“Don’t mind, don’t mind…” Retorting playfully as he lifted his hands up and showed her that no harm was done, he knew that it was her job to keep up a pretty little facade full of lies for her father – one reason more to hate that guy – but in no way, shape or form was he blaming her. All he offered was his kindness and openness so she could bond with someone. Hell, that girl hardly had any friends, he never saw anyone visiting her, he never saw anyone talking to her, calling her (and it may have been creepy just how attentive he was about Koutarou, but still) – it worried him that she was rotting away like a singing bird in a golden cage. Surely, someone had to reach out a hand to her and be a good friend, right? As much as he loved her in a more romantic sense, he would not turn down the idea to be her best friend in dire times, even if it meant watching her go with another man by her side…
It changed the whole atmosphere once she called him ‘Tooji’ as he asked her to. An honest smile appeared on his face, not one that simply was curling the lips up to a more friendly look, no, one that would brighten up your eyes and make them shine as if they had seen the most beautiful thing they could imagine. It made his heart feel so light whenever she was able to call him just Tooji – no honorifics, no respectful distance, just two people being buddy-buddy with each other. He loved it. He really loved it. “There you go… and your father didn’t magically appear in the kitchen after you dropped the honorific on me either, now did he?” It was in his nature to tease her more and more, though he moved his hand to push against her shoulder playfully, trying to show her that he was merely kidding around. “Would it be too daring to call you Koutarou? Mhm… though… Koutarou-chan has a nice ring to it – it points out just how cute you are. Gotta show a little more respect to you than you to me after all.”
Rolling his eyes upon her comment, he sighed deeply, “Love, I know you don’t drink. Don’t make me explain my joke.” Tooji added then, gesturing with his hand. “Your dad would cut my tongue out if he heard the word ‘sex’ being mentioned around you, so I’d rather not go into detail about my stupid pun there, heh…” Of course, he was aware that she had gotten the gist of it —- but sometimes he just loved to push the limits a little further and test the waters. As much as she tried to be unreachable and a mystery, he could read her expressions like a book – and each and every single time the story was thrilling him anew.
“Ah-ah… I was not wandering off… I excused myself to get a smoke… I mean… it’s a long smoke now, isn’t it…” Looking at his wrist-watch, he snickered to himself. “I wouldn’t wander off, your old man has some beef with me…” Smacking his flat hand on his damaged knee, he looked down at it before he’d keep talking. “If it wasn’t for Naruko… I guess… he would’ve gotten rid of me. A slow, limping Yakuza is a useless Yakuza… don’t you think so too?” Of course, it was a rhetorical question altogether – he knew that she had barely an idea of what was going on behind closed doors, when his father called in the man to talk business with them. And as much as Kanzaki wanted to protect her, too, he guessed it would only be fair to let her in on some facts so she would not believe every single lie like a naive child. But he also respected that she did not want to know all of it —- if he had a choice, he would back out, too. It was far too late now, anyway.
“HA-HAH!” Pressing his chest out victoriously as the smaller agreed upon wanting to see his tricks. “You’ll be mesmerised, guaranteed. Too bad I didn’t bring my cards with me tonight…” The man added with regret in his voice, looking a little gloomy about it —- it would’ve been a perfect chance to spend more time with her, really. But who would’ve thought that he was able to have some one-on-one with that adorable girl?! It must’ve been fate. More so, he was unaware of the girl’s attentive nature towards him as well —- surely, he knew how he felt about her father, his boss – about the situation – if it was not for Naruko, how he’d be dead already. Tooji was not welcome, and neither would he welcome them, except for a few people… he really was unaware that his face bore a certain expression when he had to listen to her father —- though it would not surprise him. What would surprise him however is that Koutarou would notice and comprehend so much; if anything, he considered himself way out of her league… it was no secret that her dad wanted her to marry a Yakuza of high rank, someone who’d ensure her a good life without her needing to move a finger herself… Tooji certainly would not be the one, especially not after his beef with the old man. Arakita had a good chance – so did Naruko… perhaps even Tsuji, if it wasn’t for the fact that he handled the prostitutes… and Kanzaki? He was just a handicapped man who was a thorn in their eyes with his aloof nature and his rebellious heart. Even when looking at her face, aside from their personalities and how kind and gentle she was compared to the man and his past jobs he had done… he was no match next to her. Not nearly as good-looking as Shoukichi…! She really was way out of his league… so, why would she notice him or his quirks at all?!
The moment her eyes looked more terrified than before, he felt his heart sink right into his guts, gulping hard; it was true, he was no saint – nobody was at the Yakuza. While right now, he was gambling with criminals and civilians in order to make money for the organisation, he had a more sinister past behind him. That knee of his was no accident per se. It was a lesson learnt to the guy. His department was under Arakita’s supervision – he used to kidnap people, no matter the age or gender – chloroform ready to knock them out, pull them into a van and bring them into a warehouse before they were sold. Human trafficking. Sometimes even blackmailing families and friends, pressing for money or debts that were needed to be paid to the Yakuza. While Kuroda had been in charge of a hitman, Tooji was in charge of being that creep who abducted humans. Some were random picks, such as young females, who’d be good enough to be sold into prostitution, even handing them over to Tsuji sometimes, if they were good enough (or old enough, for the man really didn’t want anything to do with minors, which he honoured him for), sometimes they were sold to criminals and organisations to further the girls outside of Japan for whatever intention, really. But he also targeted criminals alike to knock them out and torture them in order to gain access to information for the Yakuza – and that fateful night, he had to be vis-à-vis with one of these criminals.
He was not fast enough with his actions, thus getting caught and chased down by that person; Tooji never wore weapons on him back in the days, which he drastically changed thanks to the lesson learnt – but all he could’ve done was running for his life, all the while the van with the other men was driven away to save their own asses. Great team play! But that’s exactly what struck him that night —- there was no brotherhood or team play among Yakuza, just yourself and your own damn life. Luckily (if you could say so), he was shot in his knee and if it was not for Arakita on high-alert, gunning down the opposing criminal, it would’ve been Tooji dead instead. But of course, Yasutomo never let the other live down that experience —- the fact that they had access to important information, and the chance being gone now with the target dead on the ground, it was a big losing streak for their organisation… and a bigger losing streak for Arakita as the head of that department. He never forgave Tooji for that mishap, announced proudly “I will never again work with this mess; he was a useless fuck-up, he is a useless fuck-up and now he will always be a handicapped useless fuck-up!” —- words stung worse than any pain that his destroyed kneecap could’ve given him… and hardly anyone stuck up to him… if Yasuhiro had more of a saying, he had asked for the man to work under his wing… but it was only thanks to Naruko’s influence that he’d still be well and alive. A bad guy? Sure… Tooji was that. He was a bad guy… but he did his time, he got punished for his crime, he felt the remorse each and every single time he looked at Koutarou’s face, the innocent golden hues that would stare at him full of wonder and curiosity, it… it broke his heart. He was a monster trying to make up for his mistakes, and it hurt him to see that fear on her face when he was merely joking around.
Therefore, he dropped that topic — sometimes it was best to bury certain facts and let them rest in peace.
Though, the torture was not over; the moment she grabbed his wrist and looked at him with such naive eyes, he felt a pain strike right into his chest, knotting and furrowing his brows in anguish. He was undeserving of her, really. Not struggling much when she let go of his hand, he felt it sink down, though catching himself mid-thought and reaching out to caress her porcelain cheek gingerly with mere fingertips, as if he was scared to break her if he touched her any more than that. “I’ll protect you from anyone and anything. You have my word on that. You may not trust us Yakuzas which is a smart thing… but I give you my word as Kanzaki Tooji… not as some beat-up push-over of your father’s.” Combing strands of hair and tucking it behind her ear, he gave her a weak smile before taking the offer of the snack. Perhaps he should keep that instead of eating it? Keeping it in his pocket and remembering that night when she had actually offered him a snack with a bright smile on her face, that night she called him ‘Tooji’ – would that be too much? While looking at the snack, it felt as if sadness was washing over him… gulping hard, he really did not want to get sentimental now, it was foolish. Looking at her golden eyes, he tried his best to smile at her. “You should go to your room. I don’t want you to get into trouble, love.”
it was true that ishigaki was incredibly lonely -- she wasn’t necessarily allowed to have any friends, they would only be put in danger unless they were already tied up in her father’s business in one way or another. however, it was very rare for any women to be bothered with these things . . . much less the daughters of men that held no weight in the world. if anything, she was a rarity; a single daughter of a yakuza boss, one who had no other children aside from her. of course, she would be his only daughter for all of time too -- ishigaki’s mother was long out of the picture. she hadn’t been given a detailed explanation on the disappearance of her mother, but she knew that it wa best not to ask questions on the matter. she was content with any little knowledge that her father decided to give her. asking for more would have been seen as ungrateful & unfortunately, her father was her biggest ally at the moment. as harsh as he could be, he was ultimately trying to protect her -- he put a house over her head and fed her. what more could a daughter ask of her father? he may not have been the loving father that most children had, but unlike most children she had an entire barrage of her father’s men ready to die for her at a moment’s notice. if that wasn’t what love felt like, then she didn’t know any other. these men cared about her father’s respect & his daughter’s safety so much that they would be willing to throw their entire life on the line for either one of them. it was more brave than ishigaki would ever be. despite being surrounded by death, the woman was terrified of dying. she’d never been scared of the monsters under her bed or in her closet, but rather the men out for her blood with a vengeance to pay her father.
she couldn’t help but laugh just a bit at tooji’s comment. he was just joking around with her, but she really did think that her father was everywhere. when you had a parent that controlled an entire sub-section of the country, it was hard to believe that he didn’t have control of every single word uttered in his own house. “aaaa, knock it off.” ishigaki said, laughing as she spoke. she gave the man a playful shove, though it didn’t move him far -- if at all. when he brought up dropping the honorific on her name, she wanted to warn him about getting in trouble . . . though, he really did just point out that her dad would not just randomly appear in the kitchen in the first instance. she really didn’t know when to lighten up -- it was somewhat embarrassing. even after his jokes, she still was tense in the shoulders. “i think koutarou-chan is cuter.” she agreed with the man, wanting to help settle his decision. it wasn’t necessarily about the respect for her, it was more that ‘chan’ was often an honorific dropped by close friends. that’s the kind of feeling that she wanted to get from them, that they were close friends.
blinking, ishigaki knew that she shouldn’t have been surprised by the affectionate names that she was called . . . but each time that tooji used them, she found her heart skipping a beat. “oh --” of course she had picked up on generally what he was going for, though she thought that it was merely the name of a drink rather than an innuendo. the smaller didn’t want to ask further into it, since she found saying such a lewd word out loud a bit too scandalous for her tastes. if anything, she avoided talking about such instances at all, she was an unwed woman & didn’t want to be caught speaking of such things with a man she wasn’t even promised to.
huffing at the man’s explanation, she scolded. “you know those are bad for you.” tapping her foot in place of yelling, she placed a light smack to the other’s cheek -- certainly not nearly enough to hurt the man, considering that she wasn’t the strongest of them all. “i thought that you were trying to quit.” despite the fact that she was acting like a mother scolding her child for doing something out of line, she continued to listen to him. ishigaki didn’t know the details -- per usual -- on just what happened to kanzaki, but she could blatantly see that he walked with a limp on the one - side. that damage was easily traced back to something to do with her father, but what exactly it was, she was unaware. “why would you say that?” her big eyes were back to looking him directly in the eye -- instead of looking fearful or anxious, they now looked upset. it hurt her to know that tooji would say such terrible things about himself. “you know, not everything has to be a fight. there is no reason that injury should mean that you are useless.” it felt weird to be lecturing him on this when she truly did know nothing about what the other had to do, or the things that he was involved with. “i know that it’s not my place to speak for you . . . i really don’t know a lot, but you’re still more useful than me. n -- not that it’s hard to be that.“ her brows furrowed in obvious frustration, knowing that there was nothing that she could necessarily say that would hold any weight for tooji. she was like a young child trying to lecture a school teacher on the material.
she figured that the man was trying to buy some time with her by doing card tricks, so she understood the gloomy look that she gave him. but of course, they would be able to see each other other times . . . though, maybe not in such a private situation as this. they were lucky to have a few moments to talk to each other without anyone else around them to monitor the way that they spoke, searching for a reason to be suspicious of their words. “if you come over sometime . . . just stop up and visit me, you’ll know where i am.” she would be hidden up in her room like usual. if he snuck off quietly enough, no one would even know that he was upstairs with the girl rather than loitering around the house for a cigarette, doing nothing. it felt risque to ask the man to visit her in her personal bedroom. hopefully, he wouldn’t take the invitation as an innuendo for inappropriate things -- she truly had the most innocent intent in her invitation. “just please make sure that no one sees you. y -- you know why.” ishigaki’s face turned slightly red as she explained it to him. tooji was not a man that she necessarily had to tell that to, but . . . she felt as if sharing it in order to look out for him & for her was best.
the girl could see it in his eyes, the way that he noticed her own fear -- the way that his face faded into disappointment. it was wrong of her to take a joke and not simply just laugh it off . . . but she couldn’t help but have her mind wander. “sorry.” she said, assuming that tooji knew just why she was apologizing for.
when the other reached out and touched her cheek, she was taken off guard. his touch was incredibly gentle -- so much so that she could hardly believe that it was the same man she’d heard was a kidnapper touching her as if she were as fragile as a child. bringing her hand up, she placed it atop of his own, ishigaki’s hand much smaller than the ex-hitman. “you’re very kind, tooji.” she said with a wide smile. there wasn’t very many people genuinely cared about her aside from ‘the boss’ daughter’. meanwhile -- the other simply cared about her for her. “i don’t understand, why are you so willing to step in the way of danger for me?” she wasn’t sure if she was stepping out of line by asking such a question, but he genuinely confused her with his caring nature. after all, she’d heard of what kind of man he was. why was he worried about her, but he wasn’t worried about the other women that he mercilessly turned over? what did she do to deserve his care that they didn’t? “i’m sorry, you’re right. i should probably get going.” grabbing her glass, she was ready to run off to her room. suddenly, she felt as if she had ruined the mood.
