[itsaroughlife]

On of my favorite skills of mine is I can make myself cry with just my own thoughts

[itsaroughlife]

I’m thinking about going back to school again. Is this crazy of me or do I actually think I can do this?

[proteinmom]

i love turning off lights. no need for all that

[top-cheese]

ok so its a pretty good story but you know what would make it better? a liar. a character who lies. maybe two.

[itsaroughlife]

Sometimes I get emails from my coworkers that make me want to throw things. Why can you not put a sentence together?

[a-book-of-creatures]

Book that was good: I liked it 👍

Book that was bad: this sucked 👎

Book that I wanted to like but which failed to live up to my hopes: I am going to write 10,000+ words explaining exactly why this book wronged me

[swarnpert]

wholesome laffy taffy jokes

[theearlofsandwich]

[what-even-is-thiss]

“Cats don’t actually love you”

A cat is a small creature in the middle of the food chain that is fully aware that you are a very large thing that could stomp its head in at any moment and yet it chooses to rest its tiny little head on your leg for a nap and spreads out on the floor near you exposing its belly and its most sensitive organs. It brings dead mice and bugs to you to share food.

Don’t you get it? This tiny thing trusts you. It wants to help you too. It licks your leg thinking that it’s helping. It kneads on you to find comfort. It shares its body warmth with you in the cold and gives you your space in the heat. It hisses at other mammals it sees outside including other cats in an effort to protect its family.

Cats love you so so much. But they will keep trying to eat plastic.

[loveridden1999]

[byjove]

I love how NYC has done everything under the sun to deal with the rat problem and now they’re circled back and are like “Ok. We’ll legalize bodega cats. We need cats manning the food stores.” ancient problems require ancient solutions.

[searching-for-utopia]

Best part about cats is how they can still serve their ancient purpose. So many dog breeds exist for reasons that no longer apply, but not cats. Assuming you have a good mouser that is.

[byjove]

Another problem with dogs is that a lot of them are not allowed to do what they were bred for and people get mad at them when they want to do it instead of being a well-behaved little sweetie. Jack Russell terriers and dachshund are both excellent hunting dogs and can make superb ratters but people buy them because they’re cute and then get angry when they’re feisty and bitey and bored without stimulation. Like, I’m sorry your terrier absolutely eviscerated a rat in your kitchen and got blood everywhere when you weren’t home but he isn’t a bad dog and that is quite literally the job he was made for.

[byjove]

They’re ubiquitous across the city but technically illegal though the law is not enforced, probably because there would be large scale rioting if these hardworking New York citizens were fired from their jobs. I think they were banned for health and safety purposes but the city has reluctantly admitted having cats in establishments that sell food is much less of a public health nightmare than having hordes of rats and mice in establishments that sell food. It looks like bodega cats are going to be officially legal now, not that that matters to the cats as cats love breaking laws.

[anxeious]

[kanjiklubb]

im a bit jealous of the social life the birds hanging out on the power lines seem to have.

[east-of-nowhere]

“Home is where the trees look normal” is the sweetest, saddest, most nostalgic truth I’ve ever heard.

[maswartz]

[unusual-suspects]

[midasgutz]

making heavy use of a technique i like to call "bothering my cat" which consists largely of bothering my cat

[normal-horoscopes]

[I WAKE BOLT UPRIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT DEFLECT A CURSE WITH A TENNIS RACKET AND IMMEDIATELY FALL BACK ASLEEP]