Out Of The Frying Pan And Into The Spider Verse

Dungeons and dragons and having a girlfriend are my only personality traits.

[intothefryingpan]

say what you will about being an adult sucking but at least I can go to ikea and buy the Blåhaj shark and he can sit on my bed with Chester the possum as emotional support while I’m sobbing my way through computational astrophysics

[intothefryingpan]

Matthew Mercer watches over me from my downloads folder. I’ve tried to remove him, he will not leave. He presides over my laptop activities, a kind and benevolent force that holds me accountable.

[handsomeboymodelingschool]

HATE languages

- Physical violence

- Acts of disservice

- Words of malice

- Gift removing

- Wretched time

[intothefryingpan]

These are all excellent love languages as well

[intothefryingpan]

Magical Item:

Uno Reverse card with one (1) use of Counterspell attached to it

[intothefryingpan]

“Goodnight, enjoy your Space Wars” she says.

“My whAT” I respond

“Star Battles”

“Please stop”

“Galaxy conflicts”

Please for the love of Pedro Pascal himself someone help me before I commit an irrevocable act of provoked violence I’m sobbing

[intothefryingpan]

A real genuine text I received from my lovely girlfriend at 4:50 am:

🚽 can be our ✨ always ✨

[intothefryingpan]

“How. Can you come into my home. Steal another man’s Pepis. And not even finish it.”

My girlfriend, upon picking up a half empty Pepsi can from the kitchen table that our friend left behind.

[intothefryingpan]

Out of context quotes from my girlfriend in the last two days:

“Hashtag Eel Appeal”

“I will Never Forgive you if you behead my eel.”

[intothefryingpan]

I was starting on some Argo Keene fanart but my gf made me stop and I’m not allowed to continue work on it beyond this point because it has “bibble energy” and I’ll only ruin it

[intothefryingpan]

Artwork of my new Dnd character i hope u like it he’s a bard

[intothefryingpan]

Got bored decided to do an extra doodle of him i know it’s not as good as the og Art but

[intothefryingpan]

Artwork of my new Dnd character i hope u like it he’s a bard

[intothefryingpan]

Nothing like falling asleep on the couch to the sounds of your 20 year old girlfriend playing Webkinz (on a 13 year old account that she SOMEHOW remembered the password for immediately) next to you

[intothefryingpan]

In reference to one of her pets: “I assigned Spiffy “female” at purchase but there’s no way that’s a girl. Look at him. Spiffy is DEFINITELY trans. ... Why am I making all my Webkinz gay?”

[intothefryingpan]

6:30 am. I woke up. She’s not here anymore but she’s still awake. I ask her “how long?” “I plead the fifth” she says. How long. Was she playing Webkinz?

[bysaestyl]

i love being dm. it means i can ask the most innocuous questions totally unprompted to my players like “hey what’s your bard’s swimming speed?” and get this reaction every time

[quasikool]

“You touch it? Ok cool. Remind me, who is your God?”

[intothefryingpan]

Nothing like falling asleep on the couch to the sounds of your 20 year old girlfriend playing Webkinz (on a 13 year old account that she SOMEHOW remembered the password for immediately) next to you

[intothefryingpan]

In reference to one of her pets: “I assigned Spiffy “female” at purchase but there’s no way that’s a girl. Look at him. Spiffy is DEFINITELY trans. ... Why am I making all my Webkinz gay?”

[intothefryingpan]

Nothing like falling asleep on the couch to the sounds of your 20 year old girlfriend playing Webkinz (on a 13 year old account that she SOMEHOW remembered the password for immediately) next to you

[intothefryingpan]

I was left alone with my roommate for too long and THIS is the nightmare we’ve created so y’all can just go ahead and delete me now it’s for the best

[intothefryingpan]

Hi, just your friendly neighborhood paladin here. Careful though, I fight.