love Jinx. You dont ever want her to change. But you also want her to just stop. And you dont know if she ever will.
This show was so good. Its just so, so good.
My similarities to the character of Draco Malfoy continue to upset and disturb me. Particularly in the context of Drarry fic, to which I am horribly addicted (to the point I need to moderate my consumption of it aggressively).
I grew up with money. Not *estate* money, but money. I grew up with privilege. I grew up an only child in a white family with 10,000 toys and infinite praise and adoration. "You'll do great things" and "You're so special" and "They're just jealous of you."
When I was in middle school I began to abruptly learn I was not actually special. Lots of people didn't like me, because I assumed superiority to them. I never bullied, I was too fragile-- after the initial shock of rejection my self esteem plummeted. I didn't have the courage to be a bully, but I certainly thought mean things. Cruel, jealous, awful things.
My parents loved me, but growing up, I've learned they were bad people. They fought often. I was terrified of them. I listened to my father scream racist slurs at a man who owed him money. I watched my family abandon and abuse my cousin because of her learning disability. Watched another cousin abuse her pets. Watch my mother convince herself she does good at her job while she helps the wealthiest people launder their money through 'charity' and false pretense and politics. I hated it, hated my family, but I was too much of a coward to do anything. Still am.
When I was 16 I met a girl. She was very similar to me, but almost opposites in other ways. She was beautiful in the way I wanted to be beautiful: middle eastern, dark hair and features, big beautiful eyes. She was smart, later on went to an Ivy while I failed out of a low rank state school. And worst of all, she was *kind*. She wants pretentious, even though she had every right to be. She worked hard. She treated people well, even me.
Everyone loved her. *I* loved her, though I couldn't understand that at the time (I was very gay and, brilliantly, wonderfully homophobic).
And when I was 16 and a half I got horrifically drunk on a trip with my friends, and her, and I lost my mind. I threatened to kill myself. I had to be restrained. My self hatred had metastisized.
I wasn't the only cruel one-- my "friends" pushed me away for my breakdown, called me crazy. A year later I would finally be able to socialize with them again, only to end up publicly raped for the amusement of my peers. It was a lot. Broke me, in all sorts of ways. But, you know, life isn't a book. I know I'm not just a villain, nor just a victim. No bit a hero, but at least by now I've attained a bit of quiet neutrality.
Anyway. I guess I just find it funny. It took me years to identify why I loved Drarry stories so much. I don't even like Harry Potter, barely finished the books, can't stand the films. Couldn't even read them as a kid because I was too "triggered" by how heavily I related to the Dursleys, the Malfoys, the villains-- big and ugly and selfish.
Now though, at 30, things are becoming a bit more clear. It's me. I'm not as pretty as people write Draco, and that girl from school is a little less heroic than Harry (though not by much). And these stories are, to me, stories of my life-- if everything had worked out. If it had come together. If I had done something better, if she had noticed me more, if I hadn't lost my mind that night, if if if
It's all a bit sick really lol.
Fun bonus question: did my fixation on this relationship drive my obsession with Drarry fics, or did the Drarry fics cause me to emphasize these memories more than I would have otherwise?
Bit of both maybe.
My similarities to the character of Draco Malfoy continue to upset and disturb me. Particularly in the context of Drarry fic, to which I am horribly addicted (to the point I need to moderate my consumption of it aggressively).
I grew up with money. Not *estate* money, but money. I grew up with privilege. I grew up an only child in a white family with 10,000 toys and infinite praise and adoration. "You'll do great things" and "You're so special" and "They're just jealous of you."
When I was in middle school I began to abruptly learn I was not actually special. Lots of people didn't like me, because I assumed superiority to them. I never bullied, I was too fragile-- after the initial shock of rejection my self esteem plummeted. I didn't have the courage to be a bully, but I certainly thought mean things. Cruel, jealous, awful things.
My parents loved me, but growing up, I've learned they were bad people. They fought often. I was terrified of them. I listened to my father scream racist slurs at a man who owed him money. I watched my family abandon and abuse my cousin because of her learning disability. Watched another cousin abuse her pets. Watch my mother convince herself she does good at her job while she helps the wealthiest people launder their money through 'charity' and false pretense and politics. I hated it, hated my family, but I was too much of a coward to do anything. Still am.
When I was 16 I met a girl. She was very similar to me, but almost opposites in other ways. She was beautiful in the way I wanted to be beautiful: middle eastern, dark hair and features, big beautiful eyes. She was smart, later on went to an Ivy while I failed out of a low rank state school. And worst of all, she was *kind*. She wants pretentious, even though she had every right to be. She worked hard. She treated people well, even me.
Everyone loved her. *I* loved her, though I couldn't understand that at the time (I was very gay and, brilliantly, wonderfully homophobic).
And when I was 16 and a half I got horrifically drunk on a trip with my friends, and her, and I lost my mind. I threatened to kill myself. I had to be restrained. My self hatred had metastisized.
I wasn't the only cruel one-- my "friends" pushed me away for my breakdown, called me crazy. A year later I would finally be able to socialize with them again, only to end up publicly raped for the amusement of my peers. It was a lot. Broke me, in all sorts of ways. But, you know, life isn't a book. I know I'm not just a villain, nor just a victim. No bit a hero, but at least by now I've attained a bit of quiet neutrality.
Anyway. I guess I just find it funny. It took me years to identify why I loved Drarry stories so much. I don't even like Harry Potter, barely finished the books, can't stand the films. Couldn't even read them as a kid because I was too "triggered" by how heavily I related to the Dursleys, the Malfoys, the villains-- big and ugly and selfish.
Now though, at 30, things are becoming a bit more clear. It's me. I'm not as pretty as people write Draco, and that girl from school is a little less heroic than Harry (though not by much). But these stories are, to me, stories of my life-- if everything had worked out. If it had come together. If I had done something better, if she had noticed me more, if I hadn't lost my mind that night, if if if
Along with developing a deep love of these stories, I still wonder about her. Often. Too often, really. I haven't seen her in years, but I have her on social media, check her stories, get excited when she checks mine. Have spent many a night writing something out to her only never to send it.
It's all a bit sick really lol.
Ask Polly: How Am I Supposed to Make Friends in My Late 20s?
The Duel. Berserk: The Golden Age Arc (2012)
it's so important for your health and well-being to get overly attached to a fictional man who is both deeply amoral and unbelievably, pathetically sad
If I had a nickel for every time I thought of running away and living in places like this,
I would have had enough money to actually go there.
-Asena Rawlin
It’s dark because you are trying too hard. Lightly child, lightly. Learn to do everything lightly. Yes, feel lightly even though you’re feeling deeply.
Just lightly let things happen and lightly cope with them. Lightly, lightly— it’s the best advice ever given me. So throw away your baggage and go forward.
There are quicksands all about you, sucking at your feet, trying to suck you down into fear and self-pity and despair. That’s why you must walk so lightly.
aldous huxley
never underestimate the power of telling yourself ‘woah calm down there edge lord’ every once in a while