jamesspidercat @jamesspidercat - Tumblr Blog

yknow in spite of the fact that the entire world is currently turning itself upside down to prevent me and my friends from having a good day, i really can't imagine being anything other than a trans woman. this shit kicks ass. we are so cool

assignedfaggyatbirth

Posting this because I was reminded of it recently but if you're the type of person who is physically affectionate with everyone in your friend group except the transfem I wish harm upon you

assignedfaggyatbirth

Go sit next to your transfem friend on the couch and lean against her. Go hold her hand when you go out together. Give her a kiss on the cheek when you say goodbye. Give her a hug when she's sad. Do anything to show her that she's loved the same as everyone else. Please

terraswallows

Oh no… it’s happening again.

The hormones have hit, and I’m transforming once more into a touch-starved little monster I swore I had under control. You know the one—overly affectionate, soft beyond reason, and so tragically, embarrassingly touch-starved.

Like clockwork, every month, this version of me wakes up: body is heating up, mind is getting cloudy, and so hopelessly desperate to feel arms around her. I want to curl up against one of my pretty friends, bury my face in her neck, and whisper about how soft she smells and how safe I feel right there. I want to cling, hold hands until our fingers forget how to let go, and lazily tangle our legs on the couch like we're meant to be draped over each other.

But instead… I resist. Because I’m scared—scared of being seen as weird, clingy, the “too much” girl. The one who can’t just chill with her desire for affection. And it sucks, honestly. Because being a transfem with this weird cocktail of hormones, estrogen and yearning is already enough of a trip without throwing in “monster who craves soft snuggles.” into the mix.

Maybe one day I won’t feel like a freak for wanting so badly to be held. Maybe one day I’ll have a girl who sees the needy look in my eyes and just opens her arms with a little smile and a quiet, “Come here, babe.”

Until then, I’ll just clutch a pillow, bite my lip, and try not to think about how good it would feel to be someone's cuddlebug disaster.