James Reborn

This has been a log of my gender transition and mental health recovery since 2013. Thank you all for the support shown to me in that time! 🖤 IG: @spacetimeloaf

[jamesreborn]

How did you get your scar so light and small? I had top surgery 3 years ago and mine is still bright pink and raised to hell- and at least an inch wide. Any advice? :(

I used scar strips after surgery, massaged the scars, and had no sun exposure on them for a year. There are scar gels you could try too. If your scars are irritated as well as raised/pink I'd recommend checking in with your doctor. I know someone who had a revision for his painful scars and he says they look and feel much better now.

[jamesreborn]

It's really good to see transmasc representation in Seattle. I'm not from here and not staying here but been here a long time and I just feel like the representation is..dubious at times. Your pics are inspiring. ty

I FEEL SIMILAR

Thank you & blessings 🙏🏼

[jamesreborn]

Hey there! I'm non-binary and I recently came out to my parents,they're letting me buy a binder but I don't know where to get a good one. I was wondering if you had any suggestions? Thanks :)

I used Underworks Tri-top and highly recommend!

[jamesreborn]

Hey! I’m in the process of trying to get a hysto with Dr Mihalov. I was wondering if you remember about how long it took to get scheduled for surgery with her after your consultation? I’m on a bit of a time crunch with insurance 😵‍💫 thanks!

Hey there! My surgery was 3 months after the initial consultation. It could have been sooner but there was a hold up with letters and insurance. Hopefully yours can be scheduled soon! She and her team were great so I wish you the best of luck.

[jamesreborn]

8 years on T documented for science 👨🏻‍🔬

Some notes and answers to FAQs:

❇️ Hormones are simply a tool some people use to alleviate dysphoria. Not everyone wants them, and many who do don’t have access. That doesn’t make them any less trans.

❇️ I came out, started my social transition, and began working out a few months prior to starting T. I couldn’t get a gym membership so I jogged and did home workouts.

❇️ My hormones are within standard male range. Dedication and hard work builds muscle, not T.

❇️ Therapy and mental healthcare have been crucial. My body and mind have gone through a lot and it’s important to care for both. It can be difficult but I’ve never doubted my choice or taken this life for granted.

Thank you all for the support and love along the way, and Happy New Year!

[jamesreborn]

8 years on T has been a hoot and a holler, but worth it.

[jamesreborn]

🧱 Brick by brick by brick 🧱

[jamesreborn]

Mentally and physically, you’ve got to keep going to keep growing. 🌲🌘

4 years apart • Up 25 pounds • Down a couple organs

[jamesreborn]

3 weeks post-op hysto ▶️ 1 year post-op

Shoutout to my chest and belly hair for camouflaging a total of 7 surgical scars on my torso now 🤠

[jamesreborn]

My incisions from hysto healed pretty quick thankfully. The full recovery took a few months after that as my body went through hormone changes post-op. I tried gel again for a year after hysto but went back on injections a couple months ago. Both gel and injections have side effects but I look and feel more like myself on injections. Back on that juice.

Full 🎥: Hysto & TMS Timeline

[jamesreborn]

It’s been over a year since being set free from my ovarian shackles! My surgeon was Dr. Lynda Mihalov in Seattle and she and her whole team were trans competent. The hospital had a financial aid program for low income patients which is how I was able to get this long needed surgery. 

Full 🎥: Hysto & TMS Timeline 

[jamesreborn]

Robotic Arms, Magnetic Fields, and More

I wanted to share my hysterectomy experience so I put together this timeline video. I hope it can help anyone thinking about hysto or just learning what it’s like for trans people to get gender affirming care. 

I also talk about mental health and a newer treatment option called Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation used to treat depression. It was effective for me and I want others to know about it too. 

Thank you all for the support along the way! And big thanks to Maddie for your help recording this video!

Much love 🖤

[nawhun]

An interview with a trans man named Peter Alexander, taken from the British Pathé archives. The interview was filmed in 1937.

[Transcript:] As the years passed on, it became very evident that the male side, and the male personality, was becoming dominant. So, after seeking medical advice, I decided to cast aside women’s clothing for those of a male. Although I no longer use lipstick and powder, which would be rather ridiculous when one has to shave every day, I don’t blame the modern girl for using it. But seriously, I do not consider that woman is inferior to man, as she has huge responsibilities, and a definite purpose in life. I left New Zealand because of the publicity which followed me wherever I went. And I hope to go to London at a later date. And when I return to settle down and marry here, and continue with my musical career. And finally, I have one advantage over you other chappies, and that is, I know both sides to every little ordinary story. [End transcript.]

I love his interview because he takes the time to defend the inherent worth of women, and separates his gender identity from his feminist perspective.

I feel the same way as Mr Alexander did. My transition has nothing to do with politics, or my view of womanhood. I think womanhood is beautiful, nuanced, and precious. I did not choose to be transgender, or to be a man. I did not choose my gender dysphoria. I also won't apologise for being a trans man!

I tried, for a very long time, to be my assigned gender. I wasn't capable of it. It was destroying my mental health. But that doesn't mean I have a low opinion of womanhood, or women, or girls.

I think being a woman is wonderful. If you are a woman. I was not. So it nearly killed me. But! I recognise that I am a statistical exception. I recognise that many women have layered, complex, and unique experiences of their femaleness, and they will never arrive at the same conclusion I did (that I am a man). And I think valuing gender non-conforming women, and butches, is essential in promoting LGBT+ equality.

I am proud to be a trans man, and I am also proud to have been assigned female at birth.

[shakespeare-kinnie-deactivated2]

You’re straight? During pride month?

[jamesreborn]

Okey dokey, it’s been said before by others but I feel the need to express it as well. Comments like this affect me on a fairly deep and painful level. On the way to realizing myself as a transman, I first existed as a gay woman in the world. In the queer community I felt seen, celebrated, and easily readable as lgbt. Now I’m typically read as a cis man and that has changed my social experience in and out of the queer community. I transitioned so I could be seen as the man I am but it came at a high cost. One of those costs was a certain loss of queer visibility. Taking shots at straight people is common in the community and I did it myself in the past. I didn’t realize at the time how it unintentionally excluded straight trans people from the queer fold. 

It took me years to accept the label of gay, and I was so proud of reaching that point after a lifetime of internalized homophobia. So when I considered transitioning and knew that would make me technically straight, I was heartbroken. It felt like a betrayal to myself and others. It was an even more common view at the time- think of the treatment of Max from The L Word as just one example. Could I no longer claim the pride of what I’d been through to become myself? Did I go from being the straight enemy, to the gay champion, to the straight enemy again? It depends on who’s looking and what they’re assuming about me. It’s been 8 years since starting my transition and I still don’t know what to call my sexuality. Calling myself queer leads many to think I date men, which I don’t. Calling myself straight leads many to think I’m cis, which I’m not. Is wearing my trans flag the only way to feel valid at pride?

[jamesreborn]

Why is it so fucking hard to talk about trans/life updates anymore?

[jamesreborn]

Visible for my trans siblings both in and out of the closet • Visible for the kids being denied healthcare, sports, and housing • Visible for families and allies to see our humanity • Visible in honor of those who came before us • Visible in honor of those we’ve lost

[jamesreborn]

It is what it is! Post-op struggles and lack of gym access has made it tough to be as active as I’d like. I’ll be fully vaccinated in a few weeks and plan to go back to the gym and lift with a vengeance.