baek haewon 22 , hotel heiress with a taste for luxury and a fear of the future -- an OC character indie muse sideblog -- pinned by libby EST , 21+ 𐙚
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baek haewon 22 , hotel heiress with a taste for luxury and a fear of the future -- an OC character indie muse sideblog -- pinned by libby EST , 21+ 𐙚
✧˖° about // ask // opens ✧˖°
* 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐄𝐑 THEMED 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒.
masterlist of summer themed sentence starters. 👙🌊☀️🏖
❝ want to come pick fresh strawberries with me? ❞
❝ OW! this sunburn hurts! ❞
❝ let’s go to the beach! ❞
❝ you look beautiful in this field of sunflowers. let me get a picture. ❞
❝ i forgot my beach ball. can we stop in the store real quick? ❞
❝ i made lemonade. ❞
❝ you look like you could use a fresh glass of lemonade. ❞
❝ so, the summer carnival is tonight. want to come with? ❞
❝ how does my sand castle look? ❞
❝ beach trip? ❞
❝ i love fireworks! ❞
❝ the waves are perfect for surfing today. ❞
❝ let’s get cotton candy at the food court. ❞
❝ come sit on the sand and watch the stars with me… ❞
❝ no diving off the shallow end! ❞
❝ i can’t swim. ❞
❝ i’m scared to dive in. you make it look easy! ❞
❝ help me set this water slide up? ❞
❝ let’s go to the water park! ❞
❝ i love the water park! thank you for bringing me here. ❞
❝ let’s go down THAT giant water slide! ❞
❝ are you done mowing the grass yet? i’m bored. ❞
❝ it’s SO hot out. ❞
❝ i’m melting into a popsicle. ❞
*offers popsicle*
*shoots the water hose at you*
❝ oops! sprayed you with the hose! just thought you needed cooling off. ❞
❝ ow! ow! the sand is burning my feet! ❞
❝ will you teach me how to swim? ❞
❝ come swim suit shopping with me. ❞
❝ this bathing suit or this one? ❞
❝ is the water cold? ❞
❝ i got sand in places sand should never be… ❞
❝ i want a popsicle. pretty please? ❞
❝ you’re going to get a sunburn if you don’t put sunscreen on! ❞
❝ you need sunscreen. ❞
❝ i can’t swim… ❞
❝ let’s go boating. ❞
❝ can we get an ice cream? ❞
❝ what ice cream flavor do you want? ❞
❝ i see the ice cream truck! ❞
❝ want to have a picnic at the beach? ❞
❝ i forgot my floaties. ❞
❝ can we get this giant sea turtle float?! ❞
❝ do you need a life jacket? ❞
❝ you can’t jump in the lake without your life jacket! ❞
❝ i love the smell of sea salt. don’t you? ❞
❝ thanks for coming to the cook out. ❞
*at a cookout* ❝ do you want a cheeseburger, corn dog or hot dog? ❞
❝ you should totally buy that swimsuit! ❞
*at the beach* ❝ the wind is messing up my hair! ❞
❝ happy summer! ❞
❝ i wanna make sure that my sandcastle is the best! ❞
*on the boardwalk* ❝ check out my rollerskating skills! ❞
❝ want to go rollerskating? ❞
❝ water balloon coming your way! ❞
❝ please, please, PLEASE no scary movie marathon! ❞
❝ build a sandcastle with me! ❞
❝ no running at the pool! ❞
*at the pool or the lake* ❝ i’m jumping in! ❞
❝ no, my sandcastle is the best. ❞
❝ let’s pick seashells. ❞
❝ look! i found this huge seashell! ❞
❝ i’ll show you how to find shark teeth. ❞
❝ i saw a dolphin! ❞
*at a hotel* ❝ this oceanfront room is the best. ❞
*heading out to the beach, lake or pool* ❝ i got the cooler ready. do you got our towels? ❞
❝ let’s go camping. ❞
*at a campfire* ❝ i brought the marshmallows for the s’mores. ❞
❝ let’s make s’mores. ❞
❝ let’s grill out this evening. ❞
❝ your camper is so cool! ❞
❝ wanna make s’mores and watch movies in the camper tonight? ❞
*slips on the public pool patio*
*waving for help in pool/lake ocean* ❝ i’m sinking! ❞
follow @allthingsmusings for more!
finding it effortless to capture haewon in photos , a natural in posing and her beauty was nonnegotiable , anybody would be able to attest to that . woobin found himself smiling as she posed , each photo taking in sincerity and ensuring she'd always come out nice ; even if that was mostly thanks to her ability to have her photos taken . “ together ? ” asks after having silently admired her , inspecting the pictures . eyes gazed at her as she again posed with such ease , following her guidelines by tilting head into the poke of her index finger , causing cheek to automatically push upward ; mirroring it to her other cheek while displaying a charming smile toward the phone soon after .
“ of course , here . ” digits fish out her phone sticking up from her bag , airdropping the photos to her instantly —- woobin unfortunately having a memory like a sieve , so informations would get lost there pretty easily . leaning forward , closing the gap just a bit to murmur underneath his breath , kept just for the two of them . “ maybe wait with posting them though ~ ” said with a glint in both hues , smile portraying a feigned innocence . “ don't want your father scolding me, for making you skip class this afternoon . ” wasn't a class of great importance but , both families appreciated hard work and showing up nonetheless .
haewon's finger had literally been hovering over the pictures ready to post them out when woobin whispered , effectively pausing the heiress from sharing them out for the whole world to see . " uh ... sure , " she said , instead of shutting off her phone and hastily putting it back in her purse . " yeah . they would freak , " she smoothly lied , not having mentioned to him that her parents had been dead for almost fifteen years as to not warrant the false sympathy she'd been given by her other friends and ultimately ruining their friendship when things grew too awkward . haewon wasn't quite ready for that with him , yet .
" look ! " she decided to change the topic , quickly , and nodded towards a little coffee shop tucked away in the corner , so small it was nearly overshadowed by the grand architecture . " let's get something to drink -- i'm exhausted anyways . i'll get some coffee for both of us , my treat , since you got me out of class . " haewon didn't wait for woobin's approval before taking the first step , though didn't go far before she reached back to grab his arm and start to pull him with .
@deerhunteer another birthday gift , but from the princess
she had to wait until the castle slept for her to execute her plan . her ladies had taken off her heavy gown and replaced it with her sleeping one , braided her hair after washing it , and left it loose so it would form curls by morning . with bows from each of the women , the princess was left to sleep with only a single candle lit in the corner of her chambers . haewon didn't sleep ; she kept herself awake for hours , pondering the best routes in the castle that wasn't well guarded , and who she might run into in her little adventure .
it was just before midnight when she'd finally crawled from under her feather filled blankets and escaped from the warmth of her bed to wrap in her robe , grab the long item tucked in thick leathers , and peek her head out from behind the door she rarely opened herself into the hall to see if any guards were standing watch .
" princess . it's late ... are you alright ? " of course . the older she'd gotten , the more wary the king grew of her despite her good behavior . of course he'd have put two guards at the ends of the halls .
" i'm hungry ... i thought perhaps i'd wander to the bakery and take a loaf of bread , perhaps see if anything remained from the nights dinner . "
" we could fetch it for you and bring it back . "
" no , i'd ... like to go myself , if i could , " she attempted as she sheathed the long , heavy weapon under the leathers beneath her robe while still tucked behind the door . " and to the gardens , after ... i wanted to speak to my mother . privately . " if the guards could argue with the shrine made for the queen down in the gardens and a daughter who still wanted to pay their respects , they sighed , but parted .
" let one of us accompany you , " one tried suggesting . haewon shook her head .
" privately . i can assure you , i won't be long . " she took a step from her chambers , one hand holding her robe together . the guards turned their heads in the opposite direction .
" be quick , princess . the king has specifically requested your watch . "
she didn't doubt that as she took a carefree stride past them and continuing down the halls , waiting until she was out of sight from the pair , and quickened her steps in her slippers . even though the castle was dark and life seemed to cease , the warm glow from the lanterns on the walls and crackling of their fire brought haewon a soothing peace she enjoyed . the emptiness didn't frighten her at all .
she hadn't been telling a complete lie to her guards when she'd scaled the stairs to the basement in the bakery . the stoves were still warm and loaves of bread were left rising , the yeast wafting delicious aromas through the air that had the princess drooling . but she wasn't there for herself . she'd looked around the packet counters and shelves , leaving the heavy weapon set aside , already prepared for the next morning meals and menu's requested by the court . haewon almost worried she'd forgotten the baker had told her where they'd hidden it , until she remembered with an audible gasp , quickly finding one of the stepping stools to boost herself up and to the highest shelf where the small cake was left on a plate and covered with a cloth to deflect the flies .
" i can't believe i almost forgot , " she whispered to herself in a bit of disappointment , glancing briefly around her to make sure she hadn't been caught , now balancing the plate in one hand while the other reached back for the heavy leather .
the run from the bakery to the training grounds was much further than she'd remembered . perhaps it was river's company that usually made the time go by faster , the frequent visits becoming more common now that he was being given proper training and he spent less time within the castle , and therefore , less time with her . any time they now spent together was because haewon made the effort to do it , just short of river never failing to appear for the nightly escorts back to her chambers .
she'd seen him a mere three hours earlier , and yet , those three hours apart felt like a lifetime .
haewon heard him before she could see him . he stood there wielding an old sword , attacking a pillar filled with straw and dirt , a still standing frame for him to practice his hits on . not only had it been run down since he'd started his training , but haewon was sure she could spot new slashes in the fabric holding it together that looked ready to burst the insides any moment . and the effort he seemed to pull was far more violent than the other soldiers she'd witnessed -- whatever strength river had , he appeared to have more than the others .
she'd known he'd still be there . the princess didn't memorize his schedule perfectly ; but the casual drop of information he'd given her before he'd done his nightly bow and smile before he'd let her ladies begin her nightly routine gave away his location . haewon at first had been ready to scold him for wanting to train well past the necessary hours and get much needed rest , but quickly silenced her thoughts and formulated the plan to deliver his gift early . at least this way , they could celebrate his birthday privately .
haewon approached him from behind still balancing the plate and leather , no intentions on surprising him since he always seemed to sense her coming , but also wasn't about to interrupt his training . she hadn't made a sound -- until her slipper crunched over a dried petal and river turned , sword quickly pointing at whoever was trying to attack him from behind .
he'd dropped it almost immediately at seeing the startled looking princess at the end of the blade . " haewon ! what are you doing -- " a look to the cake , and to the item in her other hand that appeared to be weighing her down and sighed . " it's the middle of the night , " he pointed out , tone much less accusational . the sword was thrust to the dirt below and stuck straight up should he need it again .
" it's past midnight . it's your birthday . " she held out the plate to him with a smile after the brief recovery from his silent attack she'd almost faced . " you shouldn't have spent the beginning of it training . you already work so hard . "
" i got a late start , " he quickly rebutted as he accepted the cake and chuckled at the little design the baker had added in . " is it a lilac ? " he asked , examining the flower pattern made by a knife , poorly drawn , which he assumed haewon had done herself .
" it was supposed to be , " she chuckled back . " i never was quite good with my drawings . years of tutoring wasted . father was so disappointed i never could paint portraits the way he'd wanted . "
" you're good at plenty else , princess . " he looked around , the training grounds emptied , castle quiet , the only sounds coming from the occasional whistle of the wind as it blew dead leaves from the surrounding trees . sweat slicked his brow even in the chilly night air . " you didn't have to come out . you must be cold . " river was already looking for anything nearby to cover her , from the blankets used to protect the armor from the rain , to the armor itself , though didn't think haewon would agree to being placed in the rusty , used equipment . he set the plate down on a nearby straw stack and rushed to place his hands on her shoulders and rub them up and down her arms to try and warm her up .
" i'm fine . really , river , " she'd assured him . " i wanted to celebrate your birthday with you before anyone else . if it means leaving my warm bed to see you at such an ungodly hour in the morning , i'll happily do it . but again i question as to why you train so late ? you're already one of the strongest squires , you'll be a knight sooner than the rest , if not by your skill , by father's approval . he adores you . "
" i just turned twenty . i've been a squire for only a few years , i started much later than is necessary for a knight . i have to catch up with the rest . "
" you're already better than the rest of them . i see how hard you work . you have a natural talent for it , " haewon said . " actually ... i know you'll be knighted soon . not that father has mentioned anything , i just ... i know . you've worked so hard for it . i believe you will be protecting my family one day . " haewon lifted the leather , the length of it pulling at the bottom of her robe , just slightly exposing her nightgown to him , though river's focus was pulled to the glimpse of metal that escaped the leather holding it . " i decided to have your sword prepared early . i paid the royal bladesmith to make it for you ... "
for as heavy as it sat in her hands , she was able to lift it to properly present it , the leather falling open and showing the fine blade so fresh it glistened . river's expression relfected off of it as he took in the intricate design on the handle , the king's crest and the token baekje flower along the hilt .
" consider it your birthday present , " haewon shyly spoke as she let river hold it for himself to get used to it's weight . she tried to refrain from smiling too broadly when he swung it a few times and turned it in his palm so effortlessly , it would have shocked any of the commoners that he wasn't knighted yet .
he didn't dare sheath it by stabbing it into the ground as he'd done with his sparring sword . this was precious , held to his side as he looked to the princess with heartfelt eyes and a deep gratitude she'd never forget . then he reached to pull her into a hug , single arm around her shoulders , but still just as intimate as the teenage princess held him tighter .
neither of them spoke . it would become a precious memory for both of them , and haewon didn't want to spoil it by reminding river that she still had two years left before she was twenty and would be of age to be married off to the highest paying prince . that perhaps ... if he truly was knighted , perhaps inherit lands of his own gifted by the king , given a proper title ; just maybe there was hope her father would consider letting her marry for her heart instead .
" thank you , " he eventually said as he pulled first , but not too far that he couldn't gently grasp the princess by her chin and press a kiss to her forehead . his thumb gently stroked her cheek . " i'll make sure to cherish this present forever . it's not everyday that a knight is gifted his sword by a princess . "
" not just gifted . it's been tokened . " haewon pulled a slip of fabric from the leather tucked into the crook of her elbow . it was green , silk , appearing as a thin strip of ribbon that had been pulled form the sleeve of one of her dresses . she gestured for river to lift his sword so she could tie it around the base of the blade , his sword now favored by the princess . she then lifted it further , her lips coming to press to the same new blade delicately , and looked back to river with a silent gaze she hoped he'd understand . once more , silence fell between the pair and river felt his heart choke up in his chest at the words he wanted to say , but didn't dare speak them .
" happy birthday , river . "
the moment his eyes caught sight of what she was trying so desperately to hide in her arms, his gaze immediately shifted away. he had only intended to walk past her. he wasn't in the mood to speak—- not to her, not to anyone. the battle raging inside him was already exhausting enough. no battlefield, no enemy commander, no wound he had ever suffered compared to this. this was a war against himself, against every instinct telling him to stay and every ounce of reason demanding he leave.
his footsteps slowed despite himself. then stopped. a few feet separated them now. his hands remained clasped neatly behind his back, shoulders squared in perfect military posture, his expression carefully emptied of anything that could betray what he truly felt. “princess,” he began quietly, though the title felt heavier now than it ever had before, “i don't belong to the king... or anyone else, for that matter.” the words came out sharper than he intended. he knew he was reaching for excuses. anything that justified why he no longer stood beside the throne. anything that explained why he had chosen patrols in distant villages over remaining within the castle walls. “i'm still fulfilling my duty,” he continued, his voice almost painfully formal. “if that's what you're worried about.” it sounded wrong. cold. like he was speaking to a noblewoman he'd only just met rather than the girl he'd grown up beside. rather than… his haewon. no. she had never been his. she never would be.
he felt himself stiffen even further when she pleaded with him. when she admitted she missed him. his heartbeat stumbled. he hated that she could still do that to him. his eyes darted away before she could see just how fragile his composure had become. what was the point? what was she hoping to accomplish? was this supposed to make her feel better? ease her guilt? because every word she spoke only made it harder for him to breathe and what about him? how was he supposed to carry all of this for the rest of his life?
slowly, he tilted his head back. his eyes closed. he drew in one long, controlled breath, desperately trying to force every emotion back into the place he'd locked them away ever since returning to the castle and learning of her engagement. it wasn't enough. “no...” the word escaped him almost as a whisper. he slowly shook his head before finally looking back at her. the restraint he'd fought so hard to maintain was beginning to crack. longing settled openly across his features now. his eyes shimmered, tears threatening to spill at any moment. “what's the point?” it wasn't really a question. he didn't expect an answer. he already knew there wasn't one. another quiet breath left him. “i know.” his voice steadied again, though only barely. “i know exactly how this happened.” his gaze drifted briefly toward one of the castle windows before returning to her. “it wasn't you.” he swallowed. “it was the court.” another pause. “the dukes.” his jaw tightened. “your father...” he sighed softly. “he was afraid.” not of enemies. not of war. of politics. of losing support. of disappointing the noble families whose influence kept the kingdom stable. “he gave them what they wanted.” his eyes lowered briefly. “he gave them his daughter.” the words tasted bitter. “for the sake of the kingdom.” he looked at her again and this time there wasn't a shred of accusation in his expression. only sadness. “you didn't have a choice.” he said it so quietly it almost disappeared into the silence between them. “i know you didn't.”
for several long seconds, neither of them spoke. river finally forced his feet forward. he stepped toward her, not because he intended to stay but because he needed to leave. he brushed past her shoulder, close enough to catch the familiar scent of flowers that always seemed to follow her. it nearly undid him. he kept walking. one step. two. three. then stopped. his entire body went still. he couldn't do it.
slowly… he turned back around. when she saw his face this time, there was nothing left of the composed commander everyone admired. his eyes had become glassy. his breathing uneven. his expression openly broken. “even if we talked...” his voice came out rough, fraying at the edges. “what would that change?” the question echoed through the empty corridor. his voice rose despite himself. months of restraint finally splintering apart. he struck the palm of his hand against his own chest once. then again. as though he could somehow quiet the ache inside it. finally, his fingers curled into the fabric of his uniform, bunching it tightly over his heart. “i've loved you...” his voice cracked. for the first time since they'd met as children. river wang broke. “i've loved you since we were children.” tears spilled freely now. “before i knew what love even was.” he laughed bitterly through trembling breaths. “i never looked at anyone else.” his head shook slowly. “i never wanted anyone else.” his eyes never left hers. “it was always you.” always. “despite every warning.” his voice grew quieter. “despite everyone telling me where my place was. despite hearing over and over again that the princess was forbidden.” another tear slipped free. “that someone like me...” his fingers tightened painfully against his chest. “a monster pretending to be a knight...” his voice nearly disappeared. “could never dream of standing beside someone like you.”
the silence that followed felt deafening. for the first time in years… he had said everything. all the words he'd buried. all the feelings he'd denied. they hung between them now with nowhere left to hide. eventually, he exhaled. the anger left him first. then the desperation. what remained was exhaustion. “i know this hurts you too.” his voice had softened into something almost tender again. his hand slowly fell away from his chest, releasing the wrinkled fabric of his uniform.
he simply stood there. looking at her. memorizing her. perhaps for the last time. “but what can we do?” another silence settled. this one quieter. more accepting. his lips pulled into the faintest smile. heartbreak disguised as warmth. “we weren't meant to be, haewon.” he shook his head slowly. “some people spend their whole lives chasing happiness.” his eyes glistened once more. “ours was never meant to last beyond stolen moments.” his gaze drifted downward before finding hers one final time. “and now...” he forced himself to say the words that had haunted him since returning home. “all i can do...” his voice barely rose above a whisper. “...is stand beside the man you're meant to marry.” another tear escaped despite every effort to stop it. “and pray that he learns to love you even half as much as i always have.”
" river , " she'd started , turning to watch as he started to walk past her after his words hit her like a dagger to the heart that had her tensing at the stiffness of them . to be so blatantly told by anyone , her river , struck her deeper than she'd expected , forgetting the monologue she'd prepared once she heard his boots echo in the halls .
there wasn't any relief hearing he didn't blame her for the decision she'd been forced into , she knew that just as well as he did , yet the betrayal he felt ached deep in her bones and kept her awake , replaying the same look he'd given her upon his return to the throne room covered in the grime of his battles , and how he hadn't come by to see her like he used to .
" forgive me , " she started when he took those few steps . her dress' skirts swung back and forth at how quickly she'd turned , ready to follow him and beg for forgiveness for a crime she didn't commit . " i would relinquish the throne to be with you if i could -- " her voice choked in her throat , feeling her own exterior starting to crack at the desperation in her voice . then river said the very words she'd always known , but neither of them had spoken before ; the princess felt her breath begin to stagger . his own tears began to trigger hers , silently filling her eyes as she rushed the distance between them to grasp at his wrist gripping at the chest of his uniform . something , anything , wanting to calm him and take away the pain he felt even if it meant taking it upon herself .
" no , " she whispered . his hand might have released from his uniform and fallen back to his side , but her fingers now loosely wrapped around it , refusing to let go of the man she'd loved since she was a little girl . cathay's book she'd been cradling to her chest had been dropped and sat open on the stone floor , dust lifting in the air from its years of abandonment on the library's shelf and sticking to back of her dress , forgotten .
" the love i bear you is so great ... to know we can't be together -- " haewon sucked in another breath as the tears began to stream down her cheeks . " my heart has always belonged to you -- "
the princess felt herself fall . her hands still gripped his wrist , unable to release her hold even as her knees gave out from under her . haewon began sobbing as she released the agony from her heart , her forehead pressed against their joined hands . the humility of a princess on her knees before a knight without a family title would have had the dukes who demanded her marriage scoff at what had become of their kingdom's heir .
" forgive me , " she begged him again , this time desperate . " to not have you in my life ... to be married off to some stranger ... " her cries came to her harder now as her tears streamed down her face and soaked the same fabric of his uniform he'd wrinkled . " it feels like a part of me dies every day i can't be with you ... it gnaws away at me until there's nothing left ! and i never could show you how much i hold you in my heart . i love you more than any words i could say . "
and to know that their story would end there , with nothing shared between them more than a single kiss hidden in the gardens , broke haewon inside even more . that they'd never truly get the chance to love one another , or share those moments again she tucked inside her deepest memories could never be repeated again , made the princess sob harder and curse the dukes that had forced her into a loveless engagement . she and river belonged together , regardless of what fate had decided for them .
" you're the one i love most in this world , river . " slowly , her cries began to soften . her breath started to even , only after her legs fumbled once more , and her hold on him gripped tighter . haewon didn't have the power to change what had already been set in place , because surely , cathay wouldn't handle the humiliation of a broken engagement , especially with prince wooseok's struck pride . there was nothing the princess could do to change their fate .
.. well that's not the choreo! (x)
eyes watched as she was taking in the little details of the walls, the ceiling ; giving him the impression that perhaps it wasn't a bad destination he had chosen for them. attention is brought back to her after she announced wanting to take a photo, ink the memory. “ we could, want me to take yours ? or do you want one together ? ” inquiring, while eyes ran over the structure, seeing where the perfect shot may be best from —- to also capture the elements of the historical building. “ let me take one of you first ? ” a gentle smile surfacing on his visage, taking a few steps backward while fishing his phone out of his pocket, opening the camera. “ ready ? ” asking, then being a little bit extra as he lowered a bit in his knees, always serious about getting the perfect shots ; but also in ensuring haewon's beauty was shown through even a digital imprint.
if there was one thing haewon could always rely on woobin for was his ability to take perfect pictures . even if it meant embarrassing himself to a lower position , practically crouched over , he'd get the perfect shot . haewon naturally posed with her front turned and leg lightly kicked behind her , and moved a few times as she saw his finger tap at the screen before he lifted himself to show her the shots . " they're great ! " haewon enlarged the picture to make sure there weren't any imperfections , finding none , and smiling . " we need some of us together ? " she took the phone herself and turned the front camera on , stepping to woobin's side and using her free hand to cup under her chin , then another where she poked at his cheek . " that's better . can you send those to me ? " she asked .
the silence of the secluded hallway wrapped around them like a heavy velvet curtain, a stark contrast to the suffocating, shark-infested waters they had just escaped. for the first time all evening, herscherik let the rigid, board-room posture slip from his shoulders. he didn't adjust his cuffs. he didn't check his watch. his focus remained entirely on haewon, watching the way her back met the wall, creating a physical distance between them that suddenly felt miles wide.
her words hung in the quiet space, vibrating with a raw, vulnerable concern that caught him completely off guard.
are you ever worried about your heart ? what if there's someone you come to love dearly and can't act on those feelings ? you're marrying yourself off to a woman you don't love...
herscherik looked at her, really looked at her. a year ago, he would have calculated the exact response needed to placate a business asset. he would have offered a smooth, clinical reassurance about the pragmatism of dynastic unions, his voice a flat, unyielding line of logic. he had been an ice prince, a machine engineered by a ruthless father to convert human relationships into equity.
but looking at her now, with her eyes still wide from the ghost of his father's glare, the machine refused to start. the logic failed.
❛ haewon, ❜ he began, his voice dropping into that low, unshielded baritone she had pulled out of him in the VIP section. he took a single step forward, bridging the distance she had just created, though he paused just short of invading her space. ❛ you talk about this hypothetical person. this someone i might come to love dearly. ❜
he let out a short, quiet breath that was closer to a self-deprecating laugh than anything else. he looked down at his shoes for a brief second before locking his glacial blue eyes back onto hers eyes that were no longer cold, but burning with an intensity he couldn't suppress if he tried.
❛ do you truly think so poorly of my intelligence ? ❜ he asked softly. ❛ do you think i would accelerate a timeline, disrupt a decade-long corporate strategy, and openly defy the most ruthless man i know for a ghost ? for a possibility ? ❜
he closed the remaining distance between them, his movements deliberate, discarding every rule of corporate decorum he had ever been taught. he reached out, his long fingers gently catching her chin, tilting her face up slightly so she couldn't look away, couldn't peek back down the hallway toward the monsters they had left behind. his thumb brushed against the soft skin of her jawline, a touch that was entirely devoid of strategy.
❛ i am not worried about my heart, haewon. because my heart is currently standing in a deserted hallway, trembling because she thinks she's trapping me in a passionless marriage, ❜ he whispered, his gaze dropping to her lips for a fraction of a second before returning to her eyes. ❛ the ice prince didn't thaw because of a change in the weather. he thawed because of you. ❜
he let his hand drop from her chin, but he didn't step back. instead, he slipped his hands into his pockets, trying to anchor himself against the sudden, overwhelming wave of honesty pouring out of him.
❛ when this started, yes, it was a transaction. you were the baek group heiress, a beautiful puzzle piece. i went through the motions because that is what meyer men do, ❜ he admitted, his tone heavy with a genuine, localized regret. ❛ but over this past year, i stopped seeing the contract. i started seeing you. the girl who survived the same corporate dens of sharks i did, but somehow managed to keep her soul intact. your admission earlier tonight about your childhood... it didn't just move me, haewon. it broke something inside the machine my father built. ❜
he took a deep breath, the scent of her perfume finally replacing the suffocating memory of his father's expensive tobacco.
❛ i brought the wedding forward because as long as we are 'fake dating,' you are fair game. my father sees you as a negotiable asset. your family sees you as a bargaining chip. the media sees you as a target. but if you are my wife, the entire weight of the meyer empire stands behind you. i become your shield, and no one not my father, not your aunt, not a single executive in that room will ever be allowed to make you look over your shoulder in fear again. ❜
he leaned in slightly, his posture softening entirely, the last remnants of his cold, professional persona melting away into the quiet hallway.
❛ you asked if we can be ready before autumn. forget the brand deals. forget the media outlets and the stock prices. if you want a dress made of silk spun in italy, i will buy the loom. if you want to marry me in a plain white dress with no one but a judge present, we will do that. i don't care about the gala. i care about your safety. i care about your comfort. ❜
he paused, letting the weight of his next words settle between them, raw and undeniable.
❛ do not waste your sympathy on a man i might come to love in the future, haewon. because the only woman i want at the end of that aisle is you. not the baek group heiress. you. so tell me... can you walk with me ? not as a contract partner. but as mine ? ❜
haewon's head tilted under the guidance of his fingers and stopped breathing . they'd been posing for a whole year like this , intimately close , high tensions , plenty of photographs both publicly , and fake ones intentionally released to give the impression of a true couple . herscherik's intense stare left the heiress without words for a long time , until he left her with a question she'd known the answer to since she'd brought up the engagement .
" herscherik , " she started , arm raising to gently grasp the wrist that still held the side of her face . her thumb rested on his palm , no move to push away his touch , but rather secure it so he couldn't pull . she liked having him that close . " i trust you . i just worry ... " after all , he'd given her no reason he'd ever cared about her beyond the basic gentlemanly gestures done plainly .
people in their predicament weren't meant to fall in love . haewon had wanted something simple : companionship , transactional , perhaps friendly , all things she'd figured herscherik was capable of providing . he didn't seem someone capable of having real feelings , and the various meetings she'd had with his family proved how little he was raised with a kind touch . perhaps her heart was still fragile that she'd hoped something would develop , yet he kept saying the right things .
and she felt like she could breathe again .
" ... you mean that ? " she asked , replaying his words over in her head a few times to make sure she'd grasped everything he'd said . her doubts began to fade into a mere memory . if he was willing to do it this quickly , she couple comply , and her heart warmed that he was willing to speed up the wedding that was expected to be something incredibly extravagant , publicized , and expensive . " i would love that , if ... " she straightened her posture where she stood against the wall , hand falling from his to his tailored suit coat , holding the side of it near his waist . resting . " there are still expectations from both of us . interviews . a ring . a story from a proposal ... how many companies will want their name involved with the planning , the designers -- your father is already furious . my aunt couldn't have it if free publicity was passed . "
the longer the wedding was planned and anticipation built , it could make the headlines even bigger , more significant , opportunities that could arise -- by autumn ? the baek company wouldn't allow for that .
but herscherik was a determined man , and he was right . her family loved her -- but she was a pawn . so long as she remained unmarried , engaged , she was still open to be passed to the next , and the risk of volatility for the meyer group to be picked apart should a fake scandal try to pull them from each other at the sake of a higher buyer for haewon's family name . he was left as much of a target as she was .
" we can make our own story , " she suggested . " we marry . soon . perhaps only of your men and my aunt attend ... small . just a judge -- and let it release to the press that we wanted to be married on our own terms . but we have a wedding for everyone to watch ... " her aunt wouldn't be thrilled with the idea of a courthouse wedding , but she was a woman with a soft heart . haewon was sure if she convinced her family that the love she felt for herscherik was real , the more they'd support her decision . " i'm ready now , " she said . " it's not ideal , but if there's one thing we can have together , it's this . i'm ready to be your wife . "
a small smile settled naturally across his features as she spoke, softer than the reserved expressions he usually wore. his posture had long since relaxed, both forearms resting comfortably on the table as he gave her his full attention. he wasn't merely listening to reply—- he genuinely wanted to hear what she thought, every honest word she was willing to share with him. a gentle breeze drifted in from the ocean, stirring the warm evening air between them. it caught a few loose strands of her hair, sending them dancing across her face before they settled only to be lifted again a moment later. without thinking, his fingers twitched ever so slightly. he wanted to reach across the table. to tuck those stubborn strands neatly behind her ear. the impulse came so naturally that it almost surprised him but he stopped himself. not because he didn't want to but because he didn't want to interrupt her. right now, hearing her thoughts mattered far more than satisfying that quiet urge. instead, he simply watched.
“i was told the security detail enjoyed their stay here,” he said with a faint chuckle. “i think they accidentally ended up having their own vacation.” the image amused him more than he expected. they had probably anticipated a stressful assignment—- following around two newlyweds, remaining alert, always on standby.
when she admitted she had been scared in the beginning, however, his expression shifted almost immediately. “you were scared?” his eyebrows rose, genuine surprise crossing his face. for a brief second, his mind wandered. had she been scared of him? of the distant man she had married? of the reputation surrounding him? of the stories people told? or simply because she had been thrown into a marriage with someone who barely spoke? the thought lingered longer than he expected.
he let a brief silence settle before speaking again. “when we return…” his words trailed off as he searched carefully for the right way to phrase what he was thinking. his gaze never left hers. “the madness will come back.” he gave a quiet smile that held more understanding than amusement. “we'll both have schedules again. interviews. appearances. events. sometimes together, sometimes separately.” that part couldn't be avoided. it came with who they were. with the lives they lived. with the expectations placed upon them. “but…” he continued after a brief pause, “i think we can definitely keep what we've achieved here.” he meant every word. they weren't strangers anymore. not really. not after everything they had shared over the past week. the awkward silences had become comfortable ones. the accidental touches had become welcomed instead of avoided. they had cried together. laughed together. fallen asleep beside each other. held each other. slowly, almost without realizing it, they had begun building something neither of them had expected.
his smile returned fully when she admitted she had enjoyed the vacation he had planned. that alone felt strangely rewarding. he had spent a long time making sure this honeymoon wouldn't become another carefully orchestrated publicity stunt. there would be plenty of opportunities for photographs, public appearances and carefully curated moments once they returned home. this week had never been about that. it had been about disappearing. about breathing. about existing somewhere nobody expected anything from them. privacy. something he had come to value perhaps more than anyone realized.
when she mentioned how awkward those first nights had been sharing the same bed, he couldn't help letting out a soft snort of amusement. it really had been ridiculous. back then, every inch of distance had mattered. every accidental brush of their hands had been enough to make both of them stiffen. now… he found himself unable to imagine asking her to sleep somewhere else. when they returned home, the guest room she had been using before the wedding would most likely already be cleaned out. her belongings would probably have been moved into his bedroom by the maids. another small step forward. a seemingly insignificant change. and yet it represented something much larger. he realized, almost unconsciously, that he wanted to keep building whatever had quietly begun growing between them this week. he wanted it to continue. “this won't be the first and last time we'll have time off like this,” he said quietly. his voice carried certainty. not empty reassurance. a promise. “i promise.”
when she reached across the table and rested her hand over his, giving it a gentle squeeze, his eyes instinctively dropped toward their joined hands. he remained still. simply looking. there was something incredibly sincere about her. something impossible to fake. river had always believed he was fairly good at reading people and every instinct he had told him the same thing. she wasn't pretending. she wasn't acting. she meant every word she said. he wanted her to trust him. more than that… he wanted her to feel safe enough to depend on him. that responsibility had been given to him the day they married. whether the marriage had begun unexpectedly or not didn't matter anymore. she was his wife and he intended to take care of her. he knew he still had a long way to go. he wasn't perfect. he still struggled to express himself. still hesitated. still carried scars from a past he hadn't entirely let go of but he wanted to become someone worthy of standing beside her.
then she spoke again. the final sentence hit him harder than he expected. she was happy to be his wife. it felt like something struck directly against his chest. not painfully. quite the opposite. it was warm. overwhelming. the kind of feeling he hadn't experienced in a very long time. for a brief second, he simply stared at her. she had no idea what those words meant to him. how much they healed without even trying. he smiled. genuinely. “that means a lot.” his voice had softened noticeably. “it truly does.” his thumb shifted slightly beneath hers almost absentmindedly. “i'm glad that it was you because...” he stopped. his gaze drifted away for only a moment. the words sat heavily on his tongue. because it could have been someone else. someone like the woman he had married the first time. someone who had left behind nothing but betrayal and heartbreak. sometimes it still amazed him how quickly his life had once fallen apart. how completely everything had unraveled and now… it somehow felt like those scattered pieces were finally beginning to settle into place again.
he looked back at her. “i know you have no ill intentions.” there wasn't the slightest doubt in his voice. “you can trust me with anything.” his eyes held hers steadily. “my intentions are good too.” a faint smile tugged gently at his lips. “even if i appear cold and distant sometimes.” before either of them could continue, their waitress arrived carrying their order. the glasses of wine were placed down first, followed shortly by their dinner. “thank you,” river said politely with a small nod.
he had barely turned his attention back toward haewon when another familiar voice interrupted them. the hostess approached their table carrying several small photographs. she wore the same cheerful smile as before. “one of my favorite couples of the week!” she beamed warmly. “i've taken some polaroids of you while you were too busy talking. i hope you don't mind.” she laughed softly before placing them carefully onto the table. “a little gift to remember us by.” river blinked in surprise before instinctively leaning closer. his curiosity immediately won.
the first photograph showed the two of them dancing. haewon's head rested gently against his shoulder. his arm was securely around her waist. and… he paused. he was smiling. not politely. not for a camera. not because someone had asked him to. it was effortless. peaceful. the kind of smile that reached his eyes. he looked almost... carefree. as though, for that brief moment, there truly wasn't a single worry left in the world. the second photograph captured them mid-conversation. both smiling. completely absorbed in one another. neither looking toward the camera. neither even realizing they were being photographed. the third one made him pause the longest. it was quieter. more intimate. their gazes remained locked on one another across the table. haewon's hand rested gently over his. neither of them smiling quite as broadly this time. instead, there was something deeper in both of their expressions. something difficult to describe. river stared at it for another moment before a quiet smile slowly returned. “this reminds me...” his fingertip lightly touched the edge of the photograph. “of that one specific photo from our wedding.” his eyes lingered on the image. funny. back then, the photographer had captured two strangers trying to look comfortable together. now, without either of them noticing… someone had captured something that no longer looked like pretending at all.
that cold and distant man she'd once met on their first date was entirely different from the one she sat across from now . there wasn't hesitation in the way she nodded to the new concerns of their future ; while their honeymoon had been a wonderful vacation for haewon to fully let go of her stoic and careful steps , she didn't feel as fearful as she had before with their return back to their structured schedule . they'd have to go back to playing their respective roles .
" i already trust you , " she assured him with a brush of her thumb over the top of his hand . a soft smile followed . in just the one week spent on the island haewon had seen how far river was willing to go to open up and explain why he'd been so closed from her . now , the newly wed couple faced a return to their extravagant lifestyle with the vultures of the business world , yet no longer as strangers , as haewon truly felt the pair of them could face it together .
focus was pulled from river to their waitress as their meal was set before them , forcing haewon to retrieve her arm from across the table . that small touch had been assuring enough for the heiress to sit back and start to sip on the rich taste of the wine , though attention once more ripped from her husband to the hostess as the pictures were set before them . " they're lovely . thank you for these , " she praised as the couple were set to themselves again , haewon looking across the table to the three photo's before them .
her aunt had paid hundreds of thousands of won to make sure the wedding had been perfect in every way , from the catering to her dress , down to the flowers without so much as a single wilted petal set in the vases on the hundreds of tables . she'd had haewon pose for over an hour to get every shot to remember her perfect day , and their hostess had captured pictures more perfect in the last half hour than the professional photographer had done in an entire day . " it is like our wedding , " she agreed as she pondered over the last week . she'd gotten to know river's genuine smile from his forced on she'd gotten to know over the last year , and spotted in the first . to the second , and the last , a couple speaking so intimately haewon couldn't understand how the emotions of a conversation could translate to print -- she was happy . and it appeared her husband was , too .
" i'd like to keep them ... " it seemed like a waste to throw away such beautiful pictures . haewon was about to suggest to river that he take the first one of their dance and framed it on his desk like she'd seen many married men do , as a proud husband would . yet it felt so intimate for it to be displayed somewhere so public -- she didn't speak on it any further . " we can find a place for them at home . perhaps the maids can set them in a spot where we can both see them . "
home . haewon had spent only one night in river's apartment and treated it like a hotel , to already referring it to a place both of them shared . her many deliveries from her own loft and apartment filled the room she'd stayed in where she'd barely had her bed with the amount of clothes she justified bringing with her , many of them not touched in years , but too precious with her to part with . she wondered if river would mind her interfering with his normal routine , finding a bathroom sink cluttered with her skincare and makeup , her clothes kicked into the corner before the maids could clean it -- or if he'd already noticed those little habits picked up in the last week in their villa . he hadn't seemed to mind .
haewon lifted her glass towards her husband . " thank you , river , for a perfect week . it really has been wonderful . " she toasted , and then sipped , enjoying the richness of the island made alcohol that would serve as a perfect end to their trip . she silently hoped it would also serve as a beginning to their marriage and a secure partnership both of them could rely on as she knew what troubles they'd face when they returned with the volatility of the business market and the commonly used strategies to break up a marriage hoping it would crumble their respective companies . they would have to hold strong . still , haewon wouldn't let those worries ruin their final night together .
one glass turned into another , and haewon felt lighter and more giddy than she had since their arrival . their meal was finished and final bill paid , one last wave to their hostess and they'd been ready to find a taxi to take them back to their villa to start packing and ready for their return flight the next morning . but the waves of the ocean called them back and soon the couple found themselves with their shoes left on the restaurant deck , hands held , and walking through the sand along the shoreline one last time . they hadn't been the only couples with the same idea .
fire lit lanterns strategically fit into the sand kept their path illuminated . their hands swung between them , enjoying listening to nearby conversations , having some of their own , and pointing out the exotic island houses they passed and imagining who lived in them . at one point , both of them watched as a man and wife both tripped into a small sand dune and fell just in time for the wave to come and splash both of them , haewon unable to stop herself from refraining her laughter , the wine having made her more loose than usual to where she might have lost her balance if river hadn't wrapped both arms around her middle and held her steady . she'd managed to calm herself just enough that when the last of her laughter ended , her hands held his forearms , pleasantly enjoying their closeness , and turning slightly more teasing . " and what if i were to push you in the water ? " she threatened , moving more defensively as if she'd been about to shove him towards the same waves the couple in front of them had fallen into . it never happened , as a gentle finger pushed at the hairs from her cheek the wind had messed and haewon shifted her position .
both of them were still . their stares felt quiet and deep , haewon figuring river meant it out of a gesture of kindness to his wife , not the way she perceived -- that same look they'd shared after she'd cleaned off his wound . when they'd opened up . the same look he'd given her when she fell on his lap during the turbulent plane a week earlier . the amused glance to watching her fall into the pool and climb out looking like a wet puppy . their first meal together when haewon watched a wife throw a drink at her husband's face and how hard she'd tried then to hide her laughter behind her menu . how river had been so quick to come defend her when a stranger had insistently tried to get close to her at the beach , when he'd been quick to find her in the water when the waves had knocked her down , to how closely he'd held her when she'd cried in his arms from missing her parents . all from the same stranger she'd married eight days earlier ; both of them felt like they'd changed for the better , and closer .
haewon's hands gripped his forearms tighter , and slowly moved to hold the sides of his shirt . she didn't push too much , just enough that her forehead pressed to his and enjoyed the closeness she'd come to crave from him in the last days , and stilled . she wasn't asking for anything more than that . both of them held there until a gust of wind came through , not only stirring her hair and sending a foreign chill across her bare skin after the heat blasted both of them earlier that same morning , but also blowing out most of the standing lanterns . it was time for them to return to the villa .
neither one of them were willing to let go of each others hand as they silently walked back to the deck . river only let go when he stood on the deck first and bent to pick haewon up from the sand and lifted her up so her feet slid into her shoes rather than having to touch the deck floor . a taxi waited for them by the road and he held the door open for her to let her in first , and slid in after . for only a few minutes ride back to the villa , haewon didn't know why it felt like it took an hour with the silence filling the cab that smelled like old tobacco and fruity incense . she felt like she hadn't breathed at all with the silence so blaringly loud , as if either one of them were scared of saying something that would ruin the moment . then , a familiar building came into view and for the last time of their trip , they entered inside the villa . haewon looked down once more -- they hadn't released their hands and neither one of them seemed ready to let go , yet .
“I love the way you light up when you talk about what you love.”
— Unknown
on the journey back to the castle, weaving through villages, over rolling hills and beneath the dense canopy of ancient forests, river spotted a familiar procession traveling in the opposite direction. prince wooseok. except… only half of the prince's entourage remained with him. river slowed his horse ever so slightly, watching them pass. his stomach twisted. he hadn't been born yesterday. it didn't take long for the pieces to fall into place. half an entourage leaving. the other half remaining behind. there was only one explanation that made sense. his jaw clenched. they had gone through with it. the negotiations. the engagement. a marriage decided by politics, titles and kingdoms instead of hearts.
his mood darkened almost instantly. his already solemn expression grew colder still. so that was how easily lives were decided. how futures were written. how people became bargaining pieces. as though bloodlines mattered more than happiness. the irony wasn't lost on him. river himself carried a title that countless nobles would kill to possess. royal blood flowed through his veins. a lineage hidden beneath layers of carefully guarded secrets. yet none of it mattered. because alongside that blood came something humanity would never fully accept. the beast beneath his skin. the wolf he had spent his entire life learning to restrain. he had accepted that truth long ago. or at least… he had convinced himself he had. but lately, acceptance felt more difficult than ever. perhaps because, for the first time in years, he'd allowed himself to want something impossible. someone impossible and now reality had caught up with him.
by the time the castle finally came into view, river had buried every visible emotion beneath the same disciplined mask he'd worn throughout countless battles. he avoided every pair of eyes that landed on him. servants stepped aside. soldiers saluted. nobles whispered. river acknowledged none of them. instead, he led the remaining soldiers directly toward the throne room. the report came first. everything else could wait.
his armor was stained with dried blood, the once-dark metal now carrying deep burgundy streaks across the breastplate and pauldrons. dirt clung stubbornly to his face, neck and hands. he hadn't bothered cleaning himself. hadn't bothered making himself presentable. what was the point? the world already felt like it had turned upside down. appearances no longer seemed important.
as he entered the throne room, conversation gradually ceased. the silence spread on its own. perhaps it was the blood. perhaps it was the exhaustion written across his features. or perhaps it was the heaviness surrounding him. whatever the reason, the room grew quiet. river approached the throne. bowed deeply. then straightened once more. not once did his gaze wander toward haewon. he couldn't. instead, he looked only at the king and dohyun beside him. standing exactly where river himself normally would have been. “king woojin...” his voice came out calm. almost emotionless. “i'm deeply saddened to report that many homes had already been burned by the time we arrived.” he paused. his throat felt strangely tight. “many lives were lost.” another pause. “among them... several children.” the words hung heavily throughout the hall. river never looked away from the king. truthfully… he couldn't bear to. shame settled heavily inside him. he knew rationally that he had arrived as quickly as possible. that no commander could have ridden faster. that the enemy had simply struck too soon. none of it mattered. all he could think was that he hadn't been fast enough. “i would recommend dispatching a permanent unit to guard the village while reconstruction begins,” he continued. “along with skilled craftsmen capable of rebuilding what was destroyed.” his voice remained level. professional. though inside, he had already considered volunteering himself. remaining there. helping rebuild every single home with his own hands. perhaps it would lessen the guilt. perhaps not. ultimately… the decision belonged to the king.
before the silence could stretch further, one of the elder dukes stepped forward. “sir wang.” the older man smiled kindly. “you've done everything within your power.” river remained still. “we're proud of you.” the words barely reached him. they drifted past without meaning. then the duke's attention shifted elsewhere. toward the royal family. “on the brighter side...” he continued warmly, “you've missed quite the announcement.” river's stomach dropped. “our princess has chosen prince jinwoo to become her husband... and the future ruler of our kingdom.” everything stopped. for one brief moment… he forgot how to breathe. a lump formed painfully in his throat. slowly… almost mechanically… his eyes finally lifted. they found them. haewon standing beside prince jinwoo. the royal couple. his vision blurred for only a heartbeat before he forced it back into focus. “...is that so?” his voice nearly cracked. nearly. somehow, he kept it together. barely. he lowered himself into another respectful bow. inside… something fractured. it wasn't anger. it wasn't resentment. it was betrayal. irrational. undeserved. he knew that. haewon had done nothing wrong. she had fulfilled her duty. the very duty they'd both known would one day arrive and yet… his heart refused to understand what his mind already knew. his fists tightened at his sides. hidden within the folds of his cloak. “congratulations, prince jinwoo.” the words left his mouth. dry and empty. devoid of warmth. they sounded nothing like genuine congratulations. thankfully… everyone attributed it to exhaustion. no one questioned it.
after a brief discussion with the king regarding the eastern villages and the next course of action, river was finally dismissed. he retired to his quarters without another word. his armor was handed over to the squires for cleaning. he barely acknowledged them. instead of resting… he walked. straight back onto the castle walls. patrolling. again. and again… and again. there was no immediate threat. no invading army waiting beyond the horizon. no lurking assassins hiding in the shadows. that wasn't why he couldn't stop moving. it was himself. everything he'd buried. everything he'd refused to acknowledge. every emotion he'd kept chained for years now clawed relentlessly against those restraints. he knew what losing control could mean. he knew exactly what the wolf beneath his skin became when emotions overwhelmed reason. it would be ugly. dangerous. he couldn't allow it. for everyone's sake… he had to endure. he had to keep walking. keep breathing. keep pretending.
until, somewhere along the towering castle walls, hidden from servants, guards, and wandering nobles… his composure finally broke. tears slipped silently down his cheeks. one after another. there was no sob. no sound. only quiet tears disappearing into the cold night air as he continued walking. he realized then… he didn't think he could look haewon in the eyes anymore. because every time he imagined seeing her… his mind betrayed him. where there should have been understanding… he imagined betrayal. where there should have been acceptance… there was only heartbreak. he hated himself for it.
days passed. then more. river quietly transferred many of his usual responsibilities to dohyun. his lieutenant resumed standing beside the king. attending court. guarding the throne. handling duties river had performed faithfully for years. meanwhile, river remained elsewhere. patrolling villages. inspecting roads. keeping peace far from the castle whenever possible. anything to avoid lingering within those familiar halls.
during other days, he crossed paths with the princess countless times. in corridors. across courtyards. during official gatherings. every encounter was brief. every interaction painfully polite. gone were the easy smiles. the teasing remarks. the warmth that had once come so naturally between them. now there was only respectful distance. formal bows. measured words. carefully controlled expressions. he never treated her poorly. never once neglected his duty toward her but he no longer treated her the way he once had and with each passing day, river found himself wondering whether he would ever truly return to his place beside the throne… or whether dohyun would eventually become the king's permanent protector, while river resigned himself to guarding distant villages instead. perhaps… that would be easier for everyone.
it hadn't taken long for haewon to realize what unfolded that night in the throne room . she'd barricaded herself in her chambers that night crying into her sheets as she replayed the betrayed look on river's face with her ladies listening to her grief from their surrounding rooms . they didn't dare trying to console her as they knew where that grief came from , and wouldn't risk adding to the princess's sadness over something taboo as her love for the knight .
the announcement of her engagement added to a new list of responsibilities as a wife that seemed more daunting than her future as queen . her father was still alive and healthy ; the dukes were more focused on haewon's role as heir with her involvement with the kingdom . there were plenty of visits to the surrounding villages with prince jinwoo accompanying her . the people quickly fell in love with the foreign prince and his charming kindness , and even haewon caught herself unable to resist his smile . it wasn't too difficult for her to pretend to love him , though once the pair of them were usually alone , it grew quiet .
she could tell the prince was internally struggling with his new role . one of the maiden's that accompanied the remaining entourage was often seen watching jinwoo , and haewon had caught the pair of them once walking the gardens while the rest of the castle slept . her own insomnia kept her awake and hoped she might find refuge with a stroll herself , just to find that it was already occupied . she didn't listen as to what the pair spoke , but figured it was enough that they deserved their privacy . rather than feel infuriated with the prospect of her fiancee in love with another woman , she felt as though both their fates had treated them unfairly . she took pity on the prince .
as river separated himself further from her family , the same routines slowly faded . no longer was she accompanied to her chambers as the royal family retired for the evening ; first , dohyun had taken river's place , and haewon softly questioned the lieutenant where the knight had run to . she had clarified further as the sweet faced soldier informed her that he was told to take over the role as river worked elsewhere . then , it was jinwoo who escorted her instead . he'd always kissed her hand respectfully and bid her a goodnight . their silent looks to each other never failed as if they both knew each other's secrets neither one of them would tell .
jinwoo's friendship wasn't enough to fill the empty hole in her heart from river's disappearance . without him being so near made her feel like she was lost inside her lifelong home -- everything felt so empty without him . then when she did see him , she'd get excited , even if just for a moment , then to get ignored . the princess deflated and choked back the ache in her throat as she felt like she was about to cry , but always surrounded by her ladies or by the castle staff that she had to hold it back . then river seemed to disappear from the castle entirely .
haewon wondered if it was all her fault . if she could find him and explain the pressure she was under , tell him how much she missed him , and try to plead her case that he'd forgive her for having to choose another , perhaps he'd listen . she felt like she was dying each day she couldn't be near him -- every day without him felt like a day that wasn't worth living . it wasn't just an infatuation ; haewon knew how madly in love with the knight she was ... if she could just tell him that , perhaps he'd find it in his heart to forgive her .
she heard the heavy boots coming down the stone halls . haewon had just left the castle's library holding one of the books of cathay's history ; should she marry in to their family , it would only be respectful for her to learn of her husband's home as he'd done to learn of hers . she quickly cradled it to her chest so river couldn't see what she was holding , as to ignore the reminder of the choice she had to make , with who , and there wasn't enough time for her to cover it . the thickness of the book and spine labelling the country couldn't be hidden . haewon gasped as she looked up to see river as she had many times before , only now there wasn't the same excitement she might have had spotting him . there was only a formal bow and a casual acknowledgement of her presence .
" ser river . " too formal . it was only the two of them . she knew he was going to try to walk away , and decided to speak first , his honor too sensitive for him to walk away when a member of the royal family to ignore her . haewon's breaths were more short . she needed to say it , quickly , before someone else could pass them . " the villages are safe , now . your place is beside the king ... you're sworn to him , " she started , trying to remind him of the oath that he'd taken , and hadn't broken , though his absence was noted by many . " please return to your rightful place beside my father ... " it still felt stiff . haewon could see his tense posture . " river . i miss you ... please . you're the one that i hold in my heart more than anyone , if you could just look at me and understand how difficult it has been for me to wander the castle without you being near . i feel like i'm suffocating . "
she took a step closer , blocking his path . he wouldn't dare push past her .
" for all that we've meant for each other . can we speak privately ? if you are to continue on like this , let me speak my peace before it kills me . "
“it’s just this one in particular—- i noticed how arrogant he is.” river spoke quietly, the words accompanied by a faint click of his tongue. of all the men gathered beneath the castle roof, wooseok had managed to stand out the most—- and not in a favorable way. the prince was certainly memorable. headstrong. sharp. far too observant for his own good. many of the nobles seemed impressed by him. even some members of the court appeared intrigued by the confidence he carried. to them, it likely looked like strength. to river, it looked like something else entirely. cunning. that was the word he would use if forced to describe him. there was something beneath the polished manners and carefully crafted smiles. something that put every instinct river possessed on edge. he couldn't explain it fully but he felt it. the same way a predator sensed another predator nearby. and judging by the way wooseok's expression had tightened after river interrupted their conversation and stole the princess away, the feeling was mutual. the prince had smiled through it. of course he had but beneath that smile, anger simmered. river had seen enough battlefields to recognize hostility when it stared him in the face.
a quiet sigh escaped him when haewon admitted she didn't want any of this. the prince competition. the dances. the endless parade of suitors trying to prove themselves worthy. “i know, princess... i know.” his voice softened immediately because he did know. more than she realized. lately, being around her had become increasingly strange for reasons he couldn't explain. it wasn't merely that he could read her expressions or anticipate her moods anymore. it felt deeper than that. almost as if her emotions echoed inside him. when she was happy, he felt lighter. when she worried, something in his chest tightened. when she was hurting… he felt it too. it was unsettling and yet he found himself unable to pull away from it. the arm she held tightened gently beneath her grip, the smallest squeeze offered in reassurance. a silent gesture. i'm here. even if it wasn't enough. even if he couldn't actually solve the problem standing before her. “i'm sure you can tell the king that none of them seem eligible to rule in his stead,” he continued quietly. “i'll have a word with him too.” his expression darkened slightly. “i've heard things i didn't enjoy hearing.” understatement. “and i don't think he would enjoy hearing them either.”
the banquet carried on despite everything. music continued flowing through the hall. servants moved between tables carrying silver trays piled with elaborate dishes prepared specifically for the occasion. river eventually resumed his duties, positioning himself farther away this time while the royal family and visiting princes sat together for dinner. from his post, he observed. always observed. the food itself looked impressive even from a distance. roasted meats, delicately arranged vegetables, pastries and desserts crafted by the royal chefs. the rose petal jam made an appearance as well. river's favorite. the sweet fragrance drifted through the room whenever servants passed nearby carrying it. for a fleeting moment, he found himself wishing he were anywhere else and eating a jar of it in peace.
unfortunately, peace never lasted long. his attention shifted when another unfamiliar face appeared among the visiting royalty. river frowned. he knew every name on the guest list. every title. every family. he had memorized them weeks ago as part of security preparations and yet this prince hadn't been among them. prince jinwoo. the younger brother of wooseok. his arrival immediately drew river's attention not because he caused problems. quite the opposite. while wooseok commanded attention through arrogance and forcefulness, jinwoo seemed almost detached from the spectacle surrounding him. quiet. reserved. careful with his words. even carrying the same cold expression as his brother, there was something noticeably gentler beneath it. something that didn't immediately raise every alarm in river's mind. still. the mystery surrounding him bothered the knight. he disliked unknown variables and prince jinwoo was rapidly becoming one.
dinner stretched on for quite some time before eventually giving way to more dancing and conversation. haewon returned to her duties. dancing. speaking with princes. evaluating them. doing everything expected of a future queen despite clearly wanting no part of it. river continued watching from afar. until he noticed a soldier rushing toward him. immediately, his stomach sank. soldiers didn't run during events like these unless something had gone wrong. “in front of the castle gates?” his brows furrowed. confusion flashed across his features. that was… bold. ridiculously bold. before he could respond further, he felt fingers wrap around his sleeve. haewon. river glanced down then for a brief moment, his eyes closed. the decision already felt impossible but duty came first. it always did. “i won't be long,” he whispered. his voice was meant only for her. he offered one final reassuring look before carefully stepping away. then he sought out dohyun. his lieutenant. his most trusted officer. the man who had repeatedly proven himself capable whenever river was absent. if anyone could maintain order in his stead, it was dohyun. “jeong,” river said quietly. “observe prince jinwoo closely. his behavior, his interactions—- everything.” dohyun nodded immediately. the faintest hint of a smile touched his lips. “got it, sir.” satisfied, river finally turned away. if dohyun was handling matters inside the castle, he could focus entirely on whatever awaited outside. he gathered several soldiers and departed immediately.
horses thundered across the castle grounds toward the gates. the situation became clear shortly after arriving. his men had already apprehended two burglars. several others had escaped. many more lay motionless on the ground where they had fallen. river wasted no time. the interrogation was short. efficient and deeply concerning. when he finally returned to the castle, he didn't bother changing. he entered the grand hall still wearing his dark armor, immediately drawing attention. both the king and dohyun looked alarmed upon seeing him. river didn't waste time with formalities. “i'll be leaving at once.” the room fell silent. “one of the burglars confessed that an attack had been planned on a village near the eastern border.” his jaw tightened. “it could be a lie.” a pause. “but i can't risk innocent lives.” he immediately began issuing orders. redistributing forces. assigning responsibilities. preparing a rapid-response unit and then—- his eyes found her. the princess, currently dancing with prince jinwoo. for a moment, the world seemed to slow. they spun together and finally, she saw him. river wished he had more time. wished he could explain. wished he could tell her he'd be careful. instead, all he could offer was a distant look. an apology carried through expression alone. then he turned away and left.
the ride east lasted nearly a full day. his soldiers pushed themselves relentlessly. rest came only when absolutely necessary. by the time they reached the village, the attack had already begun. they were too late to prevent it entirely and river hated himself for that. his intention had always been simple—- drive the enemy away from populated areas. force them farther into the wilderness where innocent people wouldn't suffer but time had not been on their side. the damage was already done. homes burned. families mourned. casualties littered the aftermath. people had died. river carried every single loss personally. the battle that followed stretched over days. what began as a defense quickly became a hunt. he refused to allow the attackers to regroup. refused to give them another opportunity to target civilians so he pursued them relentlessly. through forests. across hills. through rivers and abandoned roads. one by one, he tracked them down and one by one, he made certain they would never threaten anyone again.
by the final days of the pursuit, mercy had become difficult to find within him. those who surrendered were spared death but not freedom. some were left alive with permanent reminders of what happened. missing hands. missing legs. wounds that would follow them for the rest of their lives. not out of cruelty but purpose. river wanted survivors. he wanted stories carried back to whoever had organized the attack. he wanted fear. he wanted them to remember exactly what happened when they threatened the people under his protection and when the last enemy finally fell, silence settled over the eastern border once more. but victory felt hollow. because despite stopping the threat… he had still arrived too late to save everyone.
river's honor was one of the parts of him she'd admired the most ; though , when he started to leave and her hold slipped from his sleeve , it was reaching out to find it again so he wouldn't separate himself from her . an audible whimper left the princess as she was suddenly left bedside the king who saw the devastated look on her face , and gently patted her shoulder . perhaps he noted the sad eyes for once that wasn't out of fear of a close friend of getting hurt for once , and the longing behind her gaze that grew more devastated as river grabbed a few soldiers and started their attack .
" haewon . prince jinwoo requests your company . "
she blinked . not even a chance for her to process river's departure that struck heavy as she was left behind to suffer her fate , and forced back to her duty in finding a suitable husband to rule her side as king consort one day .
thankfully , jinwoo was different from his brother and haewon didn't feel that same discomfort she had with wooseok . he kept his distance at first , noting the longing stare between the princess and the knight , and carefully pulling her from the grand halls towards the back rooms where her family's portraits hung . despite her silence , he still kept near , and when haewon was able to build some of her confidence back once more and a hand was offered , she was slow to accept the invitation , though was guided through a dance equivalent with the same poise as her tutors had .
she hadn't danced with anyone else for the next hour . her mind often drifted back to river , worried about his safety , worried of what would happen during his absence as she was left there to fend for herself amongst a castle of princes that wanted her hand , or if she'd be forced into a decision she wasn't ready to make . jinwoo had managed to distract her from some of it with his charms , not having heard river emerge until she'd spun , and locked eyes with the knight just as he was starting to leave again . for him to not even remove his armor when entering in the grand hall -- something was very wrong ?
haewon paused mid step in the dance . jinwoo had noticed immediately to the look and exactly what was behind that silence , and when the princess instinctively took one step forward , ready to run the distance between her and river from their opposing ends of the hall , he reached out to gently grasp her forearm to stop her from outing herself to all the shocked nobles at the sudden appearance as the head of the king's guard .
" princess , " he warned , soft , slightly stern , but more as a plea for her to stay behind and not do something foolish . and surprisingly , it worked . haewon stilled . but it did nothing to stop the desire to join him in battle if it meant being with him just a moment longer .
as the night drew to a rather rushed end considering the news of the uprising , the king had done well to keep the nobles and travelling princes in high spirits and had promised to discuss the ongoing proposals in the following week . the princes were welcome to stay in baekje and the guest chambers during the discussions , which many of them bid haewon goodnight and a different smile unique to each of them .
only jinwoo had been the one to kiss at her hand as he bowed before her .
small counsel meetings were already something she'd dreaded due to their boring , ongoing arguments that never went anywhere over such small matters . the next morning , haewon sat in her spot fiddling with the silks of her fine dress and staring in her lap . news sent from river and the ongoing uprising , her heart broken for the lost villagers and innocent lives taken , and the dukes rather quick to offer support to river and his soldiers . when she looked up behind her father to see dohyun standing behind him , she felt herself begin to tear up .
" -- cathay's prince wooseok promised a strong army to defend baekje should the princess accept the proposal . prince ryo from wakoku offered his own proposal , but with his father's illness and imminent death , he couldn't attend as he'd hoped , though still wishes to be considered ... " all noise she'd tried to drown out as they began to close on their discussions as if her opinion hadn't even mattered of her marriage . all those men discussed simply for their opportunities presented to baekje , without any of their morals or personalities -- haewon sniffled once . she knew dohyun could spot it .
" have you made you decision , princess ? "
all the eyes were on her . haewon looked down again as she urged herself not to cry in front of them as one tear slid down her cheek .
" haewon ? " she heard her father ask , his voice more soft than the others , and his tone had her wondering that if she asked , truly , with all she was , that perhaps he'd have pity on his daughter and see how all of this was breaking her apart .
" prince jinwoo . "
while it had been a surprise to the small counsel over choosing the prince who hadn't been invited as a proposal , there wasn't any hesitation for the acceptance . planning started immediately as the other princes were thanked for their journey's and sent home , haewon politely bowing to them upon their exit , and shivering at the sight of wooseok's glare as he passed without so much as a nod .
jinwoo had stayed behind . as he wasn't the crowned prince as heir , there wasn't a title for him to inherit as king , which meant his new home would be in baekje and began learning of the kingdom immediately with tutors and educated on the kingdom's flower trades and markets . haewon at first was hesitant to spend time with him , though as she watched his struggle adapting to a new home and feeling as though he was sacrificing his own future to help with hers , she offered her support . and the two developed a friendship .
the days began to blend together as more stories of river's success in the villages . haewon often tensed at hearing the violence of it all ; she knew he'd treated the survivors as fairly as they deserved , and hearing of the destruction caused to the innocent lives , it couldn't feel like a victory . his return was announced a day before his arrival , and it wouldn't be a grand entrance as the duke's had hoped . they stood in the throne room awaiting his return , haewon beside the king , and jinwoo behind her , now announced as baekje's newest prince and soon to be king consort .
when the heavy wooden doors opened and river led his weary soldiers through , haewon choked up -- he looked awful . like he hadn't slept in weeks , his armor bloodied , his hair disheveled , skin covered in grime , and expression focused -- this wasn't the same knight she'd come to know after his battles . he was always victorious and held himself up with pride , and despite the last of the burglars being defeated , it was river who looked like he'd lost the battles . she might have stepped forward as she would have in the past , though now kept her feet planted on the stone , jinwoo's hand holding the princess on her back as a reminder not to once again reveal herself in front of the king and of the dukes . it was gentle ; supportive -- someone who could see how hard it was for haewon not to run to his arms and beg for forgiveness for choosing another man that wasn't him .
river changed quietly while haewon got ready as well, giving her space while he focused on his own appearance. despite being on vacation, he couldn't entirely abandon the habits he had built over years. his outfit ended up simple, effortless in appearance, yet unmistakably expensive. a crisp white linen button-down sat comfortably against his frame, the sleeves rolled neatly just below his elbows. paired with it were tailored navy shorts that looked casual enough for the island while still carrying the polished look he naturally gravitated toward. there wasn't much in terms of accessories. his wedding ring remained where it belonged on his finger. his wristwatch, the same one he wore nearly every day at work and during most outings, rested comfortably against his wrist. finally, a pair of sunglasses found their place atop his head. nothing flashy or excessive. he glanced at himself briefly before looking toward haewon. “let's go.”
the drive to the restaurant passed comfortably enough and by the time they arrived, the evening atmosphere had already settled over the island. warm lights illuminated the outdoor seating areas and the sound of waves could be heard faintly in the distance. upon entering, they were greeted by the hostess they had met before. the woman chatted pleasantly as she escorted them inside, asking how their stay had been and whether they had enjoyed the island. river found himself answering more easily than he normally would. “it's been fantastic.” he wasn't even exaggerating. haewon seemed to agree. and honestly, despite everything, despite the unconventional circumstances surrounding their marriage and honeymoon, he meant it. it had been fantastic. maybe it would've been even better if their honeymoon had unfolded the way most people expected one to. maybe. but considering where they had started, considering the awkwardness and uncertainty that existed between them at the beginning, what they had now felt far more valuable than whatever expectations society had attached to the word honeymoon.
their table overlooked part of the shoreline and once seated, river picked up his menu, only partially paying attention to it. his attention shifted the moment haewon stood. he looked up and immediately understood what she was doing. his brows lifted slightly. she moved toward him confidently, extending her hand as the live music shifted nearby. he could've declined but strangely enough, the idea never even crossed his mind seriously because just as she approached, the music changed. the lively island rhythm softened. slowed, transforming into something far more intimate. something romantic. a dance designed for couples. for closeness. for lingering touches and somehow, that didn't scare him at all. if anything, it felt natural. a faint smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “how can i deny my wife?”
setting his napkin aside, he stood and accepted her hand. her fingers slipped into his naturally. effortlessly. like they had done it countless times before. he guided her hand upward toward his shoulder while her arms found their place around his neck. meanwhile, his own hands settled carefully against her waist. river glanced around briefly. nobody seemed concerned with proper technique. there were no perfect ballroom steps. no strict posture. no expectations. people were simply dancing. holding each other. enjoying the moment and for perhaps the first time in his life, he found himself doing exactly that. he pulled her a little closer. close enough that only she could hear him. “you know...” he murmured. his voice was low. “i don't mind dancing.” his eyes met hers briefly. “even though i probably don't look like it.” that earned the faintest amusement from him because he knew exactly what impression he gave people. serious. reserved. distant. the kind of man who spent more time in conference rooms than anywhere else. the kind of person people assumed had forgotten how to enjoy simple things. maybe they weren't entirely wrong but this week had proven something to him. he hadn't forgotten. he had simply stopped allowing himself to.
their movements remained slow, matching the gentle rhythm of the music. nothing complicated. just swaying together. his hand resting securely against her waist. her warmth close enough to feel and despite every instinct that once would've told him to pull back, to create distance, he found himself enjoying every second of it. with her. specifically her. the realization sat quietly in the back of his mind. unspoken but impossible to ignore. this entire week, he had discovered a version of himself he hadn't seen in years or perhaps it wasn't a new version at all. perhaps it was simply the real one. the one hidden beneath responsibilities, expectations and years of emotional walls.
the music eventually came to an end. the hostess took over the microphone once more, thanking everyone for participating. applause spread throughout the restaurant. river joined in before guiding haewon back toward their table. once seated, he reached for the menu again. though before opening it fully, he glanced toward her. “i'll have some wine tonight.” his fingers tapped lightly against the menu. “we can take a cab back to the villa.” it was their final evening. their last full day before reality came rushing back. he wanted to enjoy it properly. he hadn't touched alcohol since arriving on the island, mostly because he had been driving everywhere but tonight felt different. special. worth savoring.
after placing their orders, a comfortable silence settled over the table or at least, it would've been comfortable for most people. river, however, wasn't particularly fond of long silences. not anymore. especially not with her. he found himself wanting to know what she was thinking. wanting to hear her voice. wanting the conversation to continue. so after a moment, he spoke. “you were really shocked when i dismissed the security detail after we arrived.” he leaned back slightly in his chair. genuinely curious. “how was it?” his gaze remained fixed on her. “this little vacation away from everything and everyone?” there was no teasing in his tone, he wanted the truth. not the polite version. not the answer she thought he wanted to hear. the real one. he wanted to know whether she had enjoyed this as much as he had. whether the isolation had been freeing or frustrating. whether she had felt trapped or relieved. whether this week had changed anything for her too and perhaps, though he would never admit it aloud, part of him was hoping her answer might tell him something about where they stood now. because somewhere between storms, shared silences, late-night conversations, accidental cuddling, tears, laughter, and quiet moments neither of them seemed willing to acknowledge directly, things had shifted.
the honeymoon was nearly over. soon they would return home. return to their lives. return to expectations and for the first time, river found himself wondering whether he was actually ready for this bubble they had created together to pop.
haewon hadn't experienced this relaxed dancing before tonight . their wedding , which had been catered as a media pr event from the announcement of the engagement , had been mostly choreographed , with just enough closeness the cameras could have caught the shared looks between the newlyweds and came across as convincing . each smile she'd given and little words she mouthed at him were all a part of a performance , but this , this was truly an intimate moment for the couple . wind blew from the ocean waves so close . the fires on the top of the tiki's had uneven flames and often flickered ; the worn floor from years of salt water damage and clumsy dancing still had sand caked between the boards , and despite the quietness , it was more personal than their wedding .
other than river's quiet admittance of dancing , she didn't respond . haewon had tilted herself forward where they were close and could peek at him with a soft smile , though as the pace shifted to a slower sway , she let herself do that thing again she'd done a few times in the last day ; she tested another boundary . her head moved to rest on his shoulder , their movements so gentle it it wasn't uncomfortable for her to rest like that . she knew a night like this was temporary , and rather than use the time to speak , she let that silence continue until the music stopped . her applause was light , and happily allowed herself to be escorted back to their table .
" if i knew how to drive , i'd be happy to take the car . i'm fine taking the cab , " she joked as she scanned the wine menu , settling for a more expensive bottle towards the bottom that would have had anyone else's eyebrows raise . hardly something either one of them had to consider as she opted to enjoy a nice drink with her husband on their final night together before returning back to their new home . back to the silence , the pretending , and having to look happy at all times ; if anyone saw the facade start to drop , it would be ripped apart online . their reputation couldn't risk the slightest hit .
his question only proved that . haewon pondered his question , wondering what sort of answer he was hoping for , his sincerity showing in the tone and the silence after he spoke , and suddenly she wondered if she might have pushed that boundary too far .
" i thought our honeymoon would be another pr stunt like our wedding was and prepared myself for a week posing for the cameras . a full security detail in the plane with us ? i expected media to be in the airport waiting , " she admitted with a small shrug of her shoulders . haewon glanced down at the table between them and the way his arms rested on the table , resisting the urge to rest her own closer to him , maybe let her fingers touch his as an assurance that the week had been something special to her . " i was worried at first , but i had so much fun this past week i don't remember why i was so scared in the first place . for as withdrawn as you were in the beginning , i'm a little more assured when we return home , that we can continue being as open with each other as we've been here . "
she wanted him to know that . the last week where she could be truly relaxed and albeit , perhaps a little embarrassed with her falling in the pool their first day , crying herself to sleep in his arms , it was haewon in her most authentic form . if they were truly going to be married , she didn't want to change who she was when it was just the pair of them . " i think your planning was executed wonderfully and i enjoyed every minute of our trip . storm , the initial awkward nights sharing a bed , and when you saw me fall into the pool . it made me comfortable to be around you . " she reached across anyways , her hand covering his , and giving it a gentle squeeze . " it's made me hopeful that when we return home , no matter how difficult it will be given our situation , we're both people we can depend on . i'm glad if i had to be married off to someone , that my family agreed on you . i'm happy to be your wife , river . "
the trip had ultimately been a success. other than the attack they had encountered along the road, everything had gone according to plan. no further threats emerged from the forests, no unexpected delays slowed their progress and most importantly, the princess had remained safe throughout the entirety of the journey. river was grateful for that. he had spent every mile of the journey carrying the weight of responsibility on his shoulders and seeing haewon return to baekje unharmed felt like a victory in itself. it was one less thing to worry about in a life that seemed determined to pile concerns upon him.
unfortunately, the peace didn't last long. rumors had already been circulating through the castle before their return. whispers among servants. quiet conversations between nobles. speculation exchanged in corridors when they thought no one important was listening. river had heard enough to piece together what was coming long before it was officially announced and before long, rumor became reality. princes began arriving from every corner of the world. some came with lavish entourages. others arrived carrying gifts, wealth, promises of alliances and carefully rehearsed charm. all of them had come for one reason—- princess haewon's hand in marriage. river hated it. he never voiced that opinion, of course. doing so would be inappropriate. dangerous, even.
instead, he buried himself in work. still, every time another prince arrived through the castle gates, he found himself studying them with increasing skepticism. none of them seemed worthy. perhaps that was unfair. perhaps he was biased but every single one fell short in his eyes. none possessed her kindness. none seemed capable of understanding her. none felt right and despite knowing better, despite understanding exactly why these suitors had been invited, a selfish part of him continued hoping they would all fail.
the preparations consumed much of his time. as commander of the royal guard, security during an event of this scale fell largely upon his shoulders. foreign royalty brought opportunity but they also brought risk. river carefully positioned soldiers throughout the kingdom's most vital locations while the guests continued arriving. checkpoints were strengthened. patrols doubled. scouts dispatched. then, once every visiting prince and his entourage had settled within the kingdom, river strategically began recalling portions of his forces closer to the castle itself. a precaution. nothing more. at least, that was the official explanation. the truth was simpler. he didn't trust any of them. not completely. not yet.
the evening of the formal introductions arrived quickly. the grand hall had been transformed for the occasion. noble banners hung from towering stone columns, candlelight danced across polished floors and music drifted softly through the gathering as princes mingled with nobles and diplomats. through it all, river remained at his post beside the king. silent. watchful. his gaze constantly moving. most of the princes were exactly what he expected. overconfident. eager. desperate to impress but there was one in particular who immediately put him on edge. prince wooseok. river disliked him almost instantly. there was something about the man that set every instinct on alert. perhaps it was the confidence that bordered on arrogance. perhaps it was the way he carried himself as though every room belonged to him. or perhaps it was simply the look in his eyes. calculating. cunning. the kind of man who smiled while already plotting three moves ahead. the kind of man river would never trust with a kingdom. let alone a wife. especially not haewon.
as the evening continued, river found himself paying closer attention whenever wooseok approached the princess and every passing minute only worsened his opinion. the prince interrupted others frequently. dismissed opinions he didn't care for. spoke as though he already possessed authority within a kingdom that wasn't his. but what truly angered river was the blatant disrespect. the kingdom. the army. the king. the traditions of baekje itself. wooseok seemed intent on slighting all of them in one way or another and then he turned that same attitude toward the princess. despite leading her farther away from the center of the gathering, far enough that most wouldn't hear their conversation, river still caught every word. enhanced hearing had its advantages. he heard haewon speaking. patiently and politely, explaining and he heard wooseok repeatedly dismissing her. not listening. not caring. not even attempting to understand her perspective.
river's jaw tightened. his fingers curled subtly behind his back. every instinct screamed at him to intervene. to walk over and remove the princess from the conversation. to remind the prince exactly where he was and whose hospitality he was abusing but he remained where he stood. barely. because he couldn't simply start a fight with foreign royalty. no matter how tempting the idea became.
as if the gods themselves sensed his patience wearing thin, the servants began entering the hall with dinner preparations. the timing couldn't have been better. river seized the opportunity immediately. offering a brief word to the king, he stepped away from his post and crossed the room. his strides were measured. calm and controlled. though anyone who knew him well would have recognized the determination behind them.
he approached from behind wooseok, coming to a stop just close enough to make his presence impossible to ignore. even then, the height difference between the two men was minimal. river cleared his throat. the sound was enough to draw the prince's attention. a small smile appeared on river's lips. pleasant on the surface. taunting underneath. “if you'd excuse us, prince sung,” he said smoothly. “the flower knight was sent to retrieve the princess.” the title was deliberate. so was the interruption. before wooseok could object, river stepped neatly between them. his hand extended toward haewon. the softness in his expression returned immediately when he looked at her. a stark contrast to the look he'd been giving the prince moments earlier.
“princess,” he said gently, offering her an easy smile. “your father would like to speak with you briefly before dinner is properly served.” whether the king had actually requested that was beside the point. river had already decided she was leaving and there was very little anyone could do to stop him. once her hand settled into his, he guided her away from the prince without another word. behind them, he could practically feel wooseok's stare boring holes into the back of his uniform. the irritation. the anger. the challenge. river felt all of it and just before they disappeared fully into the crowd, he glanced back over his shoulder. only briefly. long enough for their eyes to meet. long enough to send a clear message. a warning. not spoken aloud—- the look alone said everything. watch yourself.
haewon's guarded position and wide eyes softened upon river's presence . there wasn't any hesitation taking his outstretched arm and leaving prince wooseok behind without a proper goodbye ; even as rude as he'd been , a princess should always thank their dancing partner with a respectful bow as it was proper , though his boldness had struck something deep and fearful within her that she pushed to river's side without thinking .
" is this how it's supposed to be with all of them ? " she whispered under her breath as she was guided further from the prince , though she felt his glare to her back and the offense he'd taken for the knight to have so easily pulled her away like the rejection had hurt his pride . it hadn't been until they were far from the other's while the tables were being placed on their designated spots that haewon felt as though she could finally speak freely without fear the prince still listened . he hadn't hurt her , not physically , though was left so unsettled she couldn't shake that feeling off of her .
" i don't want to do this , " she tried to plead with him as if river could be the one to rescue her from her fate . " i'm not ready . i know what's expected of me and what my future holds , but it's too soon . what if they're all like that ? i don't want to be resigned to some stranger ... " her grip on his arm tightened as they paused and haewon glanced over her shoulder to see if wooseok was still there , finding the area he'd once occupied eerily empty . she spotted him across the hall speaking with one of his nobles , accompanied by another slightly younger man dressed as finely as him , though haewon couldn't recall meeting this prince before and wondered where he'd been considering she'd already danced with the others .
the banquet felt awkward and forced as haewon was seated with the ten princes and their respective nobles . father's kind laughter seemed to break some of the tension , though as he spoke to the men and seemed to be getting to know them through his questions , she figured the king was simply trying his own method of interrogation ; wooseok's answer , combined with his smirk towards haewon and the arrogance to his tone , had haewon pinching at the silks of her dress under the table . the king noticed the shift in his daughter's position , and his smile fell , just slightly , but not enough that his composure slipped and was quick to move to the next prince as haewon tried to spear a piece of her fruit with her fork without the shaking in her hand dropping the polished silver to it's plate .
" and prince jinwoo ? how kind of you to accompany your brother on his travels . have you had a chance to meet with the princess yet ? "
" i have not , your majesty . baekje's princess has been occupied this evening , i would hope she'd do me the honor of a meeting later tonight , if she pleases . "
haewon bowed her head towards prince jinwoo , as her polite response to the request as the dread of meeting another stranger filled her inside . as the violins and music started up once more , she hadn't moved far from her father , and by association , still kept near river's side . she'd hoped for a dance , perhaps find a way to have him rescue her from the night entirely by sneaking her from the halls , though fate once again showed it's ugly plan as one of the dukes approached the royal family , and it's sanctioned knight .
" your majesty , there's been a small uprising in front of the castle gates from the burglars . perhaps we should send ser river and a few guards to resolve ... "
haewon felt her breath pick up again , not hearing the final words as the king responded with a solemn nod . she'd reached to the side to grasp at river's sleeve , subtly , silently , begging him not to leave her there alone with the strangers . no one else could have spotted it but him , though from the other side of the grand hall , prince jinwoo had . a sympathetic look crossed his features , and had also been a witness to his brother's volatility , and started to cross the hall .
" river , please don't , " she'd whispered so lowly she'd thought he didn't hear it at first . as if river , the most loyal knight she'd ever seen , would refuse one of the king's direct orders . " father , send the other king's guard . ser river is standing guard here -- "
" haewon , prince jinwoo requests your company , " he'd pointed , as the younger son of cathay stood mere feet away from the princess with his arm extended out in a silent invitation , his expression far more softer and welcoming than his brother's had been .
capturing her expression as she’s viewing the old structures, still-standing, frozen in time, as if centuries hadn’t passed by this area. “ because it’s different—- ” pausing, both of them so heavily used to luxurious lifestyles and events, that woobin figured it'd be nice with a change of scenery for the both of them. “ why ? ” tone hints mischief as soft eyes lock onto her. “ don't you fancy a stroll down the 1800s ? ” words leaving plush brims in a joking voice, knowing it wasn't their typical meeting spots.
" it is nice . it's just ... different . " there was certainly a beauty to the old architecture , more colorful and elaborate , compared to the spotless monochromatic tones she was used to in most of the places they shopped around . haewon paused where they walked to look straight up at the cathedral style elevated ceilings to take in the intricate detail that must have taken years of carpentry work to perfect . " should we get a picture while we're here ? " she asked . " it is a beautiful building . like you said , much different , but also much appreciated . "
a mini vacation for @deerhunteer
“ are you a princess ? “
The question had been asked with such a childlike innocence and with sparkling eyes haewon didn’t immediately panic . she might have choked on her stew , sending little drops of both coughing into her palm , but otherwise maintained her composure and replacing her momentary surprise with a smile both to the sudden appearance of a little girl and her question .
“ what makes you think that , hm ? “ she asked sweetly with a little nudge of her fingers under the girl’s chin .
“ you’re really pretty . “ the little girl sat down next to haewon on the bench and pinched at the fabric of her dress , one she’d thought was a significant downgrade from the dresses she’d worn at the castle and the fine silks , hoping the less expensive style would blend in more . “ your dress is nice . it looks new ... and you wear your hair down . most women wear it up in braids to keep it out of their face when they work . you don’t have it covered , either . “
Haewon’s smile fell just slightly , looking around in the inn’s kitchen to the other women occupying its other tables . most of them looked the part ; cloths covering their hair and keeping it from their face , dirty aprons covering their obviously old raggy dresses to protect what remained of the fabric , and while most of the women staying as guests were clean skinned , the ones working the inn had grease stains smudged on their arm and caked under their nails . haewon quickly sat on her hands when she caught a glimpse of her own nails , still clean and neatly groomed , before the little girl would take notice . she’d thought her new styling would help her blend in more as they travelled .
“ i’m not a princess , child . just a noble travelling through . “ the disappointment across the little girl’s features actually had haewon feeling slightly guilty for lying , resisting the urge to pinch her cheek in hopes of bringing her mood back up and see those sparkling eyes again . the girl’s attention turned to the man sitting on her other side and catching river mid drink when she spotted the sword sheathed across his waist . she lifted a finger and pointed .
“ he’s a knight ! “
Then it was river’s turn to choke , coughing into his sleeve with a shake of his head , and trying to quickly clear his throat and defend himself the best he could before haewon chuckled , and pulled the little girl onto her lap to pull her attention away from him .
“ he’s not a knight , sweetling . just another nobleman ... “ though it was hard to deny considering river’s own choice in clothing , his black robes exchanged for a downgrade that was still undeniable of the freshness of his fabric . it didn’t help that he always carried himself with his shoulders back and scanned every possible exit in case they needed to make a quick escape . “ see ? he’s carrying it around just as protection in case we meet some bad men on the road . i guess you could say he’s my knight since he’s my own protector , “ she joked along trying to fulfill the girl’s fantasies without breaking her own cover . “ he’s actually boring , if you ask me . nothing like a real knight would be . he isn’t out there fighting dragons and climbing towers to rescue his princess from all the evil monsters locking her away . but you know what he can do ? “ she mused out loud as she pulled the girl more into her lap , loving the way her eyes shone as haewon spoke . “ he’s a wonderful dancer who likes to bring me flowers who is very handsome . so in my eyes , that makes him a prince , not a knight . what do you think ? does he look like a prince ? “
“ he is handsome , “ the girl said , now staring at river like he was really a prince haewon had described him as .
River managed to compose himself and reached over to pat the girl on the top of her head in amusement . “ this prince isn’t fighting off any dragons , unless you could the squirrels that try to steal our food as a dragon . “
“ are their dragons where you came from ? “ she asked . “ mother tells me stories sometimes about the monsters from other kingdoms and how they burn down castles and how the knights always kill them . is that true ? “
Haewon laughed , and shifted slightly so the little girl was sitting between her and river and wondering if parents still told those types of fairytale stories anymore , or if haewon should be feeding into them . it wasn’t as though her own fairytale princess life was going well , though there was nothing wrong with wanting to protect the child from the real world a little longer , then it wouldn’t hurt.
“ no dragons , “ she said , much to the disappointment of the girl who once more looked upset . “ but do you know what we do have ? wolves . “
“ werewolves ? “ she asked .
“ yes . big ones . “ haewon ignored the look river gave her from over his meal , partially a warning if she was about to reveal their secret , which she never would , or if she was about to double down on her teasing .
“ are they scary ? do they hurt the princess ? “
“ no . quite the opposite , “ she quickly refuted . “ they’re werewolves that only turn when they have to . they’re strong , fast , and they heal quick when they’re injured . they have the most important job to do in the kingdom . you see , they could use their secret to hurt people and take power , but they don’t . they protect the royal family instead and in return , the king and queen protect their secret . there aren’t that many werewolves left because bad people tried to kill them all , but there’s a few left . they say you can hear their howling every month on the full moon , and that’s when the kingdom is at its strongest . “
“ have you ever seen one before ? “
Haewon lifted her head to peek at river . “ yes i have . they’re magnificent creatures . fiercely loyal . “
The little girl gasped at the new information , looking ready to bounce off the bench from the excitement of a small story that would certainly fuel more stories to be told later among the other children . haewon had noticed the number of kids running around the inns grounds since their arrival the night before , though rather than grow upset from the constant sounds of scurrying and loud speaking , she found it charming that a village would let them freely roam and have their fun .
As the little girl scurried away to join the rest of her friends as they called her over , haewon scooted back beside river so they could finish their meal and prepare for another day of riding to wherever would house them safely next . the traveling days all seemed to blend together , and it was getting harder for her to track which kingdoms they were residing in temporarily when many of them didn’t have their flags raised outside every building .
“ magnificent ? “ river repeated amused .
“ i meant what i said . besides , watching how happy she got listening about it was worth it , “ she said with a longing look to the girl as she and her friends all ran outside . “ children should be able to daydream about stuff like that for as long as they can . i loved it when my maids told me stories about dragons and knights , it made growing up in a castle more bearable . “ she glanced down , breaking from her trance to his sword that stuck out so obviously amongst the other men in the room . “ she was right , though . you do look like a knight . if we’re blending in , at least ... loosen your posture or something . you stick out too much ... both of us do . “ she hadn’t realized how much attention they must have been drawing in with their disguises , and wondered if staying in the village another day would give them a chance to find better outfits that would help them blend in . all it would take is one more child asking if she was a princess for them to inevitably get recognized at the wrong time .
And haewon wasn’t ready to leave the village yet . it was the first time on their journey that she felt safe enough to stay another day , maybe scope out the area and decide if settling for a few months would be a more fulfilling option than continuing on running for the rest of their lives . the people seemed accommodating and friendly , and while they’d had a few stares simply from their choice in clothing , no one seemed to mind them any business . the kids roamed freely . it seemed far enough from any large castles or manors that it would be the furthest from any possible battles or war , which was the safest she’d felt since fleeing baekje all those weeks ago .
River seemed to consider the option . his years of training , on top of his dedication to protect haewon above all else , he’d never took any chances when it came to their safety and had run so far and so quickly baekje’s downfall hadn’t reached their location . he pursed his lips and looked frustrated at the idea of staying anywhere longer than necessary , but after haewon pouted and the light seemed to fade from her eyes , he let out a long sigh . “ fine . another few days won’t hurt . “
It started with searching for a seamstress . unlike the luxuries she had at the castle , with plenty of ladies letting haewon pick the finest silks and take her measurements with the upmost care , she had to settle on a small shop with an even smaller collection of dresses with fabrics that were much cheaper than her silks and a style different from a royal’s . she felt oddly exposed with her tie up corset and shorter sleeve , and river looked even more out of place in a casual outfit he could’ve pulled off if he hadn’t been so determined to find a way to still sheath his sword on his belt .
“ you can’t keep it on you , “ she tried to convince him like trying to pull a child from it’s mother . river returned the same pout she’d given him earlier when she reached to take it from him , the weight of it heavy that she almost dropped it , and him catching it with a bit of a glare how she’d nearly lost something so precious . “ fine ! “ she exclaimed with her hands above her head and scoffing out . “ you can carry it back to the inn , but you can’t hold on to it while we’re here . you’ll scare the villagers and the kids ... and it looks awful in that outfit . “ he still hadn’t stopped glaring at her , his silence enough of an answer as his grip tightened around the handle as if he was unwilling to separate himself from his father’s gifted weapon .
It had taken more convincing than she thought for it to be left behind at the inn . haewon also set aside her old dress and checked the crown jewels of her father in the small pouch hidden beneath the loose floorboards , and as a remaining measure , even separated herself from her father’s ring she’d kept on a small string around her neck beneath her front . she’d taken river’s outstretched hand and left behind the old pieces of their life to explore a potential new one in the village .
The weather was warm and pleasant . her skin soaked in the sun after weeks of riding through cloudy days and rainy weather , and the ache in her legs from riding for so long seemed to ease with the walking . rumors had spread quickly from the little girl at the inn of the noble couple passing through , village people peeking out of their small shops trying to catch a glimpse of them , all greeting haewon and river warmly with waves and invitations to discuss their travels . the girls had quickly learned of the handsome man’s arrival and haewon swore she heard them whisper about him , stifling her laughter as heads peeked from the shops windows at the giggles that followed .
“ you changed ! “
Haewon and river’s walk was stopped as the same little girl from earlier jumped out in front of them and pointed again at their new choice of clothing .
“ why did you change ? “ she asked , hands going out to touch the much less finer fabrics and frowning when it didn’t feel as soft as the silks did earlier she’d admired so much . “ and where is your sword ? “ she turned to river with the same accusational tone for as small as she was , her voice was quite powerful . “ my brothers were excited to see it ! “
Her little feet stomped on the dirt road , little puffs from the settled dust lifting back into the air again adorably that made haewon smile . “ what’s your name ? “ she asked . “anna . “ haewon lowered herself down to her level , and brushed away the little bit of dust that had settled onto the top of her head . “ and do you always run around by yourself , anna ? where are your parents ? “ a tiny hand lifted and pointed to the biggest house in the center of the village , then fell to start playing with haewon’s hair now that it was level with her shorter stature . “ your parents are the lord and lady of the village , are they ? “ she asked , anna nodding in response . “ so you know the village quite well then ? why don’t you show us around ? “ haewon opened her own hand , offering it to the girl and smiling as she took it .
Soon enough , they were sat by the small pond with anna in her lap and anna’s brothers hanging from river’s arms trying to goad him into a fight to prove he really was a knight and not some nobleman accompanying his new bride on a journey through the realm . haewon noted the other families gathered around to enjoy the pleasant afternoon as if something so casual was an everyday occurrence there; between the laughter of the children and the birds singing from the above trees , she didn’t think a life this peaceful was common outside of the castle .
River’s grunt and eventual overdramatic yell came over when he allowed himself to get tackled by the two brothers who yelped in excitement from overtaking the grown man . the boys proudly claimed themselves victorious and grabbed some sticks off the ground as makeshift swords and pretended to attack river again while he was still down , the playful scene making the princess soften , and the part of her that had died weeks ago seemed to warm back up again as it came back to life .
“ you look sad , “ anna commented as she watched haewon’s expression change at the unfolding scene .
“ i’m not sad . i’m actually very happy , anna , “ she said with a touch to the child’s nose . “ we’ve been travelling for a long time and it’s nice to settle in for a few days to relax while meeting some nice people . “
“ then you should move here ! “ anna happily suggested and stood from haewon’s lap to prove her point . the princess stood short after , bending down to scoop the child up in her arms and carry her with . river decided to follow and had one of the boys hanging on his leg with the other slung over his shoulder , still in the middle of their brawl .
“ we’re here for a few days . why don’t we enjoy our time together with what we have ? “ she suggested , anna’s disappointment clear but accepting as she rested her head on haewon’s shoulder , and allowed herself to be carried all the way home where the children were safely dropped off at the lord’s manor so the couple could enjoy some more time together .
They’d started their way back to the inn to care for the stallion when haewon paused at a familiar scent wafting through the air . lilacs -- her mother’s favorite scent , and haewon’s favorite flower . it was coming from a wooden shop they stood right outside of , naturally following the scent a finding herself in a somewhat familiar scene that had her tearing up . dried flowers from baekje hung from the ceiling . there were large bottles on the shelves filled with oils had been dusted over from age , some of the petals floating inside as they continued to seep their fragrance into the essence . some fresh flowers remained in a water filled vase , though most of the bouquets couldn’t have survived such a long journey and even though most of them had wilted , haewon searched through the shop trying to find the lilacs .
“ haewon . “ river’s soft voice from behind had her turning to find the knight holding one of them out to her . it had been wilted , appearing as it had dead for days and the white petals barely holding onto the stem as even just the movement of taking it from the vase had one of them falling to the ground and joining the various colored petals on the wooden floor . the loose stem flopped in her hand , though she held it close to her chest and admired what remained .
She wondered what had become of baekje . if the fire extended from the castle to the surrounding gardens , if the farmers of her kingdom had been affected , if her people were safe . if whoever had instigated the attack decided to keep baekje for themselves and bask in the fortunes of the fertile soil and continue to let her kingdom thrive in her absence , or if they’d let their precious flowers die .
River noticed her sudden shift in mood and lifted under her chin , wiping away one of the brewing tears and held her cheek . he kissed her forehead assuringly , silently stepping away to the counter and buying a small bottle of the same scented oil she’d always wear . it seemed pointless to buy anything as luxurious as oils when they were supposed to be on the run , but the small reminder of home was too precious for her to pass .
The lilac was limp and already dead by the time they’d returned to the inn that night . haewon scurried around the room hoping to find something to preserve it , any book , and loose pages that were floating around , settling on leaving it by the window where hopefully the morning sun would take the last of the moisture and allow the petals to be preserved permanently .
“ i saved every flower you brought me , “ she said as the silence grew too loud for her to ignore . “ even those dead roses you picked outside the gates when there was the uprising . i pressed them between my books . if i could , i would tell the glaziers they were ones i found in the gardens and have them set in glass so i could keep them with me in my chambers as decoration . whenever you were away , i’d look over them and think of you , as i knew you’d come back with more . “ she could feel herself begin to tear up again , the weeks of running having made her numb that she hadn’t sobbed in weeks . river was right there and already trying to console her , pulling her to his chest and pressing his chin to the top of her head to let her cry if she needed . “ what if they’re all destroyed ? “
“ they’re just flowers , haewon ,” he tried to tell her , despite him knowing the deeper meaning behind every one he’d brought her and why he’d continued to bring them even after her engagement in secret . for what he’d never been able to properly tell her , he’d done by gifting her the pieces of baekje that made their kingdom special as a constant reminder for his feelings for her . to anyone else , they might have been a simple gift , but to her , they were all symbolic gestures of his love she’d treasure forever .
The sounds of music coming from outside the window drew her attention away from her grief , along with the blazes of a large fire and people singing . the village seemed to be having a gathering in the center of town , big enough that the sounds of it reached the outskirts to their inn . haewon wasn’t in much of a dancing mood as she kept her face tucked in river’s chest and let out a deep breath to calm herself down ; perhaps it was the sight of the large flames causing the shadows to reflect on the walls that caused her to feel the sudden unease , much too familiar of the final sight of her home going up in the same light .
“ we should go join them , “ river tried to convince her as haewon shook her head . “ we shouldn’t spend the remainder of our night up here feeling sad . why would we waste a happy day to end it like this ? the whole village is probably out there dancing and wondering why we’re not there joining them , and you love dancing . “
“ it’s not the type of dancing either of us are accustomed to , “ she tried to argue , more trying to convince herself than him as she wiped at her face to rid of the tears .
“ it might not be . but it’s us , isn’t it ? we can go out there and recreate the awful dancing we did when we were teenagers and you were teaching me how to move without stepping on your feet . “ river took a step back , haewon frowning at the bit of distance between them , watching as he fell into a deep bow reminiscent of the ones he used with her in the grand hall of the castle as a formal invitation to dance . “ princess , “ he said , peeking up with a smirk so uniquely river it still brought that little flutter in the pit of her stomach . “ would you like to dance ? “
She didn’t give him a verbal answer as she pressed back to his front and grabbed his hand while extending their arms out to the side as she fell into a simple step , hardly considered dancing with how haewon’s head rested on his shoulder as they swayed with the echoes of the much lighthearted , faster step played that required a much different dance . while it didn’t match , it was enough to pull haewon from her grief as river kissed the top of her head and did a very gentle spin .
“ anna will be wondering why you’re not there , “ he tried convincing again , knowing what a gentle spot haewon already developed for the lord’s daughter .
“ she’s very sweet , “ haewon agreed . “ i hope one day she’ll be as beloved by the villagers as they are now . “
River peeked down at the little smile haewon started to form . he chuckled , deciding to move into another gentle spin . this time when he pulled her back in , he welcomed her back into his arms and tucked her head under his chin . “ you’ve always been good with children . “ he sighed , stealing a glance outside the window where a few of the dancing families could be seen in view as the music continued on . “ i like it here . it’s so different from we grew up in the castle with the finest luxuries in the kingdom . even a little outsider like me was treated better than most of the people here were thanks to the king . it makes me wonder how differently my life might have been if father decided to remain in his village before becoming a soldier . “
“ what would you have liked to your life to be ? “ she asked , amused at the prospect of river being anything other than a knight with his skill and pride .
“ i don’t know . maybe a blacksmith ? stable boy . something a lot less stressful than a soldier or sellsword where i could come home to my family every night and not have to worry about the possibility of getting killed every time i leave , “ he chuckled .
Haewon tried to imagine it ; river coming home in the same outfit he had on , maybe covered in soot from working with metals or near a fire , always smiling , doting on his children after a long days work . the image was appealing , but entirely unrealistic for either one of them to have a life so simple when fate had decided theirs already .
“ would you want that ? “ she asked him . there was a tone of seriousness in her question , meeting his eyes and slowly coming to a stop in their dance for him to really consider his answer . should they both grow tired of running , if rumors of baekje reached them that the castle had been destroyed and the kingdom fell to ruins , if whoever ruined her family’s reign decided to keep it for themselves , and there was truly no point in fighting , would settling somewhere be something they wanted ? she’d rather confine herself to a false identity and live with river here peacefully for the rest of her life than fight a losing battle , or safely hide forever if it meant escape with their lives . her question wasn’t just out of curiosity ; she asked it as an offer , a silent proposal to him that if he agreed , perhaps they could change their fate entirely .
Fingers dipped below her chin to keep their gazes locked , and the lightest touch to her lips . “ any life i have with you , princess , is the only one that i want , whether it be as villagers , as wanderers , or as a knight under your leadership . “ her head was lifted more , river leaning down to press a gentle kiss to her lips and letting it linger long enough for haewon to melt into him once more , foreheads pressed , and eyes closed as they let the moment settle into silence . “ i’ll always be by your side . but should fate decide to have your rightful place as queen , i ask you make your own oath to me , now , here , that you’ll never push me aside and pick another . in whatever life we decide together , it will be as husband and wife . i’ll watch another kingdom burn before watching you swear to another man again . “
Haewon’s hand lifted to wrap around the bottom of his thumb and wrist , holding his grasp to her face longer and nodding . it wasn’t a single moment of contemplation in her answer ; he was her only reason left living in such a miserable existence in these past weeks , her only person that could pull her from her dark thoughts ; the dedicated he had to protecting his princess , haewon felt the same to keep living , not for herself , but for him .
“ i need you to promise it to me , haewon , “ he whispered , eyes closed , as if it pained him not to hear her speak right away .
“ i promise . “ her hand lifted once more , pressing her fingers over her heart and sealing it as an oath , not having released river’s hand as his own now felt the erratic beating through her chest . his fingers tightened over hers , and he kissed her once more , this time more deeper than the last as the fire outside the inn window blazed bigger and hotter than before as the music’s tempo grew faster . she barely noticed it , now .
“ that’s all i’ve ever wanted , haewon , was to see you safe , happy , and to be mine ... i don’t care where or how . just be mine forever . “ her grip tightened around his fingers . her heart skipped a beat .
“ always and forever . “
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