The Magpie's Nest

😭 16,345 💯 worms 💌 vampire 🧛 🌽

[geopsych]

This is for anyone who wishes they could be out before dawn while snow is silently falling. From February 2022.

[prokopetz]

Robot offers to perform a striptease, then just stands there for several seconds emitting enigmatic whirring noises before an assembly of panels in their torso suddenly retract along previously invisible seams in a hauntingly organic sequence of geometrically precise motions to reveal some sort of Device.

[untimelytophat]

AWOOOOOOOGA!

[bontxt-deactivated20151125]

how do draw good

fill 14 sketch book

bad stuff is good stuff bc you made stuff

do you like sparkle???? draw sparkle

draw what make your heart do the smiley emote

member to drink lotsa agua or else bad time

d ont stress friend all is well

your art is hot like potato crisps

don’t let anyone piss on your good mood amigo

if they do

eat

them

[consultingcriminal-deactivated2]

this fucking post

i finally found it

in the name of the Lord

[marathehomosexual]

Persona fans are really mad at this because of how accurately portrays how shitty the modern franchise writes its female characters

[prideprejudce]

so today a public health official guy came into my class to give a lecture on disaster awareness and he was talking about house fires and mentioned that the reason people most likely die during a house fire is because they refuse to leave their pet inside or they go back to get their pet. and right when he said this my friend immediately turned his head and looked at me and in that moment I had the most complete and genuine acceptance take over my body. I would 100% in front of my family and Jesus himself walk straight back into some raging inferno that was once my house to go get my fat cat. I nodded back

[prideprejudce]

the best part of this post is reading all the tags from animal people who would also go back to save their pets. like no hesitation. walk backwards from heaven straight back into hell. someone even said they would go back for their fish. amazing

[sterna-hirundo]

If you are a person who would walk into a blazing inferno for your animal, and your pet has free movement around the house, here’s a training exercise that could help save you both:

1) Set off your smoke alarm or play the sound on your phone (if your home has no smoke alarms, pease get some!)

2) stand BY THE FRONT DOOR to hand out treats

Do this a couple times and then keep it up NO EXCEPTIONS. Accidentally set the alarm off cooking? Treats by the door. Smoke alarm sound on TV? Treats by the door. Changing your smoke alarm batteries twice a year like you’re supposed to? Give them a test run and your pets get treats by the door.

Most dogs and cats will clue in VERY quickly that hearing that specific sound means go to the front door and wait for treats.

If there’s an emergency and even if you leave by another way, you will still know the most likely place your pet(s) is and can direct first responders to help.

You can also do this for any other kind of emergency alarm. My friend had both her cats trained to go to the front door for a tsunami siren.

[depsidase]

[elfstrogenized]

You are perma tf'd into the first pokemon you generate on this website, how happy are you wit your new form

[annabelle--cane]

[scrolling through a fandom tag] wrong. wrong. incomprehensibly wrong. wrong but harmless. nice style and color palette but I don't care about that ship. mildly entertaining liveblog update. they whitewashed my girl :( . good joke, reblog. wro--well that's my mutual so I will politely look away. fifteen posts in a row by an innocent rp blog that I don't have the heart to block. take I agree with but op was annoying about it. chapter twenty-eight of a longfic wip. !! GOOD POST !!, instafollowed. bot. technically correctly tagged but uses this acronym for something completely different. museum worthy art piece by a sixteen-year-old from the philippines. wrong. wrong but in a new and exciting way that provokes thought.

[kabber]

something i really liked about project hail mary is that Rocky and Grace are both equally out of their depth and about as competent as the other. theyre both the smart one. theyre both total dumbasses. neither knows whats going on. they both think the other is an idiot baby. they both admire the other's intelligence so much.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

sorry to be a broken record every month but christ menstruation is a stupid concept. oooooh excuse me for not getting pregnant, why the fuck is there goo falling out of me about it? grow the fuck up and reabsorb that shit for nutrients.

[bigmammallama5]

happy pride

[agnesmontague]

ive invented (note: dubious claim) something i call the bear diet which is mostly fruits and vegetables with fish as the main protein source and something like once a month you eat a few hyperprocessed foods of your liking because that is when you, the bear, raid a dumpster in the suburbs

[stellarskyes]

after the hyperprocessed foods, do you take tranquilizers to simulate getting captured by animal control and returned to the wild?

[agnesmontague]

i would settle for melatonin gummies but well. knock yourself out

[the-haiku-bot]

i would settle for

melatonin gummies but

well. knock yourself out

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[animusbell]

celestia is such a funny character like she's constantly manipulating twilight and friends to do shit instead of just asking and you could arguably frame that as being bc she's a "god" and pushing fate to her design or whatever, except that she engages with the group like a normal and relatable person, which makes it more like villainous machinations, except 90% of this manipulation goes towards things like "I don't want my party to be boring shit again. put my little country girl blorbos in there with zero prep so they fuck it up bad"

[animusbell]

you think you've fucked anything up around princess celestia and she's like heh. no worries. all according to keikaku

[jukashi]

Celestia instantly makes more sense as a character when you ignore the princess stuff and remember that she's a 1000+ years old wizard. Of course she does manipulative trickster stuff to teach moral lessons and/or cause chaos to amuse herself, that's classic wizard behavior. Of course sometimes she's actually socially awkward and bad at personal relationships and has bad ideas that she thought were good that result in her eating shit embarrassing style, that's classic wizard behavior. Of course she lets the aristocrats and nobles run around being assholes she's still running on wizard advisor programming, she's basically trying to merlin the entire upper class of equestria instead of just a king and some knights. "Yeah uuhhh we'll release the incarnation of chaos himself from his ancient prison because we think this shy girl can be friends with him", terrible plan if you're thinking like a ruler, amazing plan if you're thinking like a wizard. Just look at Canterlot 'Castle' for five seconds and ask yourself if that's in any way a castle. No. Wizard tower, yes. Wizard.

[blinkees]

updated the character limit on the blinkie maker! previously 15 characters, you can now attempt to cram a whopping 25 characters on your blinkies!! certain fonts and font sizes WILL cut off. use your best judgement ok?

[fasciation-fascination]

perfect

[felixfeliccis]

[burr-ell]

YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN HANDLE CRITIQUE. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN EMBRACE BEING TOLD YOU WERE WRONG. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN ACCOMPLISH UNPLEASANT TASKS. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN DELIVER DISAPPOINTING NEWS. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU KNOW HOW TO BE DISAGREED WITH. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN BE CORRECTED. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN BE TOLD YOU MESSED UP. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU ARE ABLE TO DO HARD THINGS.

[elliespectacular]

Happy 24-6-01!