JAZZMAN

29  she/they ///casual blog/// Artist, crafter, gamer and a growing obsession with public transport

[lleyksie]

more ancient horse mamaposting

[asterkid-deactivated20150106]

tomorrow……… is august„„„„,?????

its augu…….st?? tomorrW???????????

8th monTH???????? 4 ,more mont hs of 2013?????????????

what??????????????????????????????………………………..

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

so strange when people assume 'waking up early' means increased productivity bc no??? im awake so i can read fanfic in bed before breakdown

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

BREAKFAST

[grifalinas]

My favorite form of redemption arc is “I hate that I have morals now”

[grifalinas]

Like “I realized that I was in the wrong and now I will work hard to atone” is good and all, but “how dare you infect me with morals” will always be so much more entertaining

[gh0sthoodie]

That moment the former baddie starts to walk away from some bad situation, almost gets out, and then just stops, curses, and turns around to go help?

*chef’s kiss* delicious

[grifalinas]

This one gets it

[villainessbian]

GLaDOS finding her conscience terrifying is peak villainous arc IMO

“I’ve heard voices all my life. But now I hear the voice of a conscience, and it’s terrifying. Because for the first time, it’s MY VOICE!” (scandalised) “I’m being serious- I think there’s something really wrong with me”

Your journey made me discover things about me that I’m haunted by

[the-haiku-bot]

Your journey made me

discover things about me

that I’m haunted by

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[louisegluckpdf]

hey are y’all just straight lying about taz becoming heart-breakingly emotional? cause i’m like 20 episodes in and merle just dirty talked a plant

[louisegluckpdf]

nevermind i don’t remember what happiness is

[jalzir]

so bored yet stressed, I just wanna eat

[adz]

sipping on this pretending im a carp in a murky river swimming around sucking up clutches of gelatinous frog eggs

[sproutinglupine]

My biggest pattern to date, Nature's Journey! It was so fun to do all of these little motifs for this pattern 🌿

Nature's Journey Cross Stitch Pattern | Sprouting Lupine Shop

[pangur-and-grim]

all books should be written by deeply damaged autistic perverts

[ssajin]

@pangur-and-grim ?

[pangur-and-grim]

YOU DON'T NEED TO TAG ME ON THIS, I WROTE THE POST

[hppjmxrgosg]

"going out to get milk" is a common turn of phrase used to describe a man abandoning his family.

the "milkman" is a common figure in stories depicting a woman's infidelity and adulterous affair.

this implies that the ability to provide milk would both decrease the likelihood of a man abandoning his wife and children, as it would eliminate the need for leaving to get milk AND would secure that man's marriage, as his wife would have no need to seek milk from an extraneous source.

therefore, all men should produce milk, through various means such as:

- being a cow

- being an almond

- being a woman

- being a coconut

- being in the omegaverse

- being an oat

(list is exemplary and not finite)

in this essay, i will redefine the nuclear family and explain the seductive and inflammatory nature of the 1993 "Got Milk?" commercials.

[hppjmxrgosg]

you shut your mouth.

[teaboot]

I think that if you had enough daughters AND played your cards right you could spring Mambo Number Five out at the EXACT right gathering and shatter your entire family's trust forever

[teaboot]

The secret is to name them out of order with the lyrics so by the time anyone catches on it's too late

[teaboot]

For me personally the ideal gathering would be my funeral

[teaboot]

A little bit for Monica, she's my wife

A little bit for Erica, for her strife

My books all go to Rita, cause she reads

My greenhouse goes to Tina, she plants trees

The furniture is Sandra's, on my lawn

Jewelry for Mary, she can pawn

Ashes go to Jessica, that's my plan

A little bit of me inside a can (ah!)

[molabuddy]

3 hours of sleep = i hate people who laugh

0 ours of sleep = waouw 🌼🌼🌼🌼🐎

[molabuddy]

we all need to take better care of our selfs or we might Pass away

[pollen]

happy Barely Keeping It Together Wednesday to all who celebrate

[fairycosmos]

the issue with growing up in the 2000s and 2010s was like there was this really big push toward "accepting your weirdness" overall but they meant like idk wearing mismatched socks or something not being tangibly beyond the norm in any way shape or form

[justsomeguycore]

lesbian scifi is so easy. here’s a woman in cargo pants and a tank top on a spaceship. are you with me

[justsomeguycore]

maybe it’s not even cargo pants. maybe it’s coveralls rolled to + tied around the waist. maybe she even has fuckoff boots

[justsomeguycore]

lesbian scifi is so easy. here’s a woman in cargo pants and a tank top on a spaceship. are you with me

[justsomeguycore]

maybe it’s not even cargo pants. maybe it’s coveralls rolled to + tied around the waist. maybe she even has fuckoff boots

[motherfucker-somewhat-limited]

did laundry and showered today you knowwwww i'm hitting that clean sheets clean jammies clean me trifecta tonight

[motherfucker-somewhat-limited]

bro im bedcelled. im comfypilled. im literally cozymaxxing.

[probablysomethingtm]

​honkpilled shoomaxxer

[motherfucker-somewhat-limited]

straight up "snorkin' it". and by "it" haha, well. let's just say. mimimi

[the-haiku-bot]

straight up “snorkin’ it”.

and by “it” haha, well. let’s

just say. mimimi

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.