I can see Tropicana in your eyes.

Everyone's been doing emails.

[rhapsodicdaisies]

[coffeenonsense]

apparently the director of the no fucking til marriage movie is like "it's not the sex purge movie, that's not what it's about" but my guy I'm sorry you made the sex purge movie. that's what you did. like describe it however you want but conceptually the film is about a nation wide sex fest on the one day a year fucking is permitted by the state, that's a sex purge. the film can be about a wholesome romance happening during the sex purge but it is definitely the sex purge.

[coffeenonsense]

Wait ok so vanity fair just came out with an article describing the rules of the sex purge & apparently it's enforced bc the us government literally chipped its citizens like dogs with biomoniters that glow green when you're allowed to fuck. what in the conservative vanilla hell 😂😂😂

also apparently queer people in this universe just said "no thanks" when it came to this ban which is kind of based actually:

[dontbelasagnax]

Mentioned to my mom I'm asexual a couple months ago and today.... we got into the car and she hit me with, "So you use they/them pronouns now?"

I went, "What. no. she/her."

"How does that work? With she/her/hers and they/them?"

I stared at her. "What are you talking about?"

"Well you came out as-" and I said, "I'm asexual."

She replied, "Like an amoeba, I know."

"Oh. My god. No. Mom. It doesn't- it's not the asexual you learned about in biology. I didn't come out as a single celled organism."

With heavy relief, she said "Oh, it has a different meaning?"

"Yes, mom."

[savetheworldkissaplushie]

[caesarsaladinn]

and here, class, we see a heifer attempting to impregnate a bull:

[stupit]

[goblinparty]

when u pull a freaky girl but aren't fully prepared for all that entails

[xanaxfarts]

Reflections of a diamond, moissanite, and crystal zirconia shown during a diamond authenticity inspection. photos: Alan Hodgkinson

[noknowshame]

why is religious Christmas imagery all so joyful and pleasant? where is the inherent horror of the birth of Christ? A mother is handed her newborn child, wailing and innocent. Her hands come away sticky. Red. Simply by giving her son life she has already killed him. He is doomed from the beginning. Her love will not save him from suffering. Because the thing cradled in her arms is not a baby, it is a sacrifice: born amongst the other bleating animals whose blood will one day be spilled in the name of what demands it. the night is silent with anticipation. Mary, did you know? That your womb was also a grave?

[noknowshame]

[browniefox]

[pansyfemme]

cd has a hole. record has a hole. casette has 2 holes. streaming? zero holes. i think i’ve made my point

[raph560]

[pictures-of-dogs]

cannonball!

[bwaah]

do I have to do everything myself around here

[persianmom-deactivated20251026]

what will it be, boss? the comfort of misery or the pain of change?

[wizard-of-interesting-failure]

[redarmyscreaming]

[hikikomoricomplex]

i just don’t feel like we as a society ever fully processed deedee megadoodoo

[hikikomoricomplex]

a cop pulls somebody over for a traffic stop when she gets flattened by a poop truck cause the driver of the poop truck was jerkin his shit nasty style and they report the cop’s name was deedee megadoodoo are you fucking with me right now????

[flanbolt]

[galactic-mayhem]

saw this on pinterest but i think it belongs here too

[vinnie-vindictive]

this will never not be important

[adamtotscomix]

[maverick-ornithography]

[highkeygay]

She’s getting the tea henny

[femmewitch-deactivated20190613]

and she’s gagging 

[magicfingers-blog]

[tinybed]

[comealongphil]

dawn dimmadome? wife of doug dimmadome, owner of the dimmsdale dimmadome?

[punkrorschach]

actually she took the dimmadome in the dimmadivorce