We'll be alright @jonnachtjapon - Tumblr Blog

you see a red-bellied woodpecker and learn that it's called that and go "that's weird, seems like it should be called a red-headed woodpecker given that the amount of red on its belly is WAY less prominent than the red on its head"

and then you learn that there's already a red-headed woodpecker and you see it and you go "oh wait no THAT is a red-headed woodpecker. for sure. no doubt. my bad."

sapphireclaw

The beasts in question:

raskolnyxov

// arcane spoilers

the dictatorship leaving caitlyn’s body when she sees her girl wearing bandages as a shirt

trans-ralsei

caughtthedarkness93

I love my job, but reblogging employment jelly for someone else I love.

catchymemes

booksandpaperss

Suzanne collins wrote a trilogy where a main media propaganda strategy was to market a horrific act of violence as a love story to distract ppl and then it got adapted into a box office breaking movie and ppl made it all about the love triangle. so then since they didn’t get the point the first time Suzanne collins wrote a prequel story about the main dictator and she makes it so that you as a reader want it to be a genuine love story so badly even tho it’s so very clearly not and instead feels extremely unsettling to make her point even more meta which then gets adapted into another box office breaking film and now ppl are making romantic snowbaird tik toks. do u think she’s gonna write another book that’s somehow even more blatant or just give up and start executing ppl? hard to say but I wouldn’t blame her for the second one

toastbutteregg

byjove

I’m thinking about how my grandma had this guy who was super into her, enlisted in the army and sent her pictures of himself laying on his bunk staring at her picture moodily. She was not into him in the slightest. But it’s the funniest fucking picture of all time. Teenagers do not change. He’s someone’s Pappaw now. That’s crazy to me. He probably thinks of my grandmother as the foxy one that got away.

byjove

The fact that she kept it for 58 years is even funnier. I was like “Who the hell is this?” and she let out an exasperated sigh and was like “That was [NAME]. He was in love with me.” Feelings very much not reciprocated for soldier boy.

byjove

I think this incident is so funny to me because it reminded me of girls my age screenshotting cringy conversations with horrible horny men and posting them in the group chat for everyone to see. I think of all those extremely horny and verbose historical love letters in museums dating back as long as humans have been able to write. I wonder if there was a caveman who made cave art to impress a possible mate but it was so bad she made a point of visiting the cave every year to show her friends and laugh at it.

monsterfluffersrus

Before my grandmother passed away, we were going through some old pictures and there was a man there that I had never seen before in a photo with my grandmother and then another photo of this man in a military uniform. I asked her who it was and she laughed, and said "Oh! That's a boy I knew in school! He wrote to me when he joined the service." She then leaned in conspirator style: "He would tell people I was his girl so they would leave him alone. He had a boyfriend you know." My grandmother was someone's beard back in the day.

totallysilvergirl

That last addition made my day.

unculture

I met someone whose mom was a serial beard for gay men from her home country. As in she was a naturalized US citizen from [west african country im not blowing her up!] and serially married friends-of-friends from the same country. after each one got their green card they would happily divorce her and join her coterie of brilliant fascinating gay BFFs.

literally THEE most badass hag on earth, hope she's still out there lying like an angel.