I would be out of my depth in a parking lot puddle

🎶there's something strange in my neighborhood🎶- oh wait...shit, nevermind it's just my crippling Constantine obsession

[jesncin]

Questiontine Hellsager (The Question Vic Sage x John Constantine) AGAIN For @goldfishinaplasticbag! Thank you for donating once more to @dcforgaza (requests closed). The lung cancer lovers and enjoyers are back. Tried to push the gay energy more on this one.

[johnconstanbean]

@nihtscada !!!

[camrydealership]

found this timeline in a trade if anyone’s interested

[liavvna-deactivated20260210]

lazy drawing in honor of me finally starting reading hellblazer stuff!!!!

[valvelocitydefender]

guhhhh dont like this but we ball.

[sardineincan]

[mucousnnembrane]

body pillows potentially...

[canonplag]

waiting

[camrydealership]

i feel so maternal for mucous membrane era john ☹️☹️☹️

[valvelocitydefender]

stupid fuckass creature

[johnconstanbean]

America Au where Constantine is pastor at a mega church and Chas is a truck driver with a thick southern accent

[nerdybitch]

John Constantine's dad headcanons

John Constantine who's a bad father. John Constantine who if he ever got fully custody of his children would still be regularly found passed out hungover in his bathroom, on his living room floor, or half-naked in bed. John Constantine who gets so wrapped up in bullshit, supernatural and otherwise that he forgets big events like school recitals, talent shows. John Constantine who apologizes and swears up and down he'll do better next year. John Constantine who does the same thing all over again the next year and feels horrible about it. John Constantine whose self-destruction and self-loathing puts his children in danger. John Constantine whose children have to regularly witness breakdown into heaving sobs on the bathroom floor after rough nights when he's so drunk the alcohol doesn't seem to be helping him hide his feelings anymore. John Constantine who despite trying his best to shield his child, ends up warning them about the world's cruelty far too early. John Constantine whose paranoia sometimes makes him come off as controlling, because he knows what’s out there. John Constantine who accidentally parentifies his children in some ways. But also, John Constantine who would never hit his kids. John Constantine who would try his best to make up for events he misses by forcing Chas and Renee to attend living room 'talent-shows' so his kid can show off everything he missed. John Constantine who when he finds out his kid is being bullied at school, show's up personally to scare the shit out of whoever is picking on them. John Constantine who makes Chas drive his kid around just so they don’t have to ride the bus. John Constantine who swears he doesn’t cook, but when money’s short he’ll burn his way through a terrible attempt at beans on toast just to avoid his kid going hungry. John Constantine who desperately wants to give his children a better life than he ever had. John Constantine who scares his children away from magic because he knows the toll it takes. John Constantine who tries his best, even if most the time his best isn't enough.

John Constantine whose worst nightmare is his kid growing up to be just like him.

[johnconstanbean]

Jason: sneaks into Tim's room and steals the 'Red' from Tim's name like some sorta fae

Damian: beats up Tim Everytime Tim introduces himself as anything related to 'robin'

Civilian to Tim: so... what's the 'RR' on your suit stand for again?

Tim, exhausted and barely functional: ...rest and relaxation...man

[mucousnnembrane]

I call this one "angel-verse john in a nutshell"

I have so many little headcannons about "my" John that I thought I'd make him a ref! Enjoy <3

[conjobthehellblazer]

Sun out tum out

[johnconstanbean]

I need to hire a random blonde guy for my birthday to dress up as John Constantine, talk in a British accent and just wander around smoking while making off putting comments that make everyone slightly uncomfortable

(free liquor will be available for anyone interested)

[mustasekittens]

putting him in a jar and shaking him violently

[thereifling]

Fantasy au Batstantine