a little bitch

the reviews are in. jasper st. james of the windsor court st. jameses. 22. full-time banshee journalist.

[jasperstjames]

meet jasper !!

not here (gravewood) for a long time, here for a good time

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Name: Jasper Jesse St. James

Nickname: ...JJ (used by few, I promise I’ve never actually seen that show - I swear it)

Age: 22 years old

Birthday: October 30 (Scorpio)

Pronouns: He/Him

Sexuality: Heterosexual

Occupation: Journalist (questionable), Youtuber

FULL BIO

Once upon a time, Jasper was a shy, quiet kid with scary high intelligence and (1) best friend (his mom). He had zero extracurriculars, zero interest in making friends in the cafeteria, and zero interest in the rumor mill.

But then he discovered the power of YouTube. And it was all downhill from there.

One would not expect a kid from Gravewood, West Virginia to be an influencer. But what started as a stupid movie review account (do you really want to hear what a 12-year-old thinks of The Dark Knight or Inception?) spiraled into something much, much worse. He went from YouTube to Vine back to YouTube and then to TikTok, amassing followers for pranks, daily vlogging, comedy (questionable), tea reports, ranking content, and light gaming.

Even though his family had enough money for him to have plenty of options, Jasper was so sure that it was his ticket out of town that he put all of his eggs into the one basket. By the time he graduated from high school, he had millions of followers, a squad of friends that may or may not have mostly tolerated him for the clout, and only one college acceptance. He hadn’t even bothered to apply - his mom had done it for him.

Luckily it was to a school he had an interest in, and for Journalism to boot. He didn’t know how much money his parents paid to UCLA to get him in, but he was sure it was a pretty penny. Either that or they pretended he was on the rowing team...

Anyway. He lasted one semester before he found his classes to not be worth his time.

Immediately upon his withdrawal, he decided to stick around in LA to pursue... something. A spur of the moment and regrettable decision. His choice to move into a content creator house was potentially the worst judgment call he had ever made.

Some situations (ex: frat houses) lend themselves to a pack mentality, encouraging actions that one would normally never take via peer pressure. If everyone’s doing it, why should you not?

If everyone’s pranks are becoming increasingly more daring, how do you stay on top? How far are you willing to go to keep your status? Is it worth it?

Reader, it was not worth it.

He didn’t know whose idea it had been to break into Taylor Swift’s place in Beverly Hills, but when the police arrived, he was standing outside with a camera and a whole lot of fear. He sold out his friends in seconds and got off easy because he hadn’t actually entered the house (the security cameras, his super expensive lawyer argued, made that clear). But it was too late. The damage was done.

Audible and HelloFresh pulled their sponsorships immediately.

And he officially began his cancelled era.

He’s been back in Gravewood for about a year, hiding out on his hiatus. In that time, he’s become the most annoying person in town. The Jacob Ben Israel of Gravewood, he’s the star reporter for The Banshee. It’s a position acquired for him by his wealthy parents, who... own The Banshee.

Jasper is one of two full-time staff members and his sensationalist headlines and blind items sections have been key drivers in getting readership up. He never lets anyone forget it.

A degree in journalism? Journalistic integrity? Who needs either of those when you can publish statements you’ve heard through an extended game of telephone?

An eternal child who has never had to face the consequences of his actions before, Jasper is just biding his time until he can stage his comeback. Until then, he’s trying to make things more interesting in Small Town, USA.

[jasperstjames]

hopekang​:

~

In all her years of knowing of Jasper, and his somewhat wild persona, she had never pegged him as someone who could come across so… awkward. Maybe it was the fact that this was the first time they had interacted in years. Maybe it was because he didn’t want to be interacting with her at all. Hope could have accepted either as fact. 

Still, she could participate in friendly conversation. Years of being taught the importance of polite small talk had prepared her to maintain a conversation with almost anyone. Even someone like Jasper who she certainly had nothing in common with. 

Hope laughed a little, the concept of an overbearing mother nothing she was a stranger to. Though, he had just come back from living across the country, she figured that she was just excited to her son again for the first time in years. “Well, hey, I know it’s not California, but there’s nothing quite like Gravewood, right?” Like he planned on staying around for long, anyway. He’d be on the next plane back the second another celebrity got put in the hot seat.

She wasn’t sure if it was already time to look for an exit strategy out of this conversation with the way Jasper was acting, but she’d tough it out for a bit longer if only to be polite. It wasn’t going poorly by any means, she just didn’t want to trap him into a conversation he didn’t want to be a part of. 

“Don’t worry about it,” She waved it off, completely aware of how awkward the encounter was, but she wasn’t going to dwell on it, either. 

“Oh, yeah,” She said with a laugh, fluffing the ends of her hair. It had grown a bit since the big chop at the lodge, her hair just starting to reach her shoulders again. That, paired with the lack of glasses, and the slow change in attire she had been sporting would be enough to throw anyone who knew her before through a loop. “I’m trying out something different, I guess. You like it?”

Not that his opinion would make her break her, but there was something about years of seeking approval that was hard to shake. “I’ve been good. I have my own place now, so I’ve just been trying to make ends meet as best as I can. So I’ve just been… here, really.” A depressing thought, though she would let it roll like water off a Duck’s back if only so it didn’t follow her around the rest of the day.  “How about you? How’s being back in town going?”

━━▲━━

Jasper couldn't help the relief that flooded his system at Hope's little laugh, the sound the clearest indicator he had that he wasn't doing that bad in their conversation. The mom thing could have wrecked it all, but Hope was humoring him.

Whether that was because it was just what she did or because it was him, he didn’t know. But he was seriously wishing it was the latter.

“There are some good things about Gravewood, yeah,” he acknowledged, knowing that doing so without a hint of sarcasm in his tone was a little out of character for him. He was a Gravewood anti, and he had made that clear in all of his Q&A’s on both his YouTube channel and the little text-box-pop-up-pointing videos set to a beat on TikTok. If he looked at Hope for a beat too long as he let his words settle into the air between them, he hoped she didn’t notice.

He could try and chalk it up to the whole makeover thing, still taking in her new appearance instead of taking in her actual physical presence in his life (technically).

But then Hope was reaching out to her hair, adjusting her appearance before him, and his eyes were narrowing, confusion settling across his features by the time she’d asked her question. For all intents and purposes he was still more or less a stranger to Hope. Why would his opinion on her change matter?

“Yeah! I mean, the old Hope was good too, but this is nice too. If you like it, that’s what matters, right?” he answered carefully, observing her response to his words maybe a little too closely before casually shrugging off the whole conversation.

He was finding it increasingly difficult, however, to remain casual when new bits of information were being tossed his way. Things that he truly hadn’t known, since he’d gone almost radio silent after the universe (and his nerves) had decided to keep them apart at the Ski Lodge in December.

“Oh, sweet.” He was nodding along as she spoke. “When did you get your own place? I ask because I’m curious about the rental market. I’m still living with my parents so I’m just... thinking of exploring some options. I’m, y’know, good. Being back in town is fine. Busy, actually. So much news to write about. So many friends to catch up with. Never a dull day.”

He couldn’t even make the last lie a little bit convincing, but he was going to leave it up to Hope to call him out on it. 

[jasperstjames]

indyerstraits​:

–

“Indeed,” Jamie confirmed, drawing out his vowels as if he were speaking to a small child. “I have had a most rare vision. I had a dream, past the wit of man to say what dream it was… The eye of man hath not heard, the ear of man hath not seen, man’s hand is not able to taste, his tongue to conceive, nor his heart to report, what my dream was… Nick Bottom, act four, scene one.”

Jamie settled snugly in his seat as he took out another bottle out of spite for being called out for littering. He flicked the cap off, sending it flying into the back of the seat in front of him to the annoyance of the woman sitting there. “The liquor is for the trauma,” he said matter-of-factly. “I’ve yet to scrub Carson Mclaren’s interpretation of the Puck dance in 10th grade. Leotards on minors should be illegal.” 

He stuck up his pinky finger and tipped the contents back into his mouth, swallowing the mouthful with a hiss and a grimace as he burned going down. Patting his chest before discarding the bottle under the chairs, Jamie turned to Jasper, swaying off-center before he steadied himself on the back of his chair.

“You know, I could say the same about you,” he said, putting up a finger. His eyes were glassy and unfocused, brows knitted low as if he were particularly sensitive to the light. ”I thought you went to college. This is not Cambridge, in case you were confused by the presence of my overwhelming genius.”

━━▲━━

Jasper did not appreciate the way that Jamie was breaking things down for him, the clear meaning of the act being to call him stupid. It wasn’t like Jamie was helping much either. He had just as strong of an accent as anyone on the stage, he was just speaking slower.

So best to ignore him, really.

But... how could he ignore the fact that the little drunken weirdo had just quoted an entire Shakespeare monologue at him from memory? Act and scene number and all? What kind of normal person did that?

"Is that your go-to drunk trick? Because most people insist they can juggle or do a handstand or something. Do you just keep all that on lock in your brain in case you need it someday?”

‘The liquor is for the trauma’ might just’ve been the truest thing Jamie Dyer had ever said to him, but Jasper would be lying if he said it didn’t set off some warning bells. It was far more entertaining to watch Jamie down a nip of alcohol, taking the whole thing like a shot, over whatever was going on on stage, but it was like a train wreck waiting to happen. And Jasper had a front row seat.

“Kinda dumb to retraumatize yourself for kicks, don’t you think? Maybe you oughta go home, Dyer, becau-” he was just about to say, feeling straight up benevolent when yet another ‘you’re kinda stupid’ type insult came his way.

Maybe Jamie needed to stick around, actually. Watch ten more Shakespeares and see what happened.

“Yeah, for a semester. At UCLA. How far do you think nepotism was supposed to have gotten me, bro? Harvard would have been a stretch. But I’m sure your genius coulda managed it. Hey, how much Shakespeare do you have memorized? Could you do this whole play by yourself?”

[jasperstjames]

teddyxmiller​:

It was clear that Teddy was being careful, guarding himself, as he stood there. One hand reaching up to tightly grasp the strap of his backpack that hung off of his shoulder. The last thing he needed was to become another headline, “Son of local serial killer gets wasted on Moonshine”. Tabloids were one of his least favourite things in the world, and when he’d moved back to town, he’d made a point of looking into the staff currently working at The Banshee so that he could avoid them as best he could.

“I remember you, yeah. Jasper St. James. You’re kind of a big deal, right?” He nodded, doing his best to present a calm and collected front despite the way his heart was racing. It wasn’t Jasper’s fault, it was just his natural reaction. “I’m Teddy.” It only felt right to formally introduce himself.

“Yeah, about a month ago.” His memory of Jasper from his childhood wasn’t much, but he did know of him at least. But, he didn’t live under a rock, and he’d heard of Gravewood’s very own ‘influencer’ and some of things he’d been up to with his internet fame. It was the kind of publicity Teddy had spent his life trying to stay away from (he’d only started an instagram account in the past month, and his Facebook profile sat basically dormant).

Granted, every time Teddy’s name had appeared anywhere, it wasn’t because of something he’d done.

“I wouldn’t think a town like Gravewood would be exciting enough for you anymore.”

━━▲━━

Jasper didn’t know what he was expecting Teddy’s response to be, but without a doubt he had not been expecting ‘you’re kind of a big deal’.

It was refreshing, actually, to finally have someone else acknowledge it. And seemingly without judgment too. But judging by the dude’s stance alone, Jasper knew he couldn’t go his usual route of annoying someone into talking. A quick ‘you’re kind of a big deal too, from what I’ve heard’ would only make his just-formed longer term goal of an exclusive with the son of a serial killer much more difficult to achieve.

And Jasper had always been a fan of getting from Point A to Point B in the easiest way possible.

“Cool to re-meet you, bro,” he said instead. “A month is a long time in Gravewood. Surprised we haven’t run into each other already. Are you back for good or just for now?”

It had only been about a minute, but Jasper was already finding it increasingly difficult to make normal conversation. He was having to resist every impulse he had to stay on track, and even then he was pretty sure that a skittish personality might back away after his softball questions alone. How did people survive that way? Playing the long game, going on without their curiosity satisfied. Was he just built different by not having the patience for it?

At least there was a safe-ish topic on hand in the absolutely not exciting recent events in town.

“Excitement is relative, I think. It has its moments. Like that Renaissance Festival. Who doesn’t want to hear Billy Shakes recited at them in a strong West Virginia drawl? In the winter? For some people, Gravewood, West Virginia is where dreams come true, man.”

[jasperstjames]

mackenziegthomas​:

- - -

It was the kind of statement she might agree with if anyone else was saying it. Being normal had never particularly been her thing– she preferred the fringes of life. There was a lot to be seen or observed with the vantage it offered. Jasper was the kind of person she’d disagree with about anything just on principle. Regardless of what the topic was, or whether he made a good point, he was automatically wrong. Especially on days like today, where he was additionally being annoying.

“People say it a lot.” She shrugged off, in lieu of a real answer, and not feeling particularly inclined to talk after his further comments, “Are you implying that all my parents can afford is basic cable?”

That was her innate problem with the rich of Gravewood. Her family was middle class- enough so, her mother had never needed to work, but it wasn’t enough to get her a Range Rover for her sweet 16th. This automatically put her in whatever concept of poor Jasper had.

Did he think she worked as a waitress to pay her parents bills? Because this was a lifestyle choice, not a necessity.

“I don’t think being disillusioned with real life is why people don’t want to share things with you.” If it was anything, it was his approach to people, “They probably just don’t like you. Or– have you considered, this town has no actual news to report on?”

She surveyed him for a long moment, weighing up if trying to chat up the only other customer she had– a drunkard, reeking of cheap whiskey, was worth more than this. “Buy me a milkshake, and tip more than 50 percent– and I’ll think about talking to you.”

━━▲━━

“Are you implying that I would imply it?” Jasper countered, avoiding her question by answering with a question. Really, he had kinda been implying it, but he didn’t know how much basic cable cost. And he definitely didn’t know the socioeconomic status of every family in town. It was like... 200 channels to be basic, right? A dollar per channel? Was that expensive?

Shaking his head to refocus himself, Jasper didn’t allow himself to seriously entertain either option that Mack had presented him with. He gave them each a 5-second pretend moment of reflection, Thinker pose and all, before speaking up once more.

“I know they don’t like me. Why do you think I left the town in the first place?” he pointed in Mack’s direction, the question legitimate. He was what the kids called a Self-Aware King. Yeah, his mom technically made him leave for college, but why would he have stuck around when the only locals that seemed to give a shit (besides his mom) were clout chasers? He didn’t let Mack think about an answer for too long, however, before he was moving on to her proposed option number two.

“C’mon. You’re not delusional. You and me both know that there’s sketchy shit going down all the time in Gravewood. I get that people don’t want to snitch, but this is like Crimetown, USA right down to the serial killer from our childhoods. Whoever thinks there isn’t actually news here is lying to themself.”

While Jasper was pretty sure he was serving up one hell of a conversation - by far the tastiest thing offered that day in Marie’s - he could tell from Mack’s glance around the restaurant that he was losing her.

Annoying. But luckily he was even more annoying.

“I’ll send you a hundred bucks on Cash App or Venmo right now for a guaranteed back and forth conversation that lasts at least 5 minutes. No loopholes of silence, the conversation has to be with you, and it has to be here. Now. You can even get your own milkshake so you don’t have to rely on a man for anything. What’s your username?”

[jasperstjames]

ellexreynolds​:

“Wow.” Elle’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “I always knew this town was a high level of crazy, but that’s really something else.” She really shouldn’t have been surprised considering the number of people who had tried to speak to her in what felt like riddles since she’d arrived at the festival, but apparently Gravewood did still have a few surprises up its sleeve.

She hadn’t seen anyone around that she knew, so she’d failed to find an excuse to get out of being there. But, with the newly struck up conversation, Elle wondered if it could be her escape.

“Honestly, at this point I wouldn’t be shocked if the whole town turned out to be some twisted cult. It’s had just about everything else right?” From a dirty mayor, a serial killer, and God knows what else, a cult felt like it would be the next thing on the list. “What I want to know is how you plan on seriously reviewing this.”

Elle’s eyes drifted back towards the stage, watching the scene as if it was taking place on a screen in front of her, straight out of a movie. But not in a cool way. The whole thing was so incredibly lame.

At the mention of escaping, Elle didn’t even hesitate. “Definitely not vibing the poem, let’s get out of here.”

━━▲━━

The spark of joy that lit in Jasper’s eyes the second that Elle agreed to abscond from the dismal scene before them refused to be extinguished by talk of work. He was counting on it sticking around, actually, to keep his cold little heart warm through the rest of the festivities.

It was like convincing the most popular girl in school to skip - a new experience for him, since they’d had zero reason to interact before, but one that was pretty damn exciting all the same.

“I will explain it to you as we make our escape,” he nodded, gesturing towards the exit (marked as such with some streamers tied around trees) and beginning his hushed monologue in order to appear busy with something important to anyone who might clock that the reviewer was leaving.

Would anyone truly care? Probably not. But appearances were everything.

“Really, it’s not hard. No one reads it, so I can just write a couple of lines about people really getting into the spirit and the poetry event feeling like it transported me back in time. The people who’re out there participating may cut it out to save because it’s a compliment, but it’s not too detailed. If you go too detailed, people can catch the lies.”

He kept going until they were far enough away to have officially escaped, but quickly changed topics once they were alone.

“We may be onto something with this cult shit. Who would willingly sit through that? But if the whole town is a cult, doesn’t that mean you, Miss Elle Reynolds, are about to become a very influential cult figure?”

[rightnowimloving]

this sums them up tbh

[jasperstjames]

indyerstraits​:

–

Canary Park was too lively and vibrant during the Renaissance Festival and it was no place for a young lush to expend his stash of half-drunken bottles but Jamie subscribed to hiding in plain sight and the amount of historically inaccurate tulle and ballroom gowns that filled the seats of the public play made a great hidey hole for someone who just needed a break. 

He was clad in his Marie’s uniform with his sherpa thrown on top, sides bulging with bottles. Jamie reclined in his seat as he polished off an old, stale mickey of Fireball to the sound of a dramatic soliloquy like a fancy connoisseur of the arts. He swirled his alcohol like wine before throwing it back, smacking his lips obnoxiously to his neighbours before discarding the trash beneath the seats. 

Apparently, Jamie wasn’t the only scourge on society who decided to make an appearance that afternoon when the grating voice of Jasper Banshee cut through the atmosphere laboriously created by the townies.

He cocked his head, delivering a steely look in Jasper’s direction. “It’s called A Midsummer’s Night Dream, you pleb. Hast thou ever attended a lit course? You know, for all the garbage you put out in The Banshee, one would assume that you’d be better read.”

━━▲━━

Jasper wasn’t hanging out that far from Jamie Dyer. He was close enough to smell the alcohol on his breath as he spoke, to clock that the guy had dumped his little mini bottle on the ground after he’d finished it, and to notice that there was definitely more where that came from.

Either Jamie Dyer loved or hated Shakespeare enough that he wanted to pregame it (though did it count as pregaming if it was in the middle of the game?) or Jamie Dyer was an alcoholic. And weirdly? Jasper was betting on the former.

“That the one with the donkey?” Jasper double checked only once the dude on his other side had fully re-immersed himself in the world of the play. A long-forgotten high school assignment had flicked on a lightbulb somewhere in the darkest part of the male’s brain for the most basic of plot points to come to him. Couple mix and match. There was a play within the play. Fairies...

 Wait. Was that why there were so many audience members dressed as fairies? Cosplay??

“I’ve read stuff. And I saw the movie.” It probably wasn’t helping his case to point it out, but Jasper had no intention of responding further to Jamie’s question that was clearly only meant to be an insult.

Instead, he decided to gesture towards the discarded bottle, nodding as he spoke. “Yo, you know littering is bad, right? And if you need alcohol to get through it, that’s a little pot/kettle. Thought you woulda been more... into this.”

[jasperstjames]

ellexreynolds​:

On any other day, the Renaissance Festival was the last place Elle would’ve wanted to be. And, if she was being honest, even today she was feeling that way. But, being who she was, and who she was engaged to, it was expected that she show up to any and all town events. It was always a drag, one that came with too much fake smiling and hand shaking, but she knew that it wasn’t worth the harsh words from her father if she didn’t show up.

So, she stood there, dressed in some ridiculous outfit that her mother had sent over for her to wear, watching whatever it was that was supposed to be going on in front of the gathered crowd.

If the outfits weren’t ridiculous enough, the way the people who were a little too into the festival only added to it. Elle had lost count of how many people had walked up to her and spoken to her in what felt like complete gibberish.

When she heard someone speak, seemingly to her, in a way that she could actually understand, she felt some relief. “I thought about looking it up, but I pulled out my phone earlier and about three different people all glared at me until I put it away. I had no idea people took this so seriously.”

━━▲━━

“They offered me a quill and ink when I said I was a member of the press,” Jasper confessed, relieved that Elle had only been masquerading as One Of Them.

He’d taken a risk in engaging with her when she was dressed appropriately for the occasion, but as incoming town royalty, it made sense that she would have enough town spirit to participate. That didn’t mean she had to actually like what she was participating in, though. And from their very brief conversation thus far, Jasper had a feeling they were on the same team.

“I’m excusing myself from these rules. How am I supposed to review something when I don’t even know what it means?” he demanded. “Do you think it’s a cult? I wasn’t thinking it but now I don’t know.”

Pausing before he could follow up with another thought, he eyed the exit. It hadn’t occurred to him until just then that by simply making an appearance he’d likely fulfilled his duty. Could he excuse himself from the festivities as a whole?

Voice low, he tilted his head towards a spot at the edge of the park. “I need some air in a judgment-free zone. Do you want to escape for a minute or are you really vibing with this poem?”

[jasperstjames]

teddyxmiller​:

WHO: Teddy & @jasperstjames​ WHERE: Outside La Bodega

La Bodega wasn’t a place that Teddy frequented often. Unlike others who went there in search of something a little stronger than what was offered at other stores, Teddy only went there to pick up some moonshine for his grandmother. It was one of the few things that helped to dull the pain brought on by her many ailments, and even if he didn’t think it was a good idea, he wasn’t going to deny her of it.

Whenever he went there, he tried to get in and out as quickly as he could. On top of everything else, the last thing he wanted was to be spotted with the liquor in hand. So, he stashed the bottle away in his backpack as he stepped outside, he attention focused on zipping up his bag rather than where he was going.

Clumsy wasn’t a word Teddy would use to describe himself, but he did have a tendency to bump into people on an almost regular basis. Most of the time, it was harmless, he could apologize quickly and move on. However, the person he bumped into as he stepped out onto the street just happened to be the one person in town that he’d been trying to avoid – Jasper St. James.

It wasn’t that Teddy had a problem with Jasper, because he didn’t. But, as someone who did what he could to keep a low profile, the last thing he wanted was to be around someone who seemed to want to do the opposite. Not to mention the fact that he worked for The Banshee, which was a tabloid he wanted nothing to do with after endless run-ins with reporters over the years.

“Oh, I’m so sorry.” He quickly apologized, keeping his head down.

━━▲━━

Believe it or not (and few would), Jasper St. James had no nefarious plans in mind when he made his way to La Bodega that evening. He hadn’t been tailing anyone for a quote or praying that there would be loose-lipped drunks hovering outside, paper bags concealing the beverages they’d recently purchased but already mostly downed. He hadn’t even considered asking the person behind the counter if they’d seen anything weird.

No, he’d gone to La Bodega because he had every intention of getting wasted that night. And he sure as fuck didn’t want to do it with his dad’s stupid expensive shit or his mom’s ten thousand year old wine from the cellar.

He was ready to spend the night cuddled up with some trash video games and some Jack Daniels, and every second that he didn’t have a handle in his hands was another second wasted on his big (read: incredibly depressing) Friday night.

He’d just parked and was about to head inside when he ran into a backpack-clad lad - a face he’d recognized due to a medium amount of internet stalking on a slow work day.

He had to thank whatever spirit out there was looking out for him, because running into a serial killer’s son was like a gift from the gods.

“No sweat,” he replied on auto-pilot. He may have hated doing it, but no one could say that he didn’t do his research on all things dramatic in Gravewood, and the Miller boy being back in town? Well, there was probably a story somewhere in there.

“Hey, I don’t know if you remember me. I’m Jasper.” The male was careful to leave out his last name, just in case his reputation had not preceded him. “Heard you moved back. Me too.”

[jasperstjames]

hopekang​:

~

In an odd twist of irony, Hope Kang could not stand the taste of Java Junkie’s coffee. She didn’t mind it when she got her job there, but one too many free shift drinks can ruin anything in due time. Of course, she took the free drink for all it was worth, but she always made her way to Marie’s on her days off for a half decent cup of coffee instead of subjecting herself to whatever Java Junkie was serving. 

Besides, on occasion she ran into Jamie and got to bug him for all of twenty minutes, and now Mack as well. It was a nice way to catch up with friends. She was actually socializing. Her younger self would be proud.

Today was no different. She did her rounds of friendly hellos, fielded a few questions about her new living situation, and slid an unnecessarily good tip underneath the emptied coffee mug. All there was left to do was get home, and continue to contemplate whether today was the day she was going to send those pictures to get her mystery man back for ghosting her. 

She had not been quite so receptive to chatting since the lodge, because it wasn’t the first time she had been stood up by him. Though, ever the people pleaser, she had yet to cut him off entirely. Every day, her finger hovered over the send button, pictures locked and loaded, just a little bit longer than the last, but she could never bring herself to commit to sending them. He had to have had his reasons. He seemed interested in her. Maybe he did actually live in Australia, and didn’t know how to tell her. It could be any number of reasons why things hadn’t panned out yet. Still, that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt every time plans fell through. 

In her distracted state, she barely noticed the person on the other side of the door, nearly walking directly into them. She blinked owlishly, processing the face in front of her, it taking only moments to click where she had seen it before. 

Jasper St. James. YouTube extraordinaire fallen from grace– not that she really followed him, his content was always crass and overall obnoxious. But her Mother had her finger on the pulse Gravewood news, and Jasper was nothing if not Gravewood worthy news. 

Regardless, Jasper had always been nice enough to Hope. She had never been the butt of any of his jokes or victim of any of his pranks in High School, which Hope still found surprising. She figured she would have been an easy target. He had always seemed so far out of her stratosphere that she figured he had forgotten she existed at some point.

But right now? He was just frozen in the middle of the doorway with his eyes locked on her, blocking her exit from the building. His face was unreadable until something clicked. Maybe it was recognition? 

“Hi Jasper,” She greeted, a friendly smile on her face, “A while, I’m sure. I don’t know that I’ve seen you since you’ve been back.”

━━▲━━

Jasper’s body may have been fully functional by that point, but that didn’t mean that it was acting normally. His fight or flight had been triggered and adrenaline was coursing through him, daring him to make a move one way or the other.

And yet beyond moving from his awkward freeze in the doorway, he’d chosen to do neither. He was still standing somewhat close to the door, hovering by the hostess stand with both the prayer that Marie would save him from himself and the hope that she would stay far away. And his brain sure wasn’t firing on all cylinders. Whether that was because of Hope’s mere presence or the smile she’d just graced him with as she actually said his name was anyone’s guess.

“Oh, yeah... hasn’t been that long since that happened. Though I guess some people would say it’s been forever. But don’t trust my mom on that - I think she’s actually happy to have me back in town. She may actually never let me leave again,” he joked, making every effort to appear cool, calm, and collected when internally he was cringing.

Their whole secret ‘I’m going to bare my soul to you and you can do it in return’ thing meant that he knew more about Hope Kang than Jasper St. James, wildcard TikToker who never went on cam sites, had any reason to. Though they hadn’t had a decent chat since his last disappearing act, he still knew enough to be aware of the fact that any joke about an overbearing mother might land weird. He didn’t even have an overbearing mom! He had exaggerated for dramatic effect. Mrs. St. James was normal!!

He had meant to put his best foot forward, but the adrenaline had caused him to overshoot and shove it right into his mouth.

Literally one minute into their conversation and he was killing it.

“Sorry about the-” he decided to gesture towards the door then, acknowledging the obvious freeze that she’d caught and been nice enough not to mention. The lie that slipped from his lips next came to him so quickly that he was satisfied his brain would finally be able to carry him through the rest of their (likely short) chat.

“You look different. It took me a minute... But how’ve you been?”

[jasperstjames]

mackenziegthomas​:

- - -

Mack had hoped that if she stood in the back for long enough, Jasper would disappear. She’d dragged out an entire two cigarettes, attempted to talk to the cook- and considered for a long moment doing some dishes. And at the end of all that, Jasper was still there, calling out her name as if she didn’t want to pretend he had vanished. Like magic- snapped up by the Mothman, or whichever cryptid, Mack actually didn’t care, but she hoped that he would be gone. 

He was the annoying little toddler following her constantly, attempting to talk even though she could barely understand what he was trying to attempt to say, and not understanding social cues. She’d made it pretty damn obvious that she didn’t want to be dealing with his shit. 

A real toddler might understand the words ‘go away.’

“Hello Jasper.” She deadpanned, her annoyance all over her face, mouth barely moving from the frown it became the moment she clocked in and saw him in her section. “Normally people run out of fries and take it as their queue to leave.”

Jasper clearly wouldn’t take the queue, and she jotted the order down on her notepad, “Another milkshake, too?”

“I have nothing interesting to offer you as fodder for a banshee fluff piece or some youtube exposé.” As if what Jasper did could be called journalism. “Have you considered doing a piece on the entitlement of the rich, and how their kids can waste their lives pretending to work for them?”

━━▲━━

“Being normal is vastly overrated,” Jasper tossed out, slurping up the last of the whipped cream at the bottom of his milkshake as if the simple act of trapping Mack in place would make her like him more.

He wasn’t stupid. He knew when his presence was not appreciated by the people he was gifting it to. But in a town like Gravewood? Where he didn’t have many/almost any friends? Jasper had to settle for the places where his presence could at least be tolerated. And nothing said ‘you have to tolerate me’ like a service job dependent on tips.

He pretended to think about the milkshake question for a second before diverting, drawing Mack’s attention back to the words he’d just quoted.

“Vastly overrated... I take no credit for those words, but I think it’s legit. I mean, right? Halloweentown. Classic. You ever see that movie? Was the Disney Channel... basic cable?”

It was an attempt to get her talking, get her opening up. He wasn’t necessarily trying to make a friend out of Mack Thomas, but he also wasn’t... not trying to do that. He had been back for months. He was lonely. And no offense to her, but he was getting desperate. He had to be if he was actively pursuing things with someone who so obviously disliked him.

But was it who he truly was or what he represented that Mack disliked?

While he was trying to pry open the door he could feel her trying to slam in his face, she was dropping the whole ‘the customer is always right’ thing in favor of a little honesty hour, and Mack’s words (though likely meant to be discouraging) were only making him want to try harder.

“Not as interesting coming from a nepotism baby. But since you mentioned it, how am I supposed to stop pretending if no one’s giving me a lead on some real news? Is that why no one’s giving anything up? Is it because I’m rich? Can’t help the life I was born into, Macaron. But let me buy both of us some milkshakes and I’d be happy to discuss the entitlement of the rich with you, at length.”

[jasperstjames]

Jasper liked to act as if he was large and in charge when walking the hallowed hall (there was only one) of the Banshee, but he was just as much of a worker bee as anyone else there.

Meaning that he answered to the queen... which was his mother.

She had been the one who assigned everyone their Renaissance Festival beats, and she was therefore the person that Jasper was directing his annoyance at present at. Because while he had been looking forward to watching two dudes essentially try and kill each other while riding horses at full speed, wielding giant sticks as weapons, that hadn’t been the path his mother had chosen for him.

Instead he’d been assigned an article on poetry.

It was miserable. Somewhere after the last ‘wherefore’ he’d tuned out, the lame-ass costumes already killing the vibe for him before the bad poetry finished the job.

Why were there so many fairies? Wasn’t the renaissance a real time period?

“Is there a Google Translate for this?” he asked the person nearest him once he’d felt like he’d had enough. He ignored the dirty look the person on his other side gave him as he reached for his obviously modern cellular device, breaking the illusion worse than he already had by showing up in normal clothes.

[jasperstjames]

Jasper truly had nothing better to do that day than haunt Marie’s.

He’d long ago decided to be an annoying little fly buzzing in the ear of whatever poor, unfortunate soul he just so happened to zero in on, and lucky Mack Thomas had been assigned his section for the lull between lunch and dinner. He’d been working on her for over thirty minutes and she’d yet to crack.

It wasn’t like he didn’t appreciate her whole... thing. Missing sister? Rough. The town’s cops weren’t shit. But he was bored and desperate for a story, and Mack was there. And fate (or Marie herself, since she’d been the hostess upon his arrival) had actually gone so far as to trap them together, because he was somehow the only one in her section.

“Mack Thomas,” he sing-songed as soon as he spotted her emerge from the kitchen. He was seated at the back booth nearest the kitchen door, so he knew she had to have heard him. Had she been avoiding him? Would she accept his call?

Thankfully, it was literally her job to deal with him. People could say what they wanted about him (the haters made him famous), but he was a notoriously good tipper. All he asked was for a friendly little bit of conversation and he was an easy enough customer.

The longer the seconds went by in silence, the more he began to worry.

(He hadn’t like... accidentally called her waitress instead of using her name, right? He’d done that once and it hadn’t gone over well.)

Leaning up against the back of his booth, he tried to make himself appear casual as he continue to wait for her to approach. He didn’t let his relief show when she actually showed up, but he did offer a smile.

“Hello, Mack. Heard anything interesting lately? Also, can I get more fries?”

@mackenziegthomas​ ​

[jasperstjames]

It was a light scoop day for Jasper St. James.

He hadn’t been back in town for all that long by the time he’d realized that every couple of months, people liked to take a break from the drama and simply concentrate on continuing to exist. It was the eye of the hurricane period, the months-to-years stretch between earthquakes where everyone began to wonder if they’d finally ended for good. Gravewood was consistent, the town’s drama hangovers occurring with enough regularity that Jasper knew he was about due to shake things up again.

But no one was biting.

That was how he’d ended up prowling the street that morning, looking for news in any place he could find it. Hanging around La Bodega, hesitating around the Mayor’s Office, and eventually landing around the entrance to Marie’s.

He’d just decided that he was probably more likely to get gossip from eavesdropping on the brunch crowd when he opened the door and almost crashed right into Hope Kang.

He hadn’t allowed himself the full disaster moment, the very sight of the girl thankfully having him freezing in place, but at what cost? Because he’d been stopped mid-step. In the middle of the doorway. Like some weirdo.

What was he supposed to do? Or say?

When he’d stumbled upon her on the (now beloved) chat site they both frequented, he’d recognized her instantly. It had also caused a level of panic within him the level of which being arrested at Taylor Swift’s abode hadn’t even managed to rouse (he was feeling some of that again in that moment).

He knew Hope Kang. He had all sorts of ideas in his head of what she was probably like, built up after years of avoiding her from the moment their hands had touched when he borrowed her pencil in the sixth grade. He kept loose tabs on her on Facebook, followed her from his finsta, knew enough to piece things together... he’d sent flowers to her house (anonymously and directed at the family as a whole) when her brother had passed.

It was not stalker behavior.

He had not at all been looking for Hope when he’d hit his low point and ended up legitimately just tipping girls to have someone to talk to. What he’d been after was a semi-to-fully nude therapist, someone to hear his problems and then never see him again. He’d stumbled across a few who had been pretty decent before fate had brought them together.

By that point he’d had to add a little more than a hat to his disguise. He’d lowered his voice, taken on an Australian accent, added glasses, and kept himself in low lighting at all times, his computer screen functioning as close to a ring light as he was going to allow in order to protect his identity.

She therefore didn’t know that the mysterious man who had legitimately poured out his heart and soul to her was Jasper St. James. And at the rate they were going, she never would. He’d asked to meet up several times, but chickened out last minute. By the time he’d worked up the courage to reveal himself at the ski lodge, the universe had prevented it from happening by plunging that place into an unreachable darkness.

How could one not take that as a sign?

But that didn’t mean that he could gracefully dip out of their public encounter. Not when she’d already turned to look at him. He had to make things seem... normal.

So, he spoke up... at a slightly higher pitch than normal, just in case. His body finally allowed him to resume a normal range of motion too.

“Hope Kang! As I live and breathe. How long has it been since we had a chat?”

@hopekang​

[rozrozhollander]

@goldinhersoul​ asked: 😏😏😏 - JJ Maybank (Outer Banks)

[jasperstjames]