Unlike most people, INTPs do not come pre-programmed with acceptable social behaviour patterns. Rather, they learn to fit in through conscious observation and deliberate mimicry.
While other people talk, the INTP watches and wonders. They observe what a person did and figure out what they should do as a response.
Widening their sight, nodding, and smiling, the INTP responded with a fake social skill.
Like actors on a stage set, INTPs are playing a role. They know that being true to themselves doesn't fit too well with average people, they slowly accumulate a little acting knowledge to help them get by.
INTPs could be described as a human chameleon or a mirror. If a person is friendly, funny, boisterous, and waves their hands around a lot, the INTP will start gesticulating, speak in a louder voice, and smile and joke more to match the other’s behaviour.
And when the person is finally gone, they will turn into their typical self which often is silent, aloof and nonchalant, and slowly cocoon themselves inside their room.
Most of the time this mimicry is unconscious and is basically the result of playing a role deeply enough that it becomes embedded. Chameleons don’t have to think about changing their skin colour to match leaves and branches--it just happens.
Not that INTPs are good actors. They only act because they have to, and only put forth as much effort as is required to get by. An INTP, for example, does not have a giant palette of varied emotional responses that seem totally genuine. Instead, they are controlling their bodies like a puppet-master controls a puppet, and the resulting clumsy imitation of reality is just not lifelike. But it’s enough to get by, as long as there isn’t too much pressure.
If the pressure increases or the situation warrants it, however, an INTP will switch back to their regular selves for as long as necessary, perhaps stunning their acquaintances with a display of cool, clear, cogitant reasoning.
(The secret life of INTP- Anna Moss)
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