IkeaTheMan @ikeatheman - Tumblr Blog

pisshandkerchief

*guy who has repressed every feeling he's ever had* yeah I'm just really good at rolling with the punches I guess haha

isuggestforcefem

Hey darling come here. I promise it’ll be okay.

pisshandkerchief

i love you tumblr user isuggestforcefem

campyvillain

i see it so i See it I see Thart with me EyeBals

when i see it i Look at it Put my eyes on it with My sightballs I look with my look balls and see It so in front of me

i see it with my eyedbarls

dragonwhispr

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officialspec

can i say something. for years i thought the joke of the song short skirt/long jacket by cake was that he wanted a woman who was hung like a horse. like i thought when he says jacket it was a last-second fakeout because he very obviously meant to say cock. and the rest of the things in the song were just her personality and interests. which were secondary to her awesome penis

tanadrin

scrubbed the bathroom floor this morning. this sense of virtue and industry will last me easily into next week.

koukorndog-deactivated20260108

some of you would thrive in a monastery

diosapate-deactivated20240313

harrow and ianthe in book 1: i hate being so good at my job i have bested every single necromancer from my house. i am better than you. i am going to become a lyctor and serve at the right hand of god. and it isnt even going to be hard

harrow and ianthe in book 2:

likeadog

friend that doesnt drive: anyways really look the thing about origami is that its not about getting the fold right on the first try its meant to be an exercise in precision sure but also in patience the instructions are repeatable tasks that you do over and over again to polish the skill before applying it to something else. a thousand swans arent folded in a day and really its meant to bring you to reflect upon what it means to even be folding in the first pl-

friend that drives: HOLY SHIT 3.20 A GALLON? I SHOULDVE FILLED UP THERE anyway i understand the process is meant to soothe the itch of perfection that gnaws at the soul through exposure to imperfection but OH FUCK [drives over median straight into Walmart parking lot while nearby F150 lays on the horn because you stopped him from running a red light]

unalivejournal

my friends jerk off to more avant-garde concepts than your friends do

beaft

if you are reading this i want you to stop for a moment and imagine a crab

acidhues

valtsv

stares at you unblinkingly with my big haunted eyes the entire time you're trying to have sex with me

greelin

warm baked goods are insane. something so beautiful and almost maddening about absolutely tearing into them when they’re fresh. feeling warm all over after. I really do get vampires for real

greelin

“the vampire connection/mention was a jumpscare” Do you know who i am .

radiation

My saltine cracker acting demure as fuck

passionpeachy

shout out to the artists who's "art studio" is just their ugly ass cluttered bedrooms. those aesthetic art studios in instagram with hundreds of perfectly organized copic markers are not real it can't hurt you

marypsue

One of the worst feelings in the world: when you are just desperate, like claw-your-own-skin-off desperate, to create, but the only thing that even vaguely appeals to you to work on is a nebulous half-feeling that might be dreamily related to some half-formed notion of a concept. I must! Make! No thing! Only make!

marypsue

Everything is boring. All activity is meaningless. I understand why Sherlock Holmes did cocaine.