Gal Palin' Around

[yvaeltel]

me: i want to die

me: oh no what if my friends get worried

me: i want to die™

me: that’s better ,, now it’s ‘ironic’

[rupindork-deactivated20130712]

Did Jordin Sparks ever figure out how to breathe with no air

[florals780]

when was the last time u heard anything about jordin sparks. i rest my case

[problematicgay]

[alycyn]

trying to be interested in something u clearly hate

[adm-kng]

Jasper National Park by Adam King | instagram

[i-am-bechloe-trash]

Pitch Perfect + Pitch Perfect 2: Beca Mitchell Character Development

[poisonspoison]

Best of the 7/27 Tour: 6/? | Lauren - Dublin, Ireland - 10/4

[paper-daisy]

So I’m just road tripping across the USA and I just …

[hailgein]

aesthetic: alice isn’t dead

[jessgalpalinaround]

me during non-olympics season: man i hate Sport. can't stand all these sweaty people on tv all the time. can't imagine dedicating my life to the almighty Sport

me during the olympics: mom i'm quitting my job and selling my car to become a pro fencer

[ivyist]

plot twist: the lesbian shoots the straight white male lead 

[do9]

[clover9216]

*sipping tea*

[shutupmerlin]

I have made an error.

My brother attends a fairly exclusive private boys school that is incredibly religious.

He is going on this weird, intense camp with them next week and all the families have been asked to write personal letters saying why they love them and why they are proud of them.

I told my mother I was just going to enclose a massive drawing of a penis and she absolutely forbid me from doing so.

Anyway so the third page of my letter is a massive veiny penis with ‘SORRY MUM’ written as if it’s ejaculate.

Other quotes from my letter include

- I’m sorry this is handwritten, our printer is fucked. It feels so archaic I might as well be writing this on a cave wall in my own blood. - I am so much better at Pokemon than you. Sorry this isn’t a reason I love you, I’m just really good at Pokemon.

- Thanks for putting up with me even when I come into your room at 3am, drunk and insisting you smell the bacon lipgloss I found.

- My favourite moments between us are the ones where we’re drenched in animal blood, performing the appropriate sacrifices to maintain our youth.

- I’m proud of how quickly you can shove broccoli stems up your nose to diffuse tension at the dinner table.

And so on. These letters were submitted to the school yesterday.

I have just found out they are proofread by the principal and the school’s church leaders, and then read aloud to all the boys on the camp.

A Father is going to read the phrase ‘Suck it bitch’, directed at my brother, in front of 50 other 17 year old boys, whilst on church camp.

[miraculous-enby-bug]

#the envelope said ‘i licked this so you can clone me later.’ (via)

[elipizza]

LAUREN WANTS US ALL DEAD 😻👅💦

[sunflowercocoa]

okay so in psychology years ago we learnt that it’s common for companies to put women in charge when there’s a predicted downfall so that they could be all ha see women suck at being in charge. and I just find it interesting how the UK is gonna have a female PM right after Brexit so like years from now people are gonna be like “the country saw some of its worst years under a woman” when it was men that fucked it up and then ran

[confide--nemini]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glass_cliff

[dynastylnoire]

Glass cliff Holy shit

[folk-me-gently]

[100493503004422]

hate when I am wearing makeup & still look shitty like what else am I supposed to do? get enough sleep? eat right & exercise? as if