Nobody tosses a dwarf.

Aiswarya. 21. I suppose I should write something else here. Hello, general populace.

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

req’d by @is-this-a-username09876

oh big fucken PCOS mood from my end

[chrissongzzz]

ohh wow

[orpheusilver]

what the fuck

[klubbhead]

[sephezade]

Bitch I sat here and waited like a dumbass!

[mellowhero]

I high-key hate this so much

[kitty2i-blog]

[tindez]

Tommy: Oh… my… [cat meows, cougar hisses] T: Melanie Melanie: What, babe? T: Come here for a minute. [pause] Look at this. M: Oh my God T: Is that crazy or what? M: Where are the kids? T: They’re out back. M: [exclaimed] TOMMY ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! [cougar backs up, lowers ears, looks at camera] T: Shh- [chuckling] You’re gonna scare the cat. They’re still in bed, they’re still in bed, shi- M: That is not funny. You about gave me a heart attack. T: [laughing quietly] M: Are you kidding?

[st-coyote]

This has the opposite energy of that “Good Going Ron. What I’m not allowed to sneeze?” Video.

[lush-emerald-leaves]

Ancestor vs contemporary genetic fluff

[residentgoodgirl]

[tonystarkstan]

Vibe of the Captain Marvel trailer: LET’S GET THIS MOTHERFUCKIN’ BREAD, SHOW THESE BOYS HOW IT’S DONE, HELL YEAH

Vibe of the Endgame trailer: Depression is a black hole that allows no light in and also we’ll never know happiness again probably, but we’ll Do Our Best

[omniverin]

Captain Marvel : Who Runs the GIRLS!

Avengers End : Wake Me Up, I Can’t Wake Up, SAVE MEEE

[fairyling]

it’s actually evil that ppl wanna say that they support bi women but then as soon as a bi woman is dating a man & she wants to talk about her attraction she’s shut down in lgbt spaces bc no one wants to hear about het relationships. if you shut down bi ppl discussing their attraction to the opposite gender then you are not an ally to bi ppl & you never were

[fairyling]

i encourage you all to reblog this

[vicemag]

A quick tip for your elevator ride up to the office: grab a piping hot cuppa joe at the corner store and stick an egg in it to make a hard boiled morning snack.

[adriofthedead]

just stick your hands in boiling hot coffee. go on. do it. just shove your fingers on in that blistering hot cuppa joe. throw an egg in there. who gives a shit. eat your god damn coffee eggs like the stupid slobbering idiot that you are

[lacefuneral]

thIS WHOLE FUCKING ARTICLE

????????????????????????????

[cybercitrus]

convert your office into a horrible disaster

[sadopossum]

This should be what nsfw means

[itsthatunique]

“Are you finished?”

[homo-takino-deactivated20230203]

[com-humor]

it’s like these companies have finally gotten out of their wild college party years and are now trying to be mature adults now.

Same goes for the Windows logo

I mean look at this shit

Is like someone just ironed the logo

[timemachineyeah]

Random The Good Place Headcanon

Everyone else is saying fuck and being censored, but Chidi really is just saying “fork”.

[mad-march-hares-tea-party-deact]

Jason has forgotten that they’re being censored and has been saying fork because everyone else is saying fork

[swan2swan]

I just realized that Han never knew that Luke got his hand chopped off while he was in carbonite and I don’t know which path I want to follow with this information:

1. Han seeing Luke’s injured hand after the sail barge battle and thinking that Luke has been a robot the whole time

2. Luke shaking his hand with a super-firm grip and Han just thinking “Wow this kid has gotten…absurdly strong.”

3. Luke just pulls off his hand one day and throws it at Han.

4. Luke picks up a spacechicken carcass and crushes it with his bare hand and Han is intimidated

5. Han says “It’s good to see you’re all right” and then Luke says “well, actually…” and pulls off his hand and Han falls over the back of his chair

6. Han says “It’s good to see you’re all right” and everyone gasps and Leia says “Too soon!” and Han is confused and they all just rag on him

7. Han needs a battery and Luke just opens up his hand and pulls out a battery and gives it to him and Han just stares

8. Luke reappears after a mission with all the synthflesh off and Han says “I thought it was easy but you LOST YOUR HAND?” and Luke just says “Oh, no, I lost this before Endor” and Han is hurt and betrayed.

9. Luke keeps making hand puns and limb puns and raising his right hand to high-five Han and Han just never gets it

10. Luke excitedly tells Han as they’re waiting to be taken to the Sarlacc because it’s been a whole year that he’s wanted to tell the guy. 

[bloodyshadow1]

Luke and Chewy are playing a game it doesn’t matter what.  Han comes over and does the whole Wookies tear the arms off the people who beat them thing to try and tease Luke.  He doesn’t know that Chewy and Luke have been preparing for this though and after Luke ‘wins’ Chewy pretends to be mad and rips off Luke’s hand

[incorrect-into-the-spiderverse]

Miles, meeting Ham for the first time: Ok, but why do you sound like John Mulaney?

Ham: *Small chuckle as he moves towards Miles*

Ham: *Whispering into Miles’ ear* You shut your fucking mouth.

[fortunaveraluz]

[marinebiologyshitposts]

uh oh! it’s real univalve bedtime hours

[marinebiologyshitposts]

yawn…

[marinebiologyshitposts]

gedding sleepy…. … ……..

[marinebiologyshitposts]

zzz!

unconchious

[curlytoms-deactivated20191110]

I CANNOT BREATHEKDW THIS IS THE FUNNIEST SHIT IVE SEEN TODAY

[filmouts]

GEMMA CHAN @ 25th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards at The Shrine Auditorium on January 27, 2019 in Los Angeles, California.

[catchymemes]