Show & Tell
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Keni
will byers stan first human second
taylor price
art blog(derogatory)
trying on a metaphor
pixel skylines
Cosmic Funnies
No title available
❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
Not today Justin
i don't do bad sauce passes
h
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
DEAR READER
noise dept.
dirt enthusiast
祝日 / Permanent Vacation
Kiana Khansmith
seen from Canada
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Mexico
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Mexico
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Australia
seen from Norway
seen from United States
@incorrectchroniclesofnickquotes
Kyrian: Why are there 6 people outside who say they're waiting to meet with me?
Nick: So you know how you love me because you haven't had a single meeting with anyone since I became your assistant? That's because every time someone calls and requests a meeting with you, I always schedule it for March 31st.
Kyrian: Why?
Nick: Because I didn't think March 31st existed.
Nick: You two just need to bone.
Kyrian: What did you say?
Kody: Don't say it again.
Nick: I said you two need to bone.
*Kody winces*
Kyrian: Hhhhhhow dare you Nicholas Gautier. I am yoUR SUPERIOR OFFICER!
-5 Minutes Later-
Kyrian: BOoOoOoOoONE!
-10 Minutes Later-
Kyrian: What happens in my bedroom, Gautier, is none of your business.
-21 Minutes Later-
Kyrian: BOoOoOoOoONE!
-40 Minutes Later-
Kyrian: Don't ever speak to me like that again.
Caleb: Yeah, I told him to check on you.
Nick: Yeah, I figured you did...
Nick: I think we both knew that that's what happened. Don't phrase it, "I told him to go check on you." Just say it how it is.
Caleb: I was concerned. I wanted him to go check on you.
Nick: Just--no you didn't.
Caleb: I didn't know he was gonna scare ya.
Nick: Ye-uh-you know what you did.
Caleb: I do.
Nick: We've been over this before. There bear is the most deadly animal of all time.
Caleb: No, it's not.
Nick: Yes it is.
Caleb: No it's not.
Nick: Yes it is.
Caleb: No it's not.
Nick: If you put a bear in any uhh playing field in the world: water--
Caleb: Nope, hippopotamus.
Nick: Nope, fuck you dude. A bear's the most--
Caleb: Hippopotamus would kill a bear in a heartbeat. Fuck you.
Nick: I just told the teacher I need to go...to the bathroom.
Nick: I didn't tell her which one.
Nick: I'll go to the one at home.
Nick, calling from jail: I need you to come to Brazzaville, New Jersey and bail me out.
Caleb: I'm kind of in the middle of something.
Nick: Hurry, Cay. You have no idea of the kind of hardened criminals they've got me in here with.
2 kids sitting on a bench:
Kid 1: A-Are we gonna get our spray paint back?
Nick, whimpering: Save me, Caleb!
Caleb: You cheat at poker.
Nick: I win at poker.
Kody: YOU CHEAT AT POKER?!
Nick: You want some leftovers?
Caleb: What is that?
Nick: You've never had leftovers?
Caleb: No. 'Cause I'm not a quitter.
Casey: Are we gonna hang out?
Nick: I can't. I'm allergic.
Casey: To what?
Nick: You.
Casey:...So Tuesday.
Caleb, about one of Nick's ideas: Are you alright with constructive criticism? I don't want to sound mean.
Nick: No, go ahead. I want to hear it.
Caleb: It fucking sucks.
Nick: That's not constructive criticism.
Sometimes babies will point at me, and I don't care for that shit at all.
Caleb Malphas, probably.
Caleb: The Dead Sea is the saltiest thing on Earth.
Kody: Next to your bitch ass.
Caleb, writing on a piece of paper: Wednesday, March 22nd. Nick had an idea.
Mark: How long have you been sleeping with Caleb?
Nick: What? I don't even get...Why would...I...I've never had sex with anyone anywhere. It's none of your... You have the nerve, the audacity... An how... How do I know, frankly, that you're not sleeping with him? Maybe you are. Maybe you're trying to throw me off.
Mark: ...
Nick, sits down and points at ridiculous hat: Check it out.
Caleb: THAT IS THE MOST RIDICULOUS HAT I'VE EVER SEEN!! HAHAHAHAHAHA
Stone, walking by, sarcastically: Nice hat.
Caleb: HEY THAT IS MY BEST FRIEND AND THAT HAT IS AWESOME!
Caleb: 'Sup dog?
Zavid: Can you stop calling me 'dog'?
Caleb: Why though? You're as dumb as a dog.
Zavid: Dude.
Caleb: You're lucky I don't put you on a goddamn leash.
Zavid: What is it?
Aeron: Just a couple of dudes bein' guys.
Xev: A couple of guys bein' dudes.
Aeron: Just a couple of dudes bein' gay.
Xev: Show me your dick, Aeron.