Stops immediately. His eyes search yours with worry and gentle care as he moves to help you into a more comfortable position. After he immediately moving to get you some water, painkillers, run a bath to ease any aches. He literally does anything and everything he can think of to make things easy for you.
"shit baby, are you okay? did I hurt you?"
Lee Minho:
He freezes for a moment, holding his breath in slight panic. Afraid he's hurt you. He blinks once, then twice before his instincts kick in and he's moving to help you, asking what's wrong to try and fix whatever has happened.
"ive got you"
Seo Changbin:
His heart drops to his stomach. not literally but it definitely feel like it has. his skin pales and his hand shakes as he moves off you carefully. he feels awful in ways he can't even describe, immediately blaming himself for the use of your word.
"god I'm so sorry"
Hwang Hyunjin:
Quickly stops everything as his face falls at the thought of him hurting you or making you uncomfortable. Hands moving to massage and soothe you. he gets a wet cloth to help clean you up as he whispers soft apologetic words against your skin.
"let me help you baby, I'm sorry"
Han Jisung:
Anxiety consumes him at the way the words hit his ears and heart. Frozen above you as he looks down at you with wide eyes. His breathing turns ragged as the worst thoughts run through his mind before he shakes them away before jumping into action and aims to make you comfortable.
"F-Fuck... I didn't mean to.. I'm sorry"
Lee Felix:
His eyes water slightly as he worries. moves to soothe you and runs you a lie warm bubble bath which he joins you in to help wash and massage you. he whispers sweet nothings in your ear as he does so. He's like this for the rest of the night, soft, attentive and so apologetic even when you reassure him he didn't hurt you and you were just overwhelmed.
"let me take care of you"
Kim Sungmin:
His lips part in slight surprise, you've never said that word before and he doesn't really know how to respond. His body moves on his own as he just holds you close, kissing your hairline repeatedly. After he feels you relax he then moves to get you some water before asking questions to know what happened to avoid it from happening ever again.
"talk to me"
Yang Jeongin:
his heart stops. Gulping as his stomach swarms with anxious butterflies. He moves to help you get comfortable before asking what happened while to runs his fingers through your hair gently to soothe you.
| CW: pet names, new marriage, skinny dipping (kinda?), dom!felix, semi public sex, orgasm control, fingering, foreplay, choking, degredation, but also praise, breeding kink, unprotected pinv (nono), lix cums inside, mating press
| word count: 2,365
| synopsis: a roadtrip to your honeymoon location with your new husband!
| note: hopefully this makes up for my absence :))) not proofread
series masterlist
“Baby, please turn down the a/c I am freezing!” You whimper, your new husband chuckling deeply at your whininess. You curl up into the passenger seat, wrapping your blanket tighter around you. He reaches up and clicks the button. “Are we near the beach yet?”
“4-ish hours, sweetheart.” He takes your hand, bringing it up to his mouth, placing a small, sweet kiss on your cold skin. “There’s a cute little all-day breakfast cafe down the road. Wanna stop?”
“Ughhh. That’s so longgg, Lixie.” You whine, and he kisses your hand again. “Isn’t it a little late for breakfast?” You question, raising your eyebrow at him. He glances at you, smiling softly, his freckles and beautiful skin glowing under the sunlight.
“Never.” He states, putting his hand on your thigh, over the blanket. “Bet there’s lots of pancakes.”
“Ah, yes! You better stop! I want all the pancakes.” You giggle, grabbing at his hand excitedly. Pancakes are your favorite, as he knows.
“Was already planning on it, jagi.” He admits, grinning ear to ear. The silence that comes next is comfortable, and you beam with joy, thinking of the last 48 hours. The planning finally coming together, a day filled with joy and love, all of the most precious people in your lives’ coming together as one to celebrate. You begin to get emotional, your eyes welling with tears of happiness.
“I-I can’t believe you’re my husband.” You mutter. Felix takes a peek over at you as he pulls into the diner, noticing the single tear falling down your cheek. You squeeze his hand hard.
“Honey, why are you crying!?” His voice sounds concerned, but he chuckles at the same time, his cuteness aggression towards you making him smile.
“I’m just s-so happy, Lix. I love you so much.” You whimper, sniffling as one other tear falls. He pulls into a parking spot, putting the car into park and unbuckling his seatbelt. He leans towards you, taking your chin in his grasp, wiping the wetness from your cheeks. You move closer, connecting your lips. They move together like puzzle pieces, his warmth and taste filling your senses.
“I love you more, sweetheart. I will always love you.” He says after pulling away, caressing your hair, and you lean into his palm. “Now, let’s go eat our weight in pancakes.”
When you finally arrive at your destination, you both head straight to the beach first, rather than the small airbnb Felix had rented miles down the road. You squealed excitedly as he pulled the car up into the sand. It’s a private beach, so there’s not anyone out here, not as the sun lowers across the horizon.
“Let me park and get everything situated first, baby, damn!” He chuckles as you remove your shirt and shorts, throwing them in the backseat, revealing your white bikini already on underneath.
“Can’t! It’s right there, Lixie! I wanna go swimming.” You squeak, opening your car door as soon as it stops, Lix barely having time to put it in park. You take off, running just a few yards to reach the everchanging waves. “C’mon!!!” You shout back towards the car as your feet hit the water.
The water pulls you in like a magnet, and although the water is cold, you can’t seem to care. You dive forward, making sure not to go very far, knowing how dangerous the strong waves can be. When you emerge from the salty water, you turn your body back towards Felix, who’s setting up towels and blankets in the hatch of the car, lying down the back row of seats to make more room.
You stand there for a moment, wading in the ocean as he gets everything ready. The setting sun hitting his tanned skin, his blonde hair twisting in the wind. He looks too good to be true, and you think to yourself, how did you ever get this lucky? As you’re lost in thought, peacefully admiring your husband as you glide through the water, you notice he finally turns and heads towards you.
“Is it cold?” He questions, peeling his shirt off and tossing it in the sand. Your eyes glance at his toned stomach, ridges carved perfectly like a Greek statue. He dips his toes in the water and nearly shrieks at the temperature of the water.
“You’re so cute.” You begin, giggling at him. “It’s better once you’re in, c’monnnn.” You beg, grabbing his hand and slowly pulling him in, his face cringing from the cold. When he’s finally in, he dunks completely under the water abruptly, making your eyes go wide. When he appears from underneath, he shakes his head like a wet dog, water splashing onto you, then he slicks his hair back.
The two of you only realize the time once the sky is completely dark, other than the stars that scatter the open void. You’d been talking for a while, about random little things, your bodies slowly inching closer and closer to where you are now, legs wrapped around his waist. A sudden heat grows inside of you, his deep voice echoing around you as you hold him tighter. He’s talking, telling a story about the guys, but now, you’re not listening. You try, you really try, but the droplets of water slipping off his smooth skin, and the way your eyes trace the veins down his arms to his hands has you distracted. You glance at his stiff chest between your bodies, and trace the outline of his pecs with your fingers as he finishes his story.
“I’m getting a little cold, think you can warm me up?” You grin mischievously as you reach behind you, pulling the strings of your bikini top. You catch it as it falls, throwing it into the sand beside Felix’s shirt. The night breeze hits your nipples, that, along with your sudden neediness, makes them hard as a rock as you press your breasts against his warm skin.
“Baby. wh-what are you doing?” A look of confusion displays across his face, but there’s a hint of curiosity in his eyes as his pupils enlarge, eyes glued to the look of you bare against him.
“Just wanna be closer to you Lixie.” You start, reaching down and underneath the water to release the ties on the sides of your bottoms as well. You untie them both, then reach between your legs to pull the fabric out from under you, tossing it aside, too. His limbs stiffen, his adam's apple bobbing as he swallows hungrily. Your cunt is positioned against his lower abdomen, brushing against his abs.
“What’s the matter, jagiya?” You whisper, leaning closer towards his ear. You nip at his earlobe, a deep groan escaping him as you bite down on the sweet spot that always drives him crazy.
“Baby.” He says roughly, through gritted teeth, like a warning, his entire arua flipping like a switch. You lean back, smirking at him, sliding your hips down just a bit. You feel his hard cock through his shorts, pressing against the bottom of your pussy and you grind. He doesn’t let you mess around for long before he’s picking you up, trudging through and out of the water. You squeal as he carries you back to the car, sitting you in the back of the car that he had opened and laid blankets down on. He climbs over top of you, his head situating just to the right of yours.
“You know I love you right?” Lix questions, his hands roaming you as the water saturates the blanket underneath. Your face flushes red, wondering where he’s going with this. You nod slightly, breathing heavily as his fingers trail around your sensitive skin.
“Good. Because I’m gonna fuck you like I don’t.” He growls, crashing your lips together with great force. He doesn’t waist any time, his left hand gripping your tit, right hand snaking down to your cunt. His middle finger slides through your folds, gathering your arousal at your entrance and dragging it up to your clit. You whimper as his strong fingers begin to rub circles around it, the sensitive bundle of nerves sending jolts of pleasure throughout your core. He nips at any of your skin he can reach, your ear, your neck, your tits, all of it.
“Already so wet for me, baby. Kinda pathetic.” He grins, his gravely voice sending chills down your spine, the condescending tone only making your need thrive.
“Lix.” You breathe heavily, feeling the familiar knot begin to build inside of you. He breathes in your moans, his mouth ghosting just about yours now. Suddenly, the two fingers he was using to toy with your bud plunge deeper, entering you with ease. You take in a gasp, back arching off the blanket. His fingers curl inside of you, finding your gspot quickly. He knows he’s found it when you suck in a deep breath, and he returns his thumb back to your throbbing clit.
“You wanna act like a whore out there right in the open, for anyone to see, then I’ll treat you like one sweetheart.” He chuckles low, his free hand traveling up to grip around your neck. A bolt of electricity flows through you as soon as his hand is secure and he adds pressure to the sides.
“Anyone could’ve walked out onto that beach and seen my wife…naked. My. Wife.” He spits at you, tightening his grip around your neck. You’re about to fall apart, so close to the edge your legs are shaking.
“Lix, I-m’gonna cum.” You creak out, voice quiet due to his strong hand against your throat, and his fingers continue working you open, legs falling slack to the side.
“Ask me.” He demands, and you raise an eyebrow, not knowing what he means, your mind clouded with pleasure and the need to orgasm, but when his fingers stop abruptly, he has your attention.
“N-No, Lixie please. A-Ask you what?” You stutter, his fingers starting again now that your eyes are on his, and just like that, the peak is near just like before. He rolls his eyes before answering.
“Ask for permission, baby. I control when and where you fall apart.” He whispers into your ear, the warmth of his breath nearly causing you to lose it.
“Please, please, Lix.” You plead, legs trying to force themselves back up around him. His hand removes from your neck, shoving your legs back down against the blanket.
“Keep your legs spread open or you won’t cum at all.” He mocks you, pretending to think for a moment before taking your pleas into consideration, his fingers moving fast and consistent. You’re not sure how you’ve even held your orgasm off this long. “I don’t know if I should let you, baby. Such a naughty little thing you were out there.”
Tears prick your eyes, trying so hard to be good and obedient so you can be rewarded with what you want. He tsks at you, an evil grin plastered on his face. You move your hips up against his hand unknowingly, so desperate and drunk from his touch. He pulls his swimming shorts down with his free hand, and the one pleasuring you stops completely and withdrawals from you. His hard cock is at your entrance and plummeting inside of you before you can even process the change. You yelp, his long cock stretching you and diving deep into you, making the wetness that gathered in your eyes to fall.
“Awh, look at you, sweetheart. Cryin on your husband's cock, huh?” He taunts, his hands gripping the underside of your thighs, pushing them forward into a mating press, your legs touching your stomach, rolling your hips forward, making his length explore you deeper than ever.
“Lix, c-can I cum, please?” You moan, words catching in your throat from your overwhelming desire. He smirks, as you follow his directions.
“Such a good girl, cum all over me, baby. Soak me.” He groans, causing you to finally snap. Your body convulses underneath him, legs stiff and shaking as he continues to fuck you slow and deep, his curved dick sliding against your sweet spot with every thrust. You gasp, breathing heavy as you come down from your high. When he notices you’re grounded, he begins to speed up the pace of his thrusts, his fingers digging into the back of your thighs as he holds them down.
“F-Faster.” You whine, following it up with a very small please. He obliges, the constant stimulation to your gspot overstimulating you in the best way. You’re surprised how quickly a second orgasm begins to build.
“Gonna fill you up so good, baby. Gonna breed this pussy, mark it as mine forever.” He breathes out, jaw tight as he gets close as well. He’s deeper inside of you than he’s ever been before, the tip of his cock bulging out of the skin of your lower abdomen, tickling your cervix. “Gna paint your insides with my cum, so deep inside of you I hope it takes. Make me a part of you forever.”
The strength behind his hips as he pummels into you takes your breath away with each thrust. Your hands grip at his back, nails dragging, sure to leave marks tomorrow. Your cunt clenches around him as you cum again, head falling back in bliss. The pulsating of your pussy around him sends him over the edge, too. He thrusts back deep inside of you one last time, his hot seed shooting so far inside of you that you think maybe he really does want that. As you both calm down, swallowing each other in kisses, he stays buried inside of you, neither of you wanting to move. After a few moments, you break the comfortable silence.
“Now what??” You giggle, swiping the hair out of his face as his eyes find yours.
Question!! Can we get serial killer skz headcanons? Idk what that means but tbh the fan fic was so good it should be saved into a museum ><
DEAR Y/N: HEADCANONS!!
contents: headcanons from the dear y/n universe(which i assume u meant by saying THE fan fic, this ask was sent a long time ago like maybe when the first part came out >⩊<), a little bit of everything so all warnings that have been on the dear y/n parts so far are playing here, take all of those in mind plus underage virginity loss mentioned, and these are not tied to a specific timeline in the fic so wherever you are in the fic there will be boyfriend headcanons of all boys.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan NEVER loses a staring contest. like, obviously because people get uncomfortable after a while, but what about the other boys who, as we know, don’t get uncomfortable that easily? well once jeongin said “watch this.” twenty three minutes later: “alright man this isn’t even funny anymore.” and chan blinked for the first time.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ seungmin is in his head lots, actually. doesn’t even notice when in an environment where he doesn’t have to act(so like around you or the boys), he’ll be left by himself and randomly mutter “yeah well fuck you too.” just into the air. you love him the same for it.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ minho is ALWAYS aware of where everyone is. like ask him where felix is(felix is used as the example because he’s unpredictable) and minho knows.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ jeongin has tried flirting with all seven of the boys “just to see.” the results, han giggled, chan ignored him, seungmin threatened him, changbin patted his shoulder and left him there, minho stared until jeongin backed off, felix said yes, hyunjin told him to shut the fuck up.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin never felt protective before you, only once, over a kitten he found on the street.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ if annoyed enough, chan could absolutely carry all of them at the same time. if the situation gives it!! he doesn’t know this, the others do.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ once han felt maternal for hyunjin sleeping so he pet hyunjin and hyunjin woke up and fast as lightning bit han’s arm. han screamed.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ han also has rich laugh in this universe, just like in our real one.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ when your only boyfriends were chan, changbin, seungmin and han(writing this currently as they’re the only boyfriends but fuck knows when will anyone read this, could be by the time the series is finished), you kissed all of them goodbye, like had them in a kinda line, and felix stood at the end of it, trying to sneak in. didn’t get a kiss, just seungmin jumping at him and strangling him while hyunjin was slapping his knee laughing :(
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ minho has appeared behind people so many times that nobody even screams anymore, it’s just “hey minho.” “hello.” now.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ seungmin hated cuddling before you.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ he’s also terrifyingly jealous of strangers who you interact with.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin’s sad little head tells him weird things to do, once he slept on the floor next to the empty couch. he doesn’t second guess what his gut tells him to do.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ anyone who gets into changbin’s car trusts him with their fucking life and they’re so right for it. that man drives so good.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ now that we’re at driving, when seungmin is alone in the car, he talks back to the gps, he entertains himself so good, he’s just a boy :( “turn left.” “shut the fuck up.” he says as he turns left. “recalculating.”“yeah, recalculate these nuts.”
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ minho sleeps so still, flat on his back and all, that felix checked for a pulse once. minho opened one eye, felix shouted in fear.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ minho also once got scared in his life and it was when he scared himself in the mirror.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ han’s favorite shape is a circle.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ changbin watches you do the fucking less, shit like put your glass down while you’re manspreading like a fucking pig and with the proudest smile on his face he thinks “god she’s unbelievable.” changbin loves his girfriend.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin always has enough cash.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ before you jeongin got slapped by a woman at least once every week, now he only gets slapped by you every other week and sometimes, but significantly less, still by random other women.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin is the biggest beer enthusiast.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ grabbing han by the scruff like how we grab cats by the scruff works. like, he goes limp like a cat.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan has caught seungmin trying to secretly look prettier before seeing you. “what are you doing?” “nothing. mind your fucking business.” he’s all up in the mirror while saying that to chan.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ minho’s favorite utensils are spoons.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin saying he’ll only have one drink has been a statement never true.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ han thinks all horses are girls. someone asks “what about stallions?” and he says “those are boyfriend horses :)” to him horses are girly, in the good way. he likes women.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan started saying “for fuck’s sake” way more since meeting you, not because of you but because of how the boys started acting after you, atp his blood pressure has developed its own blood pressure.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ changbin is like the grilling final boss.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ you trained it into han so hard that sometimes he says “love you” when hanging up on pizza places.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ none of them genuinely missed anything before meeting you.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan figured out he loved you first.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ he also sleeps really lightly, even if alone, even if with you, that’s an instinct that will never be shaken out of him.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ you make han fall asleep in a minute, any way you do it. from reading to him to just having a hand in his hair or on his back or butt or any body part, you’re there and baby’s asleep.(a fucking horrible man)
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ none of them had childhood dreams, when people ask “what did you want to be growing up?” they don’t have answers, they never imagined a future. you accidentally gave them one.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ once hyunjin had a mosquito on him. he stabbed the mosquito with a syringe. he also stabbed himself with it in the process and got some of the poison in his bloodstream, but the mosquito was dead and that’s what matters. changbin found hyunjin passed out.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ they never experience nostalgia. deja vu yeah time to time, but never nostalgia.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ changbin once wanted to be so close to you that he lifted the end of your shirt and like climbed in basically, so both of you wore the shirt at the same time, chest to chest. it was great, also fucking inconvenient because you had shit to do and he didn’t want to let you go.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ jeongin has not once in his life been 100% honest.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin’s handyman work is actually impressive, like better than you’d imagine changbin’s or chan’s or minho’s is.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ they’ve always trusted each other with their lives. trusting each other with feelings was infinitely harder, but that came around slowly too after they started developing them for you. unconsciously realized that saying it out loud helps.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ felix is the only thing that can scare hyunjin absolutely. like yeah minho can give him little creeps from time to time but then hyunjin walks into a room, turns the light on and felix is already in there, hyunjin fucking drops a whole ass bottle from how scared he got. something in felix brings that out.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ they all can have a creepy presence, actually do have it most time.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ you have become everyone’s answer to everything, they trust your judgment and ideas and woman instincts more than anything. “where’s my shirt?” “ask y/n.” “i think i have internal bleeding.” “tell her.” “i saw a weird bug.” “she’ll know.”
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ they don’t understand how women’s mind work, that’s why it’s harder getting you, but it was always hard, even when seeing into their victims’ minds they worked better with killing men than women, because men were, naturally, more predictable to them.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin has dad reflexes. cup falls, catches it. knife falls, catches it. han falls, lets him.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ changbin loves grocery shopping.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ thunderstorms absolutely reset minho, he prefers them over anything. (but you, not over you, of course)
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ once changbin spent three days not meeting you(obviously wanted to more than anything but hiding the bodies and running his business at the same time is not easy shit) and he was actually nauseous from missing you and longing for you. just clung to you when finally got to you too.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ felix drinks all soup. like hold the bowl chug it.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ they never can keep their shirts on when it’s even a little bit warm in the room.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan, to get a kill or hide or framing done, can eat everything he doesn’t like, say anything he doesn’t actually agree with, act the arch opposite of himself without any problem, but if he’s forced to drink coffee he will gag that back. that shit will never go down his throat.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin always closes his eyes when you hug him.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ if chan says “don’t touch that” they immediately want to touch that. all of them.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ seungmin and han have raced to the front door because you said “first one gets a kiss.” seungmin only won because he stopped to choke han until han passed out.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan is impossible to prank, he notices everything always.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ if felix looks at an animal enough, he picks a trait up. like, unconsciously. he shook like a peacock once. stood like a flamingo. saw you pet a cat and purred too.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ seungmin was once thinking in bed before falling asleep, thought about you saying you’re disappointed in him(never happened yet) and it affected him so much and so sudden that he sat up leaned to the side and threw up. just from that, just like that.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ the gnab version of chan also exists here but only around you.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin only has fantasies about you. we’re not even talking just sexual fantasies, something as simple as the thought of you calling his name from another room is enough to make his heart drop and his tummy flip.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ jeongin lost his virginity at 16.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ seungmin always eats off your plate.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan has to kill anytime anyone touches his stuff, except you.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ changbin loves pda in public, like yes he has a gf and he will show that off.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ each boy’s biggest weakness is you.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin and seungmin like cute things.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ nobody knows who taught han how to drive, there is an ongoing theory that nobody actually did.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ minho jerks off with his head tilted back.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ han LOVES those claw machines, even won a few times, actually!
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ seungmin can’t handle losing. losing in any sense, from rock paper scissors to hunting someone with the boys and one of the others get to the victim first, he’ll absolutely start destroying shit.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan still folds the laundry the exact way his mom taught him, didn’t change anything about the method.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ changbin likes having his nipples sucked on, and like played with in general.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan is the typa guy who you mention something you liked from the shop, for an example juice, and he buys like twenty of it the next day.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin writes, small things like little poetry. (though maybe this was mentioned already???)
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ seungmin has a knife he calls princess.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ they all think that if they don’t move, they can get out of under responsibilities.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin grew up in a smaller town. like i mean that tells a lot about his personality already.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ horses also like hyunjin
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ seungmin is the most aware of his balls. like that they’re there between his legs, most aware of them.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ when hyunjin goes into a room, sees something he doesn’t like, like a fucking DAD he goes “who left this here” and nobody has the bravery to answer.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ changbin had a minipig at home once, but gave it to a guy he knew later, the pig ate too many human remains and changbin couldn’t stay home with him enough :( he liked the pig.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ felix had a cat when he was a teenager. no, nothing happened to the cat, is still well and alive, just at his parents’
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ let’s consider please that they’re not hairless in this universe because obviously there’s no company that requires them to be. from lil stubbles sometimes to chest hair, like hyunjin specifically has a little chest hair, chan’s arm is so perfectly hairy, whatnot.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ changbin once won a piano competition, the trophy is still somewhere in a box, he hasn’t touched a piano since he was eighteen.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ not that hyunjin’s dad was absent, but not around a lot.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ they think it’s cute how you like their smells.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ felix can’t remember huge parts of his teenager years.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ changbin can and will break a person’s bone with one hand twist.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ jeongin is usually the distraction. felix is the sacrifice.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ like it literally happened once that they were planning a kill and when someone said something like “okay we need someone to be the bait” and like in cartoons they all shut up and slowly looked at felix(they’re FUCKING hilarious). or they just. throw him there when something goes wrong. they know he’ll survive anyway.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan’s favorite spot to hurt on a human is neck. any part of it, from front to side to back, it’s his fav.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ minho gets hard when he watches you sleep, you’ve woken up to him just staring at you with his hand down his pants more than once.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ when felix gets random boners, instead of making a move to initiate something sexual with you, he just looks at you with those big empty eyes like “help :)” until you notice him.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ han’s favorite way of killing is just tackling people and stabbing wildly until they stop moving.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin is like the fingering final boss.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ when a victim starts begging, jeongin just looks away, waits it out because it’s just so boring.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ one of changbin’s best memories is when he was driving and you fell asleep in the passenger seat for the first time since he knew you. he felt like a good man there, and being good doesn’t matter to them, that’s why it’s so significant. like aw he tried to kill you but you feel this safe
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ you’re not aware of this but you know each of them by their smells, you could recognize them from it instantly.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ jeongin and minho’s cats get along.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan loves the knowledge of, the feeling of life leaving under his hands. that gets him going more than anything.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ felix has exactly one freckle right in the middle of his right asscheek.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ changbin can coo to, sweet talk someone he’s killing the same way he sweet talks you when fucking you. he did it before getting to know you, so it’s a habit that bled onto you, not from you.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ han is really impulsive, if chan and the others didn’t exist, he would have been caught years ago. like love quinn type of impulsive. but! despite being impulsive, he never ever leaves the others behind, if someone’s still back at a victim fucking around, han IS with him.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ following victims so much, they developed a patience unbelievably brutal. like could sit for half a day in place without doing anything.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ jeongin is a talker anywhere else, but barely speaks during anything sexual. only when someone talks to him first, he’s too in the feeling to form the thought of speaking.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ they love eating after a kill.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ felix gets hard from killing. not the eating the victim part exactly, but when he takes a life with like a knife or just in any way general, point is takes a life, instant boner.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ leave lipstick marks on han’s dick please.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ you’re, obviously, not the only one they had done this chase and kill with, but the only one that survived.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ minho sometimes checks your pulse during sex. creepy little asshole. oh now that we’re at assholes, he loves anal stuff too.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ they check on you lots randomly. like just come into the room, see you’re fine, leave.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ they can’t apologize in words.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin likes to sit back and watch someone’s blood spray.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan, hyunjin and changbin are the professional bring you anything you ask for under a SECOND. like the others do what you ask too but they take a while to, they’re men, but chan, changbin and hyunjin immediately get tf up and get it for you.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ seungmin loves shopping with you.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ before knowing you they once just got a pacifier for felix and shoved it in his mouth whenever he wasn’t behaving. but he got addicted so they took it away from him :(
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ changbin once broke every finger on both hands of a guy who touched your waist at a party (before you were dating). he did it one by one in the parking garage while the guy screamed, then he drove the guy to the hospital and dropped him off with a “get well soon.” why didn’t he kill him, you’d ask, because leaving them alive is making a joke of them, to the boys.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ felix sometimes stands in the corner by himself when scolded. like, nobody told him to. he just went.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ han is surprisingly sufficient when killing with his forehead???
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ you have a tiny, almost shy habit of saying “thank you” after a really good orgasm. they all just want to eat you up when you do that, you’re so cute.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ seungmin once made a guy dig his own grave while bleeding out from a dozen little cuts, everytime the guy slowed down seungmin would cut him again and say “faster, bitch.” when the guy finally collapsed seungmin just kicked him into the hole and filled it himself, whistling around.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ they’re all ear licker freaks.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ seungmin is embarrassingly loud in bed.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ minho becomes your bitch when given physical touch to. cuddle with him and you can fold him in any direction, he’ll obey anything.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ “don’t look behind you” never works on them, they immediately look.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ they, obviously, always call changbin to physically move things. car stuck? changbin. body too heavy? changbin. someone fell into a ditch? changbin. han climbed somewhere stupid again? …changbin.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin’s favorite hiding spot is simply… behind a tree.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ jeongin goes cross eyed when he has an orgasm.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan has the right to take weapons away from the others. “give me the knife.” “…” “jeongin.” “…” “yang jeongin.” “…fine.” “and the other one.” like a little brat, jeongin slaps multiple weapons into chan’s hand.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ despite being built like a skinny little bitch, felix does surprisingly well with the full nelson sex position.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ every single one of them has used the phrase “this is why we can’t have nice things.”
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ minho is the master of hiding. from under something to in an empty bathtub, he never gets found.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan has punched through exactly six doors.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin and felix grew up totally religious, hyunjin grew out of it, felix didn’t.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ when there’s a baby where they’re killing someone, one of them is always with the baby. not because morality, it’s just fun. bouncing the baby around, rocking them, patting their little back, usually jeongin or hyunjin, talking to the baby in a separate room. just again, not separate room because morality, they just want alone time with the baby. they like babies, all of them do except seungmin.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ yeah seungmin is not a fan of kids. they irritate him, actually.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ lot of murders ended with felix hanging upside down from somewhere, for some reason.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ and at one minho left halfway through to get ice cream. for himself. didn’t know you back then but if he did he would’ve brought you some back.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ changbin owns a pocketpussy, so does hyunjin, reminder they live together, neither knows that the other has one.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ seungmin’s sneakiness, quiet level depends entirely on his mood. good mood? ninja. bad mood? “fuck this.” and kicks door open
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ they usually ask you to settle every debate.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ every time they split into pairs, everyone silently prays they don’t get assigned han. only minho is okay with it, he’s the only one who doesn’t have to rip his hair out from how dumb han is. like, they all like the guy, sure, but working with him is hard.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan is the only one who can watch you have sex with the others and actually resist joining in.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ minho can escape handcuffs, besides escaping from situations, he also uses that skill to scare you during sex. like, sweetly scare, of course, he doesn’t want to actually scare you. (always succeeds though)
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ they tried earpieces to work better together once, within seven minutes jeongin was singing, han was loudly making out with you, and felix swallowed his.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ chan has never had a phone case.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hyunjin can untangle anything, once you and changbin went to him to untangle the ropes changbin got for sex later, hyunjin was done with it in five minutes, watched you two have sex later. joined but got tied up next to changbin, yes changbin was the one tied up. and well, hyunjin too then, he didn’t untangle that one though, that he liked.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ dogs love jeongin and han. jeongin always matches their energy, han is just in awe and adores the dog.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ minho hates balloons.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ felix is really attracted to your neck but not aware of it. hyunjin also has a thing for it but he’s very aware of it.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ before knowing you, there was a kill when all of them almost died. it was early on before they really knew how to work together and decided to attack a bigger group, what even was their thought process here???, han got stabbed in the side almost fucking immediately, dipshit, jeongin took a bullet to the shoulder, seungmin got his leg slashed defending han, chan had three broken ribs, hyunjin got hit in the face so hard he could barely get up, minho took a knife to the gut, felix got shot in the arm (and still tried to eat someone’s face). changbin was the one who fucking saved them last second with a fucking pipe. han passed out from blood loss, chan held pressure to minho’s wound, the others laid around and accepted defeat. but changbin got the shit together in the last second!!
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ after knowing you, they would never be that reckless again.
author’s note: was i deep and mysterious with the last line.
TW: Emotional betrayal, Jealousy and possessive behavior, Alcohol use, Anxiety and panic attacks, Relationship dissolution and heartbreak, Toxic relationship dynamics, Depression and emotional numbness, Implied sexual content
Synopsis: Three people fall into something beautiful…a secret that feels like salvation until the walls close in. What begins as stolen moments and whispered confessions becomes a suffocating cage of fear, jealousy, and impossible choices. When the weight of keeping them safe becomes heavier than the love holding them together, everything shatters, leaving only silence.
AN: hello! I hope everyone is doing okay! This one is just a one shot. Reading it over..it’s not as good as some of my other stuff, but I am a bit rusty. I haven’t written much lately.
The apartment smelled like soju and laughter filled the room, the kind that came too easily after midnight when inhibitions had been drowned in cheap alcohol and expensive regrets. Y/n kicked off her shoes by the door, stumbling slightly as Hyunjin caught her elbow, his touch lingering a second longer than necessary. Felix followed behind them, quieter than usual, his eyes tracking the way Hyunjin's hand slid down to Y/n's waist, the casual intimacy of two years together making the gesture automatic.
"I'm making ramen," Y/n announced, padding toward the kitchen in her socks, and Hyunjin watched her go with that look he got sometimes—like he was memorizing her. Felix had seen that look before, had felt the weight of Hyunjin's attention when it turned on him during practice, during late-night conversations, during moments when the space between them felt charged with something neither of them had words for.
The kitchen was small, minimalist like everything else in Hyunjin's apartment. Y/n moved through the space like she belonged there, pulling out pots and ingredients while humming something off-key, and Felix found himself watching her the way Hyunjin did…taking the curve of her neck, the way her hair fell across her shoulders, the easy grace in her movements.
"You're staring," Hyunjin said, his voice low and amused, and Felix jerked his gaze away, heat crawling up his neck.
"Sorry, I—"
"Don't be." Hyunjin moved closer, close enough that Felix could smell his cologne mixed with alcohol and something uniquely him. "She's beautiful. It's okay to look."
The words hung in the air between them, heavy with implication, and Felix's heart kicked against his ribs because this wasn't the first time. There had been other moments—Hyunjin's hand on his shoulder lasting too long, Y/n's laugh when Felix made her smile, the three of them on this couch watching movies with the space between their bodies shrinking incrementally until they were pressed together, warm and comfortable and something more than just friends.
Y/n appeared with three bowls of ramen, steam rising in the dim light, and they ate sitting on the floor around the coffee table. The conversation flowed easy, punctuated by laughter and comfortable silences. Y/n's foot brushed against Felix's under the the table and she didn't move it away. Hyunjin's hand found her thigh, his thumb tracing absent patterns on her jeans, and Felix watched the gesture with something that felt like longing, like hunger, like want he'd been pushing down for months.
"I'm glad you're here," Y/n said suddenly, looking at Felix with those dark eyes that always seemed to see too much. "Both of you. This feels... right."
The word settled over them like a blanket, warm and suffocating all at once. Felix's throat felt tight. Hyunjin's hand stilled on Y/n's leg. The apartment was quiet except for the hum of the refrigerator and the distant sound of traffic outside.
"Yeah," Felix managed, his voice rougher than he intended. "It does."
Y/n leaned forward, her hand reaching across the table to cover Felix's, and the touch sent electricity up his arm. Hyunjin was watching them both with that intense focus he brought to everything he cared about, his eyes dark and unreadable in the low light.
"Felix," Hyunjin said, and there was something in his voice that made Felix's pulse spike. "Come here."
It wasn't a request. Felix stood on unsteady legs and moved around the table. Hyunjin pulled him down onto the couch, Y/n following, and suddenly Felix was between them, Hyunjin's hand on his knee and Y/n's shoulder pressed against his, and he couldn't breathe, couldn't think, could only feel the heat of them on either side of him.
"Is this okay?" Y/n asked, her voice soft, and Felix realized her hand was on his chest, could feel his heart hammering beneath her palm. "Tell us if it's not okay."
"It's okay," Felix said, and the words came out like a confession. "It's more than okay."
Hyunjin's hand moved higher on his thigh and Y/n's lips found his neck, soft and warm, and Felix made a sound he didn't recognize, something desperate and needy that seemed to break whatever restraint they'd all been clinging to. Hyunjin kissed him then, deep and searching, tasting like alcohol and need. Felix kissed back like he was drowning, like Hyunjin was air.
They moved to the bedroom in a tangle of limbs and breathless laughter, stumbling through the doorway. The room was dark except for the city lights filtering through the curtains, casting everything in shades of blue and shadow. Y/n pulled her shirt over her head and Felix's breath caught at the sight of her. Hyunjin was behind him, hands sliding under Felix's shirt, lips on his shoulder, and Felix was overwhelmed by the sensation of being touched by both of them, wanted by both of them.
"You're so handsome," Y/n whispered, her hands on his face, and she kissed him soft and slow while Hyunjin worked his shirt off, his hands mapping Felix's skin like he was creating art from the planes of Felix's body.
They moved together with a tenderness that surprised him, all gentle touches and whispered questions—is this okay, do you want this, tell me what you need—and Felix found himself answering with his body, with his hands, with the way he pulled them both closer. Y/n's skin was soft under his fingers and Hyunjin's was warm against his back. They just fit together in ways that felt inevitable, like this was always meant to happen.
The intimacy built slowly, a crescendo of sensation and emotion that left Felix shaking, left all of them breathless and tangled together in sheets that smelled like sweat and sex and something deeper, something that felt like belonging. Y/n's head was on his chest and Hyunjin's arm was around both of them, and Felix could feel their heartbeats syncing, could feel the rise and fall of their breathing.
"Stay," Hyunjin whispered into the darkness, and Felix wasn't going anywhere, couldn't imagine being anywhere else but here, between these two people who'd just shown him what it felt like to be completely, utterly wanted.
They fell asleep like that, three bodies pressed together in a bed meant for two, and Felix's last thought before sleep claimed him was that this felt like home, like safety, like something worth protecting.
Morning came soft and golden, light filtering through the curtains in gentle waves. Felix woke first, disoriented for a moment before memory crashed back. Y/n's breath on his neck, Hyunjin's arm heavy across his waist, the three of them tangled together. His heart should have been racing with panic, but instead he felt calm, settled, like something fundamental had clicked into place.
Y/n stirred against him, her eyes fluttering open, and for a second Felix saw fear flash across her face before it melted into something softer. "Hi," she whispered, her voice rough with sleep.
"Hi," he whispered back, and then Hyunjin was waking up too, his arm tightening around both of them before he seemed to remember where he was. Felix waited for the regret, for the awkward scramble to put distance between them, but Hyunjin just pressed his face into Felix's shoulder and made a contented sound.
"Coffee," Hyunjin mumbled, and Y/n laughed, the sound bright and easy, and just like that the tension broke.
They untangled themselves slowly, reluctantly. Felix pulled on his boxers and Hyunjin's shirt while Y/n stole one of Hyunjin's hoodies. The apartment looked different in daylight—softer somehow, more real. Hyunjin started the coffee maker while Y/n pulled ingredients from the fridge.
"Pancakes?" she asked, looking at Felix, and he nodded because his throat felt too tight to speak.
They moved around each other with surprising ease, Y/n at the stove while Hyunjin set the table and Felix poured coffee into three mismatched mugs. Sunlight streamed through the windows, catching on Hyunjin's hair and making Y/n's skin glow.
"You're doing it again," Hyunjin said, amused, and Felix realized he'd been staring.
"This is nice," Felix said quietly. "This feels nice."
Y/n turned from the stove, spatula in hand, and her smile was soft, genuine. "It does, doesn't it? I was worried it would be weird this morning. That we'd all panic and pretend it didn't happen."
"Do you want to pretend it didn't happen?" Hyunjin asked, and there was something vulnerable in his voice.
"No," Y/n said immediately. "God, no. Do you?"
"No." Hyunjin looked at Felix then, his eyes searching. "Felix?"
Felix thought about lying, about protecting himself, about all the reasons this was a terrible idea—the company, the contracts, the careful image they had to maintain. But looking at them in the morning light, at the hope on their faces, Felix couldn't bring himself to lie.
"No," he said quietly. "I don't want to pretend."
The relief on their faces was palpable. Hyunjin moved closer to Felix, his hand finding Felix's and squeezing gently. "Okay," Hyunjin said, and the word felt like a promise. "Okay."
They ate breakfast at the small table, knees bumping underneath, passing syrup and butter and stealing bites from each other's plates. It was mundane and perfect and Felix felt something in his chest expand, something that felt like hope.
"What are you doing today?" Y/n asked, looking at Hyunjin.
"We have practice at two. Nothing before that." He glanced at Felix.
Felix hesitated. "I should probably go home, shower, change…"
"Or you could stay," Y/n interrupted, and there was something tentative in her voice. "We could... I don't know. Watch a movie. Just hang out. If you want."
Felix looked at Hyunjin, who was watching him with that intense focus again, and Felix knew what he was really being asked. Stay. Be part of this. Let this be more than just one drunken night.
"Yeah," he said, and his voice was steady even though his heart was racing. "I'd like that."
Y/n's smile was radiant, and Hyunjin's hand found his under the table again. Felix thought that maybe, just maybe, this could work.
He should have known better.
Six months felt like a lifetime and no time at all. Felix learned the geography of Y/n's apartment, learned that she took her coffee with too much sugar and sang off-key in the shower. He learned new things about Hyunjin too—the way he painted when he couldn't sleep, covering canvases in dark colors and abstract shapes. The way he looked at Felix during practice now, quick glances that felt like touches, like secrets they were keeping from the rest of the world.
Because it was a secret. It had to be. The company had strict rules not just on dating but same sex dating and even stricter rules about image and reputation. Felix knew what happened to idols who got caught in scandals like this. The public humiliation, the contract terminations, the way careers could implode overnight. So they were careful. They met at Y/n's apartment. They didn't touch in public. They kept their messages vague, coded.
But in private, in the safety of locked doors and drawn curtains, they were something else entirely. Felix would show up after practice and find Y/n cooking dinner while Hyunjin read on the couch, and they'd eat together on the floor like they had that first night. Sometimes they'd watch movies, Y/n curled between them on the couch. Sometimes they'd end up in bed, learning each other with the same careful tenderness as that first night.
Felix fell in love slowly, inevitably. He fell in love with the way Y/n laughed at his jokes, the way she listened when he talked about his fears. He fell in love with Hyunjin's intensity, the way he loved with his whole being. He fell in love with both of them, separately and together, and it terrified him how much he needed this.
But there were moments—small at first, barely noticeable—when something darker crept in. Felix would make Y/n laugh, really laugh, the kind that made her throw her head back and clutch her stomach, and he'd catch Hyunjin watching them with an expression he couldn't quite read. Not quite jealousy. Not quite hurt. Something in between that made Felix's chest tighten with guilt he didn't understand.
And Felix noticed other things too. The way Hyunjin touched Y/n. His fingers would trace the curve of her jaw with such reverence, such possession, that Felix felt like an intruder watching something too intimate. Hyunjin would pull Y/n into his lap during movies, his arms wrapped around her waist, and Felix would sit beside them feeling the distance even when their knees touched.
Neither of them said anything. They pretended not to notice the small territorial gestures, the way they both reached for Y/n's hand at the same time and had to laugh it off. The way Hyunjin's jaw would tighten when Felix whispered something in Y/n's ear that made her smile. The way Felix's stomach would twist when he walked in to find Hyunjin and Y/n already tangled together on the couch, so wrapped up in each other they didn't hear him come in.
"I love you," Y/n said one night, her head on Felix's chest, Hyunjin's arm around both of them. "Both of you. I love both of you."
Felix's throat felt tight. Hyunjin's arm tightened around them. "I love you too," Hyunjin said quietly.
Felix knew this was the moment he could pull back, could protect himself. But he'd never been good at self-preservation when it came to people he cared about.
"I love you," he whispered, and the words felt like jumping off a cliff as his eyes found Y/n’s in the dim bedroom.
Y/n kissed him then, soft and sweet, and Hyunjin kissed her shoulder, and Felix felt something in his chest crack open. But even as he held them both, even as he breathed in the moment, he couldn't shake the feeling that loving them both meant constantly sharing, constantly dividing himself, constantly wondering if he was enough.
The first real crack appeared on a Tuesday, but it wasn't paparazzi or management that caused it.
Felix had shown up at Y/n's apartment early, letting himself in with the key she'd given him the week before. He heard voices in the kitchen. Y/n's laugh, bright and unguarded, and Hyunjin's low murmur in response. Felix moved toward the sound, smiling, ready to join them.
He stopped in the doorway.
Hyunjin had Y/n pressed against the counter, his hands on her waist, kissing her with an intensity that made Felix's breath catch. It wasn't the kiss itself—they'd all kissed each other countless times. It was the way Hyunjin held her, like she was his and his alone. The way Y/n's fingers tangled in Hyunjin's hair, the soft sound she made against his mouth. The way neither of them noticed Felix standing there, watching, feeling something ugly and possessive twist in his gut.
Felix cleared his throat.
They broke apart, Y/n's cheeks flushed, Hyunjin's eyes dark and unreadable. "Felix," Y/n said, breathless. "We didn't hear you come in."
"Obviously," Felix said, and the word came out sharper than he intended.
Hyunjin's expression shifted, defensiveness flickering across his face. "We were just..."
"I know what you were doing," Felix interrupted, and he hated the bitterness in his own voice. "Don't let me interrupt."
"Felix…" Y/n started, but Felix was already moving past them, grabbing a water bottle from the fridge with more force than necessary.
The silence stretched, taut and uncomfortable. Hyunjin was still standing close to Y/n, his hand on her hip, and Felix wanted to scream at him to move, to give her space, to stop claiming her like she belonged to him.
"Are you okay?" Y/n asked softly, as she walked over to him, reaching out to gently grab his hand.
Felix laughed low and sarcastic, "I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be fine?"
"You seem upset," Hyunjin said, and there was an edge to his voice now. "If you have something to say..."
"I don't," Felix said quickly. Too quickly. "I'm fine. Really."
But he wasn't fine. And they all knew it.
“I saw a car outside, as I came in. Dark tinted windows.. um, looks like the same car I’ve seen outside Hyunjins apartment as well.” Felix ran his fingers through his long hair. “We need to be careful.”
"We're already careful," Y/n said, frustration bleeding through. "We barely see each other as it is."
"Maybe we need to see each other less," Hyunjin said, and Felix felt his anger rise instantly.
"Is that what you want?" Felix asked, and he couldn't keep the accusation out of his tone. "To see us less? Or just me?"
Hyunjin's eyes snapped to his. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Nothing," Felix said, but it wasn't nothing. It was the way Hyunjin always sat next to Y/n, always reached for her first, always looked at her like Felix was just an afterthought. "Forget it."
"No, say what you mean," Hyunjin pressed, his voice rising. "If you have a problem—"
"I don't have a fucking problem," Felix raised his voice, and Y/n was looking between them with something like fear in her eyes.
"Guys, please—" She started but was cut off.
"He clearly has a problem," Hyunjin said, ignoring her. "He's been acting weird for weeks."
"I'm acting weird?" Felix's voice rose to match Hyunjin's. "You're the one who can't stand it when I'm alone with her for five minutes. You're the one who acts like she's yours and yours alone."
"She's not yours, Felix. I had her long before you came along," Hyunjin shot back, and the words hung in the air like a slap.
Y/n made a small, wounded sound. "Stop. Both of you, just stop."
They stopped, but the damage was done. Jealousy that had been festering beneath the surface was out in the open now, raw and ugly and impossible to ignore.
Felix left that night without saying goodbye, and neither of them tried to stop him.
The stress started seeping into everything after that. The next day, one of the managers pulled Hyunjin aside after practice, asked him pointed questions about who he'd been spending time with. Hyunjin lied smoothly, but Felix could see the panic in his eyes when he came back.
At Y/n's apartment that night, Hyunjin was distant, distracted. When Felix tried to talk to him, Hyunjin snapped that he was fine, that everyone needed to stop hovering.
"We're not hovering," Y/n said quietly. "We're worried about you."
"Well, don't be," Hyunjin said, and his voice was cold. "I can handle it."
But he couldn't handle it. Felix watched him spiral over the next few weeks. The jealousy got worse. Hyunjin would snap at Felix for the smallest things. For touching Y/n's shoulder. For making her laugh. For existing in the same space as her.
"You're being ridiculous," Felix said one night after Hyunjin had glared at him for sitting too close to Y/n on the couch.
"Am I?" Hyunjin's voice was sharp. "Or are you just oblivious?"
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means you don't see the way you look at her," Hyunjin said, and there was something desperate in his voice now. "Like she's yours. Like I'm not even here."
"That's not..." Felix started, but Hyunjin cut him off.
"Isn't it? You think I don't notice? You think I don't see the way you touch her, the way you..." Hyunjin was cut off by Y/n. His eyes holding a bit of surprise.
"Stop," Y/n said, her voice breaking. "Please, both of you, just stop. I’m both of yours and both of you are mine.”
But they couldn't stop. The jealousy had taken root, poisoning everything. Felix resented the way Hyunjin monopolized Y/n's time, the way he acted like he had more claim to her because he'd known her first. Hyunjin resented the way Y/n lit up around Felix, the way she laughed at his jokes, the way she seemed lighter when it was just the two of them.
And Y/n was caught in the middle, trying to hold them together, trying to love them both equally, trying to be enough for two people who were slowly tearing each other apart.
Eventually Hyunjins jealousy began to get the better of him. "He's going to leave," Y/n said to Felix one night when Hyunjin had canceled again. "He's going to choose his career over us and I can't even blame him."
"He loves you," Felix said, but the words felt hollow. "He's just scared."
"Love isn't enough," Y/n said, tears streaming down her face. "Not when we're destroying each other."
Felix pulled her close, held her while she cried, and felt his own heart breaking because he knew she was right.
The end came on a Thursday night, seven months and two weeks after it had all begun.
Felix had his own key to Y/n's apartment now, and he let himself in late, exhausted from practice. The lights were dim, and he heard voices coming from the living room—low, intimate, the kind of voices people used when they thought they were alone.
Felix moved toward the sound, and what he saw made his blood run cold.
Hyunjin had Y/n pressed against the couch, but this time it was different than all the times before. This time Hyunjin's hands were under her shirt, his mouth on her neck. Her legs wrapped tightly around Hyunjins hips as he slowly pumped in and out of her. Y/n was making those soft sounds that Felix knew, that he'd heard in the dark, that he thought belonged to all of them.
But right now, in this moment, it was just the two of them. “Tell me you love me.. only me.” Hyunjin mumbled against Y/n’s heated skin.
Without hesitation, with her head tilted back she moaned, “I love you, just you..only you.”
Something in Felix him snapped. "Are you fucking kidding me?" The words came out harsh, loud, shattering the intimacy of the moment.
They broke apart, Y/n's eyes wide with shock, Hyunjin's face flushing with something that looked like guilt but also defiance.
"Felix…" Y/n started, but Felix was already moving forward, his hands shaking with rage, hurt, and jealousy he'd been trying to suppress for months.
"What the hell is this?" Felix demanded, looking at Hyunjin. "What, you get her alone and suddenly I don't exist?"
"It's not like that," Hyunjin said, but his voice was defensive, sharp. "We weren't—"
"Weren't what? Weren't just fucking and exclaiming your love for one another! Without a single thought given to me? Weren't acting like this is just about the two of you?" Felix's voice rose, all the hurt and resentment of the past months pouring out. "You've been doing this for weeks, Hyunjin. Acting like she's yours. Like I'm just…just some third wheel you have to tolerate."
"That's not true," Y/n said, her voice shaking, but Felix barely heard her.
"Isn't it?" Felix turned to her, and he hated the way his voice cracked. "When's the last time you called me first? When's the last time it was just us? It's always him. It's always Hyunjin."
"Because he needs me," Y/n said, and the words hit Felix like a physical blow. "He's falling apart, Felix. This really is taking a toll on him.”
"And what about me?" Felix's voice broke completely. "What about what I need? Or do I not matter as much because I'm not the one having a breakdown?"
"Felix, that's not fair," Hyunjin said, and his voice was cold now, all the guilt replaced with anger. "You don't get to talk like that.”
"Don't get to what? Be hurt? Be jealous? Feel like I'm losing both of you?" Felix laughed, the sound bitter and broken. "You're the one who can't handle this, Hyunjin. You're the one who's been pulling away, who's been acting like loving us is some kind of burden you can't carry."
"It is a burden," Hyunjin shouted, and the words echoed in the small kitchen. "It is a fucking burden because every day I wake up terrified that we're going to get caught, that everything I've worked for is going to disappear, that I'm going to destroy not just my career but yours too, and the whole group's, and I’m terrified…she’s going to wake up one day and realize she should be choosing you,not me!” Tears were falling from his wide eyes.
Felix shot back. "You think I'm not scared? You think I don't lie awake at night thinking about the same things? But I'm still here. I'm still trying. I'm not the one who's been pushing everyone away."
"Maybe you should be," Hyunjin said, and his voice was vicious now, cruel in a way Felix had never heard before. "Maybe you should be the one to walk away because clearly you can't handle sharing her. You want her all to yourself. You always have."
"That's not true," Felix said, but his voice wavered because maybe it was true, maybe he did want Y/n to himself sometimes, maybe he was tired of always being second.
"Isn't it?" Hyunjin pressed, moving closer, and there was something wild in his eyes. "You resent that she loved me first. That she chose me first. You're just the friend who got lucky enough to be included."
The words hit Felix extremely hard, “Fuck you," he said, his voice shaking. "Fuck you, Hyunjin. You’re so fucking selfish.”
"Stop!" Y/n's voice cut through the room, sharp and desperate. "Both of you, just stop!"
They both turned to look at her, and Felix's heart broke at the sight. She was crying, her whole body shaking, and she looked smaller somehow, like the weight of their anger was crushing her.
"I can't do this," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. "I can't—I can't be the thing you fight over. I can't be the reason you hate each other."
"We don't hate each other," Felix said automatically, but the words felt like a lie.
"Don't you?" Y/n looked between them, and her eyes were devastated. "Because it feels like you do. It feels like you're tearing each other apart and I'm just some prize to have.”
"That's not—" Hyunjin started, but Y/n shook her head.
"It is. You're both so consumed with who gets more of me, who I love more, who has more claim, that you've forgotten we're supposed to be in this together. All three of us. But we're not together anymore, are we? We're just—we're just three people destroying each other."
The silence that followed was deafening. Felix stared at Y/n, at the tears streaming down her face, and felt something in his chest shatter completely. She was right. They were destroying each other. The jealousy, the fear, the constant competition for her attention—it had poisoned everything.
"I can't do this anymore," Hyunjin said finally, and his voice was hollow. "I can't keep pretending this can work when it's killing all of us."
"So that's it?" Felix asked, and he could hear the desperation in his own voice. "You're just giving up?"
"I'm choosing to survive," Hyunjin said, and he looked at Felix with something that might have been regret or might have been relief. "I'm choosing my career. My members. My future. Because this..." He gestured between the three of them. "This isn't a future. This is just slow suicide."
"Hyun…" Y/n's voice broke on his name, but Hyunjin was already moving toward the door.
"I'm sorry," he said, and he wouldn't look at either of them. "I'm so sorry. But I can't do this. I just cant”
He left then, the door closing behind him with a soft click that sounded like the end of the world.
Felix and Y/n stood in the kitchen, the silence suffocating. Felix wanted to reach for her, wanted to hold her, wanted to promise that they could make this work without Hyunjin. But looking at her face, at the devastation in her eyes, he knew it was pointless.
"It wasn't just about him," Y/n said quietly. "It was about all three of us. And now it's broken. All of it."
"We could…you and I could figure this out.”Felix spoke up, but Y/n shook her head.
"No. We can't. Don't you see? It was about the three of us together. And without him..." Her voice broke. "Without him, it's just a reminder of what we lost."
Felix felt tears burning his eyes. "So what are you saying?"
"I'm saying I can't do this either," Y/n whispered. "I can't look at you without seeing him. Without remembering what we had. Without feeling like I'm betraying him by still wanting you." There was a short pause. Felix had no words… "I need you to go," she said, and her voice was gentle but final. "I need—I need to be alone."
Felix wanted to argue, wanted to fight, wanted to make her see that they could salvage this. But looking at her face, at the exhaustion and heartbreak etched into her features, he knew it was over.
"Okay," he said quietly, and the word felt like surrender. "Okay."
He left, and he didn't look back.
The aftermath was worse than Felix could have imagined.
Practice became torture. Hyunjin was there every day, professional and distant, and they moved around each other like strangers. But it wasn't just distance now—it was resentment. Felix could feel it radiating off Hyunjin every time they were in the same room, could see it in the way Hyunjin's jaw tightened when Felix spoke, the way he avoided Felix's eyes like looking at him caused physical pain.
And Felix felt it too. The anger. The bitterness. The crushing weight of everything they'd said to each other that night in Y/n's kitchen. The cruel words that couldn't be taken back. The accusations that had exposed truths neither of them wanted to face.
They'd destroyed each other. And worse, they'd destroyed their friendship in the process.
The other members noticed. Chan pulled Felix aside one day, concern etched into his features. "What happened between you and Hyunjin?"
"Nothing," Felix lied, and Chan looked skeptical but didn't push.
Felix tried to reach out to Y/n, but she didn't respond to his texts. When he showed up at her apartment, she didn't answer the door even though he knew she was home. After the fifth unanswered message, he stopped trying.
Weeks passed. Then months. Felix existed in a strange limbo, going through the motions of his life without really living it. He went to practice, performed on stage, smiled for cameras, and felt nothing.
But late at night, alone in his room, Felix let himself remember. Not the good parts…those hurt too much. He remembered the fight. The cruel words. The way Hyunjin had looked at him with something close to hatred. The way Y/n had cried. The way everything had fallen apart not because of external pressure but because they'd torn each other apart from the inside.
He saw Y/n once, months later, walking down the street near the studio he had been practicing in. She looked different—thinner, sadder, like something vital had been carved out of her. Felix almost called out to her, almost ran after her, but then she turned a corner and disappeared, and Felix let her go because what was the point?
Hyunjin was harder to avoid. They worked together, lived in the same apartment building, existed in the same spaces. But they never spoke beyond what was necessary for work. Never looked at each other longer than required. Never acknowledged what they'd been to each other.
Sometimes their eyes would meet across a room and Felix would see something in Hyunjin's expression…regret, longing, anger…before Hyunjin looked away.
They were both suffering. They were both broken. But they were suffering and broken separately, alone, and there was no going back. The jealousy had poisoned everything. The cruel words had destroyed what little remained. And now they were just two people who used to love each other, who used to be friends, who now couldn't even stand to be in the same room.
Four months after everything fell apart, Felix found himself walking past Hyunjin's apartment. He stood in the hallway, wondering if Hyunjin was home, wondering if he ever thought about that first night when everything had seemed possible.
But there was no sound coming from behind the door. And Felix realized it didn't matter.
He turned and walked away, and he didn't look back.
Hihihiiii I JUST started read8ng ur fics and im OBSESSED. Love your workk 🫶🫶
I wanted to request a Felix fic or hc of him being sub for the first time, and he just likes it a bit TOO much 👀
You can change up somethings or not do the ric if you're not comfortable!! Lovelovelove uu💙💙
HEHEHEH I LOVE THIS 😈 and thank you omg ilysm. i def need to do more sub felix. i lit loved writing this:,) hope u enjoy <33333
first time sub, a little nervy
sub!felix x dom!reader
word count: 1.8k
synopsis ⋆˚꩜｡ felix subs for the first time, and he VERY much enjoys it. and is a natural;)
synopsis ⋆˚꩜｡ smuuuuuut
cw: cunnilingus, cum eating, cumming w/o being touched, sex suggestive (cuts off), fingering, felix is whiny
This is crazy.
Your boyfriend is so beautiful. He looks so sweet and adorable, but in the bedroom? That man is a monster.
He slaps, bites, spits, teases, and loves to degrade you.
And you love that shit. You really really really do. You lowkey love when he talks to you like you’re dumb.
“Look at you… so dumb for me. Gonna fuck you stupid, baby.” Came immediately.
“Such a slut for my dick.. Such a good slut, you’re so good. My good girl.” You immediately dropped to your knees.
He never goes too far to actually injure you, or hurt you. You actually asked him to be more aggressive. It’s extremely attractive.
But lately? You’d be lying if you said you hadn’t really imagined your pretty little boyfriend being submissive.
You’ve never really seen him be like that for you. The only time he was kind of along those lines was your guys’ first. He asked permission for everything, and would say please. It was pretty hot.
But at that time you kinda wanted to try to see him dominant, then you got a little carried away.
But, lowkey? You’re wanting to see the opposite. So… you asked.
He was sitting down on the couch, watching tv, when you returned from work. You kicked off your shoes, removed your sweater, and set your purse down. Removing your coat, you observed him.
He looked so good. So beautiful.
His face was so puppyish, and he looked extremely into the television. Then.. you started to imagine that look while he was under you, in your shared bed.
A strong heat shot throughout your body, and you caught your bottom lip between your teeth.
You approached him, and sat down beside him. He smiled at you, wrapping his arm around the back of your shoulders. He turned to face you.
He asked about work, blah blah blah. You answered questions, but you were pretty tuned out the whole time. Cause you just kept imagining.
Imagining your beautiful boyfriend begging and crying under you for you to touch him. Like jesus. Wtff?
You got a little too into it, cause you realized too late that your boyfriend had been repeating your name.
“Earth to y/n?” He chuckled, his head cocked to the side to try to get into your line of sight. You turned your head toward him, and laughed.
“Sorry, I was a little spaced out.”
“A little?? What were you thinking about, my love?” He smiled.
“Nothing.” You cleared your throat, turning more toward him.
“Baby, tell me.” He said so softly, his fingers grazed your jaw. He leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss.
It usually would be so sweet, but honestly? The kiss just turned you on more. The heat that’s been building due to your imagination is stuck bubbling in your lower stomach.
“Just like, you.”
“What about me?” He smiled.
“Uh, submissive you.” You laugh, saying simply. His eyebrows raised.
“Oh.” He said. You nodded. Then he smiled, “Do you want me to try it? I mean, I don’t know how i’d be. But I can try.”
You nodded.
Then, here you are. You crashed your lips against each other, and you dragged him into your guys’ shared bedroom.
Your lips are moving against eachother sloppily, and when you pull away to speak, a string of saliva follows you. You watch his mouth chase your warmth slightly when you pull back, and you smile.
“Down.” You say simply, almost whispering.
He blinks, then slowly lowers himself onto his knees. You can tell he’s a little iffy, due to the foreign territory.
But, oh my god, he looks so beautiful. His soft features staring up at you.
Jesus christ. (No, i’m Castiel. Sorry niche reference.)
“Hands and knees, baby.” You add, and he takes a moment. He looks at his hands, then slowly drops them onto the ground. He’s now staring up at you, on all fours. Like.. wow. What?
You move past him, and crawl up onto the bed. You rest your back against the headboard, and take off your trousers. You’re left in a tank top and your white, lace panties. You lift your knees, bending them, and spreading your thighs ever so slightly.
“Come on up, sweetie.” You call out, and you watch as he slowly moves up onto the bed. His eyes immediately catch your spread legs that expose your panties, his breath hitching. He puts his weight on his hands, then lifts his legs as well. He’s now on his hands and knees on the bed, and you swear you can hear him swallow.
He crawls forward, immediately heading toward your spread legs.
But, no. You didn’t give him permission.
You lift a leg, pressing the top of your foot against his forehead, pushing him away. He genuinely whines, lifting off of his hands and sitting on his feet, his hands instead placed on his knees.
“No, baby. Bad boy. I didn’t tell you to come to me, did I?”
He shakes his head, his expression soft, and submissive. Just how you imagined it’d be. He looks so fucking perfect. Your pretty boyfriend, being so obedient.
“Are you gonna be good for me? You better be.” You say sternly, dropping your foot slowly. He nods so quickly you think he may get whiplash.
You hum, as if considering if he’s allowed to come toward you. Or even breathe the same air.
“Come closer, baby.” You say softly.
He immediately drops his hands onto the bed, and crawls closer toward you. “Good boy.” You smile.
“Do you want to make me feel good, honey? Do you wanna be good for me??” You say condescendingly, cocking your head slightly to the side.
“Yes, please. Please, baby.” He finally speaks, practically whining at the thought of being able to taste you. Like it’s a gift. And it is.
You hum, “Okay.”
He lets out a whimper, immediately lowering his body to be level with your clothed core. His fingers catch around the fabric of your panties, and he glances up at you. You smile. So he begins to pull them down, exposing your glistening heat.
It’s very clear that you’re enjoying this.
You feel his breath ghost against you, the warmth of his breath however not nearly as warm as your core. So, it instead sends a cold gush of wind, contrasting with the heat below.
You let out a quick exhale at the feeling, glancing down at him, chewing your bottom lip gently.
His eyes move up to your face again, then he drops his gaze onto the sight before him. He presses a gentle kiss onto the sensitive skin at the top, then sucks softly. That encourages a whimper to escape from your throat.
His tongue darts out, and licks an excruciatingly slow line up your heat, then back down. Your hips jerk, and he hums.
Then he goes all in, his lips cling to your core as he continues his relentless licks. He occasionally adds a few sucks to your clit, humming too, sending a vibration throughout your body.
Your throat exposes you. Whimpers, moans, and curses slip past your lips as his mouth moves so expertly against your core. He knows you so well, knows what you like.
He knows when he darts out his tongue and pushes it inside you, it makes you tighten your walls, and also tighten your thighs.
He loves the feeling of your thighs clamping his head in place, he really does.
He eats it so good. God damn. You genuinely forget that you’re supposed to be ordering him around for just a second, but then you do remember.
You remember because you catch his hand guiding itself down into his sweatpants. That lets you catch a glimpse of the protruding tent in his sweats. Once you see his hand slip under his waistband, one of your hands grip tight on his hair, cocking his head back. That throws a whimper out of his throat.
“Did I say you could touch yourself?” You ask, furrowing your eyebrows.
He shakes his head, and takes his hand out of his pants. He whines quietly, “It aches.”
“Deal with it. You’re focusing on me.” You respond, removing your grip on his hair.
He nods, “Okay. I can. I will.” He answers, and moves back down to your core. He continues his relentless sucks and licks, and even adds two of his slender fingers into your core. Pumping in and out, fucking you with his pointer and middle finger as his tongue flicks against your clit repeatedly.
“Fuck—“ You cry out, your walls clenching tight as your lower stomach begins to tighten. “Yes— Oh my— Oh my god..” You whine, and Felix throws out one more aggressive suck to your clit, encouraging your climax.
You moan incredibly loud, your back arching off of the bed sheets as you cum. Your fluids escape, gathering on his fingers, the wet sound somehow getting louder as he rides out your high with his fingers.
You’re panting, and you hear Felix moan, his head dropping down onto your pelvic bone. You glance down to see his hips grinding against the bed, and they stutter with each rut. Your brain doesn’t really process what he had just done, and you’re also interrupted by your own moan when he removes his fingers.
He looks up at you, placing his fingers in between his closed lips, licking off the excess fluids that had left your body. His face is flushed, and his eyebrows are knitted.
He removes his fingers from his mouth with a pop, then lifts himself up slowly, as if nervous.
And you see why.
There’s a large wet spot placed right on the crotch of his sweatpants, making it clear what his previous actions that you were clueless about had been caused by.
He literally came in his pants. He has never done that before.
You’re already turned on again. Oh my god.
You reach a hand out toward him, encouraging him to move closer. He literally looks so embarrassed. You feel maternal and extremely turned on all at once.
He crawls closer toward you, and you smile.
“You’re such a good boy, baby. You’re so good for me. So obedient. I think you deserve to put it in, yeah?” You coo, and your boyfriend nods so submissively. Jesus like… You can’t even.
“Go on then, honey.” You smile.
He removes his pants so slowly, his already hardened cock escaping when his waistband falls past his hips. His top is red and irritated from the rutting, precum already slipping out slowly.
You sit up, and push him down onto his back. He’s staring up at you, panting quietly.
You wrap your fingers around his cock, and a whimper leaves his throat. Your thumb slides against the head of his cock, spreading his pre.
His hips jerk up, and he whines. “Oh, shit—”
“Please fuck me raw, y/n. Please baby. God, please. I’ll do anything for you.” He begs, “I’ll be so good for you. I’ll be the best.”
Oh. He is really enjoying this.
“Okay, baby. Only because you asked so nicely.” You say softly, smiling as you throw a leg over the other side of his hips.
You’re gonna keep it in mind that he loves being submissive for you. For sure.
He then lasted about two minutes. Cute! He’s never gonna live that down.
EEEK I LOVE SUB FELIX RAAAHHH. i must do more of this
The two of you said hi to each other occasionally in class, but more often that not it was more you waving and her grimacing as she nodded in greeting. The only reason why the two of you knew each other was because you’d been partnered for a project in a course you shared last year; that’s also how she had your number.
So, no, you and Nari were not friends.
You weren’t great at making friends, though. You had a few, though you guess you’d consider them more acquaintances than anything. People you sat with during courses or waved hi to in the halls. But no one you went out shopping with. No one who invited you out to bars on a Friday night.
Realistically, you should’ve known that it was a ruse. That Nari, pretty, popular Nari who laughed with all her friends during lectures, who never got called out by the professors, who had flocks of boys vying for her attention, would never actually want to spend her Friday night with you.
You feel underdressed. Severely underdressed.
But Nari hadn’t told you that you were supposed to dress up. You’d already gone out of your comfort zone, dressed out of your sweaters and leggings and instead in black jeans and a top that showed a bit more skin than you usually did. It wasn’t anything crazy, but you’d left your dorm feeling a little more confident than you normally did.
And then Nari came around the corner dressed in a tiny black dress that left absolutely nothing to imagination and looked stunning while doing so.
You’d cringed into yourself, wishing you’d grabbed a jacket, and smiled awkwardly at you.
“You look great,” you say, and you mean it because she really does. God, if only you looked that way in a dress like that. Long, skinny legs and curves that fill the dress out nicely. Paired with her waist, she looked like every insecure thought you’d ever had all wrapped up into a perfect package.
“Thanks,” she smiles, but it in no way reaches her eyes. You don’t miss it, so you smile wider in discomfort. “You look… good, too.”
You’re not oblivious to the contempt in her voice. Or the fact that her compliment is very clearly fake and forced. You just continue to smile, asking if you guys should head inside. Nari nods stiffly and before you can even turn, she is stepping in front of you to make her way in first.
She leads you over to the bar, taking a seat and merely sending you a glance out of the corner of her eye when you sit down beside her.
“I also invited some guys from our class,” Nari says.
You turn to her, surprised. “Oh,” you mumble, feeling that tightness in your chest again. It wasn’t like she wasn’t allowed to, but some more warning would’ve been nice. Your state of dressing was starting to feel even more humiliating when you thought about how you looked compared to her.
“Yeah, they should be…” But her voice trails as something catches her eye over your shoulder, face pulling into a wide smile. “Felix! Over here!”
You freeze at that name. She didn’t mean him, did she—
“Hey guys.”
That familiar deep voice causes every muscle in your body to tense. You’d recognize that distinct voice from anywhere. You’d heard it enough times during class, when you tried to not so obviously stare at him and melt into a puddle at said voice.
Slowly, you glance over your shoulder, nerves lighting up when sure enough you’re greeted by Felix, and the two friends he often sat with during lecture Han and Hyunjin. All three men were incredibly attractive, a fact that most of the female and male population at your university agreed with. And really, you guess you should’ve figured that when Nari said she invited some ‘guys from your class’, this is who she meant.
After all, you’ve seen her none too subtly flirting with Felix for the past two weeks during lecture.
Felix is all smiles as he reaches the two of you, and Han and Hyunjin are laughing about something as they come up behind him. Their eyes meet yours briefly, but it’s Felix’s gaze you get caught on, feeling your breath get caught in the back of your throat.
This was humiliating.
Nari all but squeals at Felix, jumping to her feet as she wraps her arms around him in greeting. Your eyes widen at the action, feeling that it was a little overly friendly. You’re clearly not the only one who thinks so as you catch Felix stumbling back slightly in response, hands awkwardly wrapping around her back to return the hug.
When she pulls back, she’s smiling up at Felix, batting her eyes at him.
“And what are we?” Hyunjin snorts, “chopped-liver?”
Han laughs at that, nudging the older boy in the arm.
Nari rolls her eyes; “hi,” she greets dryly.
It’s clear she’s only really here for Felix.
“Hi Y/N,” Felix greets, and it takes you half a second that you’re the Y/N he’s talking to you. Your eyes fall on him, lips parted in shock, taking in the warm smile he’s greeting you with. You shouldn’t be that surprised, you guess. Felix was known around the campus for being incredibly friendly and approachable.
It was just in his nature.
“Hi Felix,” you smile shyly, offering him a wave. Then, remembering how Nari had all but ignored them, you turn to his friends. “Hello Han. Hello Hyunjin.”
They greet you back in return, before catching each other's gaze. Some sort of message is shared between the two of them and before you know it their nudging Felix in the back, laughing.
Well, that was weird.
“Let’s go find a table,” Nari says, clearly not happy not having the attention on her. She links her arms through Felix’s and starts pulling him with her, ignoring the surprised sound that leaves his lips.
You, Han and Hyunjin trail behind them.
You all order drinks, luckily finding a table, and as you sit there, sipping your fruity cocktail, you’re really starting to wonder why Nari invited you. She spends the entire time draped over Felix, clearly flirting with him and despite her initial passing greeting, she makes sure to include Han and Hyunjin in the conversation where she sees fit.
She however pointedly ignores you.
So, for the first twenty minutes, you sit there, taking small sips of your drink and desperately wishing you’d declined her invitation so you could be at home right now.
“What about you, Y/N?”
It takes you a moment to realize they’re talking to you. Blinking out of your thoughts, you realize it’s Felix who’d asked the question, meeting your eyes with a warm smile. Hyunjin and Han who are sitting next to you are also waiting for your response.
Nari is pointedly glaring at you.
“Uh,” you laugh awkwardly, not having a clue what he’s asking because you hadn’t been listening. “Sorry?”
You expect him to roll his eyes, sigh when he realizes you hadn’t been paying attention. That’s what most people do when you zone out. He does none of that.
Instead, Felix continues to smile; “we’re talking about that paper coming up. Han hasn’t started, of course–”
“Hey!”
“And Hyunjin and I were talking about how we’re struggling.” You don’t miss the way he neglects to mention Nari. “What about you? Knowing you, you’ve probably already written it, huh?”
You blink at him, wide-eyed.
“Uh, yeah,” you nod. “I finished it a few days ago…”
Felix laughs and your cheeks burn.
“Is that embarrassing to admit?” You ask, because you truly don’t know.
“Definitely,” Nari scoffs, rolling her eyes. “Who finishes assignments that early?”
You curl into yourself, swallowing thickly. But before you can drown in your own humiliation further, Felix speaks up;
“I don’t think it is,” he assures, smiling warmly at you. “I admire that dedication. I always struggle. I’m not surprised though,” he laughs, “you’re like one of the smartest in the class.”
You don’t think your eyes could be anymore wide.
Is… Is that what he really thinks? You hadn’t even thought he was aware of your existence before today.
“I’m so jealous,” Han groans next to you, head flopped back against the bench seat. “I have no idea how to even begin this paper.”
“That’s because you fell asleep during the lecture,” Hyunjin snorts, rolling his eyes.
“Yah!”
Felix and Hyunjin laugh, high fiving each other across the table.
Han pouts, before his eyes widen and he turns to you. “Yah, Y/N!”
Your head jerks back when his face is suddenly in front of yours. “Y-Yes?”
“Do you think you could help me with the paper?”
“Oi,” Hyunjin huffs, grabbing Han’s shoulder and pulling him back. “Finish your paper by your damn self. And don’t crowd her.”
“But—!”
Swallowing thickly, you sit back up. You’re not used to having this much attention on yourself, but Han’s pout is a little too adorable for you to ignore.
“I won’t write it for you,” you say, making sure he knows that you won’t help him cheat. “But I could help you come up with some ideas.”
Han’s eyes practically light up. Before you know it, he’s wrapping you up in a hug, causing you to freeze at the touch. He doesn’t seem to notice, squeezing you tightly.
“You’re a literal life saver, Y/N!”
Cheeks warm, you laugh lightly; “no problem, Han.”
“Hey, Felix,” Nari coos, pulling the attention back on her. You turn to look at her, watching the way she clutches onto Felix’s arm tighter, pulling him flush against him. You think maybe Felix is uncomfortable given the slight pinch of his face. “I could help you with your paper, too.”
Felix hesitates; “uh, no that’s okay.”
“Come on,” she laughs and it’s pitched. Everyone winces at it. “I’d be a lot of help. More help than Y/N, for sure.”
You pause at the insult, grip tightening on the glass of your drink.
“Nari, what the hell?” Felix asks, pulling back enough to glare at her.
She scoffs. “What? It’s true.” Rolling her eyes, her gaze shifts to you. You’re surprised by the sheer amount of hatred she regards you with. “I mean, look at her.”
“Nari—”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Han cuts in, glaring at the girl.
“It’s obvious,” Nari shrugs, flipping her hair back. “Maybe she’s smart, but beyond that, it’s not like she’d be much help for anything.”
“Like opening her legs for the first guy that looks at her?” Hyunjin scoffs.
You freeze, turning to Hyunjin in surprise.
Nari, however, turns to Felix.
“Felix,” she whines, clutching onto his arm tighter. “Tell your friend to apologize to me.”
Felix just stares back at her.
Feeling like you should say something, you sit forward; “Nari,” you call, somewhat tentatively. “I’m sorry if I offended you in someway, but you’re the one who invited me—”
“Hah!” Nari cuts you off, voice sharp and cruel. “You really are stupid!”
Lips left parted, you stare back at her.
“Did you think I invited you here because I wanted to hang out with you?”
That humiliation creeps back up, burning the back of your neck and making your chest tight. You don’t have it in you to look at Han and Hyunjin and definitely not Felix as Nari all but laughs at you.
“I invited you to make me look better,” Nari says, practically spitting the words at you. “I mean… look at you. I can’t believe you actually thought I’d want to be seen with you for any other reason.”
Shame burns through you.
There’s a moment of stunned silence. All you feel is eyes on you. It makes you feel worse and you can feel your eyes watering with tears. In a split second decision, you’re standing to your feet and all but pushing your way past Han and Hyunjin, ignoring the calls after you as you race out of the bar.
You feel like you can’t breathe. Your heart aches with the realization that Nari had just been using you. Sure, you knew you weren’t friends but you didn’t think she was using you for such a… cruel reason.
Pressing a hand against your lips to stifle your tears, you press yourself against the wall of the bar. You needed to get home and fast. You needed to get home so you could cry without eyes prying on you.
“—Y/N! Y/N, where… Oh, Y/N.”
You curl into yourself tighter when you realize it’s Felix that’s come out looking for you. You can’t stand to look at him right now, not after what Nari had said. Not after the way she’d humiliated you in front of him and his friends. Not after she’d reminded you of your reality.
You hear him approaching and turn away, trying to quiet your cries.
“Y/N, I—”
“I’m fine,” you cut in, wanting nothing more than for him to leave. The only thing worse than what happened inside, is having Felix see you cry because of it. “I’m fine. Just… Just go back inside.”
And he’s quiet for a moment, before;
“Nari’s a bitch.”
It surprises you, enough to pull your eyes on him. What did he—
“What she did was cruel,” Felix says, face serious as he meets your watery eyes. “I have no intention of going back there and entertaining her. Honestly, I never did.”
Shaking your head, you whisper; “what does that mean?”
“I only agreed to come because Nari said you’d be there,” Felix says.
That… That can’t be right.
“What?” You breathe, baffled. “Why… Why would that matter?”
Felix’s cheeks burn red then, the tips of his ears too and he’s rubbing the back of his neck, almost nervously. “I’ve had a crush on you for a while,” he admits, avoiding your eyes. “I’ve always wanted to talk to you in class, but never could. Hyunjin and Han have been teasing me about it relentlessly. So of course when I told them I was meeting you at the bar tonight, they tagged along.”
Still confused, you glance back towards the bar. “B-But Nari—”
“Is a bitch,” he repeats, shrugging. “I was confused why you’d be hanging with her. Now I see why. I’m so sorry, Y/N. That was… awful of her.”
Licking your lips, you wipe at the tears streaming down your cheeks.
“And none of what she said was true.”
Meeting his eyes, you blink at him.
“I think you’re beautiful.”
“You… You do?”
Felix’s smile is bright and glowing. “I do.”
“Oh,” you breathe, feeling foolish and silly in that moment. Here is this beautiful man who you’ve had a crush on for a while calling you beautiful, all while you stand there in tears. “I-I don’t know what to say.”
“You don’t have to say anything,” Felix shrugs. “Except maybe to tell me if you’d let me take you on a date.”
Your eyes widen; “right now?”
Felix grins; “the nights still young.”
You stare back at him, thoroughly in disbelief.
Then, the bar doors slam open and two pairs of footsteps follow.
“Felix, bro, you just went—”
Whatever Han had been about to say falls silent the second he sees you there. Your eyes fall on him, then Hyunjin who’s grinning ear to ear behind him, before falling back to Felix who is not so subtly trying to tell them to buzz off.
“We’ll just head back,” Hyunjin says, grabbing Han by the shoulders. “You two have fun!”
“Don’t get too crazy!” Han yells, voice booming as you wince at the volume. You hear Hyunjin whisper at him to shut up, and their voices carry as Hyunjin all but drags Han away.
Felix turns to you, embarrassed; “sorry about them.”
“It’s okay,” you assure, smiling lightly as you sniffle.
“So?” Felix asks, looking at you with hope shining in his eyes.
And you hesitate for a moment. You’re still in disbelief that Felix has all but convinced he likes you. It’s hard to believe that someone like him would like you, but… but he’d called you beautiful.
You wanted to believe in that.
“Sure,” you smile, nodding at him. “I’d love to go on a date with you.”
ੈ✩ themes: heavy angst, hurt/ some comfort, skz imagines, regrets, begging
ੈ✩ warnings: (one-sided) arguments & shouting, reader has phono-phobia (fear of loud sounds), near road traffic accident
ੈ✩ synopsis: felix is being strangely avoidant and cold, and ends up snapping at you. He regrets it instantly, but you run away. To your own risk.
ੈ✩ word count: 4.0k
ੈ✩ photos credits: Pinterest
ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊ *ੈ
Happy stay week !!! :)))
I’m sooo excited for everything they have prepared :’) literally two albums within a week ??? (Rev it up you have been avenged…)
I’ve been meaning to write this up for a while… it’s not exactly a whimsy and joyful read sigh
Enjoy !! :)….. :(
ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊ *ੈ
—————————————————————————
Creaking open your apartment door in the late evening was usually your physical sigh of relief. Particularly after a long and arduous day at the library, and a walk home in the rain, trying and failing to dodge waves of people moving against you from a downturned gaze.
This time, there was a chilliness in the room. Most of the lights were off, and you had to peer round to the left to see felix hunched over the light of his phone, leaning on the kitchen counter.
“Hey it’s pretty dark in here angel?”
He slowly turned only half way towards you, just over his shoulder, “oh you’re back”, before turning back and sighing to himself.
To say it wasn't his usual bubbliness would be a vast understatement. You switched on a lamp near the door, illuminating the room just enough.
You approached him, your footsteps loud on the wooden floor.
“You alright baby?”
“Just fine”
Now you could feel the chilliness in your bones. You were reaching out a hand to his shoulder but it stopped at the tone of his voice.
You took one step back, echoing through the silence and dullness of the room.
“Ok… I’ll just be in the bedroom”, you said quietly, leaving to take your shoes off as fast as you could.
He just left you with no response.
–
In honesty, you were seriously worried. You tried to tell yourself everyone had bad days, but felix was never… like this. If he was ever down he’d usually just mutter a little quieter, and attach himself to you once you asked if he was ok.
It was the short replies that scared you most. They circled your brain in memory like vultures as you dumped your shoes back in the closet, face displaying your inner thoughts.
Over-thinking.
Whatever it was, it only ever usually took a hand on his back or meeting his eye to make him open up. You prayed to god at least that part remained the same. You'd have no idea where else to start.
Your stomach flipped as you opened the door.
Barrenness in the lounge. The sofa never looked so empty. Still, stood hunched over his phone in the kitchen.
You tentatively approached the fridge next to him and pried the door open. The light illuminated his face a little more, and you tried to glance over without making it obvious.
Light bags under his eyes and a scorn on his face. His hand frozen as he stared at his phone and didn’t scroll once. He picked his lip violently between his fingers. His phone’s brightness must have been on full beam.
You started speaking quietly.
“Have you eaten yet, sunshine?”
You’d absolutely never seen him like this and had not a clue where to start.
“I can make some dinner for us?”
He finally shut off his phone, but just swiftly stepped behind you with a sigh through his nose, moving towards the bedroom. Still no response.
You saw him get further away through the room and something burst in you.
“Felix”, you said, louder now, “please tell me what’s wrong”, you pleaded, immediately defeated.
He only stopped for a half-second on hearing his name, before moving just as decidedly to the bedroom, and closing the door shut.
You just looked at the floor, despondent.
–
It didn’t take you long to whip up something. You refused to admit to yourself that you made something quick so you could knock on the bedroom door and speak to him again, but it was the complete truth.
You were just plating it up, before you reconsidered it a second. Maybe you should just leave him. He obviously went to the room for a reason, maybe he needed to be left. But still, a part of your brain told you you needed to talk to him, and that part was too powerful. Needing to know and needing to know how to fix it. When he’d been so cold, so out of character. You knew it was wrong but couldn’t stop yourself.
Your whole internal debate changed when you turned, plate in your arms, to see felix’s silhouette in the door frame.
He shuffled towards you, hands in his pockets and looking at the floor. He reached close enough for you to offer your arms out, peering through the fallen hair on your face.
“Are you hungry at all, sunshine?”. Your face pleaded with him, not to eat but to give a response you knew how to work with.
He looked down at the plate, gave a short shake of his head and brushed past you.
Your heart sank and your stomach somersaulted. You had to focus to see that shake, and it was so subtle you almost thought you’d imagined it. And his eyes. Not even sadness in them, but tensity, working hand in hand with his obviously clenched jaw.
You were completely depleted. But you didn’t want to go away and sulk. You wanted to grab him by the shoulders and for him to acknowledge you, at least in some way.
You peered over to him on your right. His phone out again, fiddling for something in the drawer with his other hand.
You placed the plate down next to him, and leant both your hands on the counter. You were almost brushing shoulders, and to your own surprise, he didn’t shift at all. Although it wasn't exactly a warm response.
You took a deep breath to pluck up the milligram of courage left.
“Can you…”
Your voice faded. You were immediately mad at yourself for abandoning it two words in. Felix scrolled on his phone still, ignoring your presence as you purposefully brushed his shoulder. He sunk his head into his hand, and grasped his forehead. You could just about see the scowl on his face, and snapped.
“Maybe you should put your phone down”
You reached your hand over to his phone and lowered it gently to the counter, with a soft voice. You knew you shouldn’t have, really, but seeing that look on his face, your hand just started moving.
You regretted it instantly.
“Just leave me alone”, he snapped with a bubbling frustration in his voice, finally giving what you wanted and looking you dead in the eyes.
“I- I’m sorry lixie, I just… w- want to help”
“Well I don’t fucking need it”, he followed up with a bite in his yell, driving his hand into the drawer and slamming it shut.
In actuality, his own hand flinched as it closed. The sound was unintentional, but the effect all the same.
You visibly flinched at the crash, clenching your eyes shut. He knew you hated sounds like that, your hands held in a guard up by your face.
What was wrong with him… The frustration in eyes lingered, but his whole visage began to shift, stemming from his stomach, which turned at the sight of you.
You creaked your eyes open, and slowly looked up to his face, this time peering past your clenched fists.
His face was a mess of emotion. That frustration gone, a softer brow, but with an unreadable intensity in his eyes. He almost looked out of breath.
You could barely feel the tears fill your eyes before they began to stream.
You bolted around and made for the door. All you could reach for was your thinnest jacket by the door and your pair of sliders. It certainly wasn’t the clothing you needed for November rain, but you’d have gone out barefoot if it meant it got you out quicker.
You whimpered and brushed another tear away as your jacket sprung off the hook. You didn't even put it on before flinging the door open. You needed to imagine the whole apartment, the whole building didn’t exist, and that didn’t just happen.
You were halfway to shutting the door behind you as you heard a projected voice,
“Princess, wait”
The door was already shut, and your legs moving.
–
You walked for as long as your legs and head would take you. “Walked”, but really a combination between a run too. Your jacket clutched in your arms, despite the pelting rain on your face. It wouldn’t have helped realistically. You ducked your face from the rain and felix’s words echoed in a pound in your skull.
“Well I don’t fucking need it”
He didn’t fucking need you.
Your aching legs ran quicker. At least the pain took the voice out your head.
…
Your brain collapsed, and your legs almost did too. Your breath heaved in your chest. The rain was pelting your face, and you stopped walking, looking up at the sky for a face-front barrel.
The corner to your right held a small garden, and a dripping wooden bench. You stumbled over to sit down.
He didn’t fucking need you.
He didn’t exactly say it, but the feeling behind his eyes cracked your heart right open. You’d only just noticed you’d been crying hard this entire time. Lifting your knees up to your chin on the bench, the pain from running subsided, and you finally registered the aching behind your eyes.
To think, all the times you’d relied on him, leant on him.
You dropped your head, the rain still pelting.
“Well I don’t fucking need it”.
Your heart froze over.
–
The rain was still heavy, but more normal at least. Not cruel and relentless. Just heavy.
You forgot how long it was. Your head pounded. With guilt or hurt or something like it. It had completely immobilised you. You just sat, staring forward, your eyelids lulling in the pain, raindrops dripping off them.
He was your absolute everything… and he yelled at you… like that. There was something drawn across his face that you’d never ever seen before.
And the worst part was, you still didn’t know why.
That was the part that brought the guilt.
You shouldn’t have pushed. You shouldn’t have pressed in his personal space. You shouldn’t have pried to begin with.
There was a growing warm and dry patch between your stomach and thighs, your knee still raised high. You sank your face as far as you could into your thighs, and cried.
And after a few moments more, the rain…
Stopped.
Entirely.
Something about it… you didn’t think it was right. You could still hear the rain splash in the small lake in front of you.
You ripped your face from that slightly more comfortable spot on your legs.
The rain still pressed on the leaves, and left pretty ripples in the lake. The raindrops on your arms just slid off, with no new rain to work with.
…
“Hey”,
His voice was soft and low, like waking up a small pet.
You couldn’t look at him. You just sank your chin back into your kneecaps, your eyes bleeding more. Your face desolate of any emotion.
“If you don’t want to talk prin-...”
He took a breath and restarted.
“If you don’t want to talk… I understand… you don’t have to hear what I have to say… especially after how I acted…”
That last part he said more quietly. You thought you heard a lump in his throat. You kept the same visage.
He left it a second. You couldn’t tell whether he expected you to respond, or if he was just talking slowly so you’d actually take in his words past your pounding head.
“... but…”
Another restarting breath. You could sense how he was exhausted from his own words. And consequences.
“... but… I don’t want you to get wet… or sick…”
His words were full of care and concession, but your chest burned and you bit your lip back. Bit late for that.
“So please at least take the umbrella…”
…
You didn’t respond anything. You couldn’t. You couldn’t look at him. You were mad at him, you were heartbroken. And you didn’t know if you looked at him, if you’d see him or the face that spat those words.
He left it a generous time in silence for your response. He would’ve taken a shrug, or a twitch even. But nothing came from you. You wished he’d just break the stagnantness.
He asked for your response once more, offering you the umbrella closer so it was in your peripheral.
“Pri-... princess…?”
He hesitated. The combination of that, and his utterance, broke you. You could tell he knew he shouldn’t call you that. Not right now. But at the same time… he never called you anything else.
You shoved your eyes back into your knees and sobbed, words making it through sobs and creaks.
“... why did you yell at me like that…”
It was barely audible, but he still heard it. His face broke at your whine. He immediately moved round the back of the bench, still keeping the umbrella above you in the movement.
He sat down quietly next to you, a comfortable distance away, legs just tilted towards you and entering your other peripheral.
A part of him didn’t want to speak. It wasn’t explainable. Another part of him craved. More than anything. To just make it better.
“I-... nothing can excuse what I said… I– I just got—”
“You’ve never spoken to me like that”, you interrupted in a whisper, still looking bolt ahead.
He broke into pieces all over again. To his credit, he held back his tears. He didn't respond, and just looked down.
You could see his trembling hand clutching his kneecap. After a second of silence, it reached out in a hesitance to your cheek, but only reached halfway.
You fell into his shoulder. To the surprise of you both. Though you knew it was because of what you’d heard in his tone. His instant regret and remorse.
He was still there, your sunshine. Somewhere there. And it made you collapse, body and mind. In a messy combination of relief and anger.
“You’ve never spoken to me like that… why did you speak to me like that… you know I don’t like loud sounds, felix… you know…”
You sobbed repetitions into his shoulder, clawing at his collarbone with your hand. You didn’t need a response, and each utterance was another dagger to his heart.
After so long, he gently raised his hand to cup the back of your head, face distraught. So gently, you didn’t even feel it at first.
“I know… I’m really really sorry… I didn’t mean it I swear… I’m so so sorry, princess”, he uttered occasionally between your barely intelligible ramble.
You didn’t want to hear his reason. Why he was so cold all day, for the last 2 days even. It would just sound like an excuse. But you still needed to know, like he could transfer the reason mentally.
“Why did you…”, you started with a loud exertion. Your frustration has bubbled over.
You looked up at him dead in the eyes, finally. It took him off guard and he looked back with wide eyes, mouth agape. His eyes searched your face, half too surprised to respond and half searching for how to make it better in your own eyes.
It only took a second before he started speaking, but it was still too long for you.
Your face creased into another sob, and you launched off your knees. You’d realised all of a sudden you actually weren’t ready to talk. Not properly. You were too mad at him still to listen, even if he didn’t deserve to be listened to.
His face shattered as you stumbled into a pace, head down. Any direction away from him.
–
Any direction was purely emotive, but purely stupid. You barely heard him call after you as you were already strides away. Back in the rain, any voice would’ve been muffled.
Your head down, all you saw was the transfer of grass to cement. To the side of the road. You kept walking. It was a darker shade than usual on behalf of the rain.
He didn’t understand. Why did he do that.
You reached the curb…
He didn’t understand. Why did he do that.
Your legs were still taking you away, your head full of words that meant something and nothing, blocking your senses.
Lights. A faint flicker, then a larger more arrogant shine in your right peripheral, then back to a faint flicker.
“Princess”, a voice erupted in a flurry from behind you.
Your head shifted to your right. Two glaring beams blinding your sight.
Getting closer…
…
The tug on your forearm was violent. You felt your shoulder ricochet in the movement, making you squint from the pain, and the light of the vehicle.
A horn sounded loud in your ears, being one of the few sounds that made it past the rain. The speed of the pull had sent you stumbling. You tripped a few steps and landed in arms.
The car lights were now perpendicular, speeding past you to the left down the road, horn still sounding. You just followed the red rear lights as the car became a spec in the distance, moving round a gentle corner. You said nothing. And no other sound was made.
Your heart pulsed and you felt it through your body, from your chest to your stomach to the intensity in your neck. You lied there, still in arms, staring at the distant road, and gave a deep dry swallow. Your eyes searched over the road, from where your footsteps were, to where you’d stumbled.
Your support system shuddered slightly, and your face turned to your right.
Felix.
His eyes like he’d witnessed a murder.
You’d almost ended it all. And felix had saved you.
You stared at him, mouth slightly open, before his face crumbled. And his arms too. All strength suddenly left his body but he still let you down gently.
You knelt your bare knees on the wet ground, and collapsed onto all fours. You just focused on breathing and getting your head back working. Felix sat on his feet, knees already soaked from the floor.
Just staring at you. Completely dazed, hands neatly on his lap.
After a long minute in the rain, you looked up at him from your position on the ground. Something about you looking up at him turned his face to fear, as if something else was going to happen too.
He reached his hand to your cheek. It was just the brush of a fingertip, and then after a second, a cup for your cheek to sit in as an offering.
His hand was perfectly shaped and you focused into his eyes. Your brow quivered, and your head eventually leant into his cup.
For support, but also as an acknowledgement.
You stared at the ground for a millisecond, still processing the lights and the horn. And the tug on your arm.
It replayed in your head once, and you bolted your gaze back to his, as if the replay had reminded you of something you’d forgotten.
You stared at each other’s eyes a moment longer, before he launched to hug you.
It was tight round your torso, and you reciprocated immediately. You buried your face into his neck, tears in your eyes again. You hugged him back so hard he flinched slightly as your fingers dug into his back.
You sobbed into his shoulder and he brought his right hand to your head.
He’d almost lost you.
You held each other for so long. The umbrella bounced around in the near distance alone and abandoned.
You heard a whimper from felix before he took your shoulders in his hands.
“P-..Princess?... are you ok, angel…?”
Tears covered his eyes and shimmered in the sideways light of the trafficlight.
You looked to his eyes but couldn’t respond directly. You stared at his chest as you nodded faintly.
He left a long kiss on your forehead and pulled you into another equally tight hug.
“Fuck…”
–
Both of your knees were soaked and bruising from the way you’d been sitting, and for that long too. Neither of you could really feel it though, still. All your bodies needed was physical evidence you were both there.
The scene replayed in your mind again.
You shook your head and clenched your eyes shut.
“I’m sorry, lixie”, you whined, the first words in what seemed like a year of silence.
“Don’t apologise… don’t ever apologise”. His response was a reflex but still soft. He pulled you from him to kiss your forehead and immediately envelope you back in his arms.
“No… I should’ve looked and I was stupid and careless… I’m sorry”
It was honest words and you began to sob again. You didn’t want to leave his arms for fear of… well everything.
“Listen to me”, he started, pulling your face between his hands. His grip was still strong, and your cheeks smushed.
He hesitated as he actually looked into your eyes before speaking. He was nervous to speak but you could tell he needed to anyways.
“The whole reason we’re here is because of me”
You winced at his words. It was true, in a sense, but you refused to think any of it was his fault anymore.
“... because of me and…”
He began to stumble and broke eye contact. Your hand instinctively gravitated to hold his hand on your cheek without a thought.
“Felix…”. His eyes were immediately on yours again, hanging on your every word.
“I… wanted to know why you yelled at me… but…”
He blurted before you could get your mind around your next thought,
“I’m so so sorry princess something came up earlier…
“And something's been happening the last few weeks…”. You could see the pain of reflection in his eyes. It was something awful.
“And I shouldn’t have kept it from you,” he melted into a deeper sob, “I was trying to be strong…”
You always shared with each other if you were feeling bad, and now you could see the tinge of guilt in his eye. That he hadn’t told you sooner. That unreadable face from the kitchen you’d now decoded. The pieces began to fall together.
“or taken it out on you… it’s- it’s.. not fair on you…”
“You don’t h- have to–...”
You covered his quivering lips with two of your fingers, your brow collapsed as tears filled your eyes.
“Felix, I–...”
You left a moment of silence. He didn't interrupt this time, and hung onto your silence. In reality, you didn’t know what to say.
The memory came back to you, but the sound of the car and the memory of his voice blurred into one.
“I love you, felix… and I just…”
He flinched hard at the words. He was caressing your cheek with his thumb and a tilted head and stopped instantly. A tear rolled from his cheek to the ground, and one fell from yours into his thumb.
“I want to be a shoulder for you to lean on… to be able to help you out of whatever shit you’re going through, just–...”
You looked down and muttered the rest,
“Just promise me you won’t speak like that again…”
A lot, a lot, didn’t matter to you anymore. You’d need to rebuild with him, but this was the key to it. Felix melted at your words.
He took two fingers to tilt your head back up to his, but all he could do was cry.
He choked and hugged you tight, again, sniffling into your shoulder.
The next eruptions from his mouth were a jumbled, unintelligible mess, just like you’d been earlier.
“I’ll never do it again I promise”
“I’ll never forgive myself, my princess…”
“If you can find it in your heart to give me just one chance…”
“I promise I’ll make it up to you, I swear angel I will”
After so long of speaking, his words turned more and more inaudible.
This time, you took his head from your shoulder and placed a long kiss on the side of his cheek, just by his shaking and muttering lips.
To be totally honest, you already started to feel like he’d shown you what you really were to him. Past the explosion and the pent up emotion.
It would all take time, but you were already there.
felix is the sunshine you never thought you needed in your life! he came into your life so unexpectedly and before you knew it, you had fallen head over heels for him. little did you know that he felt the exact same way about you but was too shy to say anything.
over time, his anxiety about the whole situation had grown to be too much for him and it was practically consuming him. he knew he would have to come clean eventually, but he had no idea how to do it without guidance from the boys, especially chan.
when he does end up asking you out, he does in in the most simple yet romantic way possible before he has time to overthink it anymore than he already has. you obviously say yes to the date and the relief that washes over felix feels liberating
felix is the literal textbook definition of a gentleman no matter what stage of the relationship you guys are in. this man moves mountains for you even when its unprompted. expect him to hold and open every single door for you, cook for you, and surprise you with lavish gifts.
felix is genuinely the most attentive person you’ve ever met in your life. he never fails to remember every single detail about yourself, which makes your heart flutter in response. to him, its the bare minimum, but it means the world to you because you’ve never had a person care about you like that to the point where you feel so seen.
when it comes to giving love, felix can’t pick just one love language because you deserve to feel his love in every way possible. i mean after all, this man sees you as a literal godsend and will make it known. however, his top three love languages are quality time, physical touch, and acts of service in no particular order.
now when it comes to receiving love, his favorite love languages are acts of service and physical touch. just like a koala, he will practically cling to you if given the chance and will not let go of you (not that you would want him to anyway). bonus points if you kiss him literally anywhere because he will practically MELT into you. as for acts of service, it’s a way of letting him relax and not having to worry about anything after a stressful day of rehearsals and business meetings. no matter how big or small the gesture is, it manages to brighten up his entire day.
he is a FIEND for pda but we all know this! more often than not, you find yourselves interlocking hands as the two of you run errands. there’s even times where he wraps his arm around your waist especially if there’s a whole mob of paparazzi trying to ruin your guys’ day in the process.
whenever a disagreement arises between the two of you, felix makes sure to never raise his voice at you no matter what. sure, he might be frustrated, but he would never forgive himself if he ever made it worse. he absolutely hates conflict and always tries to make it up to you in any way possible because he hates the thought of doing anything to hurt you even if its on accident.
felix loves the fact you take part in his hobbies just for him even if its in an indirect way. sometimes you watch him play his video games while you’re just sitting on the bed, admiring how locked in he is. sometimes, you can’t help but stifle a giggle out of adoration whenever he slightly rages at the game he’s playing.
traveling the world together is the best thing ever! sure, felix has gone to many countries before, but he always has more fun when he gets to explore it with you. another plus is that he’s practically your tour guide and can show you all of the hidden gems in each country without worrying about the flocks of tourists swarming the area
leave it to him to send you the most UNHINGED tiktoks and reels that pop up on his feed. most of it is brain rot or current trends, but it still makes you smile because its a part of your guys’ unwritten routine and you wouldn’t trade it for anything. heck, there’s even designated tiktok time even when the two of you are unwinding in bed together.
we all know this man has so many pet names for you and we love to see it! the most common pet names he drops are angel, love, sweetheart, and darling. to anyone else, it might seem like overkill, but it always forms butterflies in your stomach. i mean how could it not when he has the most beautiful voice ever whenever he uses terms of endearment like that?
his camera roll is FLOODED with pictures of you to the point where he has an entire album dedicated to you and your guys’ relationship. whenever he’s away from you, he always looks at his favorite pictures of you to remind himself that this is worth it and always will be.
felix is the type of person to try to hide his emotions and try to not wear them on his sleeve, but you know him well enough to know that it’s just a front. he always tries to put other peoples needs above his own, but sometimes it gets to be too much to the point where he breaks down in front of you after keeping his emotions bottled up for so long. felix constantly apologizes while crying in your arms to which you reassure him that he has absolutely nothing to be sorry for. sometimes all he needs is to have someone listen to him without being judged and thats exactly what you do until he feels better
when the roles are reversed, he makes sure to do the same for you even if its about something completely out of either of your guys’ control. its the least he could do after all you’ve done for him, but it always breaks his heart to see you in that state and will do anything to help you even if its in a small way.
You couldn’t help but notice the way Felix’s muscles flexed as he dug into the sand. He looked identical to Berry, Christopher’s dog, as Felix used his hands next to Berry’s paws to scoop out handfuls of sand haphazardly. The wind blew then, the clouds of sand in the air headed straight towards you. You covered your eyes with your own hand from the sun before, but now it was to avoid getting sand in your eyes as you called out to Felix, scolding him lightly as you groaned, “Felix! What are you doing?”
Felix looked up at you, completely oblivious to the fact that sand was blowing your way. You were leaning up on your elbows on a yellow beach towel he set out for you, your skin shining with sunscreen. He smiled sheepishly, knowing then what he had done wrong, but also revelling in how gorgeous you looked sun-kissed and annoyed in front of him.
However, the bass in his laughter, followed by his voice, melted your frustration as he responded, “I’m sorry, babe. I’m looking for sand crabs with Berry. Are you okay?”
“Well, I can still see, so that has to count for something,” You grumbled as Felix tried to hide behind a fit of laughter as his lips pressed together.
“Oh, come on, Y/N. The sand crabs will do more damage to you then Felix ever could with sand,” Christopher defended his best friend as he leaned over Felix’s shoulder to look at you, intruding into the conversation purposely, “Speaking of crabs, did you guys want anything from the car? I was going to run back for the cooler.”
“I’m good, mate, thank you though,” Felix answered as he continued digging. Christopher stood up, making his way past you.
“I’m good, too, thanks,” You smiled brightly up at Chris as he walked away.
“Alright, I’ll be back. Oh, I’ll grab my speaker, too!”
“Oh, thank god! I love you, Chris!” You shouted enthusiastically behind you.
You’re excited then to listen to music when Chris comes back with the food and music speaker. The three of you had ventured out to a quiet part of the Australian coast where the small hike through the treeline and brush deterred other beachgoers from joining you. The adventure was a break for all of you that day after a hard work week in your respective fields. Christopher, Felix’s best friend, offered the beach plans last minute to give Berry some time to play, too.
“Come on, Berry! Come on!” Christopher called out to Berry, his dog, whose head snapped towards him. She didn’t move until Chris shouted her name again, bounding over in excited strides to follow her brother on whatever adventure he was going on.
“What about me?” Felix’s bottom lip was pushed out in a pout as Chris and Berry walked towards the treeline, “I’m your boyfriend.”
“And because you’re my boyfriend, I will always love you,” You responded sweetly before bitterly adding, “Even though you threw sand in my eyes.”
“Here, let me make it better then,” Felix crawled his way to you, leaving the hole he dug with Berry behind, and leaned over you as he pressed quick kisses to your forehead. He kissed your eyelids next as you squinted them closed against his attack, “There. Is the sand gone?”
“Mmm… I don’t think so,” You teased. Felix’s head tilted to the side in question as you smiled mischievously.
“I think I have sand right… here,” Your voice enunciated every word as you used your thumb to pull Felix’s bottom lip down slightly before pulling him toward you into a kiss.
Felix responded immediately, laying you fully back on the beach towel now as your arms wrapped around him, your hands sifting through his sun-blonde hair. He tasted faintly of mint from the gum he was chewing earlier on the ride to the beach, and he smelled like the sunblock he put on his face. You melted into him as if he were the sun himself, arching into his touch as he tilted your head to gain better access to your neck as his lips trailed down your jaw.
“Felix, Chris could be back any moment,” You whispered, tilting your head to see Chris and Berry nowhere in sight. You knew exactly what Felix was headed towards with his antics as his lips trailed back up towards your ear. Your hands moved to his biceps in warning before you let your body take over your logic. But were you really going to push him away?
“He just walked away, babe. I’ll make it quick… hmm?”
…You were absolutely not going to push him away.
Heat immediately pooled between your legs as you gave in. Felix’s hand grazed your cheek, trailing it down your neck, and right towards your navel as his thumb caressed over the skin as he gripped your waist. The sun that beamed down on the both of you was no match for the heat between you two as Felix continued, his hand reaching the waistband of your bikini bottom in one practiced motion.
“You’re always so needy for me, huh?” Felix’s voice is laced with sin as he whispers right into your ear. His teeth nipped at your earlobe, sending another wave of arousal through you as he added smoothly, “Even if I get sand in your face?”
“Shut up,” You quipped, lifting your hips in response to Felix’s touch as he tugged your bikini bottom down, exposing you completely to him as he shifted his body between your legs. Felix smiled into another kiss before dipping his tongue into your mouth, his tongue hot and wet as it slid against yours. His half-grown erection sprung free from his swim trunks as he adjusted them down before grinding against your folds, a moan escaping your lips as you coated him in your arousal. The moment was heated, needy, and quick as Felix lined himself up before pushing himself inside of you.
Felix’s head dropped down to the dip in your collarbone then as heat consumed you both, a quiet moan slipped from your lips right next to his ear as a groan vibrated against your shoulder. You could feel him pulse inside of you in response before his hips started thrusting into yours. Your legs wrapped around him instinctively, pulling him deeper as you both whined in response to the stretch as he grew fully inside of you.
“Fuck, Y/N,” Felix whispered against your neck as the sounds of your skin connecting softly echoed between you, “You feel so fucking good, beautiful. You’re so good for me.”
Felix angled himself to hit that sweet spot inside of you with every thrust. His movements were quick and precise as your head hit the beach towel, your mouth fell open in pleasure as your moans threatened to escape. One of Felix’s hands found your mouth, covering it to keep your moans quiet. The coil built quickly inside of you as your hands fisted into his hair for stability as you pant desperately into his hand.
“Felix- I’m so c-close,” Your voice was muffled behind his hand as Felix ground his hips deep into you, the friction against your clit sent your eyes rolling to the back of your head.
“I know, baby. You can let go for me,” Felix cooed into your ear as the coil in you snapped only a moment after. Your walls fluttered around him as your orgasm hit you hard, your toes curling as your heels dug into the fabric of the beach towel as your back bowed with pleasure. Felix bit his lip to hold back a moan as he thrusted a few more times before he spilled hot and heavy inside of you. The both of you panted heavily as your lower back met the towel again as Felix hovered over you breathless.
Quicker than you liked, Felix pulled himself out of you quickly as he adjusted your bikini bottom back over your waist. He adjusted himself back into his swim trunks before he kissed you gently. Both of your faces were more than sun-kissed, they were flushed, and parts of your hair were covered in sand from spilling out around your head.
“Are you okay?” Felix asked you gently before he kissed you a second time.
“I’m good,” You smiled, lazy and content before you pulled Felix into one last kiss as he laid next to you, pulling you into him as he played with your hair.
“I love you, Y/N.”
“I love you, Felix.”
“God, can you guys please get a room?” Christopher yelled from a distance as he walked onto the sandy coast right on cue as Berry tumbled ahead of him. You looked up to see a big smile on Chris’ face clearly joking as he continued walking. However, you noticed that Berry was headed straight for you as you noticed she wasn’t slowing down. You squeal as Berry crashes into you, pushing you back into Felix as his arm wraps around you to hold you steady.
“Berry! It wasn’t even that long, oh my god!” You yelped helplessly. Felix laughed as he watched Berry run between you and Felix then as she hopped off you, excited to reunite with her friends. Felix crawled back over to the hole him and Berry were digging, patting his lap to call her back over.
“Berry! Down!” Chris commanded uselessly before setting the cooler and speaker down in front of Felix, “I brought everything we packed. Food and drinks are in the cooler, I grabbed an extra towel for Berry, and the speaker is fully charged and ready to go.”
“Perfect,” You responded as you adjusted yourself on the towel with a sigh, closing your eyes as the sun warmed your skin instead of your boyfriend, “You always come in clutch, Chris.”
“I try,” Chris laughed as he turned on the speaker, connecting it to his phone. He looked up at you then, searching your face for a response to the music he was playing.
Chris’ eyebrows furrowed instead with confusion as he noticed your overly flushed face. A mischievous smile played on your lips as your eyes remained closed, but the tell all that Chris picked up on was you adjusting your bikini bottom as he turned to look away from you. He glanced over at Felix then, noting the same flushed color in his cheeks. Everything clicked when Felix looked up at him, hair messy compared to the kempt way Felix maintained it.
“No way,” Christopher scoffs playfully as his shoulders slump in realization then, his hands resting on his hips as he looks between you both like an angry father. He’s met with two confused looks as he asked, “You could not last two hours without being on each other?”
“It would’ve been two hours if you weren’t here,” Felix quipped plainly before digging back into the sand again. Your face flushed before rolling over onto your stomach in embarrassment, hiding your face in your elbows with a defeated groan.
Afternote: This is my first post ever, and I hope you enjoyed! I'm really excited and nervous to see where this goes...
Author's Note: It's been awhile, but here's something I finally wanted to put out in the world from my huge list of drafts! Enjoy.
Felix’s body laid on top of yours as you sprawled out on the couch underneath him. The side of his head was pressed into your abdomen as you played with his hair lightly, the heat of his body acting as your personal blanket. Earlier in the day, Felix had mentioned a show he’d seen that you told him you’d never watched before. Now here you both were, cuddled on top of each other as Felix used it as an excuse to watch the show all over again with you.
One episode played after another, and the later hours of the night ticked away peacefully. You were fully invested in the plotline, gentle gasps leaving your body at the suspense building in the storyline. Felix couldn’t help but focus his attention on you instead as his mind drifted from the screen.
He watched as your eyes darted around the screen as you took in one scene after another, and he especially loved the way your lips parted with shock as the story unfolded in front of you. Felix couldn’t help but need to be the reason you made those gasps instead. He came up with a plan right there as he saw your jaw tighten, and he knew then to make his move.
Since he’d already seen the show so many times, he tuned out of it as he pressed a gentle kiss over the loose fabric of your pajamas covering your abdomen. He noticed your hand respond absent-mindedly in his hair, your attention occupied on the screen. It only spurred Felix on as he slowly crawled down your lower body carefully as he tried not to distract you.
Delicately, he laid down in front of you as his face met your intimate area. Your pajama shorts blocked his way as he left gentle kisses on your inner thighs instead. The kisses broke you out of your spell a moment later, and you looked down to see Felix in the most intimate position... his favorite position, to be exact. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion, not sure if what he was implying was really happening until you called his name.
“Felix-“
“Lift your hips and pay attention to the show.”
His voice dropped an octave, the sound pure sin, and it answered the questions running through your mind the moment you spoke to him. Lifting your hips without hesitation, Felix pulled the waistband of your shorts down and off of you as he exposed yourself to him. Instead of going straight for you, however, he kissed all over your thighs as you turned away from him to watch the screen. You tried your best to keep your attention on the show in front of you tried to appease Felix.
Felix was enjoying every moment, looking up at you from his new angle as you tried your best to stay focused on the show. He smiled to himself then, and mentally noted he’d be buried between your legs every show you watched together from now on. For each kiss he left on your thighs, he could feel the heat build between your legs, and soon enough you were glistening under his touch. He knew then that you were ready, and his mouth salivated as he shifted to taste you.
You tried to watch the show, you really did, but when Felix’s tongue slowly parted your pussy, you were gone. A moan slipped out of you as you turned to him, but the moment you turned back to face him he stopped and retracted his tongue. You whined in confusion, and Felix only flashed a devilish smile. There was no way he could be this serious about watching his show right now, could he?
“Don’t watch me, babe. If you don’t watch the show, I’ll stop.”
There was certainly no way you wanted him to stop now, so you turned your head back to the screen in front of you. When you managed to focus on following along with the plot of the show again, Felix broke you out of your thoughts as his tongue parted you again. Your hands went down to grip Felix’s hair, and your back arched as you kept your face glued towards the television ahead of you.
Felix hummed then, perfectly content as he ate you out while you watched the show he picked out. His tongue swirled around your clit lazily, taking his time as he traced absent patterns over it as he savored your taste. He could tell you were desperate now, your breathing ragged as you spiraled with pleasure, and small gasps escaped with each flick Felix gave you. You were making the exact sounds he wanted to hear from you, and when he figured out how you kept making them, his movements became relentless.
Your attention span melted away as your body tensed with the pleasure Felix gave you, circling his tongue in a pattern that had your eyes threatening to roll back. The show was nothing but a distant thought as you focused on grinding your hips into his face as you chased your high on his tongue. Felix’s fingers dug into your hips to steady you, and he shook his tongue back and forth on your clit as you cried out from the pressure. Your head dipped back, eyes closing, and your moans kept growing louder and louder as you felt your climax approaching quickly.
“F-Felix!” Tightening your grip in his hair, you body locked up as your orgasm reached its peak, and a second later your walls fluttered around nothing as your orgasm pulsed through you. Felix’s fingers moved soothingly over your thighs as you melted into the couch. He used his tongue to clean your aftermath gently. He paused to take in your body next, dazzled by your beauty as your attention remained on the television, and he practically melted as you sighed happily.
“Enjoying the show so far?” Felix teased and your face flushed as you turned to face him, still between your legs. The look you gave him then told him you knew he was fucking around with that question, and he only chuckled in response. He kissed your thighs as he noticed your legs buzzing from the aftershocks of your orgasm and his ego inflated knowing it was because of him. You leaned back as he kissed the delicate skin between your thighs, turning back to the screen contently as Felix took care of you.
But when you thought that was all, you were rudely interrupted from the storyline by Felix’s tongue slipping right inside of you instead.
You almost choked on air as you took a sharp breath of air, hands flying into his hair as your legs locked around his head in an instant. The pleasure was too much with the short break he gave you, but your body craved it as your high built all over again. At this point, you didn’t care about the show as your back arched off the couch. Felix’s tongue set a steady pace, and the same noises he loved hearing from you were all he heard from between your legs.
His cock ached in the best way just knowing he was the reason you felt so good. When you climaxed a second time, he licked and sucked every drop from you like you were ice cream melting onto his fingers. When he was satisfied, he trailed kisses up your body as he moved away from between your legs. He drifted up to your neck as he sucked on a spot that had you whining softly into his hair.
“Watch the show, baby,” Felix scolded as he turned your head towards the screen with his fingers, “You’re missing my favorite part.”
“It’d be easier if I didn’t have someone distracting me!” You protest, and Felix only hummed passively as he nuzzled back into you. His fingers dug into your exposed hip as he felt your skin, hot under his touch, and he couldn’t help himself when he trailed his fingers further below.
Just one more time. He tells himself as he circles his finger on your clit delicately.
contains: +18, felix is maddening gentle, shower sex, soft sex, unprotected sex (don’t), breeding, no rush, mutual fingering (f. receiving), oral (f. receiving), masturbation (f.), lots of praise, reader guides felix
authors note: english is not my first language so I apologize for any mistakes in advance +++ requests are open! :)
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summary: it was supposed to be just another morning shower. but then, Felix sneaked in.
!!!! MINORS DO NOT INTERACT !!!
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The warm water of the shower ran against your scalp, bubbles slipping through your hair as you worked the shampoo in slow, sleepy circles. Morning light spilled through the window.
Then, click.
The bathroom door opened with a quiet sound, and you knew it was him.
Felix stepped into the steam like he belonged there. His bare feet padded softly on the tiles until you felt him behind you, the heat of his body sinking into your skin before he even touched you.
Then, his hands. Smooth and sure, sliding around your waist, resting there with quiet intent.
“Keep washing,” he whispered, his voice low and rough from sleep. “Don’t mind me.”
You swallowed, heartbeat picking up as his palms drifted lower, slowly. Over your hips, then your thighs, pressing, gripping, pulling you back into him until your body met his, slick skin against skin.
You faltered, fingers still tangled in your hair.
“I said keep washing,” Felix murmured near your ear, his tone playful but edged with something darker, his voice deep. His lips brushed your shoulder as his grip tightened, holding you close. “I just wanted to feel you.”
You tried to keep your hands moving, fingers massaging the shampoo into your scalp like he told you to, but it was already getting harder to focus. Not with Felix’s chest pressed to your back, his breath warm against your neck, his fingers skimming lower every few seconds like he was testing how long you'd last.
“I woke up and you weren’t there,” he murmured, lips ghosting over your ear. “Didn’t like that.”
“I didn’t want to wake you,” you said, voice catching as his hands gripped your thighs again, gentle, but claiming.
He hummed, not convinced. “Should’ve woken me,” he whispered. “Could’ve started the day just like this, hugging you.”
His hands slid up, gliding over slick skin, fingers splaying over your stomach as he pulled you tighter against him. You felt him now, hard and aching where he pressed into you. And still, he didn’t ask for more. He just held you there, mouth exploring the curve of your neck like he had all the time in the world.
“God, you feel good,” he breathed.
Your breathing stuttered, shampoo dripping from your fingertips as your arms lowered slightly, too distracted to finish. He noticed.
“Baby,” he whispered again, his voice so deep it gave you chills all over your body, lips brushing your skin with every word, “keep washing.”
You obeyed, shakily bringing your hands back to your hair. He didn’t move away. Didn’t let you escape his hold. One palm stayed pressed to your stomach while the other slid lower, slow and lazy.
He kissed beneath your ear, then dragged his lips lightly across your shoulder. “Don’t worry, angel. I’ll take care of you when you’re done.”
A low chuckle vibrated against your spine as he kissed between your shoulder blades. “Let me help” he murmured, his fingers brushing yours. He reached up, gently easing your hands away from your hair. “Relax,” he whispered. “I’ve got you.”
You let him guide you, arms dropping to your sides as you leaned into his chest, head tilting back just enough to give him room. The water kept running, warm and steady, and he stepped closer, his body flush fully against yours, one arm wrapped securely around your waist.
With the other, he worked the remaining shampoo through your hair, his fingers slow, firm, tender.
He massaged your scalp like he had done it a hundred times, it was just a Felix thing. He loved massaging you every time he could. The pads of his fingers dug in just right, tracing through the strands, curling around them gently as he whispered soft things against your ear.
“So pretty like this,” he murmured. “Letting me take care of you. All cute n' quiet.”
You exhaled shakily, eyes fluttering shut. He tilted your head slightly, turning you into the stream of water. His fingers rinsed through your hair with care, guiding the suds away until nothing was left but clean, warm softness.
You turned slowly in his arms, water sliding down your skin as you faced him. Felix let you, his hands still resting at your waist, thumbs tracing circles like he couldn't stop touching you, even for a second.
And then you saw him.
His blonde hair was soaked, darkened by the water and clinging to his forehead in soft strands. Droplets rolled down the sharp lines of his jaw, catching in the hollows of his collarbones, and his freckles, God, his freckles, were scattered like stars across his cheeks and nose, made more vivid by the steam and heat.
He was smiling at you. That smile.
The one that was both boyish and devastating. Soft, sweet, but laced with the kind of hunger that made your knees weak.
“Hi, angel,” he murmured, like it was the first time he was seeing you. His gaze dipped, slow, thorough, taking in every inch of your bare skin, flushed and glistening. “You’re so fucking pretty.”
You swallowed, barely able to breathe.
And he didn’t look away. Didn’t even blink.
He brought one hand up to tuck a strand of wet hair behind your ear, knuckles grazing your cheek. “You always look at me like that,” he whispered, voice thick. “Like you need me.”
You did. And he knew it. You smiled, and nodded. “I do need you”
“You gonna let me take care of you?” he asked, tilting his head.
The way he said it sent a shiver down your spine, heat pooling low in your belly. Still, he didn’t rush. He didn’t press, even though he was hard and wanting, even though his eyes told you exactly what he planned to do.
He waited. Letting you look. Letting you want.
You brought your hands up slowly, resting them on his chest. His skin was warm under your touch, wet and smooth, his heart beating steady beneath your fingertips. He didn’t say anything right away, just looked at you like he always did. Like there was nothing else in the world.
“You always sneak in places like that?” you asked softly, voice barely louder than the water falling around you.
He exhaled a small laugh through his nose, the sound warm, close. “Didn’t want to be away from you any longer.”
You looked up at him, searching his face. His eyes never left yours.
“I didn’t want to wake you,” you said again.
“I know. But I’d rather wake up next to you,” Felix murmured. His hands slid gently up your sides, thumbs brushing your ribs. “Even if it’s just to hold you for a minute longer.”
Your heart pulled at his words. He meant every one of them.
You traced your fingers up to his shoulder, watching the way water beaded along his collarbone. “You’re so beautiful, Lixie” you said before you could stop yourself.
His brows lifted slightly, eyes softening. “You really think that?”
You nodded, swallowing. “It’s unfair, honestly. How good you look like this.”
He leaned in until your foreheads touched, his voice a whisper. “Then look at me. As long as you want.”
You did. You stood there in the water with your fingers still curled against his skin, and you looked at him. The blonde strands stuck to his face. The way his lashes darkened when they were wet. The steady rise and fall of his chest as he breathed, deep and controlled, like he was holding back.
And still, that tension hung between you, unspoken but undeniable. Not rushed. Not demanding. Just there, breath heavy, burning low and steady in the space where his mouth hovered near yours, where his fingers pressed into your skin like he needed to make sure you wouldn’t disappear.
“I want you to touch me,” you whispered. “But let’s go slow, okay?”
Felix looked right into your eyes.
“I could never rush you,” he said. “Not when it’s you. I just want to be with you.”
Felix leaned in, and when he kissed you, it wasn’t frantic or hungry, it was soft, slow, like he was tasting something he had been craving forever. His lips moved against yours with a quiet desperation, not rough, but deep, like he needed the kiss to say everything he felt for you.
When he finally pulled back, his eyes searched yours again, like he was making sure you were still with him, like he needed your permission again, even if you had already given it.
Then, his hands began to move. Slowly. Tenderly.
One hand slipped down the side of your neck, fingers gliding along your collarbone before tracing lower. The other hand stayed at your waist, grounding you, holding you steady as his touch drifted over your chest, reverent and sure. He cupped you with a gentle palm, his thumb brushing across your nipple, barely a touch, more like a whisper.
You gasped, body arching ever so slightly into him.
His eyes never left your face.
“Okay?” he asked, voice thick with restraint.
Your hand moved to his, guiding it, showing him you didn’t want him to stop, didn’t want distance. You wanted him. All of him. Like this.
“Keep going,” you whispered. “Please.”
Felix kissed you again, deeper this time, and his hand moved lower, fingertips sliding down your stomach, slow as sin, until they found the heat between your legs and touched you like he had been waiting for this, and the soft groan he let out into your mouth nearly undid you.
You broke the kiss slowly, lips lingering on his, and brought your hand to his wrist.
“Let me,” you whispered, voice thick and velvety, heavy with the kind of trust that made his chest ache. Something soft. Something grounding.
He stilled under your touch, watching you with eyes wide, lips parted and glistening. You could feel how hard he was breathing, like he was holding back something overwhelming.
Your fingers curled around his, and you guided him lower. You tilted your hips slightly forward, parting your legs, and placed his hand right where you wanted it.
“Right here,” you murmured.
You let his fingers slip through your folds, slow and deliberate, until they were slick with you. You moved them up slightly, pressing the pads of his fingers against your clit.
“Just… light circles,” you said. “No rush.”
He followed your instructions with almost reverent precision. The first swipe was soft, experimental. Then the second. You sucked in a breath as he circled again, adjusting the pressure just enough to make your thighs twitch.
“Like that?” he asked, voice hoarse, his eyes never leaving your face.
“Yeah,” you whispered. “Exactly like that.”
The rhythm built slowly, his fingers gliding over you, teasing, taking little gasps from your lips with every pass. You watched his face as he watched yours, the way his pupils blew wide, his jaw tightening when you rolled your hips toward him, chasing the pressure.
Then, his hand shifted lower, and you didn’t stop him.
He traced down again, dipping his middle finger between your folds until he found your entrance. With a slow, deliberate motion, he pushed in. The stretch was delicious, deep, and warm, and you couldn’t help the way your lips parted on a soft moan.
He froze for a second, like the feel of you around him had knocked the breath out of him.
“God, baby,” he whispered, voice shaking. “You feel so—fuck.”
You took his hand again and guided him deeper, just an inch more, just until he curled his finger slightly and dragged it against that sweet, aching spot inside you.
But then… you brought your own hand down.
Felix’s eyes snapped up to yours as you slid your fingers over the place where his hand was already working you open. You circled your clit a couple times, deliberately, right where he had been a second ago, and his breath caught like you had touched a live wire in him.
You kept your eyes on his when you whispered, “Can I?”
He nodded, frantic and breathless, too full of you to speak.
So you did it, slid one of your fingers in, right alongside his. The fit was tight, snug, and the feeling of both of you inside yourself made you gasp, head falling back. The stretch burned in the sweetest way, your walls fluttering around both of your fingers.
“Holy shit,” he breathed, watching the way your bodies moved together, how his finger and yours sank into you in perfect rhythm.
Your cunt clenched around the both of you like it didn’t know who to hold onto, each glide in and out wetter than the last, messy and filthy and achingly slow.
His hips stuttered forward without thinking, brushing against your thigh, cock twitching where it hung heavy, flushed and leaking. He had to bite his lip hard to hold himself in place, the tip of him leaving a slick smear against your skin.
“Fuck. That’s—” He shook his head like he was dizzy. “How am I supposed to take it slow?”
You smiled, soft and sharp. But you didn’t move faster. Just deeper. You curled both your fingers, yours and his, and dragged them over that tender spot again, pressure delicious, relentless, and his whole body tensed. His jaw clenched. A broken sound left him.
“You like it?” you asked, breathless, half-teasing, half-sincere.
His hand flexed with yours inside you, matching your pressure, your rhythm. You could feel the way his knuckles brushed yours inside your heat, the delicious fullness of it, the tension building with every slow thrust.
His forehead dropped to yours, eyes fluttering closed. “I love it,” he whispered. “You’re… fuck, you’re so hot. So fucking beautiful.”
And you could feel it, how much he meant it. How it wasn’t just about getting you off, but being part of the way you touched yourself. Being allowed to feel what you feel, the way you feel it.
You gasped again, hips rolling down into your joined hands, grinding softly into his palm, and his free hand came up to cradle your cheek. His thumb brushed along your jaw, tender even as his body was trembling, flushed and desperate and aching to bury himself inside you.
And you let him hold you like that, his body flush to yours, your breaths tangled in the mist, fingers slow and deep and warm. Touching together.
Moving as one. Like worship. Like devotion.
Every thrust made you wetter, tighter, slick sounds echoing against the tile. You felt the tension curl in your gut, rising sharp and fast and inevitable.
Your fingers slipped free first, slow and wet, and Felix’s followed right after, like he didn’t want to leave, like your body was trying to keep him in. His hand dragged out with a soft, obscene squelch, both of you breathless, trembling.
The loss made you whimper softly, clenching around nothing, still pulsing, and his mouth was on yours again immediately, stealing the sound, kissing you with something raw, something shaking. His tongue swept in like he needed to taste you deeper, needed to feel the way you felt falling apart.
You felt his hand slide up your back, palm flat and warm, anchoring you, grounding you. His cock still brushed your body, hot and aching, twitching against your skin.
But he didn’t move yet. Just kissed you like he’d never stop. “I wanna have you,” he said against your lips. Voice low. Barely more than breath. “All of you.”
You nodded, not trusting yourself to speak.
He turned you gently, guiding you with careful hands until your front was pressed to the fogged glass of the shower wall. He stepped in behind you, chest against your back, his arm slipping around your waist to pull you flush against him.
The heat of him, his skin, his breath, the way his cock sat heavy and hard against the curve of your ass, made you tremble. But there was no rush in him. Only reverence.
His hand smoothed over your hip, then lower, between your thighs again. This time, he parted you with more certainty, and when he slid his fingers through your folds, you gasped, so open already, so wet. He moaned softly, almost like he was in pain.
He found your clit with the lightest touch, just a soft brush at first, barely there, as if he didn’t want to overwhelm you, though that’s exactly what it did. A shiver ran through your legs, and he smiled against your neck, slow and… wicked.
His fingertips circled lazily, never quite giving you what you needed. Featherlight strokes that teased and taunted, making your hips twitch helplessly back against him. He took his time, dragging the pads of two fingers over the sensitive bundle of nerves, then back down through your folds like he needed to memorize every slick inch of you.
“So soft,” he whispered, mouth brushing your shoulder. “So fucking hot.”
And then he did it again, drawing a tight circle around your clit, then a second one just a little slower, pressing just a little harder, enough to make your breath hitch, your thighs tense.
You reached back blindly, grabbing for his wrist, needing more. But he only chuckled under his breath, not cruel, just reverent.
“I know, angel” he murmured.
He gave you maddening strokes, gentle and slick, circling, then tapping, light flicks that sent sparks up your spine, each one worse than the last. He varied the pressure, rubbing soft and steady for a few moments, then easing up again until you were squirming in place, your hands braced against the glass, chest rising fast.
Your clit throbbed beneath his touch, every nerve on fire, and still he didn’t rush. Still he stayed gentle. Intimate. Like your pleasure was something to savor, not chase.
He pressed a kiss between your shoulder blades as his fingers slipped lower again, gathering more of your slick and bringing it back to your clit. This time he used two fingers, moving in slow, perfect circles that dragged a broken moan from your throat. Your legs trembled again, knees threatening to give, and he wrapped his free arm around your waist to hold you steady.
“I’ve got you,” he whispered, voice deep. “Let me love you like this.” And with every torturously slow stroke, he did. “You’re dripping, baby” he said, voice thick.
You braced yourself against the glass, forehead tipped forward, chest heaving with each breath. “Felix…”
He kissed your shoulder, then trailed lower, slow and reverent kisses down your spine as the steam curled around your bodies. You felt his chest press to your back, one hand firm on your hip, the other caressing down the outside of your thigh.
Then, gently, he pulled back.
“Turn around for me, angel.”
You let him guide you, the slick glide of water between you as he shifted your body. Now you were facing him, his golden skin gleaming wet, hair dripping, eyes soft but hungry. He looked up at you like you were something sacred, something he’d spend lifetimes worshipping. That gaze alone made your knees tremble.
And then he sank into his knees.
Mouth parting. Hands sliding to your thighs again, thumbs stroking the insides slowly before spreading you just enough.
He leaned in, nose brushing you, and pressed an open-mouthed kiss against your heat. A low hum vibrated from his chest as his tongue slipped out, slow and deliberate, tasting you from bottom to top. He licked through your folds again and again, soft, teasing strokes at first, savoring every second. Then deeper, flattening his tongue, dragging it up with pressure before swirling softly around your clit.
His fingers held your thighs steady as he mouthed at your entrance, tongue dipping in shallowly, then deeper, groaning like he couldn’t get enough. He alternated between sucking gently on your clit and flicking it with the tip of his tongue, lazy, wet circles and slow deliberate strokes, like he was trying to memorize every reaction.
When your body twitched, when your breath stuttered, he moaned into you again, needy and in awe. “That’s it,” he murmured against your skin, breath warm and reverent. “So fucking sweet, angel… keep looking at me.”
His mouth was all over you. Hot and slow and impossibly gentle, his tongue traced over you, licking through your folds, tasting you with quiet desperation. His fingers pressed softly against your clit as he mouthed at your entrance, groaning low when he felt the way your body pulsed, already clenching around nothing.
“Oh my God—” you gasped, hips rolling back into his face.
“Shhh,” he breathed, lips brushing your skin. “I’ve got you.”
He licked you again, flat, slow, from the base to your clit, then flicked softly right where you needed it. His hands kept your thighs steady, his mouth never leaving you, not even when your knees started to shake. You reached back, threading one hand into his wet hair, needing to anchor yourself somehow, and he moaned against you at the touch.
When he pulled away, lips swollen, cheeks flushed, he pressed a kiss to your thigh and stood, his body sliding up yours, chest against yours, cock hot and hard against your stomach.
“You want more?” he whispered, lips against your ear.
You nodded, breathless. “I want all of you.”
He groaned, low and ruined, and his hands moved to your hips, guiding you gently. One hand reached down between your thighs again, fingers sliding through your slick before wrapping around himself. He stroked once, twice, then nudged the head of his cock against your entrance.
“Nice and slow,” he whispered, kissing your neck. “You tell me when.”
You reached back and held his hip, grounding him. “Now, Lixie. Please, now.”
He lifted one of your legs up, wrapping around his waist, holding your thigh. Then, he pushed in, slow, deep, inch by inch. The stretch stole the breath from your lungs, your eyes fluttering closed as your body adjusted around him. You felt everything. Every ridge. Every twitch. His quiet, trembling curse against your skin when he was finally buried to the hilt.
You both stayed like that for a moment. Not moving. Just breathing.
Then he pulled back, just an inch, then sank in again, deeper, angling his hips until the sound that left your lips was half a cry.
“There,” you said, nails digging into his thigh. “Just like that.”
And that’s exactly what he gave you. Slow, full thrusts. A rhythm that made the whole world blur. His hands on your waist, your back arched against the glass, the water cascading down your bodies like a veil. And his voice, murmuring how tight you were, how beautiful, how good it felt to be inside you like this.
He kept that rhythm, slow, unrelenting, hips rolling against yours with aching precision, each thrust angled just right, like he was memorizing the way your body tightened around him. You pressed your palms to the glass, forehead tipped forward, mouth open with each breath.
“Feel good, angel?” he asked, voice rasping right against your ear, the sound of it broken, tender.
You nodded, too lost in it to speak, and reached back again, curling your arm around his neck to pull him closer. You felt his chest press flush to your back, felt his breath shaking against your skin.
“Felix—” you gasped. “I-I’m close.”
He moaned at that, deep and wrecked, as he watched your hand slip down your stomach, between your thighs, finding your clit without hesitation. Your touch was firm, circling with purpose now, synced with the slow thrusts of his hips.
“Yeah baby, I want you to come with me,” he whispered, kissing your shoulder, your neck, right below your ear. “Wanna feel you fall apart with me.”
You nodded, whimpering as your body clenched around him again.
His hips stuttered. He was close too, you could feel it in the way he started to tremble against you, the way his breath hitched every time you pulsed around him. Your fingers never faltered, rubbing soft, tight circles over your clit in perfect rhythm.
“I’ve got you,” he said, voice cracking. “Let go. Come with me, baby. Please.”
And then it hit.
You gasped, one hand slamming against the glass, the other gripping his forearm where it held you steady. Your whole body tightened, back arching, hips jerking against him as you shattered with a cry of his name.
The second your body clenched down hard around him, Felix cursed, sharp and breathless, and his hips bucked forward once, twice more before he spilled into you, buried deep. He held you so tight, chest against yours, his mouth at your neck, shaking with the force of it.
For a long moment, neither of you moved. Just the sound of the water falling, and your heartbeats trying to calm in tandem. His fingers still rested between your legs, now still, holding you gently through the aftershocks. Your bodies were slick with sweat and steam and everything you’d just shared.
Felix pressed a kiss to your shoulder. Then your neck. Then just held you close, breathing against your skin.
“You’re everything,” he whispered again.
And you smiled, eyes fluttering closed.
“So are you.”
Your legs were still shaking when Felix slid out of you, gently, one arm wrapping around your waist to steady you. You leaned back into him, letting him hold your weight, both of you breathing hard, skin flushed and slick, hearts still racing under the sound of the water.
His nose brushed below your ear, and then he pressed the softest kiss to the side of your neck. Barely there. Just his lips, warm, careful, lingering like a thank-you whispered into your skin.
You met his gaze. His hair was wet and clinging to his forehead, cheeks pink from the heat, mouth a little swollen, but he looked at you like you were the only thing in the world.
“C’mere,” you murmured, holding him in your arms. He let you move, hands still holding your waist as he leaned in and kissed you again.
Full of softness. Lips sliding against yours slowly, over and over, like he wanted to relearn the shape of your mouth in this quiet moment. You cupped his face, fingers brushing the line of his jaw, and he smiled into the kiss like it was instinct.
You kissed him again, slower. Let it linger.
He chuckled softly, still dazed. Then he leaned around you, hand reaching toward the fogged-up glass behind your shoulder. You watched, heart swelling, as he used one fingertip to draw something small in the steam.
A heart.
Then another. Then another.
Tiny, uneven, scribbled with love.
You smiled.
“Whats that?” you asked, grinning.
He looked at you, that boyish sparkle in his eyes. “All for you.”
Your chest fluttered. You leaned up and kissed him again, slower than before, your arms wrapping around his neck this time.
“I love them,” you said.
“I love you,” he whispered, voice soft but steady.
You stared at him for a second, stunned by how simple and sure he sounded.
Then your smile turned into something quieter, more real. You kissed the corner of his mouth, then his cheek, then over his heart.
“I love you too.”
And neither of you moved to rinse off just yet. You stayed like that, held, warm, hearts drawn in fog, wrapped up in each other, letting the moment stretch.
Letting it mean everything.
-
+++ authors note: omg hi. I took my time finishing this one. I don’t know exactly why… but this one felt so precious. hope u enjoy this as much as I do. MISS YOU, BYE!
synopsis: You’re good at keeping a straight face, and you were so close to winning the game. then comes Felix, and his filthy mouth.
tags: fem!idol!reader, no smut but extremely suggestive it might as well be, 3rd person pov/use of y/n, mention of reader being an actor in the past, heavy dirty talk (there were times i snapped out of my writing and cringed at myself 💀), i literally don’t know what else to tag this it’s just straight sex talk. reader is said to be in XG (but i don’t name any real XG members. its just a placeholder), black/tan skinned reader
a/n: it literally took like 15 minutes just to figure out what those damn cat ears things were called. this story is straight bs trust me ik. if this happened irl they would both prob get FLAMED but that’s what makes fanfiction so great. also if the dirty talk sucks please don’t shame me i tried my best 😭🙏
Y/N sat at the small table in the center of the stage, the heavy headphones clamped over her ears as loud music blasted to drown out the noise of the venue.
The crowd was packed off the stage to the right of her, giving them a clear view of the side of her face as she danced slightly, vibing to the song playing in her ears. In front of her sat two mic stands atop the table where the idols were meant to place their microphones when it was their turn to sit.
One stand held a mic and was facing Y/N directly, while the other faced the empty seat that her XG bandmate Min.A had just occupied before running off to conspire with the rest of the idols.
Min.A hurried back to the far side of the stage where the MC and the other groups were seated behind Y/N, quickly plotting her next move to save the game.
The goal of the Nekomimi cat ear game was difficult: get the opponent flustered or hyper enough that the motorized cat ears moved consecutively for 10 seconds, with only a 5-minute time limit to achieve it.
So far, Min.A had completely failed to make Y/N’s ears budge. She nearly forgotten just how good Y/N’s composure could be given her years as an actor and an idol.
“Given up?” the MC asked, trying to provoke a reaction from the XG member to keep the energy up.
Min.A didn’t hesitate, pulling out the Veto Card from her hoodie pocket. The one she had traded with her fellow member Jiyeon a few games earlier.
It wasn’t a standard veto card specifically, it was a 'phone a friend' wildcard that allowed external help with a mission. She held the card high in the air, looked directly at the MC, and brought her microphone to her mouth. “Can I phone a friend?”
The MC nodded instantly. Despite knowing all along that the two had swapped cards and she wanted to see exactly how this chaotic turn of events would play out on stage.
The crowd collectively ’oohed’ and began cheering, though most of the stadium laughed knowingly as Min.A immediately made a beeline over to where Felix was watching quietly from his stool.
She gestured for him to turn in, and he complied, turning his head so that he faced the massive big screen rather than the crowd of fans.
He left his microphone resting in his lap while Min.A hid her own hand behind her back. Making sure Felix could freely respond without the mics picking up audio, or anyone reading lips.
“Please, Felix. I need this,” Min.A pleaded quietly in his ear, causing Felix to laugh quietly at her desperation.
“You can do anything or say anything you want to her, you’ll probably have the best chance out of anyone here.”
“I don’t know, she’s too good at keeping her composure..” Felix mumbled back, looking over at his girlfriend's back. “What do I even say?”
“You can say literally anything, man. Doesn’t matter how explicit, just say anything. I need to beat Y/N or I’ll be in debt to her forever,” Min.A exaggerated.
It was no secret to anyone around the her that Min.A was wildly competitive. And out of all the XG members, she and Y/N ranked the highest for their playful, but intense competitiveness toward each other.
“Okay, I’ll do it,” Felix whispered with a smirk. Min.A stood up straight, shooting a triumphant smile and a thumbs-up to the crowd as Felix got up from his stool, prompting a massive wave of cheers from the fans in the audience.
He made his way over to the middle of the stage, walking out from behind Y/N and towards the empty chair across the table.
Y/N looked up when she saw someone in her peripheral vision and froze. When Felix gestured for her to take her headphones off, she slowly pulled them down around her neck.
“What are you doing here?” she questioned immediately, her voice filtering into the microphone. Her tone was sharp and instantly accusatory, which sent a laughter through both the crowd and the idols watching from behind.
“Phone a friend,” was his simple, calm answer.
Y/N turned her head, spotting Min.A sitting back on her stool and waving at her with a cheekily innocent expression.
Y/N’s eyes narrowed into a glare before she looked back at Felix, who was currently busy fiddling with the microphone he had just placed down into the desktop stand.
“Okay.. You’re not gonna get me..” Y/N mumbled, crossing her arms defensively.
“Sure, sure,” Felix dragged out his words smoothly.
There was a faint mechanical click, audible only to the two of them sitting at the table, and Y/N’s eyes instantly darted down to where his fingers were hovering over buttons on the microphone.
“Why’d you turn your mic off?” she asked sharply, a sudden spike of nervousness bleeding into her voice.
Felix didn’t offer a response, only shrugging his shoulders as he reached out and tilted the mic completely away from his face too—just for safe measure.
Y/N let out a heavy sigh, looking toward the MC.
“This isn’t fair, can I veto this whole thing?” she whined, prompting another round of laughter from the crowd, and a quiet chuckle from Felix. “I don’t wanna play anymore.”
Behind them, Min.a only spun her pointer finger in the air, silently telling Y/N to turn back around and face her opponent. Y/N didn’t hesitate to shoot her one last glare but did as she was told, settling back into her seat.
“START!” The MC calls out, and the 5 minute timer begins.
“What do you want,” she asked gruffly.
Felix leaned forward slowly, resting his elbow firmly on the table. He placed his chin in his palm, making sure his fingers stood perfectly straight up so that they touched the bridge of his nose—effectively covering his mouth from every camera angle in the stadium.
That was his real goal. Y/N could tell. And it immediately made her more nervous.
Turn off the mic. Turn the mic away. Cover his mouth? Fuck this is not good.
She folded both of her arms over the table so she was in a similar leaning position.
“What are you planning?” she accused in a low voice.
Felix scoffed softly behind his hand. “I’m not planning anything.”
“That phone a friend card isn’t even Min.A’s, she cheated. What are you planning,” Y/N doubled down, her voice coming through the stadium speakers.
The crowd laughed loudly. Being only able to hear Y/N’s side of the conversation was making the entire game much more interesting.
Felix smirked broadly behind his hand, his eyes locking onto hers.
“Remember this morning?” he whispered.
It took less than a single second for her mind to flash back to exactly what he was talking about.
That morning, right before they were supposed to shower and head out for filming, Felix had practically pleaded with her. Telling her how badly he needed her.
And she, as always, had been completely weak to his pleas.
It had quickly led to some breathless, frantic bathroom sex against the counter.
Which was sadly cut short by a loud phone call from Bang Chan asking, 'Where are you guys? You're gonna be late.'
They had been forced to abruptly stop and actually shower after that.
“Yeah..” she murmured, her voice echoing into her mic. She knew she had to be incredibly careful about what she said out loud if this is the route he’s taking to fluster her.
Y/N’s fucked. She knows it. She weak to him. To his voice. His words.
She’s so fucked.
“Sucks we didn’t get to finish,” Felix whispered casually, his eyes dark with mischief. “I didn’t do much besides eat you out.”
“Yeah.. that sucks,” she replied, forcing a perfectly nonchalant tone into the microphone.
“What’s with that tone?” he teased quietly, smirking.
Y/N only shrugged, keeping her face entirely flat.
“I can’t wait till we get home. I already know what i’m gonna do,” he whispered sultrily, the words practically vibrating through her body.
“Oh?” is all she could manage to say aloud. She was backed into a corner. She couldn't say anything descriptive back without exposing them to the entire stadium.
“I’ll eat you out.”
“Again?” she asked.
Felix nodded slowly. “I wanna make you cum. Twice. Maybe three times,” he stated bluntly, his gaze intense.
This is the route he’s going? Oh, Y/N is so so fucked.
“Twice on my tongue, again with my fingers,” he whispered, his voice dropping an octave.
Y/N only blinked, offering a small, casual hum into her microphone as if she was listening intently to some mundane business proposal.
“I’ll make you so wet. Make your pussy drip for me so I can slide my cock in..”
Y/N blinked again, taking a very subtle, very deep breath to keep her heart from exploding like she felt it would.
“Is that what you wanted? Before we got interrupted earlier?” he asked, trying to coax an audible answer out of her, but Y/N refused to give into his bait.
“I would’ve bent you over that bathroom counter. Made you take me before we got in the shower. Then i’d let you suck my dick. Lick my balls how you know I like.”
Y/N felt her breath temporarily hitch in her throat, but she forced her face to stay absolutely straight. Her feet shifted on the stage floor.
“Really?” she mumbled.
“Mhm,” he hummed softly. “Can’t do that now though. I’ll have to fuck you properly in bed instead. Get you on your knees. Have that ass bouncing back on me.”
He paused, letting the imagery settle between them. “Maybe pull your hair how I know you like?” he rasped, his tone lilted with a dangerous edge. “How’s that sound?”
“Good,” was all she offered to the microphone. The only obvious sign of distress being the subtle but heavy way she swallowed.
Felix had to hand it to her, she was incredibly good at keeping a straight face and keeping her voice even.
But he knew her better than anyone else by now. It had been a few years since they started dating, and he could easily tell that he was getting to her.
“Hmm..” He took a short moment to observe her. “How many people do you think know what i’m saying right now? Or at least know that what i’m talking about isn’t.. appropriate,” he asked curiously.
“Everyone,” she muttered blankly into the mic.
“Yeah? Everyone?” he pushed with a small chuckle.
She nodded once.
“You think everyone here knows how much of a slut you are for me? How much you love my voice.. my fingers. My tongue.”
A mechanical whirring sound started near her ears, and the entire crowd in the stadium began screaming and yelling in wild anticipation.
The fluffy white cat ears were moving rapidly.
Y/N knew she was in trouble, but she refused to panic. She could do this. She just had to make them stop moving before the 10 seconds passed.
So she didn’t move a muscle. She couldn’t.
The stadium's jumbotron showed the two of them crystal clear. Her with her arms folded neatly, looking stoic. Felix with his chin resting in his hand, his fingers perfectly covering his lips.
Whatever he was saying remained a total mystery to every single person in the room except for her.
All of the earlier side conversations from the other idols sitting behind them faded into background static.
‘What is Felix saying?’ ‘Will Y/N crack?’ ‘If she doesn’t does that mean she wins?’ ‘The phone a friend veto was mine, we didn’t swap you don’t have proof!’
None of it registered in her brain.
Not even the loud way the MC was currently counting the seconds out loud—because unfortunately for Y/N, the cat ears hadn’t stopped whirring for even half of a second.
Her mind was entirely hyper-focused on two conflicting things: keeping a blank face with even breathing, and the sheer impact of Felix’s sultry voice delivering those dirty words.
His eyes never once left hers, holding her gaze even after the ears began to franticly twist.
“God, I can't wait to get out of here. I’ll fuck you so good, baby, I swear,” Felix practically groaned out in a quiet, rough whisper.
“Have you cumming so much for me. Make you cum all over my dick all night long—“ He paused mid-sentence, his eyes snapping up away from her face.
“10!” the explosive yell of the MC finally snapped Y/N completely out of her trance. “10 SECONDS!”
The mechanical whirring of the ears was instantly drowned out by the deafening yells of the crowd, alongside the loud cheers and laughs from the idols behind them—Min.A loudest of all.
Y/N blinked rapidly, trying to reorient herself. Felix looked back at the idols behind her, then turned his gaze back to her with a small, deeply satisfied smirk playing on his features.
“I’ll do everything I said as soon as we get home. Promise,” was his final rushed whisper before he sat up straight, finally removing his hand from his mouth. A proud, smug smile instantly replaced his hidden smirk.
Y/N was incredibly lucky that her skin was naturally tanned, meaning her blush didn't show as obviously as it would on others. But with how hot she felt—everywhere—she had absolutely no doubt that her face would be tomato red right now if it could be.
She snatched her mic out its stand and whirled around in her chair, looking Min.A dead in the eyes.
“That wasn’t fair!” she whined loudly into her mic. “He’s not even supposed to be playing this round.”
The entire stage erupted into laughter at her protest.
“I won, you lost. Haha!” Min.A teased childishly, sticking her tongue out and making the fans in the crowd laugh again with her.
Y/N only groaned heavily, grabbing her microphone out of the desktop stand. Felix laughed quietly as he followed her up, grabbing his own microphone and turning the power switch back on as he walked back to the line of stools where everyone was sat.
“What did you even say to her?” Han asked curiously, leaning over to Felix the second he took his seat beside him.
Felix only looked at his group member and gave a casual shrug. “Stuff.”
“What stuff?” Jiyeon egged on, leaning forward from her seat on the other side of him to catch the answer.
Felix just shrugged again, remaining tight-lipped, but Jiyeon and Min.A both exchanged a highly amused, sly look with each other. Y/N had meant what she said earlier when Felix asked his question. And Felix fully believed her answer.
She had a very strong feeling that everyone—if not at least 80% of the idols and fans in the stadium—knew the general baseline of what he was saying to get her to crack.
They all knew he was almost certainly dirty talking her to death under his breath. Not to mention the fact that Min.A herself had explicitly told Felix he could be as dirty as he wanted before he walked out there. So that was one person they could count on for a fact.
Both she and Felix had no doubt that the rest of the idols and the some fans knew somethinginappropriate was happening. But as long as they didn’t know the exact, explicit details of what he planned to do to her in their bed tonight, that was all he cared about.
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