Greetings and Salutations

20 | they/he/it Hi, I'm Joey, and I'll be your waiter tonight. The wine list is on the back of the menu, and there's a specials list just over there. In the meanwhile, can I offer you a jug of water? Would you like any ice with that?

[hotvampireadjacent]

[avantgarden-er]

not to be rude but if you’re losing consciousness you should dial for an ambulance not just use the computer.

I would liveblog Anything

[byjove]

this gay bdsm porn bot is talking to me like I’m his dog and he just got home from work. it’s working a little.

[desolationlesbian]

farcille isn't "toxic yuri." nothing remotely toxic about them, they both treat each other with a great deal of care and affection and respect. just because marcille is willing to do forbidden necromancy and arguably cannibalism for her wife doesn't make her toxic that's just what you do for a woman with broad shoulders

[netscapeshawty]

baseball different from how i remember it

[qualitytimeswithqualitylads]

glad they added new maps to baseball

[maidslime]

mom's minion memes for real justice

i posted these originally like 9 or 10 years ago or something but I can't find them anywhere, so now you get retortured.

[byjove]

A guide on Mount Everest, 57 year old Hillary Dawa Sherpa, was separated from the British climber he had been hired to guide, ran out of oxygen, fell into a crevasse, was trapped in the crevasse for 2 and a half days before freeing himself and walking/crawling back towards base camp. He was alone on the mountain for 6 days.

[byjove]

Yes! Just to clarify, he was found alive and most reports state he was only treated for frostbite on his hands and a fracture. He survived on chocolate and chunks of ice for almost a week while descending Everest alone and injured.

[weirdstrangeandawful]

I hope people start considering the irony of putting #ban Everest tourism in the notes of a post about a Sherpa. Whilst many Sherpas have called for a temporary pause in Everest tourism, the proportion of them calling for an outright ban is incredibly small.

The question of Everest tourism is a complex issue for locals and I’m begging people to learn about the issue before slapping their opinion on a post about a Sherpa of all people.

Also, maybe stop and think about why your first reaction when hearing a story about how a commercial industry failed a Sherpa is to think ‘yeah, we should make sure they don’t have employment actually’…

[ubuyo]

liking a character from a thing you don’t like

[sapphireh3arts]

i know folks are gonna call me a pedo for this one, but i grew up seeing my mom and grandma naked. they had health issues and at times needed care and help showering. and i truly think more kids need to be shown the nonsexual reality of naked women at a young age. there is nothing sexual about my grandmothers breasts, they were simply body parts. more women die of heart attacks because people are too afraid of breasts to do real chest compressions, because they are scared to touch their breasts. the sexualization of our bodies literally kills us. i need people to be more normal about naked bodies and i'm 100% serious.

[genderqueerpositivity]

Minnesota’s Giant Rainbow and Leather Pride Flags

June 28, 1998. Both flags measured approximately 50 feet wide and 75 feet long.

[ryuutchi]

Friendly reminder that the leather flag predates almost every other flag. We owe this community to leather daddies and kinksters

[nightmarechamillian]

In the era of corporate sanitization never forget it was leather daddies and S&M folks who protected some of the earliest pride parades.

[demilypyro]

phone somehow autocorrected "the joker" to "the worker." why so devoid of class consciousness, batman

[demilypyro]

[miidniite]

Lou (lavonte): do you know the names of the pacman ghosts?

Murph *completely serious*: inky, blinky, pinky, sue. sometimes clyde.

L: is that true?

M: absolutely.

[quinn-of-aebradore]

I love City Council of Darkness cause you have Brennan being like “I have absolutely no way to honor you guys succeeding there because of how insane you proceeded to act” and then ten minutes later he shows up with something equally insane but then it swings back around to Zac saying “I don’t read. I get mad that the letters don’t do other things,” which causes Brennan to make this face;

Like the Intrepid Heroes are On Some Shit no matter what campaign they’re in, but I swear to god, the coterie has unlocked a new level of unhinged in them. There is no straight man in this party. Every single one of them is doing loop-de-loops in a Bingo-Dingo bus around this town but also none of them are at the wheel and the buses are diving headfirst off the starwalk into the quarry.

[iraffiruse]

[tim-official]

see every time i see this status i get angry because i’ve played through literally every scenario in rct1 and there is no place where this is a thing. there is never more than one park per map. and in rct2 you can’t make that happen i the scenario editor either. it is not remotely within the game’s functionality to simulate two discrete parks and these games were coded in assembly for christ sake so it’s not like someone modded it in by adding the line “int const TOTAL_NUM_POSSIBLE_PARKS = 2;”. there is no conceivable way this post is anything close to true and even though i know how writing all this out reflects upon me as a person and even though i know exactly how meaningless and trifling of a takedown attempt this is on some random facebook screencap with hundreds of thousands of notes im going to post it anyway because i’m too petty to have any say in the matter

[byjove]

*hits the joint* In the Harry Potter universe, Merlin is canonically a Hogwarts alumni and a Slytherin, which is impossible because Merlin predates the existence of Hogwarts by centuries. Of course, JK Rowling didn’t know that because she is a dumb bitch. I’m sorry. Misogynistic phrasing. She is a willfully ignorant and hateful, deeply unlikable and ill-informed, untalented and unspeakably cruel…..person. Seriously, how could you write a series about British wizards without truly understanding THE British wizard. Anyway, Merlin would never be able to attend any sort of organized schooling. He’s definitely self-taught in every universe because he’s the most powerful wizard ever AND he’d have been expelled from any institution before he stepped through the door. The only reason they haven’t escorted him away from Camelot is because he can see the future and he is kind of like the king’s dad. I was so disappointed by BBC Merlin. I turned it on and I was like “What the fuck is this shit, where is my perverted old man?”

[rabioheab-deactivated20200416]

earlier this year 2 boys got expelled from my school for going on a teachers email and sending another teacher an email that says “you’re a disgusting little man” and i laugh about it all the time because imagine opening an email from your coworker and thinking it’s important and then it says that

[russsiawave]

[postilionstruckbylightning]

I don’t like how you put these two photos together, as if to imply that the dumplings with the paw print have anything to do with this sweet, innocent angel who has never done anything wrong.