When the Company doesn’t realize you understand Khuzdul
The Company & reader, Fíli & reader if you squint
Requested: nah, I just plucked this from my “ideas for new wips” list because I got frustrated with every existing wip I had and I wanted to work on something new - something silly like this, where I didn’t have to think too much, just write and post
Warnings: Dwarves with no filter, a few saucy comments at the end
A/N: somehow these headcanon posts (that aren’t actually headcanons, just me being lazy and not wanting to write full sentences and paragraphs) are my most popular posts. And I don’t get it, but since I’m a people pleaser, have another one :)
it started from the beginning really
when Gandalf had proposed the idea of you joining the quest for several reasons, some of the Dwarves bursted out in complaints
because how DARE he suggest they needed the help of a human
they didn’t say it so politely of course
makalfûna bintarg siginkann didn’t exactly mean ‘that lovely human over there’
but Gandalf always gets his way so off on the quest you went
the first couple of days most of the Dwarves kept muttering to themselves or each other about you
not necessarily all bad things, but there was a lot of complaining involved
it wasn’t your fault you’d never ridden a horse or pony before
shocking right, living in Middle Earth?
it just happened to be that you and your horse didn’t really got along
which resulted in a few situations you’d rather not find yourself in
at least not in front of a dozen judgemental Dwarves and one wizard who was enjoying this far too much
like your stubborn horse suddenly taking off
cue two or three Dwarves - usually Fíli, Kíli and Bofur - trying to chase you and calm your horse while the others were laughing their arse off
or you failing to properly mount your horse, falling off countless times
that’s when the Dwarves became bolder and amused themselves with saucy comments and jokes on your behalf
because some of those comments were definitely not meant for your ears
you might have failed to mention that you understood Khuzdul just fine
one of the reasons Gandalf insisted on you joining btw
you spent most of your childhood around the Dwarves of Ered Mithrin (the Grey Mountains) who traded with your village and picked up the sacred language very easily
you always had a knack for learning new languages
at first it was rather difficult to ignore the jabs and insults, pretending you didn’t have a clue what they were saying
but over time you kind of got used to it and it became easier to just ignore them
you almost gave yourself away once when Kíli asked his brother to throw his water flask and Fíli answered that his was empty as well
and you automatically reached for your own flask to give the brothers
but then you realised they had been speaking Khuzdul
you stopped yourself just in time
other times you had too much fun pretending you didn’t understand them
especially when Thorin divided the tasks when setting up camp and he spoke Khuzdul out of habit
“… and the rest of you go gather wood for the fire”
everyone went to go about their tasks and you would still stand in the middle, arms crossed, a smile on your face, waiting
after a few minutes Thorin would roll his eyes and repeat the order in Westron
“Now why didn’t you say so? I would already be done with it by now.”
you loved to get a rise out of the Dwarven king
you promised yourself you would never tell them you understood every word they said
because to be honest, you were rather enjoying yourself and you could only tell them once, right?
but then one night when you were all sitting around the campfire after dinner, you finally broke your promise
it started rather innocent with the usual comments about your terrible riding skills
Dwarves usually have not much of a filter to begin with
add some ale they picked up en route and there’s no stopping them
you tried to ignore it and kept your eyes on the campfire
counting to ten, then a hundred, two hundred, …
biting your tongue to keep yourself quiet
but then Fíli - who had actually been rather nice to you - had to join in on the fun
“I bet I can teach her how to ride well”
cue boisterous laughter from most of the Dwarves
Thorin shaking his head in vicarious embarrassment
some of the others agreeing with Fíli
that was the last drop for you
you could’ve accepted it from anyone but him
you looked him straight in the eye
and answered in fluent Khuzdul with a deadpan face
“I don’t know if you’re strong enough to handle me, son of Durin.”
Gandalf snickering in his beard and then choking on his pipe smoke because he tried to keep his laughter in and horribly failing
all the Dwarves looking at you with wide eyes
“You… You can understand what we’re saying? You speak Khuzdul?”
you made a face that basically said ‘what do you think?’
smiling to yourself when you saw the realisation on Thorin’s face that you had heard and understood everything they said about you
you bid them all a good night after that
the sound of Thorin smacking them on their head lulling you to sleep
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