⭐ ok new intro post hi i'm chaos :-) we are a system and 2nd (!!!) year medical student in the uk !!
main interests ⭐ theatre (angels in america (!!!!!!!), shakespeare, anything with andrew scott), whitepine, house md, the pitt, embroidery, arcane, d20 and mcyt (i watch tommyinnit, etho and bdubs mostly!)
⭐ if u need anything trigger tagged shoot me an ask and i'll endeavour to do my best with it! i'd rly rly appreciate if mutuals tagged unreality posts :') - also feel free to block [🎬]
links ⭐ ao3 / storygraph / letterboxd
⭐ sideblogs under the cut !!
@chaosstudiesmed - my adventures in medical school :)
@repressionmd - house md + the pitt sideblog!!
@chaos--crafting - mineblr
@augustsattic - writing + poetry blog !!
@whumpawaydarling - whump blog :3 has a different main but it's mine
@athousandwelldisposedhearts - literature blog !
headmate blogs below :) most of these blogs are inactive but if anyone shows up here's quick navigation to their little areas
@quiteafewdragons - my husband tom <3 (he/they/ae)
"bless me anyway. i want more life." and then they do and his pain comes back and he's limping again and his chest is tight and he laughs and cries and leaves heaven and goes home and lives, and hopes, and holds his second chance with both hands and promises us that we have all the power in the world to do the same. oh prior walter i can't believe i didn't know you all this time.
i hope something lesbian happens to all my mutuals soon. if you’re a straight woman or a gay man i hope something lesbian happens to you as well but in a different way
"just looking at you hurts. i'll order up some extra pain meds." "i love you" and that insane half-dismissive gesture wilson does. this happens after house, famously a staunch atheist, electrocutes himself in the hope of a spiritual experience. we never find out what happened, but we know something did, something important, something he wanted to tell the guy who insisted that the space between death was the best feeling ever, and then house says he loves wilson. wilson thinks house is delirious from the morphine, but nothing house says ever sounds that genuine. i love you because i just died and you were standing over my bed and i knew you would be and i love you because you aren't angry at me for almost killing myself again and i love you because you care about me like no one else and i love you because maybe i need to say it in case i don't make it the next time. because there's no sun in the hospital so sunshine on your face won't say it for me. because every inch of my body aches so i can't move to show you. because we've been fooling around with this feeling but i'm never uninhibited enough to say the truth and i want to say it so i'm going to. and maybe we never mention it again. but maybe house entertained a small, tiny possibility that it could change everything.
Is now the right time to confess to all of you that the results tool was created for the mcytblr (minecraft youtuber tumblr) sexyman tournament back in 2023, an event so insane and filled with fraud and contention it has echoed across poll tournaments since, and that was how i knew how to help direct a poll stunt to victory? i am not deep in the dan and phil fandom, but insane poll stunts are of my culture (mcytblr), so i couldn't resist the chance to pass on my knowledge. godspeed, phannies.
like beef comes to chat one day and ethos like drinking a fuckin idk slowness potion and hes like ouhh my head... tbe stress im under rn beef and beefs like oh whats up and ethos like i have this colouring page due.... (dabs at forehead) and beef is like WHAT? And ethos like bdubs gave me this coloiring page to do and i just cant... i just cant beef
i do appreciate that the language barrier between rpf/nsfw bloggers and sfw ones gets wider by one inch per year. this year's inch was changing grian's name to jakey. previous attempts include etho's community-voted pronoun change
knew it was going to happen eventually, but yes we've already had an outlet ask an invasive question about the casts' sexualities... however i am super glad to see the way Jacob Tierney frankly shut down both the question and the premise of the question, protecting Connor and Hudson.
we've got to stop asking this of actors, and embarrassingly this is something i had never considered, but yeah as Jacob puts it asking that when casting is genuinely illegal.
also absolutely hilarious to say "i'm conflicted because its no one's business" and then continue to ask the damn question.
Excerpt from an interview, showing the question posed to actors Connor Storrie and Hudson Williams, and that is answered instead by Jacob Tierney (Heated Rivalry's creator, writer, director and executive producer).
Interviewer: In the vein of your earlier answer, Connor, about the personal bleeding into the professional, there's been an ongoing conversation about queer people playing queer roles. I'm conflicted about this because on the one hand, it's no one's business. On the other hand, this book and this story is, in part, about living authentically and openly. Do you feel there's a need to talk about your personal lives in relation to this project?
Jacob Tierney: I'll answer this for them. I don't think there's any reason to get into that stuff. I'll tell you something about the casting of both of these roles. You can't ask questions like that when you're casting, right? It's actually against the law. So what you have to gauge is somebody's enthusiasm and willingness to do the work. And that's what's so impressive about both of these guys is they came into this being like, "Yeah, we're here to do this, and we are here to make this story feel authentic and to be as real as possible." And they fucking hit it out of the park.
people of the internet are mad that neither hudson nor connor are "out gay men" and are demanding transparency. I have seen this movie before. they do not owe the public anything, ever, and especially not to a world that is so cruel and entitled and invasive. people of the internet are saying they're straight men queerbaiting by playing gay characters: just because they are not out does not mean they are straight — assumptions of straightness as the "norm that is sometimes deviated from" help no one. it also does not mean they need to come out in order to validate & prove their ability to play these roles. just because public opinions on queerness are improved from 2 decades ago doesn't mean it's actually truly safe for every queer person to publicly announce their queerness. the entertainment industry is still discriminatory. individuals are still bigots. policies boast inclusion and protection but rarely actually do enough to fully protect marginalized people from those in power. as Jacob Tierney rightly said, it is illegal to require someone to disclose their sexual identity during the hiring process in any job, and in acting it's no different. they don't owe you their private lives, their sexual preferences, their vulnerability. acting is a job, and theyre doing it well. and maybe they're queer or maybe they're not, but what matters here is that they're taking on these roles with passion and respect.
the idea that only queer people should play queer roles relies on this unrealistic insistence that 1. all queer people have fully come to terms with their own identities and 2. are in safe enough positions to come out and 3. have decided that they are also in the position (financially, physically, socially, etc) to face the inevitable risks and dangers that they will have to face by being an openly queer person in this volatile world
augh … ilya being such an authentic representation of what being from a homophobic country is like … feeling like you’re living on borrowed time … like whatever love you find isn’t yours to keep … emotionally detaching yourself from your romantic relationships because you’re so afraid of it getting ripped away by external forces that are so much bigger than you … oh my ilya
something about emotionally repressed characters having their carefully manufactured facades completely bulldozed by the only people observant enough to see through them. something about characters who have lived their entire lives grinning and bearing it finally meeting someone who lets them be a person outside of that performance. something something something. gurgles and chokes on my own blood