incorrect ffvii quotes

just like it says on the tin! blog under construction

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[about to bury two people]

Rude: Are they dead?

Reno: Does it matter?

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Reno: I've just had an apostrophe.

Tseng: I think you mean an epiphany.

Reno: [gestures his fingers to his head] Lightning has just struck my brain.

Tseng: Well, that must hurt.

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Rude: There will come a time when you have a chance to do the right thing.

Reno: I love those moments. I like to wave at them as they pass by.

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Shotgun: [after a shootout with the cops] *Damn it*, you almost got us killed!

Legend: What did I do wrong? I thought you'd be happy if I got shot!

Shotgun: Yeah! Yeah, it would have saved us all a lot of trouble!

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Rufus Shinra: My vheels! My god, I can't move my vheels!

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Scarlet: You killed them!

Reeve: But I thought you liked them. They liked you.

President Shinra: THEY DIDN'T LIKE ME! THEY NEVER LIKED ME!

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Genesis: You didn't say the goddamn rendezvous was in a fuckin' basement.

Angeal: I didn't know.

Genesis: You said it was in a tavern.

Angeal: It is a tavern.

Genesis: Yeah, in a basement. You know, fightin' in a basement offers a lot of difficulties. Number one being, you're fightin' in a basement!

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Tifa: You gonna order something?

Reno: Ah, yeah. Give me- Give me a Tab.

Tifa: Tab? I can't give you a tab unless you order something.

Reno: Right. Give me a Pepsi Free.

Tifa: You want a Pepsi, pal, you're gonna pay for it.

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Reno: Anyways, you need people of intelligence on this sort of... mission... quest... thing.

Rude: Well, that rules you out.

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Reno: Anybody know you're here?

Nunchaku: Nobody. Not a soul, except, uh...

Reno: Who?

Nunchaku: Well, you see, I didn't know where your place was. So I asked the newsboy. He didn't know. So I asked the fireman, the green grocerer, the butcher, the baker, they didn't know! But the liquor store guy... HE knew.

Reno: In other words, the whole town knows you're here! Get out!

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Sephiroth: I hate you! I hate you! I wish I was never artificially created in a lab!

Hojo: That hurts daddy when you say that. Honestly.

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Rufus Shinra: Scarlet, when I was six years old my father said to me...

Scarlet: "Get out!"

Rufus Shinra [laughing] Before that. He said, "Son, stocks may rise and fall, utilities and transportation systems may collapse. People are no damn good, but they will always need land and they will pay through the nose to get it! Remember," my father said...

Tseng: "... land."

Rufus Shinra: Right. It's a pity he couldn't see from such humble beginnings how I've created this empire.

Scarlet: An empire? This?

Rufus Shinra: Scarlet, how many girls do you know who have a Loveless Avenue address like this one?

Scarlet: [sarcastically] A Loveless Avenue address? Two hundred feet below?

Rufus Shinra: Do you realize what people are shelling out up there, for a few miserable rooms off a common elevator?

Rufus Shinra, Tseng: What more could anyone ask?

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Cloud: We'll be all right if we can just get back on the expressway.

Barret: This don't look like no expressway to me!

Cloud: Don't yell at me.

Barret: Well whadda you want me to do, Motorhead?

Cloud: Try not to be so negative all the time. Why don't you offer a little... constructive criticism?

Barret: You got us into to this parking lot, pal. Now you get us out!

Cloud: You want outta this parking lot?... O.K. [drives through a shopping mall]

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Cloud: As Barret always says, there is no "I" in team, but there is an "I" in pie. And there's an "I" in meat pie. Anagram of meat is team... I don't know what he's talking about.

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Tifa: There's just one thing, Cid.

Cid: And what's that?

Tifa: Do you have to use so many cuss words?

Cid: What the fuck you talking about?

Tifa: Okay, Cid. Have it your way.

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Reno: I feel like I'm Han Solo, and you're Chewie, and she's Ben Kenobi, and we're in that fucked-up bar.

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Legend: I'll be a beautiful young woman, and you be yourself. Now, ask me out.

Tseng: You know, I'm really not comfortable...

Legend: [In character] Hello, sir. Was there something you wanted to ask me?

Tseng: [sighs] Fine. Would you like to go out on a date with me?

Legend: [solemnly] No. Your penis is too small.