Journey into the Midbar

[jitm-blog1]

Living on emunah pt 2

So a large sum of money just appeared in my bank account קא"ה" After much investigation I found it to be a legitimate deposit. I thought it was just a sign to say that the Oibeshter could change things at the last moment if he wanted, and to never lose faith. Of course I hadn’t haha, but it was a good support. So now I’m well on my way to being able to fly to the holy land! ב"ה!

[jitm-blog1]

Living on emunah...

Midweek I ran out of money, but I don't care. I know that H' will provide what I need. Maybe not what I want at the time, but what I need. I was offered a free ride on public transport to get to where I needed to but I thought I had to make my own way by busking. It's amazing, my wisdom advances so quickly that all I say or do seems like ridiculous nonsense immediately after I do it. That's a part of life I suppose. I feel that something big will happen this week, and it's off to a great start. A large chunk of my ego was given up/taken by/from me motzi Shabbos. I feel so happy that my beloved still brings me closer to him despite my many sins. I hope that I can bring Him at least some joy through my efforts. It is an incredible journey, I cannot express enough how powerful it is. Going to sleep now, a new week of back breaking spiritual (and hopefully phisical too!) labour approaches. Goodnight my sweet dears.

[jitm-blog1]

Employment troubles...

I did not get the job. However a friend called me before this news and told me I could get a job with him. And so further I wait...

[jitm-blog1]

Gainful employment.

A job I had applied for before the exile seems to be progressing well. It seems that the Lord may have decided against me moving to Israel at once. If I get this job I shall stay for now. If not then not. I’ll keep you posted.

[jitm-blog1]

Another update on non-attachment

I’m trying to change tact in experiencing dveikus. Initially, I was trying to enter into meditation to find Ein Sof within. However, it doesn’t really suit me. yesterday and today, I tried to develop better love through prayer and had really the best day today, dissolved in the love of Hash-m. The yeitzer hora was greatly weakened. I simply didn’t think of sinning when I was engaged with Hash-m. Additionally, I further developed bitachon in the Oibershter and myself. Things tend to be difficult to do when I don’t want to do them and I waste a lot of time. Today I tried just doing what I felt like (in the Neshoma, not the Nefesh), and, while I may not have done it all consistently or in one big go, everything fell in place and went absolutely perfectly, truthfully. My engagement was such that I didn’t feel like checking my phone every 15 minutes or using any of the stuff I don’t feel I need. I enjoyed the outdoors more, as well as playing with my nephew. The connection I’ve formed with him is so much deeper when I don’t bend to delusions of ego. I don’t expect my than he can do. And yet, he does it for me! Now I really understand in pirkei avos where it says “bend your will to his will, so that he will bend the will of others to yours”. May we all become bound up in the bonds of life and achieve permanent dveikus with Hash-m so that we may fulfill our life in this world and not spend it in complete hevel. Be well my dear ones (that goes for you non-Jewish seekers too!)

[jitm-blog1]

Update on non-attachment

So it seems I can’t get rid of my stuff physically, until I have detached from it spiritually. Looks like there is more physicality to shed. I’m going to try to “achieve” this over Shabbos. I’ll let you know how it goes!

גוט שבת!

P.S This is on a queue, so you may receive this after Shabbos. Realise I was still praying for an loving you all, even though you didn’t know it.

גוט וואך!

[jitm-blog1]

A continuation...

A most amazing occurrence! Each moment delivers a new gift. I am absolutely uncertain about my future. Such events occur so rapid fire, that it wipes certainty from my mind. All I can do is take the actions I can, and may the Most High remove impediments to my growth.

[jitm-blog1]

Selling stuff is harder than it looks.

Apparently, nobody wants my stuff. This is fitting. However, I am presently lost on how to dispose of it. Maybe charities? I’ll keep you all informed.

[jitm-blog1]

Selling things!

The first step in leaving your whole life behind is to get rid of everything. Money is also a useful thing to take with you that doesn’t take up a lot of space and has a lot of flexibility. Therefore, the first step on my journey is to sell everything I can’t bring! Currently I am posting advertisements online for some of the easy things as well as contemplating what is really necessary. For instance, do I need a phone? I don’t think so! Drop me messages with your handy cheap travel hacks and tips! I’m trying to take as little as possible and not get caught up in spending too much!

[jitm-blog1]

The preliminaries begin!

Hello all.

After much personal strife at home, a thirst for Torah, no job, and a lack of interest in university and the societal dreams of wealth, dissatisfaction and emptiness, I decided to go on a journey. With only Hashem to support me, I will travel to Israel, live in the moment and see what happens! Hopefully I will be blogging daily/weekly, although I will be relying on free Wifi a lot. So I will write everything on paper *gasp* and then queue them up when I get some WiFi. Please message, question etc. This will be my main source for consistent human contact haha! So join me!