I N Tea P

THINK OUTSIDE THE RIGHT RECTANGULAR PARALLELEPIPED

[intp-hufflepuff]

IS IT TOO MUCH TO ASK?!?

INTP: Tinder is a cesspool of the worst members of the human species.

INTP: However...

INTP: I am bored.

INTP: And I want attention.

ENFJ: And the problem is...?

INTP: I don't want this attention though.

INTP: I just want to run into a beautiful guy at the grocery store and fall instantly a mutually in love. Is that really too much to ask?

ENFJ: ...

ENFJ: How many rom coms have you read in the past week?

INTP: Only the whole Bridgerton series but hear me out...

[intp-hufflepuff]

ISFJ Tries to Steal an Apple Slice

ISFJ: You almost cut my finger off!

ISFP: *Waving butcher knife wildly* Why is your finger in my knife area???

[intp-hufflepuff]

Humor Styles

ENFJ: We were just deciding what everyone's type of humor is. For example, ESTP is physical comedy with a splash of sarcasm thrown in.

ESTP: ENFJ is Buffy-style wit.

INTP: Checks out. What's my humor style?

ENFJ: It's saying unexpectedly brutal things in a peppy, enthusiastic tone, sometimes with dance moves for emphasis.

INTP: *offended* What?

ESTP: Yesterday you said, in the same voice you use to talk about dogs and your latest hyperfixation, "I don't understand how anyone can be so fucking stupid."

INTP: To be fair, only a moron sets the wrong answer as correct on a question they wrote, every single week.

ENFJ: You once said, "He just has so many feelings" then did a backwards somersault and jazz hands.

INTP: I see your point...

[intp-hufflepuff]

A woman walks alone down the street...

ESTP: Some dude just followed me home from the grocery store and I turned around and asked him if he was following me and it turned out he's just our neighbor. Never let me leave the house again please.

INTP: I got catcalled in the seedy section of downtown once by two guys and when I didn't respond they followed me six blocks to the train station. I don't know what I would have done if the train hadn't arrived right as I walked up to the stop.

ENFJ: *waving the knife she's using to chop onion* I just turn around and loudly ask if they have a problem because I am scared of no man!

ENFJ: Except every stranger I've ever passed on the street.

[intp-hufflepuff]

Me to My Future Self

If you need my help because I'm ruining everything, don't look at me.

-Michael Scott, "The Office"

[igotthenuggets-deactivated20200]

This is the effect I want to have in my life.

[intp-hufflepuff]

My Rommates During the Niall Horan Concert

After two bottles of wine and a few tequila shots... INTP & ESTP: Dancing in the living room and screaming along to all the songs ISFJ: Dancing to the beat but doesn't know any of the words ESFJ: Snuck off into the kitchen to do shots alone because no one else is hardcore enough BONUS: After the concert snapchatted a video of us to ENFJ to tell her how much we love her ❤

[intp-hufflepuff]

My newest quarantine hobby is getting drunk with my roommates and trying to figure out their Myers-Briggs types. In addition to my INTP we have: ENFJ ISFJ ESFJ ESTP ENTJ (ISFJ's girlfriend who technically doesn't live with us but lives alone and has been quarantining with us) This segment was so fun my roommate (ENFJ) has been trying to figure out everyone's enneagrams.

[intp-hufflepuff]

I am a student who currently has no source of income. My summer internship is still up-in-the-air due to the pandemic (although I am so thankful it still might happen!!!) and I Can't Stop Buying Books. The fact that my savings is dwindling so low is causing so much anxiety, but also these stories I love so much and forcing them on various family members I am quarantining with are the only things bringing me joy right now...

[intp-hufflepuff]

For anyone else out there going through a rough time: You are seen. You are loved. You have made more of a difference in the lives of those around you than you will ever know. Today might be hard, and tomorrow might be harder. But keep going and sharing your light because there are brighter times ahead. 💛

[intp-hufflepuff]

My special skill is snoozing my alarm the perfect amount of times so I go from enough time to shower, eat breakfast, and relax to just enough time to get ready and still make it to class right before the professor starts talking.

[intp-hufflepuff]

Parker the Daring Jumping Spider

The other day I went in my closet to get dressed, and I saw a dark spot on my ceiling that isn’t normally there. I looked up and it wasn’t a dark spot, it was a huge spider. One of those big, muscley-looking armored ones that look like they were designed to spit acid in your face and take their time digesting you. And the worst part is it had these two glowing green eyes. Demon spider, in my closet. 

I calmly, slowly, squatted down and grabbed a shoe. Because my ceilings are lofted I can’t reach them, even standing on my desk chair, so I took a deep breath and I threw that shoe as hard as I could at the spider. 

I missed. 

Aaaaaaand the spider disappeared. 

I noped out of there as fast as possible, slammed my closet door shut, grabbed enough clothes for the weekend, and headed out of town to pay a surprise visit to my parents because there was no way in hell I was staying one more minute in that room with a pissed off demon spider lurking in my closet, waiting for me to fall asleep so he could come out and eat me. 

You know how they say absence makes the heart grow fonder? Well, I didn’t necessarily become fond of this spider, but I started feeling a little bad about trying to kill him. Especially once I looked up “giant spider glowing green eyes” images and found out he was a daring jumping spider, which don’t bite and are terrified of humans. 

I’ve also read that names make you feel more attached to things. So, I decided to name the spider Parker. Sitting safely in my childhood bedroom, miles away from this spider, I was certain Parker and I could coexist. Plus, if you look at the picures, he’s even a little cute. And those glowing green eyes aren’t actually eyes (cause spiders have eight of those) they’re reflective spots above the mandibles. So he’s not actually a demon spider. 

Anyway, the weekend ended and I was feeling really good walking back up the stairs to my room. Then I saw it. The dark spot on the upper corner of my door, jammed between the frame and the door. Parker. 

“Hiiiiiiiii, Parker,” I said very hesitantly, feeling the panic set back in. “How was your weekend, buddy? Parker. I’ve named you, so no I’m attached. We’re buddies. You’re going to be my new pet.”

But I couldn’t do it. That attachment that had felt so real in my car had completely dissipated, and now all I could see was these glowing green demon eyes and giant armored legs blocking my way into my room. 

This house was not big enough for both of us. 

So I lifted my foot up, and I slipped off a shoe. And I ever so slowly, crept towards the door. Cause I knew that if I moved too fast, Parker was going to jump at me. And according to google, he could jump up to four feet. So I got into that range, moving so carefully so I didn’t startle him. And then I took that shoe and I struck. 

There was the most disgusting cracking sound, and I was crying so I couldn’t see if he was dead so I just kept hitting the door and hoping hoping hoping that I got him. And I don’t know if I was crying because I was absolutely terrified of this animal that was smaller than the first knuckle of my thumb or crying because I killed Parker, who was going to be my pet but also scared the shit out of me. 

So that was my weekend. 

[intp-hufflepuff]

Jack Skellington and I Are the Same Person

When watching “Nightmare Before Christmas” I always really relate to Jack Skellington. Everyone thinks that’s weird, because I act nothing like Jack Skellington other than having an obsession with Christmas. That’s because I have a very unhealthy Fe that often manifests in the form of me taking on the personality I think a group wants me to be. So the last time I watched the movie, I took notes on all the reasons I relate to the character, and here are the results.

* Jack’s boredom with routine, and feeling like he’s playing a role for everyone else

I relate to this so much, the whole wanting more than who he is an what he does, I experience that every day. 

* The entire song “What’s This?” 

Anytime something new comes along. Hamilton, MBTI, cosmology, Frank Lloyd Wright, etc. 

* Striving for logical consistency

Always. How does this fit into my current understanding of the world? How does this expand upon what I already know?

* Becoming blind to suggestion once he believes logical consistency is achieved

This is literally why I never call myself an expert at anything. Because as soon as that expert title comes out, I stop paying attention to what anyone else thinks because obviously, I know best. It’s happened before, and it takes a serious wakeup call to pull me out of this mode. 

* Having trouble communicating ideas to large groups

and

* Filtering his ideas to “give them what they want” because they clearly aren’t going to understand anyway

I do have this problem, and it’s something I need to work on. Oftentimes, logic flows I think are perfectly logical seem convoluted or unintelligible to others. The result of this is I often adapt my thoughts and present them in a way that doesn’t fully communicate what I am trying to, but makes some sense to the group.

* Not having too much trouble changing his ideas in the end once contradictory information is presented

If I am wrong, I don’t feel too bad because I wasn’t too attached to the idea anyway. It’s not about the ideas but the whole they add up to that matters.

Okay, so after making this list, with all the commonalities between me, an INTP, and Jack Skellington, I decided to try and type him to see if he actually is an INTP. 

There are a lot of conflicting opinions on the internet, but here’s why I’ve concluded he is an INTP.

1. He clearly has Ne high in his stack. That is a universal agreement.

2. I would say Jack’s inferior function is Fe because he does have that trouble relating to the crowd. In the town assembly scene, he clearly is having trouble getting his ideas across, which is likely thanks to his scatterbrained Ne being his way of extraverting his ideas. And instead of making sure they truly understand what he’s trying to say, he caves in and gives them what they want. That’s not a healthy use of Fe.

3. This is enough to make him an INTP, but for all those people who do think he is an ENTP, I stand by my conclusion his dominant function is Ti. The entire time, he’s striving for logical consistency. He actually says it multiple times throughout the movie. “There’s got to be a logical way to explain this Christmas thing!” He uses his Ne to explore all possibilities so he can be confident in his logical conclusion. He uses his Ne to aid his Ti, not the other way around. 

So, that’s why I think Jack Skellington is an INTP, and also why INTPs make such good supervillains. Cause the entire time they think they know best. :) Thanks for reading!

[intp-hufflepuff]

I'm just minding my own business eating a burrito and out of nowhere I hear my sister in the other room whisper to the dog, "We stan a chubby legend" and honestly???

[intp-hufflepuff]

ENTP: Someone should invent something so the middle of your taco doesn't fall out the back while you're eating.

INTP: ... Like a burrito???

[intp-musing]

INTP Confession # 6

One time my friend asked why I don’t like wearing skirts or tank/crop tops out in public and only wear them indoors. I decided to say whatever came to mind first which was, “I like being forgettable. You tend to not notice the unattractive girl wearing glasses, baggy clothes, and no make up. I like keeping to myself and societies standards make it so much easier to do. Standing out makes me uncomfortable because I hate the feeling of eyes on me.”

Don’t get me wrong, occasionally I like dressing up and feeling pretty, but it’s a thing I do for myself. If doing it in front of others makes me uncomfortable, why do it? Nothing is forcing me to look pretty for others, so I don’t. Besides, it’s too much work and I don’t have enough motivation for it.

[intp-hufflepuff]

This! I reblog the HECK out of this!!! EVERYONE should be required to read this post!

It’s something people don’t really understand, but they definitely need to be made aware of. I don’t need your version of validation. In fact, please keep your validation to yourself, because nine times out of ten it’s going to hurt waaaaay more than it helps. 

I love dressing up. I love dresses and skirts and always have, to the point that my 1st grade teacher actually asked me, “Do you own a pair of pants?” But I hardly ever do it now, and it’s not because it takes too much energy and effort to do. It’s because it takes too much energy and effort to wear in public. 

Anytime I do it, people comment, Stupid stuff like, "Where are YOU going today?" and "Who are you getting so dressed up for? (*insert suggestive winky faces here*)"  And, guys are far more likely to catcall me. I am not doing this for someone else, I’m doing this for me. I’m doing this because this is an outfit I enjoy and I feel good in. I wish people understood that. 

And  an unintentional consequence of dressing up is that people are less likely to take me seriously. I am a woman training to enter a male-dominated field, and my personal favorite experience (read: the most embarrassing moment of my entire life) is when my male professor made a joke about swiping left on something that no one laughed at. He looked at us and went, "Well, most of you are nerds, so you probably don’t get too much action on Tinder. But YOU know what I'm talking about." And he put both hands on my desk and looked right at me. He even winked, like we were sharing some sort of joke. 

It was the first day of the term, and I never sat in the front row of his class again. I have never used an online dating app, and I don’t think I ever will just because I prefer to know people well before I start dating them. But regardless of whether I’ve used one or not, this professor made an assumption about me based solely on what I looked like. It didn’t matter to him that I’m studying one of the most difficult subjects out there. It didn’t matter to him that I have a 4.0 GPA. All that mattered to him is that I was wearing a skirt. 

And the worst part is, I think he meant it as a compliment. it just made me so frustrated cause crap like this happens to girls all the time. I can’t wear makeup or do my hair, or even look remotely cute because people (classmates, coworkers, professors) write me off as pretty, as if that takes away from my intelligence. I mean, I worked three months with my boss last summer, and in my last week I was having a conversation about astrophysics (I get really geeky about astrophysics) with one of the other interns and my boss goes "Wait, what? Are you a closet nerd???" And I didn’t even know how to respond to that. I’m not a closet nerd, I’m a full on nerd. It’s not something I’ve ever tried to hide. But it’s something people often miss because they don’t look past what’s on the surface. The thing is, I love learning. I love having debates about interesting topics. I love hearing about what other people are passionate about, because I get passionate about it too. But it takes a special kind of person to be able to look past the pretty and see that. 

To all the men out there: respect my intelligence, not what I’m wearing. 

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk. 

[intp-hufflepuff]

My INTJ Dad: *off camera* Say "I love you and goodnight!"

My ESTJ Grandpa: *on camera* I will not! The more you say "I love you" the less meaning it has.

My INTJ Dad: Well THAT'S not how it works.