How X der Zeit would perform at Panem’s Drag Race
(With Cearis aux Dogér as Ru Paul and Jason Bright as Michelle Visage)
Heliogab: Is a really fucking weirdo and imediatelly says that he will naturally win this show. Gets eliminated in the first episode.
Kaori: Looksqueen with an instagram following. Cannot sing and gets eliminated in episode two. She has to sing against Lighton and everyone agrees that Lighton should have gone)
Tilly: Is really good and can sow and act… but looses in the singing challenge after getting bad advice from Turis. She is mad as fuck. (Dont worry, she will win All Stars)
Turis: SO fucking shady! Acts like he is best friends with everybody and then gives bad advise. The group finds out and Turis gets eliminated because she's distracted with her own drama.
Caravel: Looks really good and has a sense of style… but lieterally all her clothes are in graytones! Gets challanged to add some colour and ads a „light beige“. Get’s eliminated.
Joule: Can serve some really good looks and is way too quiet for the drama. The show finds her boring and finds a convenient way to get rid of her
Elliot: Peagant Queen. Complains about everyone taking the competition not serious enough. „Nobody goes through as much pain as me!!“ (Mostly backpain) Does a lot of death drops and leaves at Snatch Game.
Sora: Talented queen and resident „big girl“ (even though she is only the one person not actively starving). Gets voted miss congeniality.
Lighton: Cannot sing, cannot dance, cannot act, cannot sow….. what can she do???? Nobody knows and everyone hopes for her to have an arc…. She doesn’t.
Tesla: Another classic peagant queen. Is in literally all of the drama and just peak entertainment. Nobody wants to be in a group challange with her. Master oft he emergency gymnastics and lipsynch assassin.
Glory: Just your standard peagant queen. She can serve looks, sing dance… is even really inspirational and talks about her journey a lot! She just lacks a specialty and it gets her out.
Acorn: Epitome of profecionallism and poise. Basically Chad Michels. Just cannot not look beautiful and has trouble eating a burger on camera. Plays Jason Bright at Snatch Game.
December: Literally the most shady person on planet earth. „We are not at Ru Paul’s Best Friend Race“. Everybody hates her but she literally makes it into the finaly, because she gets a very nice and thorough villain edit.
Oxyll/Kester: The male judges nobody really cares about
Fatima/Tiffany/Numina: Guest Judges
Rhy: Old victor who appears in one episode and the finaly. Has some „playful banter“ with Cearis
Cas/Prion: Get invited into Snatch Game
Simon, Tave, Malachi, Mateo, Jakob and Phillip: The pit crew