https://x.com/i/status/2078265228941578303
I really don't know how to feel times like this, I feel like this is… maybe 3 examples of bad people being trans men, and not 3 examples of trans men being bad people, you know?
We don't do this when a predator happens to be a trans women, do we? I don't remember seeing trans men celebrating Ava Kris Tyson was found out to be mega weird because it proved that trans women were predators or something. Because that was an example of a pred being a trans woman, not an example of a trans woman being a pred.
And the way several questions are raised - comparing makeup to semen in the first example IS weird if not SA (and friends backstage IS a different situation from being an audience member in a show that was probably 18+), and if two different people in the third example feel the person involved is creepy maybe there's something to it, I feel like this situation demands 2 sides.
The QRTs are horrendous as always.
Just thought you'd have any thoughts. I don't want to discount the experiences mentioned here but I also don't want to discount the experiences being described especially when they're being framed in a specific way.
it's mostly fundamental attribution error, honestly. they also don't hear about the times when these things happen to transmascs because transmascs do not feel safe enough to talk about their assault, they just tend to leave communities silently rather than expose their abuser because they know they'll likely not be believed. they don't see all of the transmascs who deliberately avoid these communities in the first place for their own safety. that's why they tend to be shocked at SA stats for us, and not believe them. because they don't hear about nor see them themselves, so they assume they can't be true. a lot of transmascs have had abortions, but I'm sure they never hear about that, either.
all of the stories described, I've heard plenty of the reverse. but you know what? I don't see things like that happening and go, "this is trans women's fault" "this is evidence that trans women are evil predators". and yet, that's precisely what these people do when confronted with similar situations. when it's their friends being assaulted, they give a damn. when it's their friends being accused, it's "I don't believe accusations against a trans woman unless there's solid proof" (something I've actually read on this website).
what's so frustrating is that this shit happens to both of us. but they only seem to see one side of it. and they've become convinced that they're the only ones experiencing this shit. they're not. you can find countless stories of transmascs going through the exact same scenarios. but they don't care. it doesn't bolster the narrative they've constructed for themselves. these are miserable, hate-fueled people. they don't care about victims. they really don't. I've seen how they treat trans women who aren't the good perfect victim for them. I've seen how they treat trans women who are victims of other trans women. they do not care about victims of assault. they're okay with rape if it's being done to the "right" person, in their eyes. when it's a trans woman who they don't like, they will justify endless cruelty. they will justify her death. these people are fake as hell. I've seen how they act and how they operate both online and up close. their belief system is a house is cards that's 90% performative, all to justify being cruel to girls they think don't fit the bill hard enough. they're full of shit. I've heard more than enough horror stories about these radfem and radfem-adjacent groups, especially in "safe haven" cities like Portland and Seattle, and it flat out has made me never want to live in any of those places. they're white centric, they're racist as hell, and they're like a playground for abusers looking for new victims.
these people extrapolate their abuser playground communities for the rest of the country, failing to recognize why their communities are so fraught with abuse. re: "I don't believe accusations against a trans woman" also typically involves younger trans women as the victims not being believed. predators know that. so they go after younger trans women, they go after trans women of color, they go after trans women who are less popular or conventionally attractive or whatever earns them less trust and respect in the group because they know that's all these people care about. they believe victims solely based off of how much they like the perpetrator vs how much they like the victim. it's extremely apparent if you've ever been around these insular trans groups in these types of places. they do not care about trans women's safety and they will actively jeopardize a trans woman's safety if it means they retain proximity to an abuser who they think affords them some sort of social clout or status or who helps pay their rent or who they try to live vicariously through because of this that or the other.
meanwhile, I can think of several trans guys in my local community who have been in abusive situations where the abuser was transfem, and in no world would I go "oh see clearly transfems are evil". because the majority of transfems are not doing that shit, and are actively horrified that anything like that would happen. unfortunately some are ignorant at best, but not abusers themselves. at least they're sympathetic. meanwhile every single time a trans woman has been abused around here, it has been the other trans women in community who have abandoned her because she threatened the social group by outing her abuser. ironically, it has been the transmascs who were already kinda ostracized away from community, who have been the ones to give these girls resources and shelter and actual fucking empathy for what happened to her. but people like OOP don't see that, because OOP will see a girl like that and think that she fucking deserved what she went through. OOP will see a transmasc abused by a member of the community and think that that transmasc deserved it. it's all a facade of social justice that none of them actually believe in. it's sickening. i hate it.
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