The Laurens Twins

Independent & Private roleplay blog for original characters Jenna & Nova Laurens. Replies posted Tuesdays.

[idcnticxl]

independent & private multimuse blog for original character twin sisters Jenna & Nova Laurens with verses in stranger things, until dawn, 9-1-1, euphoria, umbrella academy, & more. Please read & follow rules before interacting. Replies posted Tuesdays.

—A STUDY IN; identity, grief, identical twins, similarities & differences, parental death, mental health, unhealthy coping mechanisms, & self discovery.

Carrd | Rules | Interest Tracker | Memes | Opens

[busyw0man]

⋆｡‧˚ʚ💋ɞ˚‧｡⋆ 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐞

❝ i don’t think anyone would notice if i disappeared. ❞

❝ it’s too quiet without you. ❞

❝ i’m surrounded, but i’ve never felt lonelier. ❞

❝ i don’t even know who to call anymore. ❞

❝ i wish someone would ask if i’m really okay. ❞

❝ it’s just me. it’s always just me. ❞

❝ i miss being someone’s favorite person. ❞

❝ i feel like a ghost in my own life. ❞

❝ even when i’m with people, i still feel alone. ❞

❝ nobody really sees me. not all the way. ❞

❝ i stopped reaching out. nobody noticed. ❞

❝ i talk to the walls more than i talk to people. ❞

❝ some nights, the silence feels like it’s screaming at me. ❞

❝ i pretend to be fine because i don’t want to be a burden. ❞

❝ i’m tired of being the one who always has to be okay. ❞

❝ i just want someone to stay. even if i don’t say anything. ❞

❝ it hurts to feel this forgotten. ❞

❝ maybe i’m meant to be alone. ❞

❝ i wish someone missed me the way i miss them. ❞

❝ when did i become so easy to leave behind? ❞

❝ i keep hoping someone will reach out, but they never do. ❞

❝ i don’t know how to ask for help anymore. ❞

❝ i’m not okay, but i don’t know how to say it without crying. ❞

❝ i’d give anything just to feel held right now. ❞

❝ sometimes, i just want someone to sit with me in the dark. ❞

❝ i wonder if anyone thinks about me when i’m not around. ❞

❝ i’m so tired of pretending to matter. ❞

❝ i miss the feeling of being wanted. ❞

❝ it feels like everyone outgrew me and forgot to tell me. ❞

❝ i wish someone would fight for me for once. ❞

❝ i didn’t think it was possible to feel this invisible. ❞

❝ i’m not okay. i haven’t been for a while. ❞

❝ why does it feel like i’m always the one left behind? ❞

❝ i’m not asking for much... just not to be forgotten. ❞

❝ it’s like i’m screaming, but no one can hear me. ❞

❝ i used to laugh without faking it. i miss that. ❞

❝ i miss who i was before the loneliness set in. ❞

❝ i wish someone would just hold me and mean it. ❞

[memepocalypse]

After Loss

They lost someone...

"The pain will ease, you know."

"We won't forget them. They'll still live in your heart."

"I know it's hard, but they wouldn't want you to shut yourself away."

"They loved you so, so much. Don't doubt that."

"It's okay to cry, it's okay to grieve."

"I didn't know, I'm... I'm so sorry."

"Oh, my God. When did that happen?"

"Grief... does strange things to people, I understand."

"Hey, come here. Come here, it's okay, it's okay..."

"I know you miss them, of course you do."

"It's normal to feel... empty."

"Don't rush the healing. It'll come, it just takes time."

"They loved you, so, so much."

"You can't let loss destroy you. It's not what they'd want."

"Take my hand, take a breath. It'll pass."

"It feels like there's this - wound in my chest that won't heal."

"I miss them, God, I miss them so much."

"Why did they have to go?"

"I'm empty. Where they used to be."

"I don't think it's ever going to stop hurting."

"They were there, and now they're gone, but how can they be gone?"

"How can a presence that big just - stop?"

"I didn't think they could ever be gone, couldn't imagine this... alone."

"They're gone. They're not. They can't - they're not."

"Every time I think I'm over it and then it just... starts hurting all over again..."

"Time. They say it takes... time."

"I want to... hear them. Talk to them."

"They understood me, really, truly."

"The world is emptier, and it will never be full again."

"I... wish you could understand..."

[lanternlit]

Yeah, when she puts it like that, he can’t really argue with it. Surviving a plane crash objectively sucks. Hurley himself, maybe he’s more chill than most of the survivors, with it all. For some reason. Not with whatever is in the jungle making noise at night, but he tries not to think about it. And then there’s the voice in his head that’s trying to tell him this is all his fault because of those numbers, but he works even harder to not think about that.

He sits down next to her on the wet sand and shifts the tarp so that it’s covering her. It occurs to him that she probably doesn’t want to be sitting inches apart from a grown-ass guy, though, so he ends up sheltering her with the tarp and sitting in the full blast of the rain, himself. It’s not like it makes any difference, but he wants to make the gesture anyways.

🙶Wait, who’s your celebrity crush? Charlie?🙷 Hurley asks. This is easier than to admit that he perhaps is a little worried she might walk into the ocean, as she put it.

[idcnticxl]

When the rain around her stopped she was a little surprised. Even more to find Hurley had draped a tarp over her shielding her and taking the brunt of the weather himself. Part of her had expected him to give up, to walk away, and leave her alone. After all that's what Jenna and quite frankly most of the survivors had done when she got snippy. The only people who bothered to continue to check in with her beyond that point was basically just Charlie, but also Dr. Sheppard had tried 'getting through to her' a few days prior.

Sweatered palms wiped the dripping rainwater off her face, not that it mattered much when the fabric itself was sopping wet. At Hurley's question meant to clarify what she had been talking about, she looked up at him, head lolling to the side as her chin rested on her knee. Hopefully the faint blush that she could feel come to her face would be mistaken for sunburn.

"I'm not twelve, and he's barely a celebrity anymore."

[lanternlit]

He’s on his feet, halfway to the other side of the TARDIS console to input coordinates, when she wakes up.

🙶Oh.🙷 He lingers for a second, fingers on buttons. Then makes his way to to her, the ship still not in motion. 🙶Bad dream?🙷

He grabs her by the forearm, gently, to pull her up on her feet. 🙶Safe and sound,🙷 he says, a little too lightly, as he lets go. Moving back to the console, he pushes a button to make the lights a little brighter. Not that the TARDIS console room is a familiar, safe space, for her, but it’s the best he can do. It feels so instinctively safe for him, too, the softly welcoming lights of the ship, the hum of the machinery. 🙶I was just about to get you home. Give me a few minutes and I’ll have you back in your own bed, say, just before midnight the day we left.🙷 He glances at her, trying to not show too much concern. She’s human; she’s young; nightmares happen, it doesn’t have to mean anything...

[idcnticxl]

Once she steadied, she abruptly pulled her forearm away just as the Doctor let go, and sniffled as held her arm close to her chest. Maybe it was rude, maybe it gave off the wrong vibe, like he had been too rough, or hurt her - he hadn't, obviously, but Nova gave no indication otherwise. She blinked blearily, as her eyes adjusted to the new lighting of the TARDIS and looked around the console room wiping her eyes with her sleeve once she turned away from the Doctor. She was still in disbelief honestly of just how something so big fit in such a tiny space. It felt almost magical, and judging by the hallway she looked down there was even more to the ship than she had thus far seen.

Unfortunately, the Doctor's next words pulled her back into reality. One trip. One trip as a thank you. That had been their agreement when he first took her on board. Of course he would end up taking her home. The thought of going home deflated her, and she shrugged at the suggestion they return her just before midnight on the day they left.

"You could drop me off three weeks later, not like anyone would notice." she grumbled. Okay, maybe a few teachers might, but no one actually important. She walked over quietly, looked down at all the various buttons and knobs and levers on the console. Feeling the Doctor's eyes on her, she spoke again, clearer this time. "Whatever's good for you though."

[idcnticxl]

Friendly reminder to check out my carrd & fill out my Interest Tracker if you haven't yet!

I will not follow back or write without the interest tracker.

[idcnticxl]

SEXUALITY / INTIMACY

is it easy for them to get turned on, or do they need emotional safety first?

It’s fairly easier to get Jenna turned on. She definitely craves that emotional safety more than she lets on.

do they separate sex and feelings, or blur them dangerously?

Jenna tends more often to separate sex. She blurred them dangerously once and it really bit her in the ass. 

what's an immediate turn-off for them?

Trying to hard, or having a lack of personality. Both are pretty bad in her book. 

Do they crave intensity or stability?

Jenna definitely craves stability more than she would like to admit to others. She definitely doesn’t struggle to fulfill any or of desire for intensity.

do they like being in control, or giving it up?

Jenna doesn’t really have a solid preference either way, it would depend on her day and her mood but most of all she’d just be willing to play to her partners desires. 

are they gentle with people they desire?

Again, depends on the partner.

how do they feel about their own body during intimacy?

Jenna feels good about her own body during intimacy. Depending on the partner she might feel a little more nervous but for the most party she has enough confidence. She knows what feels good for her and isn’t typically afraid to voice it.

what do they need to feel wanted?

To be openly, and shamelessly loved. She’s done the casual hook ups, the friends with benefits, the secret down low love affair before. In a relationship what she needs is follow through on the commitment. 

do they guard intimacy, or give it too freely?

She guards herself a bit, intimacy wise. Which might sound strange thing casual sex is such a thing for Jenna. But she definitely does play her cards close to her chest 

have they ever used sex to avoid something?

Oh for sure. 

[idcnticxl]

SEXUALITY / INTIMACY

is it easy for them to get turned on, or do they need emotional safety first?

In her teen years Nova leans more sex-averse but as she gets older she becomes more sex neutral. It’s not that easy for her to get turned on, and she is asexual. I don’t think she has sex in every verse, but in the ones where she does she definitely needs emotional safety before she makes the decision of “Yeah, I’d be comfortable doing this.” 

do they separate sex and feelings, or blur them dangerously?

Conceptually, theoretically, whatever you want to call it, Nova can definitely separate sex and emotion. But in practice, that’s not how she personally rolls. Casual/No Strings Attached sex is by no means her thing. 

what's an immediate turn-off for them?

Being pinned, or restrained. Nova has no illusions of what her weight class actually is, and she’s been through some stuff in her younger years that she’d rather not be reminded of. 

Do they crave intensity or stability?

 Nova wants to be able to love someone with her entire being, and be loved by someone with their entire being, which she would consider to be intense. But she also wants to be able to rely on her partner as well. She wouldn’t choose really one over the other. 

do they like being in control, or giving it up?

Based on her previous experiences in her younger years, Nova prefers to be in control. That’s not to say that she’d never play the other side and be the one giving it up, but that would require an immense amount of trust from her that would be reserved for very specific individuals. 

are they gentle with people they desire?

Yes. Nova is, largely, a very gentle person in general but she’s especially gentle with those that she is emotionally attached to.

 how do they feel about their own body during intimacy?

She has complex feelings about her body during intimacy. Nova is very used to concealing her body, not wanting to be noticed for it. So to go from that to being intimate with someone who wants to notice and see her body is a little on the uncomfortable side for her. 

what do they need to feel wanted?

Physical Touch and Words of Affirmation are a big thing to help Nova feel wanted. She doesn’t realize how much words of affirmation are a huge part of her love language, but she really does need that verbal confirmation of “I love you, I want you, and you are enough for me.” From those that she loves. 

do they guard intimacy, or give it too freely?

Nova is definitely a bit more guarded when it comes to intimacy. She doesn’t just let that guard down around anyone.

have they ever used sex to avoid something?

Nova does not typically use sex to avoid things. If she wants to avoid something she’ll find another way to do it. 

[idcnticxl]

independent & private multimuse blog for original character twin sisters Jenna & Nova Laurens with verses in stranger things, until dawn, 9-1-1, euphoria, umbrella academy, & more. Please read & follow rules before interacting. Replies posted Tuesdays.

—A STUDY IN; identity, grief, identical twins, similarities & differences, parental death, mental health, unhealthy coping mechanisms, & self discovery.

Carrd | Rules | Interest Tracker | Memes | Opens

[idcnticxl]

Vibes of Nova Laurens

yoinked from @buckleyonline

[idcnticxl]

Vibes of Jenna Laurens

yoinked from @buckleyonline 💜

tagging: @pittlamb and whoever else would like to scoop & steal. Template below the cut.

[rose-burn]

no bandages for that heartache // 3.10.17

[idcnticxl]

Sleeping Routine

Nova its a total night owl, she enjoys saying up pretty late maybe going to bed at 3AM at the latest.

If its been a particularly rough day for her she’ll smoke a joint or take an edible before bed. It’s a rare occurrence that it takes much for her to fall asleep usually if she puts her head down and closes her eyes she’s usually out within ten minutes. She doesn’t snore or talk, sometimes if she falls asleep face down on her stomach she tends to drool. Most of the time though she’s flits between being a side and back sleeper.

 Nova is usually a pretty light sleeper if not self-medicating. She doesn’t dream often, or at least when she does she doesn’t tend to remember her dreams. She is more prone to nightmares usually a recurring one about her dad’s death, but the older she gets less frequent that tends to be. 

When she lays down to sleep Nova doesn’t really have a huge preference on the lighting, she has no problem sleeping in dark rooms, or bright rooms or even just ambient moody lit rooms. If she has the option of opening or shutting doors she prefers to shut them. She likes her window open, especially in her childhood bedroom (the attic) in the summer to get a breeze and fresh air, she actually always has her bed right next to a wall with a window for this reason. 

[idcnticxl]

what flavour is your soul ?

mint

oh spry little dryad, spinning sprite, you drift through life as light as lion down. you are the chimes of churchbells and the laughter of faeries. gossamer and spidersilk shine from your ribs. life is fleeting, you more than anyone should know that. something we love today may never see tomorrow's sun. you pride yourself on skipping through moments, soft and merry. but you do not let your soul be tethered. is it for freedom or fear, sweetheart, that you do not let yourself be tamed? you are as fresh as and wild as bluebirds in snow, you smile at your problems before dashing away. hoping they will never catch up to you. but even nike can't run forever. you have been hurt before. but that is life. you wish to never feel that way again, but regretfully I must tell you that is nothing short of impossible. life is but part sorrow part sun, you cannot have teacups until they are burned by the kiln. oh I see the scars child, they shimmer down your chest, I see the pain in your eyes. but I also see the stardust. keep smiling, but allow tears also. you do not have to be solely wonder, fear, you are allowed to be bitter. so bite, and scream, and laugh, and love. that is what makes life worth living.

[idcnticxl]

what flavour is your soul ?

lavender

oh moon child, restless sleeper, tell me what it's like to dream? you float along the margins of reality, picking up the pieces of fallen memories to sculpt into your own realm. you are searching, but your tongue is quiet, quiet, quiet. open your mouth and sing my dear, silence only does you good for so long. and here you planted roots in the darkness, where not even the moon can reach your leaves. there is such a thing as being too practical, for you sail your ship on perpetually calm waters, and never have you spotted land. your mind has wings, uncage them! allow yourself to dream, you are not too far gone. there is no such thing! trust in yourself dear.

yoinked from @buckleyonline (hope that was okay!)

yeeting to @unwaveringcaptnash, @lovedbyspark (for birdie? or whoever you'd like), and anyone else yearning to participate.

[fuchsea]

btw i want to say that the entire tumblr community banding together is what got these changes reversed so i hope u all realise the power of a reblog and start reblogging posts instead of just liking them this is the reblog website so hit that button right now

[idcnticxl]

Personal Hygiene

Jenna showers every morning as part of her routine.

Bath’s are a much more rare occurrence for her, usually in the winter. Something about just getting into a warm candle lit bath just feels festive to her in a way. When it comes to scents, Jenna really like the Champange Toast collection from bath and Body Works, she has the body wash, the fragrance mist, and the lotion which she uses and re-ups on frequently. For her hair she uses a Godiva shampoo bar and Valkyrie conditioner. And she always always has spearmint toothpaste.