hi guys, I know it’s been a whiiiiile since I've been on here. but the truth is my life has been so busy lately that I haven’t been able to keep up with bts or just kpop in general. I have honestly just been so caught up with life that i just can’t write anymore, it was either I hadn’t had the time or I haven’t had the motivation, which well and truly breaks my heart because I genuinely loved writing.
In the scarce moments I do have time I can’t write for some reason. I used to have such great ideas for story lines but now I seem to not have any; and the few good ideas or the plans I eventually make, never seem to go well in the process of actually writing them.
Also tumblr for me has become a very different place, I started as an avid reader of fictions and the writers I really loved have deactivated or have left their accounts. Not to say there isn’t still amazing writers on this platform, I'm sure there are an abundance of great fictions and my inbox is open for recommendations haha. But the writers who have inspired me are gone which makes me really sad lol.
I’ve consulted my best friend who tbh has helped a lot of the behind the scenes of every single one of my fictions as my editor etc.., and she’s agreed to co-manage this account and honestly speaking may even take over hahaha. You guys will love her honestly. I’ll pop in from time to time to see what's up. Thank you guys for everything, it’s been a great :) I appreciate every single one of you <3 I love you guys so much.
i know it’s been a while, but basically, i wanted to come back and start writing again but i can’t access tumblr on my phone and can only do it through my really sucky laptop that doesn’t work half the time :((( life’s been pretty bad but i think i’m properly going to come off hiatus in a month, so please anticipate and please don’t let it flop lol <3 i have lots ideas for new fics and hope y’all will be there to support them. leave requests in my inbox if you want. love you all
Can 2018 be the end of fanwars? The end of comparison of groups? The end of hate altogether?
This should be a reminder that it doesn’t matter who has more daesangs on display. It doesn’t matter if your faves are popular or not. It doesn’t matter. None of it does.
What matters is love. Support. Kindness.
What matters is that our idols are human too. They feel sadness, lonlieness, and worthlessness as well as happiness and laughter. They can be in a stadium with 20,000 people yet feel alone standing on that stage with their members; their fans right in front of them.
going to be off tumblr until somewhere in the new year, i want to stop seeing stuff about jonghyun... i know that's really selfish of me, but i can't stop crying and it's setting me on a relapse again. jonghyun and others in the kpop industry helped me through my clinical depression and it hurt that he lost his battle to his... it's so unfair... mental health needs to be taken SERIOUSLY if anyone even thinks about mocking the whole situation don't expect anything other than getting blocked. i love you guys and stay strong, message your friends if you are unhappy or aren't coping well with the situation. if any of you need someone to talk to @kpop-reads zoie is one of the best people to talk to about anything. she genuinely cares about all of you, just as i do. i love you guys, take care, merry christmas and see you in the new year 💙💙💙 all my love, -E
shinee is one of my fave groups. my heart hurts. sm haven't confirmed yet, but i don't think it's a joke. we lost another one to depression. guys please take care of your mental health. 💙
You forgot him, but he never forgot you. Every life he had, he spent it looking for you. Now, he’s found you. Only one problem… You were engaged.
➳ Temptation : bad boy!au
Reader x Taehyung
You had always hated him. Kim Taehyung - the boy who had everything he would ever need. He was always one to break the rules to get what he wanted. So what happens when he wants you at the point where you’re just about to leave.
➳ Yours Truly : first love!au
Reader x Seokjin
He needed to debut and you were in his way… you had to leave. You wrote to him everyday for a year until you gave up. Why didn’t he write back? It was because all the letters were kept hidden and forgotten about, and years later those letters still never reached him… until today.
YOU LIVE IN ENGLAND TOO!? WHAT DID YOU TAKE FOR YOUR GCSE'S AND A LEVELS?
for gcse's i took japanese, drama, resistant materials and business studies as my options and did the core maths, english, science and religious education. for a levels i did english lit, maths and psychology:) i live in london so hmu if you're close ;p
Feedback is honestly what i live for, it makes me know what you thought about any of my writings, what i could improve on, if you found it confusing i can explain anything etc... all kinds of criticism and feedback is appreciated, i don't mind how ruthless it is haha lmao but basically yeah, send your reviews and comments to my inbox 💗💗 also let me know what you guys want next, other requests are open ;PPP
genre: angst. then fluff. then smut. in. that. order.
summary: THE FINALE OF THIS BLOODY SERIES. I ACTUALLY COMPLETED A SERIES GUYS WTF.
word count: 4k LMAO (specifics: 3,941)
warnings/triggers: the usual, swearing, smut... blah
y/n pov
You turned to look at the house, a weird feeling came over you. You hated looking at the stupid brickwork… but it was almost like something was compelling you to go in. Before you knew it, you were unbuckling your seat belt.
“Woah y/n are you going in?” Hana asked, making you halt your movements to look at her.
You couldn’t explain it. You wanted to; how suddenly you were finding it hard to breathe, how a growing anxiousness settled in your stomach, how fast your heart was beating to the point where it felt like it was about to explode right out of your chest.
You swallowed thickly, trying to contain yourself even though you wanted nothing more than to burst out of the car and sprint to the house to hush that growing gnawing nauseous feeling taking a hold of your whole body.
“Shit, y/n are you okay? You look like you’re going to be sick.”
You think you nodded back to her, or at least you tried to. Your head began to swirl. You muttered an incoherent ‘excuse me’ before scrambling for the door handle before violently throwing it open for air.
“Watch it, you whore.”
You looked up to see Minah stare you down, tutting before she continued walking. You felt the blood drain from your face. You ignored Hana’s taunts, slagging Minah off from her rolled down window. All that echoed through your mind was: Jimin’s in there. You looked up to the window of his room. two figures. It’s not Minah… It was only when one started to back away you realized who it was: Jungkook. You stumbled forward onto the pavement, ignoring Hana’s protests.
“I’ll be back.” You shout back to her, not bothering to look back as you rush through their driveway and hastily kick aside their doormat for their spare key. You shoved the door open. You already felt sick, your rushed and sloppy movement made you want to heave. Your head spun as you trudged up the stairs, bracing the banister throughout.
You fell to your knees on the landing, your heart was beating in your ears. Your breaths became shallow, was this a panic attack?
“You want the truth kook...,” Jimin’s voice.
Your ears perked up, truth? what? what is he going on about...
“I love y/n. but, the way I look at her, i-it’s the same way she looks at you… And the only way to make her yours… was to get Minah out of the equation.” You were struggling to comprehend his words, not with the pounding that was going on inside your head. He sacrificed his own happiness so you could be with Jungkook. He did it all, he defended you, he made you feel better, he took away minah… all for you. How could he? Why would he do that? Christ sake Jimin… I don’t deserve you. It took a lot of the fading strength you had to get up off of the floor. What was wrong with you? You felt like you were swallowing air. You really should tell someone about what was going on, but you wanted to speak to him more than anything; tell him he shouldn’t have put you first, how he matters as much to you as you do him and he deserves his own happy ending just as much as you did.
“Pathetic, I know… But her happiness matters more than mine.”
And that’s when you couldn’t take it anymore.
“You don’t get to decide that.” You spit, a quiver in your voice.
“y/n… what are you doing he-”
“No.” You seethed. “You. What are you doing. How dare you put me first. How dare you let you do that for something like me. Something so problematic and fucked up. Why do you think you can go and do something like that. Do you think you’re noble, pulling that shit. Do you think you’ve helped me? Solved everything? Think again. I was left confused and a drunken fucking mess on my bedroom floor.” You ignored all the pain growing in your head. You wanted to scream at him more. “WAS I SUPPOSED TO JUST GET IT!? I REALLY LIKED YOU JIMIN. I REALLY DID-”
“y/n, slow down, you look pale, sit-” Jungkook interrupted rising off the floor to grab your wrist.
“AND YOU. HE DIDN’T HAVE TO GO THROUGH ALL OF THIS IF YOU HAD JUST LEFT MINAH ALONE. WAS I NOT GOOD ENOUGH. YOU’RE JUST LIKE HIM.” You’re head flitted between the two. You felt like you were spinning, everything was a sudden blur, their faces, the room, the lights. “YOU’RE JUST AS WORSE AS EACH OTHER!” you finally burst out with everything left in you, like a final breath before falling to the ground before them.
-
Your eyes fluttered open, a gasp escaped your mouth as you forced yourself upright. You had to shield your eyes from the bright lights around you.
“Woah, woah, slow down y/n. You just had a panic attack you don’t need another one.”
It took you a while to figure out you were in a hospital bed. Hana’s hand squeezed at yours, minding the IV needle buried in the centre of the back of your hand.
“God? Is that you?” You joked, as you over-dramatically laid back down, eyes shut and the back of your other hand on your forehead.
“Nope. Satan. Welcome to hell bitch.”
You both laughed. You loved having her a best friend. She never left your side, even through all the crap you were dealing with Jung- wait. It was then you finally remembered why you were lying in a hospital bed in the first place…
“What’s wrong?” Hana asked, noticing that a sadness weaved its way into your eyes. “You know it astounds me how quickly you can change moods… it’s like pms to the extreme…” and of course it made you laugh.
“Where’s...er...how’s Jungkook and Jimin…” you mumbled, feeling stupid and selfish to ask the damn question.
“Ask them yourselves, they’ve waited outside all night. I seriously don’t think any of the two slept with how worried they were…” She sighed, a look of concern in her eyes as she sunk into her chair, folding her arms.
“Did they not want to come in…” you mumbled, thinking about the way you acted last night. an ugly side of you came out, and it was so unfair to them… you took your frustration out on them and that was a dick move.
“No, not at all…” Hana replied, making relief wash over your body, “they thought after what you said that the two should give you some space.”
“Oh.” you sigh. hana notices the tiniest downturn of the corners of your mouth.
“Do you want to talk to them?”
were you ready to? it was when you were about to respond, your ears perked at the sound of the door handle turning, and within milliseconds you were laying back down, eyes screwed trying to look asleep whilst also trying to calm the quick beating of your heart. yep. definitely not ready…
“I hoped she’d be awake by now.”
It was Jungkook’s voice, it took all of your strength to keep your eyes shut. your heart sank at the worry, concern, and guilt laced in his voice.
“She just needs a little rest, but she’ll be okay.” Hana lied, subtly kicking the underside of your bed as if to say ‘i can’t believe you're making me lie like this’
though your eyes were shut, you could feel his look linger on your still body. you heard him sigh.
“I have to go to work, my ass of a boss won’t let me stay cause no one can cover…” the tone of his voice had your heart wrenching with guilt. “I'll come straight back as soon as I can like if I go early he might let me out early, I'm not really sure when I'll come back unless she gets discharged, then I'll meet you wherev-” he paused, realizing his rambling “just… text me… please.” he sighed; and it felt like a stab to the heart, especially hearing his steps out the door.
Your eyes opened instantly, and you put a shaky hand on your chest, feeling the racing pulse of your heart. Your eyes lock with Hana’s, an eyebrow raised and a look to say ‘really y/n.’
“You know you can’t just avoid them. this. whatever the fuck you want to call this situation.” she huffed, folding her arms tighter together.
You bite your lip, “I know. I know. It’s just embarrassing…I still can’t believe I just passed out like that.”
“it’s not,” Hana insisted “you’re just a fragile thing that just got overwhelmed.” Her hand squeezing against your arm, hoping you’d believe her. you got so caught up in her words, you didn’t realize the sound of the door handle.
“I’m going to get som- y/n you’re up. Are you feeling okay?” Jimin’s words were heavy, embarrassment and guilt made it’s way to your stomach as you caught his eyes, concern ringing clear in his irises.
“I’ll give you guys some space.” Hana awkwardly sighed before shuffling out of the room.
A forced smile came over your lips at him, as you were finally alone. You were still feeling terrible about the things you said last night. He smiles genuinely at you as he perches at the foot of your hospital bed, you shuffle up resting your back against the wall.
“I’m so sorry.” You manage to finally say. You didn’t have to look at him to know he was still smiling, you couldn’t look at him, you were still so embarrassed.
“Don’t be.” He says, reaching out his arm to tilt your head up to look at him. You lean into his palm. The comfort of the pad of his thumb skimming across your cheekbones had tears beginning to form at the corners of your eyes.
“But I am,” You sniff “All you’ve ever done was put me first and I screamed at you for it… That was such as shitty thing to do Jimin and I'm so sorry.” Tears were now free-falling, Jimin tried his best to wipe them before they began to collect and fall on your hospital gown. Even after screaming at him and not reciprocating his feelings, he still doing all of this for you. You really didn’t deserve this kind of forgiveness. You really didn’t deserve him.
“Jimin…” You looked at him, through wet lashes “I love you. You know that. But you need- you deserve someone who can give all their heart to you without any hesitation. I don’t want to hurt you… well, more than what I've already put you through-”
He stops you, pulling you into a hug.
“It’s okay.” He whispers, patting your back, as you grip him tightly, trying your absolute best not to start bawling in his embrace. He lays a chaste kiss on your forehead before releasing you. His hand weaves together with yours. “I wanted this to happen, remember… You and Kook… I promise. I’m happy as long as you are.” His smile falters, but only a little. “I’m not going to lie and say that it doesn’t hurt…” he sighs. He squeezes your hand “But I'll be fine. I promise.”
You both share a real smile. The smile reaches his eyes, in a way that you could feel the genuiness flowing from his words. You were so grateful for him and loved how you can trust that what happened over the past few days, would ever change the relationship you had with him.
“What about you and kook?” You ask carefully, given what you had just talked about.
“We had all night in the hallway to talk it out…” he laughed, making you smile again.
~
Jungkook pov
The two were waiting anxiously outside. It was never easy waiting eagerly outside a hospital room. With it’s clinical white walls that made every small sound echo, the uneasy chatter of others scurrying and pacing around them, as they sat on the seats right outside of your room. Jungkook began to gnaw on his bottom lip, still feeling the tension between him and Jimin who instead was sitting and tapping his feet nervously, was leaning by the closed door, with his head turning every so often looking everywhere but at him. He stared at Jimin, swallowing before mustering up the courage to say something, they had been best friends since they can remember, so it shouldn’t be this hard…
“Did you mean it?” jungkook asked, jimin’s head instantly turned to him.
“What?”
“What you said earlier… about doing it all for y/n.”
“No.” He deadpans, turning back at looking at the wall in front of him. Jungkook’s heart drops.
“What?” He barely gets out without stuttering.
“I did it for you too” Jimin replies, with a cheeky smile.
“Hyung…” Jungkook can’t help but sighs back in relief. “Don’t scare me like that.”
“Sorry.” he laughs back.
“I still can’t believe you would do that though…” The youngest yawns.
“Me neither...” Jimin sighs, before slowly walking to where Jungkook was and joining in sitting beside him, “...I think the words you’re looking for is ‘thanks for gracefully bowing out’, so say it before I realize how much I don’t want to let y/n go.”
“Thank you for gracefully bowing out” Jungkook complies with a smile. He felt good knowing that they were back in sync with joking around with each other. They both laugh silently knowing they’re okay again. Jungkook yawns again, the tiredness and the events of tonight he had been fighting was finally catching up to him.
“Go to sleep. This is like your eighth time yawning. I’ll wake you up if anything happens to y/n.” Jimin fake scolds, offering his shoulder to him.
Jungkook takes it, resting his head on the older’s shoulder adding a final “thanks” as he get’s comfy.
“The things I do for you.” He hears Jimin sigh, making him smile as his heavy lids take over
~
“And Minah?”, you ask with another awkward smile.
“I told her everything.” He sighs, leaning back into his chair, “She took it better than I expected… nothing got broken but she did scream and curse me out in front of the whole hospital cafe…”
You couldn’t help but laugh, you could easily imagine the scene… classic Minah. He smiles at you after laughing with you too, “You’re still in my life that’s all that matters.”
You take his hand in yours, and looked him in the eyes,
“always” you whisper.
The sound of the door flying open causes you to jump, grabbing hold of Jimin’s hand tighter subconsciously.
“I managed to cancel my-” Jungkook blurts but stops in his tracks as he focuses on the scene in front of him, you follow his eyes to your’s and jimin’s hands, “am I interrupting something… sorry.” he flusteredly gets out, a frown toying with his face as he turns back.
Jimin squeezes your hand before getting up, “Nope, but you guys probably have a lot to catch up on...”
Jungkook just stands there as he watches Jimin walk out and shut the door behind him. His mouth feels dry, and his thoughts have completely left him. He feels as if he lost his shot, but it’s Jimin so he should be happy. Before you get to say anything, he comes bursts out first,
“If you chose him it’s okay like honestly, it’s up to you, I'll be okay, like you don’t have to explain anything, you guys are my best friends, and I shouldn’t be anything but supportive because you guys are happy so it’s totally fine-”
Your sudden fit of hysteria at his cute rambling he always does when he doesn’t want to cry or is flustered - stops him in his tracks.
“Oh god,” you sigh wiping away tears that left your eyes from laughing too much. “It’s me and you kook.” you finally say looking at him dead straight through your glossy eyes.
“Really?” he asks, you didn’t know whether he was surprised or excited but it made you smile. “But you and Jimin…”
“We talked and it made me realise things.” You slowly say tracing the back of Jungkook's hand, swirling your fingertips over his knuckles gently; quite like Jimin had moments ago to you.
“Like?” he asks fast. You smile at the eagerness that caught the end of your sentence.
“You sound worried.” You laugh
He smiles sheepishly but genuinely. “Should I be?”
“Not at all.” you say running a hand through his tangled hair, messed up and moulded whilst sleeping on Jimin’s shoulder “You guys talked it out too, right? at least that's what Jimin told me.”
“Yeah, but it was your call in the end.”
“I guess… but I've made it.” you smile, looking at him all openly heart eyes, like you had wanted to, for so long. He grins back and it felt so right with him, in that moment, it was ‘the end of the tunnel’ kind of moment that could only go with the darkness of the moments leading to right now.
A gentle knock sounds at the door and you hated the fact you had to break this moment.
“Come in.”
The nurse comes in, a sweet smile on her face and clipboard in hand.
“Miss y/n, how are we doing?” her soft voice asks
“Much better...,” you sigh, sneaking a peek at Jungkook, who returns a smile and squeezes your hand playfully “...thank you.”
“Well, you’re conscious again and your heart rate is back to normal…” she laughs “so it seems like you’re ready to be discharged, but if you feel as if things get worse, don’t be afraid to pop into here or your nearest clinic, alright.” she smiles to which you nod in reply.
“Thank you so much,” you say before she leaves you to your privacy.
“Ready to leave?” Jungkook says as he stands up from his chair, holding out a hand to you.
“Let’s.” you say as you steadily got to your feet, clinging onto Jungkook’s forearm, legs trembling as you stand, like a child ice skating for the first time and clinging to the sides of the rink.
“Woah, woah, woah, are you okay?” Jungkook asks concerned, as he hurriedly supports you with his body.
“I haven’t been up on my feet for hours kook,” You laugh as your legs adjust and regain stability “I promise I'm fine.” you smile before laying a kiss on his forehead for reassurance.
He wraps his arm around you the rest of the way “Just in case” he says. As you open the door, you’re met with familiar laughter bursting from Jimin and Hana, who were too wrapped up in conversation-well, hysteria- to notice you at the doorway.
“y/n!” Hana finally let’s out, finally realising your presence and the two come to greet you. You give a funny look to Hana, but she doesn’t register, you study them both instead... do they- ? “Are you ready to go?”
You look around to the three people who matter to you most surrounding you in smiles and the biggest grin comes over your face as you nod.
You wrap yourself in Jungkook’s arm as you all walk out together, Hana by your side, and Jimin by Jungkook. You were so thankful for them. You climb into the backseat, nuzzled up in Jungkook’s warmth, his hands grazing your arm, whilst Hana and Jimin bickered over what track get’s played next or who’s the better artist. It was in that moment where life just felt good again.
-
“Who voluntarily made butter popcorn when we had sweet?” You hear Hana ask from the kitchen as she pulls it out of the microwave. You finish putting on ‘Now you see me’ on Netflix.
“Sweet popcorn? Over butter? Are you dumb?” Jimin scoffs,
“Not as dumb as your taste receptors.” Hana snaps back,
“They are totally going to bang…” Namjoon mumbles as everyone else finds places to get comfy for movie night, or tries to, over Jimin and Hana’s strange way of flirting with each other...
“Namjoon!” Seokjin scolds “We’re all thinking it, but none of us said it.”
“Me and Hoseok already place bets on when it happens” Yoongi laughs as he high fives Hobi lowkey smiling whilst bringing a big blanket to cover the four sitting on the big sofa.
“I bet 10, on tonight.” Namjoon says, handing the note to Yoongi, shoving it into his pocket with the sweepstake money.
“Christ guys…” Jin mumbles, dropping his head into his hands.
You and Jungkook laugh, and you wrap the blankets tighter around your sofa, meaning Jimin and Hana had to sit next to each other.
“Can I bet too?” Jungkook whispers in your ears and you playfully smack him in the arm.
“Come on guys, movies coming on!” You call to the two in the kitchen, coming in with two different bowls of two different popcorn flavours with them.
They both spot the only seats left, look at each other, and look away.
“Jungkook move, that’s my seat.” Hana scolds, but you see the smile faltering in her words.
“Got to be faster next time.” Jungkook teases.
“Just sit,” Jimin sighs, flopping down on the couch across from you “Don’t flatter yourself thinking I'll make a move on you, I have standards”
She surrenders, taking the space next to him, “Coming from a guy who prefers butter popcorn, I don’t think you do~” She smiles, tugging her share of the blanket.
You laugh at them before pressing play on the remote.
The movie’s only half done by the time most people had nodded off. It only took Yoongi 10 minutes before he was gone - which for Yoongi was a record -with Yoongi’s soft hair against his face, it was only natural for Hoseok to be lulled to sleep, then Joon, then Jin, Hana tried to stay up, but couldn’t fight the sleep, she had already watched this movie like three times, Jimin was about to fall asleep but was startled awake when Hana’s head fell on his shoulder, he readjusted himself to make them both more comfortable before inevitably dosing off too.
You nudged Jungkook, who was actually watching the movie, his eyes followed yours, silently laughing as he scanned through the passed out bodies around you both,
“You sleepy too?” Jungkook whispered in your ear, to which you shook your head, “We have two options.” he continues, you turn and look at him bewildered. “We could stay and finish the movie…”, you raise a brow at him, “or…” at that point you feel his hand, caress over your ribs, under your sweater. You whip the blanket off, grab his wrist and drag him to the stairs, both of you cover your mouths to conceal the laughter as you try to tiptoe out of the living room and up the stairs.
Once you two even reach the door frame to his room, you latch together, with needy kisses and hungry hands. He rids you of your sweater and you follow, throwing his shirt somewhere on the floor, he peppers kisses on your neck, and they tickle a bit causing you to laugh. All of a sudden your eyes catch to the door you left completely open.
“Kook! The door.” you laugh embarrassed, gently pushing him off you. He jogs up to the door, slowly letting it shut and twists the lock.
“No chances this time…” He says, before his lust fuelled irises focus on you again “We’re not getting interrupted.”
a/n: GUYS WE DID IT, WE FINISHED A SERIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this is the first of many more to come, interrupted has been my second piece of writing on here and the fact it got so much love and support has really touched and inspired me to do more for you guys! i’ve already started on the next one hehehe and i promise the next one won’t take as long as this one did ... well at least i hope it doesn’t...
anyway again thank you so much for you patience, love and support; i love guys and as always:
I understand that you get a lot of questions about when (insert certain fic) is going to be updated or continued but that was kinda rude. It’s great that ou’re straight to the point about things and blunt but you could’ve just only said “Read my FAQ”
I think it’s an extremely polite and considerate thing of me to do to warn ppl that they’re in danger of getting blocked lmao. But ur right. Next time I’ll just block w/o warning 😘
GUYS MY WIFI HAS BEEN SHITTY ALL WEEK I'VE BEEN TRYING TO POST AND AM REALLY EXCITED TO DROP THIS BUT I LITERALLY AM HAVING 3 SECOND BURSTS OF GOOD WIFI EVERY 2 HOURS :(((((( I'M SORRY
