My Edging Journey

Hi there, I’m Ren, Bi, 22F. Indiana. I’ve been interested in T&D and other kinky things for a while, and I’ve decided to document my edging journey here! Please feel free to submit asks or challenge/task instructions! BDSMLR: JunoQuxxn. Fetlife: Ren 2917

[junoquxxn1]

Day 10

Hello Tumblr friends! I’m sure you’ve been missing my daily posts, but the reason I haven’t posted in the last few days isn’t because I gave up on my resolution to stay denied… it’s because nothing interesting was going on!

I’ve been very busy the last week or so, and so Sir graciously allowed me the priviledge of giving me strict no-touch for 9 days. Believe me, it was hard, but Sir knew what he was doing, making sure I did my work… and not being allowed to touch making my brain drip out from between my legs at the same time.

Today, since the worst of my business has passed, Sir decided to let me edge by giving me 5 edges for each day of no-touch…

45 edges in one day.

I began my morning with a few edges, but Sir said they didn’t count since I wasn’t plugged. So i put my new plug in for the first time, a little rusty after so long without wearing one, and managed 15 edges in the afternoon. These were close edges, and I barely stopped in time several times. I finally dragged my hands away before I had to get busy. I slipped the plug out a bit later and got to work again.

Amazingly, I kept my hands off until bedtime, where I could finally put my plug back in and enjoy feeling nice and full… and then proceeded to rub and browse tumblr… to be honest, I don’t even know how many edges I got.

It was 30 for sure, I think. But I was rubbing for almost an hour. Not thinking, just rubbing. Surely Sir won’t mind if I accidentally did a few extra…

Now it’s off to bed for me. Dripping, desperate, and most importantly, denied.

[junoquxxn1]

Day 4

10/4/21

I am still denied!

I’ve been completely swamped this weekend with school and other responsibilities and haven’t had the time at all to devote to denial. I asked Sir if I could have another day of no-touch, and he gave me exactly what I asked for… by extending my no-touch to one week.

I guess I should be careful what I ask for, huh?

[junoquxxn1]

Day 1 (again!)

10/1/21

Yesterday was a great day! I had a busy morning that was full of stress, so it was wonderful coming home in the afternoon, getting all settled in, and then I spent a good hour edging and edging and getting nice and close… and then finally, I let myself go over! I actually came twice back-to-back and was so relaxed, it felt great! I then got all snuggled into pajamas and had a quiet night in!

But today begins the first day of a new denial session… and this time it’s with a whole new dom! I’m looking forward to it, but there’s only one problem: he’s starting me on 3 days of no-touch at all. Going from touching every single day to nothing so quickly is definitely going to be rough. I’ve been spending my day distracting myself so I don’t think about it, but that’s not going to work forever.

So please, send me as many teasing messages as you’d like so I can spend this no-touch period as Sir wants… denied, drippy, and most importantly, desperate!

[junoquxxn1]

Day 7:

One whole week denied.

What a journey it’s been already. A whole week is wonderful.

To celebrate, I decided to give myself a very nice session. I began with a brand new makeup brush with a nice big, fluffy top, and so lightly let it brush over my legs, my lips, my pussy, brush, brush, brush, but not enough to edge. For 30 minutes.

It made me insanely wet, which made part 2 even easier. I rubbed my clit, for about another 25 minutes until I just couldn’t stand it anymore… and then I took my hands up. Got up, used the bathroom, got a drink of water. And then I returned, kept rubbing my clit until I thought one more touch would make me explode.

Then came the Orajel. I rubbed it in, let it sit for a minute and felt the burn, and then kept on rubbing. No stimulation, all numb, but that meant I could keep rubbing my clit as long as I wanted. No orgasms for me. I’m a good girl.

A very good, drippy, needy girl who can’t think straight and whose body is aching SO BAD to cum. But I won’t. I don’t want to. <3

Tomorrow’s meant to be my cum date. And then a whole new month starts!

[junoquxxn1]

What are your feelings about hypno and edging?

I used to be really into hypno, but I haven’t done it in a while. I do still like it, but I’m not as into it as I used to be!

[junoquxxn1]

Glad to see you taking care of yourself and taking things steady. It's good to see you supporting yourself and setting boundaries. We're here for you and want you to be the best girl you can be.

Thank you very much! It’s sweet to know that some people care! It’s hard when you talk to people who don’t realize there’s an actual person on the other side of the screen, not just a robot/set of holes.

[junoquxxn1]

Well done on the six days!

The idea of the oragel on the clit on your theoretical.cumndate sounds like an excellent one - and here's hoping you do get to 6 months! ;)

Thank you very much! I’m very proud of the six days so far! You’re very right… the idea is becoming better and better to me, though I’m sure I’ll be so needy at the end of the month I’ll have to be reminded again why denial is so important. <3

[junoquxxn1]

Day 6

6 whole days… I’m so proud of myself! 6 whole days denied! I know yesterday I hit a rough patch, but I pushed through and made sure to take the afternoon today after work to do some self-care and get my mental state back to where it should be… and the horniness came right back, good as new!

I learned a lesson about jumping into things without thinking clearly, and I also learned that when I’m struggling, the best thing I can do is go on no-touch. That way I can stay a good girl. <3

Right now, I’m supposed to cum in 2 days… but I’m considering on that last day, getting right to the very, very edge, and then taking my hands off, letting the edge fade away, and stepping into my month of denial.

I’ve also considered placing Oragel on my clit, so it’s nice and numb, and giving myself a timer to cum. And when it doesn’t happen, I know I clearly didn’t want it badly enough, so that must mean I need another month to get really nice and desperate. ;)

It makes me really wet to think about.

I finally got horny again and laid down to edge. I got to the edge fairly quickly, and then I had a bright idea. I took about half a pea’s worth of Orajel and rubbed it right on my clit. I took my hands off and let the minty burning sensation go for a moment before I started to rub and…

Nothing. It was like I didn’t even have a clit anymore. Absolutely numb. I kept rubbing and rubbing and rubbing… but totally numb and no edges in sight. It was so unbelievably frustrating!!!

Finally, I gave up. Hands off, and just went about my day, with my numb little clit keeping me far away from the edge.

6 whole days. I can’t wait until I can say 6 whole months!

[junoquxxn1]

Brazilians aren’t that expensive. Sounds like an excuse to me.

I’m a student, already broke. If you want to pay the $60 (not including tip)/month for me to go get it done regularly, I will 😂, but I can’t afford it lol! Sorry to disappoint!

[junoquxxn1]

Since you lied to us your punishment should be to roll 1 die, edge yourself that many times in the parking lot, right before an appointment for a Brazilian wax.

I do like the idea of a Brazilian, but it’s so expensive I don’t think I could keep up with it!

[junoquxxn1]

Day 5:

Today has been a day. I started off this morning edging my mind away, so wet I could hardly stand it. I could hardly drag my mind off of my clit even though I really had to work, and I didn’t end up getting anything done all day!

Ive been talking to tons of people on Reddit and here, and everyone’s been wanting a shot at giving control! It’s been very nice having so many people being so supportive and helpful!

That being said, I was working with one person who seemed like a good choice and their “dom” side was completely different than their “chat” side. After, I had a really bad case of subdrop. That often happens to me coming out of an intense session especially in an online scenario and without any kind of aftercare. I also got really lightheaded a while afterwards, I think because I hadn’t drank water all day and was dehydrated.

I’m out of the headspace right now and really not feeling good, and now I remember exactly why I quit last time. Subdrop is a real thing, and it’s rough when it happens.

I’m going on no-touch for the rest of the evening, and possibly tomorrow too, we’ll see what happens. <3 thanks for all the support.

[junoquxxn1]

Now be a good girl and drink some water and turn off your phone and get some sleep. You can start climbing the hill again tomorrow.

You’re so sweet. I know I didn’t answer this ask yesterday but that’s really really sweet! <3 thank you for looking out for me.

[junoquxxn1]

You did really really well. 11 edges is hard. And good girl for taking care of yourself.

Thank you. <3 It was a lot.

[junoquxxn1]

Day 4

Part 5

I need to be honest. I lied.

I took a break for a little bit, let my head clear after that ruin. I was going to just start my edging over tomorrow with no consequence, but I need to come clean.

I knew what I was doing when I ruined earlier. I didn’t care about being good. I wanted to feel a ruin again. Yes, I iced it. But not enough to make it stop.

I lied and said it was an accident. It wasn’t.

See, this is why I need someone to be in charge. I should be punished not just for ruining, but for lying and saying it was an accident.

I need a disciplinarian, someone to report to and who I can give up control to. To make sure that when I do naughty things like this, there’s consequences. I could have been dishonest so easily…. And I almost did.

But I’m a big girl and I’m going to do my punishment as I’m supposed to. I’m going to edge 5 times. Make sure I’m nice and sensitive, and then toothpaste all over my clit and lips for 15 minutes until they’re sore and swollen.

My clit is so wet and sensitive after that little ruin. A ruin always wrecks my headspace for a little while. Makes all the horniness disappear, brings me back to reality. And then a few hours later, I go right back to being as wet as before.

I rubbed my slick little clit to edge 5 times. This time I made sure I pulled my hand away before I tipped over. Or I vowed I would double my punishment.

Then, I bent over the mirror so I’d have an excellent view and applied the toothpaste all over my clit, my pussy lips, everything. At first, it wasn’t so bad. A little cold. Then the burning started.

I laid there and closed my eyes and tried to focus on the burning and what I’d done wrong. I made sure to lay with my legs wide open so my clit was always on display. I made it not even five minutes before I started browsing my phone as a distraction.

The burning began to subside around the 10 minute mark, still throbbing and burning, but not nearly as bad as before. Then my timer went off, and I wiped all that toothpaste off with baby wipes… and the burning became ten times more intense.

I’m pretty sure I whimpered. Keeping my legs closed hurts now, but I’m laying here with them closed feeling the burning and the throbbing. It hurts.

If anyone would like some before and after pictures, please send me a message and ask, or ask for them below.

If you have some suggestions for punishments if I next have a lapse in judgement, please also let me know.

[junoquxxn1]

Day 4

Part 4

Things didn’t quite go to plan this time. Warning this is really long.

10 minutes in:

How has it only been 10 minutes I want to touch so bad and my nipples are so sensitive! I’ve been alternating between a clothespin on one while I rub and pinch the other, and then alternating every minute. It hurts…. But it feels good too.

20 minutes:

I’ve been humping the air without even the ghost of something against my clit. It’s so frustrating I want it so bad. My nipples are sore.

40 minutes in:

I got a little break because someone called me from upstairs. I went commando to answer them. But it didn’t take long for me to come right back. My nipples are clothespinned right now and it HURTS!

15 minutes left:

I’m so eager to touch, my clit needs it SO BAD, and I’m kind of nervous… but I think I’m going to add one more torture to myself tonight. It makes me so scared but also so wet to think about.

1 hour is over:

I rolled a pair of dice on random.org and got 11. Well. I rolled a 6 at first, but then I hit it a few more times and ended up with 11, so I think I kind of hurt myself.

So my very intense task for the rest of the night is:

1. Edge 11 times and ice my clit between edges.

3. After the final edge, I must apply toothpaste to my clit and pussy lips.

4. Now that I know how long it can be left safely, I must set a timer for 15 minutes and leave my legs spread wide.

5. For every time I move or squirm, I must spank my ass 5 times per cheek.

6. If I don’t reach 15 minutes before it is wiped off, I must spank my ass 10 times per minute missed.

7. With any luck, I will end the night with an extremely sore clit and an extremely sore bottom.

Edge 1

I tried to be as slow as I could but I was so needy. I ended up getting to the edge in about 5 minutes, which was really good considering how wet I was. I got so, so close, and then I rubbed the ice cube on my clit, taking it off for a moment when it started to hurt and then reapplying. It numbed everything right up, and I was able to touch again much longer.

Edge 2:

This time it took me a few minutes to get back to the edge. My fingers and clit were numb and freezing. But I was still so wet (and not from the melting either), and it didn’t take too long for me to warm right up again. I got right there, right to the very tippy tippy top of the edge and then… ice. Right there on my clit, rubbing all over it to cool it right down.

Edges 3-5: I did the same thing again. Right to the tippy tippy top of the edge, so close it would be so easy to tip over… and then ice, right on my tender little clit.

I’m glad I didn’t make not squirming during this part a requirement… I’ve been doing nothing but.

Edge 6: I added an ice cube up my pussy and one up my ass. It feels so good to be full of something and it’s dripping everywhere.

Edge 7: I made quite a mess of myself and my clit is really cold, so I made a decision. Im not going to ice my clit for the last 4. I’ll undergo 5 spankings for each icing I’ve missed, and in exchange, I’m going to put the remaining ice cubes up my ass and pussy and must wait until they melt to do the toothpaste.

Here’s where stuff goes wrong:

Edge 8-11: it was a mistake not doing the ice each time. I got really close on edge 11, since it was going to be my last one of the night. I saw a particularly hot post on tumblr and all of a sudden my clit did one big throb and I went over.

I iced it right away, but i couldn’t stop it and ended up with a little ruin. My head’s a little messed up after that, kind of coming out of that haziness now… I’m going to take a break for the rest of the evening. I don’t feel so good.

[junoquxxn1]

Day 4:

Part 3:

My friend has been staying the weekend which has made it really hard to edge. We were sitting together for hours, and I was getting more and more squirmy just waiting so I could start to edge again.

Finally, she left around dinner time, and I started driving to get myself something to eat, when a naughty idea occurred to me. I got very flushed trying to decide if I should do it or not, and finally, I pulled over into a parking lot with only a few other cars, and I slipped out of my panties and my pants, leaving everything bare. I put down the pants to sit on, but I was completely naked from the waist down, and I went through a drive thru.

The workers had no idea I was sitting there completely naked, dripping while they had no idea, and then I drove away feeling so satisfied.

After a quick dinner, I finally and eagerly ran to my room to lay down on my bed and get started, but I managed to hold back, though it was so, so hard.

Edging is a privilege, you know. Not a given. So I stripped down to nothing, and I began to make the bed, making sure to sexily bend over as much as possible…. Now I’m cold, but I’m really really eager.

And so since I’m so desperate to edge, I’ve decided to do something to torture myself even worse than before. It’s something that was suggested when I last did a challenge a few years ago, but it was so torturous I don’t think I managed to stick with it before: breast play only.

It’s 6:20 (EST) right now. For the next hour, I may not lay a hand below my waist. My breasts and nipples will receive the only stimulation. I have to cover up with a blanket both to keep myself from being tempted and also because I’m cold being completely naked, but my legs must be spread the whole time.

I am not allowed to touch my pussy until 7:20 (EST) and must browse tumblr/Reddit the whole time. Please feel free to send me some messages to make my torture worse.

[junoquxxn1]

You're being such a good girl. You should be really proud of yourself. Yes, reminders to drink water are super important. You can get phone apps for that. Highly recommend it. Keep up with the edging and the updates doll. You're doing great. It's so good to see you back.

Thank you very much, it’s good to be back! I really need to set reminders for water. Especially when my brain’s leaking out through my legs, can’t seem to drink enough of it!