Things Will Be Better
So of course I didn't finish my first play through, got to Act 3 and decided instead I wanted to start all over again with a Durge run which of course is going about as well as you'd expect, I'm trying road to redemption and of course I had to resist Gales temptations when he reached out that portal but I'm actively romancing Astarion, so of course here is my Durge Sorcerer Wood Elf Astral romancing Gale <3
tw // childhood trauma
Finally a moment to rest at camp, Astral found herself slouched on one of the bedrolls close to the campfire in the centre of camp, absolutely exhausted with the day the party had faced, having assisted the grove in fighting back against the Shadow Druid’s trying to lock the grove away from the rest of Faerûn, after finding Kagha’s plans to assist them in their plans of course Astral couldn’t sit by idly and watch it all happen. After fighting a couple annoying Mephit’s and some beefy Woad’s the party of course had to confront the woman and help convince her that life in the shadows was not worth the hassle, and then of course fight off the shadow druid’s that had disguised themselves as rats. All in all, a pretty eventful and rather painful day and Astral was ready to kick her feet up, relax and finally get some well-earned sleep.
“Fancy helping me with cooking for this merry band of misfits?” Came the wizard’s smooth voice, disturbing Astral from her peaceful relaxation, opening her eyes to peer at the man towering over her she couldn’t help but smile at his eagerness to provide for their found group. Clutching a mismatching of ingredients, food that they had scavenged, stole and bartered for he wasn’t seeming to take no for an answer.
Standing up, dusting her clothes off she gave the wizard a nod allowing him to lead the way to the dented cooking pot he had been using to whip up the party’s meals, “If we were in my tower back in Waterdeep, my we would have an impressive larder and many spices to make a grand meal, but I suppose a charming cooking pot in a camp in the middle of the wilderness shall have to do.” Reminising of his homeland of Waterdeep, he seemed almost defeated that he couldn’t prepare a proper meal for the people he had come to know and care for, it was sweet.
“What’s on the menu tonight then Gale?” Peering into the pot at the boiling water Astral quipped, “If we’ve ran out of supplies and are having a bowl of warm water each, you can tell everyone because I’m not sure their bellies would be too happy.” Earning a chuckle from the wizard at her silliness she watched as he sat himself down, a makeshift chopping board and a dagger being used to cut up some spring onions they had managed to grab on their roaming’s of the local woods, “Well I was hoping to make a nice stew but I suppose a bowl of warm seasoned water will have to do.” He smiled up at her, enjoying this banter with her.
As she sat down nearby, ready to assist him in his cooking she looked over the ingredients, sea salt of course to give the food a little bit of seasoning at least, a large slab of venison she had cut from a dead sheep herself, some fresh vegetables and of course, his spring onions.
“Where do you need me then?” Rubbing her hands together she was ready to make this cooking go by as quickly as possible as her stomach finally realised she was in the general vicinity of food it growled out in protest at its emptiness, Astral glared down at the interruption as if her stomach could feel the heated stare, “Well, seems your belly is ready to get stuck into some cooking, you could debone that venison and get it cut up as finely as you can, we don’t want anyone having to chew through the fat or picking a couple bones out of their dinner now do we?” Astral couldn’t help but blush at his recognition of her hunger, but she could hardly blame herself she had had a rather draining day, and one needs sustenance to keep fighting.
Dragging herself away to begin helping she set herself up with a slab of stone and slightly smaller slab of venison, cleaver in hand she stared down at the remainer of the sheep in-front of her, swinging down at the meat she of course had never actually cooked for herself like this before living her life on scraps and the rare hot meals she could get in taverns or any safe haven that would provide one, gods she could only remember the last time she had cooked a proper meal was with her mother as a child. So long ago now she wonders as she butchers this meat in-front of her, where if still alive her mother is it had been so very long she wonders if her mother would remember her now if she were to find her wherever her location may be, maybe she still lived in their small cottage just on the outskirts of Baldur’s Gate, maybe she had moved on to somewhere else, somewhere bigger… better. She didn’t realise the mess she had made in-front of her until a gentle hand laid itself on her arm, willing her to stop driving the cleaver she held into the meat over and over and over and over and….
“Astral? Are you quite alright? You were a thousand miles away…” Gale soothed as he shifted to removed the new weapon from Astral’s hand, she clutched it with force but his hand brushing over her clenched fist willed her to release the item from her grasp and in that moment all she wanted to do was curl into a ball and cry out for her mother… her mother, where? Where is she, why isn’t she here? Surely, she wasn’t dead? She had be alive, it was her mother…
“Sorry I seemed to lose myself a bit there, I don’t mean to worry you, Gale.” She couldn’t bring herself to look at the man, she could feel the tears welling in her eyes as she recalled so many memories of times long passed, her childhood it all came flooding back to her so fast, like running into a brick wall at full speed. She could do nothing but stare down at her hands as she fiddled with her fingers, maybe she should just retreat to her tent and pretend that she was fine, pretend that nothing had happened. Yes, that’s what she would do. So, she stood, giving Gale a curt nod and shambling her way over to her tent like a hurt puppy, forcing herself to put one leg in-front of the other.
She wasn’t sure how much time had passed as she sat in her tent, curled into her own body nothing could hurt her like this, no one could bring any harm to her as long as she wrapped her arms tightly around herself, she wasn’t here in her tent, no she was home in the cottage waiting for mother to come up to lull her to sleep with fairytales and kiss her goodnight as she danced the precipice of sleep and wake. She didn’t notice the flap to her tent gently parting, the wizard slowly lowering himself down to crouch in-front of her, warm bowl of stew in hand and a gentle smile on his face as he took in the situation, she found herself in.
“I thought you might like to try your handiwork, I must say your venison helped make this stew possibly one of the best I have made with the given circumstances, many compliments all round camp of course I had to tell everyone you gave a helping hand, my little helper.” His compliments of the food brought her back to the reality she was in, sitting in her tent a broken mess crying over her long gone childhood that she was so easily transported back to with the simple task of cooking. She gently reached out for the bowl, almost as if it would burn her if she dared to touch it but her belly rumbling in agreement to accepting the bowl had her quickly reaching for the spoon and beginning her devouring of the meal.
Gale sat with her as she ate, she couldn’t bring herself to care of how sloppily she ate her meal, she was famished and would actually fight a man if they dared to remove the bowl from her grasp, she couldn’t help but agree with her campmates as she ate… it really was a delicious meal, definitely one of Gale’s best. As she finished, she laid the bowl down beside her, stretching herself out of the curled up state she had resigned herself to for however many minutes, hours had passed as she had sat disassociated from the world around her. Gazing up at Gale she knew she had to give the man an explanation for her earlier outburst, she had walked off with nothing but a nod after viciously brutalising part of their dinner.
“I can only apologise for earlier, I’m not sure what came over me, but it was no way to act and to simply walk away without any explanation wasn’t right, I’m so sorry Gale you must have thought you were next for the chopping block.” She tried to make light of the situation but looking at Gale’s stern expression she realised, comedy wasn’t going to get her very far in this conversation, “You don’t need to apologise, you were very clearly having a moment, I could see it in your eyes that you were a thousand miles away, of course I removed the weapon not for my own safety, but for yours.” He thought she was going to harm herself, if she was going to do that she would have done in it private, she wouldn’t have made him privy to a show like that, he was too pure for that, he didn’t deserve to see something as horrible as that.
“I appreciate your concern Gale but of course I wouldn’t have done anything like that to myself, especially not in-front of someone, that would just be evil.” She tried to convince herself more than convince him, she almost didn’t believe the words coming out her own mouth, her brain and the words she was saying were warring with each other and the look on her face must have let on, as the wizard reached out to grasp at one of her hands, just like he had earlier.
“I don’t expect you to tell me everything that is swirling around in that head of yours, I understand that whatever is going on up there is most likely private and something that you’re not willing to share with a man you met not even a week ago, but when I say that you can trust me, I mean it Astral, I will not pry into your private matters if you do not wish to share them but whatever is going on please know that if you feel comfortable to share, I am here to provide and comfort you may need.” There were very few people in her life that Astral had trusted with the details of her life, many of whom were now dead having taken secrets of her to their graves, she almost didn’t want to burden him with her thoughts and history, but there was something about him, something that made her want to tell him everything as she crawled into his arms and cried into them over all the broken parts of her.
“Thank you.” Came her simple response, and for the first time in her life, rather than shutting herself off from her emotions and building her walls back up, she let herself move to him, into his arms and cry. Allowing him to wrap his arms around her as she let herself cry, let herself feel her emotions, and as his hand soothed along her back she actually believed that everything might actually be alright. Maybe this time things would different, this time they would be different.
Cross Posted on Ao3 - jacethed00d










