TICKET TO HEAVEN EPISODE 1 – SOME THOUGHTS AND OBSERVATIONS
(above) Ticket to Heaven Ep.1 [1/4] 1.06 – Barth arrives back at St. Magdalene's in 2025
Episode 1 of Ticket to Heaven did not disappoint – the writing was tight, the directing assured, the acting solid, the art design carefully and thoughtfully crafted, the visuals gorgeous and the narrative so densely packed with thematic content there is much to chew on.
This is QL with lofty, coming-of-age cinematic ambitions, pitched for cachet, and reminds me very much of Cinema Paradiso (and closer to home and in this era, also Director Aof's Moonlight Chicken – oh dang that unserious name though! 🤣).
There was, of course, the usual paradox inherent in the early stages of every series that brims with potential – while there's a lot to think about, there are also not many conclusions or fully-defined directions that can be confirmed at this stage. But doubtless this will change as more revelations come to light.
Anyway, on a general level TTH seems to be opting for a more conciliatory, softer bearing with regard to its discourse on the Catholic church's stance with regard to LGBTQ+ rights – no brimstone-breathing, Bible-thumping villains seem set to appear on the horizons for this. We're getting instead the calm, supportive and gentle presence of Father Anont fronting the Catholic side of things, firm yet fair, whether in 1996 or closer to the present. Indeed, because Director Aof had actual church representatives providing consulting advice to the series, we know that TTH could never have been touted as a vehicle to vilify and demonize – I would be very surprised if they were to take that route.
Production seems to be adopting a much more measured, level-headed and (dare I say it) compassionate approach in putting together this work, which nonetheless must inevitably call for some re-examination of the way certain church teachings are put into practice...
Which is not to say they're going to be fragile or diffident about it. We get this at the very beginning, with a citation from Leviticus:
TTH is gently but firmly pointing out that while many aspects of the LGBTQ+ experience may be alien to the church, according to the Bible itself queer members should not be ostracized but welcomed instead – very purposefully calling out all Christian queerphobes right from the first few frames of the show.
(A note on this verse… Leviticus is the third book of the Bible, and it lists detailed life precepts and principles for the Jewish people who had left slavery behind in Egypt in search of freedom and a new life in the Promised Land of Israel. Some of the laws therein may seem restrictive and harsh by today's standards, even within the context of the church conservative, but set surprisingly among the strict and exacting rules of this ancient book is the rejoinder to welcome—and love—the foreigner, the stranger, the other-worldly. The words "Love them as yourself" also call to mind the words of Christ Himself, in what is known as The Golden Rule, from the Sermon on the Plain – " Do to others as you would have them do to you" – Luke 6:31. Strong words indeed.)
And while 1996 Barth is full of anger toward God and the church, we are also shown right at the start of Ticket to Heaven that 21st century Barth is very much more softened in his ways… He's traveled back to witness the ordination of someone important to him, and unless he's there to disrupt the proceedings (I don't think so), this is also Barth accepting that a loved one is crossing over from common laity deep into the very world that held so much anguish for him in the past.
This stands in stark contrast to the mini-drama of Ep.1 [2/4] 6.08, when the exact opposite happened: when Barth refused to dress up and sit down to honor Deacon Valentino at his ordination ceremony, choosing to storm off in protest instead. (In order to be ordained as a priest, one must first be made a deacon, for those wondering why Deacon Valentino is so titled.)
(above) Ticket to Heaven Ep.1 [2/4] 6.28 – Barth rebelliously turns his back and walks out of Deacon Valentino's ordination into the priesthood
Anyway, in the 21st century we see Barth being polite, conciliatory and even solicitous with kindly Father Anont (he actually invites Father to sit with him to await the arrival of the ordinand being consecrated). It does seem like 2020s Barth has left his rage-filled rebel past behind him – and the crucifix/cross dangling conspicuously from the rear-view mirror of his flashy car (a Mazda RX-7?) serves as a prominent reminder, if not of deeply-renewed devotion, at least of recognition that the Christian faith still continues to have a place in his life.
(above) Ticket to Heaven Ep.1 [1/4] 1.37 – Barth leans on his car with the crucifix/cross dangling from the rear-view mirror
A note on the time periods while we're at it – Father Anont's comment about it being almost 20 years since they last met doesn't quite seem to add up at first calculation, if the radio announcer's expository news bulletin during Barth's car journey back to St. Magdalene's is anything to go by.
(above) Ticket to Heaven Ep.1 [1/4] 4.34 – Father Anont says to Barth "Hard to believe it's been almost 20 years."
The radio soundbite dates the scene to 22 January 2025, when Thailand's marriage equality came into effect – and that's almost thirty years after Barth and Tanrak's time in high school together. In Ep.1 we're told that 1996 was their Year 12—which is the final year of high school in Thailand—and that means that Barth has another decade or so before disappearing from Father Anont's sights.
Took me a bit of mental gymnastics, but noting that this is just Episode 1, I think we should get to see (in the later eps) some of Barth and/or Tanrak doing time in the seminary as well, on the journey toward priesthood after high school. From what I gather, the time period between high school and ordination as a priest can take eight to ten years of seminary studies, which fits in pretty well with the overall timeframe (if the end of their seminary decade is also the last time Barth sees Father Anont before their 20-year break) – high school in 1996, plus 10 years in the seminary, plus 19 years of not seeing Father Anont, and boom! We're in 2025. 🥰👍
We may not get to see all of this unfurl onscreen (the high school girls from the trailer still need to tell their part of Barth and Tanrak's story, which means that this one final high school term should still be stretched out for further airtime) but a seminary decade would fill out the time gap pretty well. I guess we'll find out in due course.
So on we go to meta – and there are quite a few metaphors in Ep.1 that are impossible to ignore.
HOPE FOR THE FALLEN The first metaphor comes right near the beginning, and seems intended to be a prologue or summary of sorts (Director Aof also did this with Bad Buddy – see this link here ).
(above) Ticket to Heaven Ep.1 [1/4] 6.28 – Barth and Tanrak hold up the falling cross
That visual metaphor of the falling sculpture is rather heavy-handed, but also most apt – Barth and Tanrak struggling under the weight of the cross as it bears down upon them is a potent visual stand-in for the two of them also struggling metaphorically under the weight of all that the cross represents. And yet the boys are not there to damage or destroy, but to support and prop things back up again. That it is Father Anont who sends for rope and has the boys tie the cross back suggests that TTH is also calling for restraint on the part of the church as well, and that it is a call that comes from higher-ups within the church too (that's just speculation on my part though).
WATER, WATER EVERYWHERE I mentioned in my write-up of the trailer that Ticket to Heaven appeared to be using water as a metaphor for new life and new beginnings (tapping on its significance during the ritual of baptism). There are several examples alluding to this, and to the metaphorical meanings of water, in Episode 1:
Our first glimpse of Tanrak is during a rainstorm, which seems a baptism of sorts. And Barth's first appearance at St. Magdalene's, a new beginning for him as well, also happens while the rain is still pelting down from the heavens outside. Oddly Tanrak is wet from the rain but Barth is not – I'm thinking that maybe this underscores how Tanrak is open to messages from God above, while Barth is impervious to them? Still room for interpretation…🤔
(above) Ticket to Heaven Ep.1 [1/4] 5.03 – Tanrak arrives at church in the flurry of a cloudburst
Then at the communal baths, we see much splashing around among the boys (some of it unwanted, especially by poor Prince) – but Barth is spared any such baptismal initiation, seeing the coarse-mouthed Kongkit off and remaining as dry as when he walked in.
(above) Ticket to Heaven Ep.1 [1/4] 10.34 – Prince gets doused in what looks like a mock-baptism at the baths, in stark contrast to Barth later
However, without the means to retrieve water from the communal cistern, Barth is unable to cleanse himself properly (just as he struggles to begin a new life within the coddling constraints of Magdalene Hall) – it's Tanrak who comes to Barth's rescue, leaving him his basin and soap that he might rinse himself anew again (and so it must be Tanrak who will be Barth's initiation into a new life, I suppose, with Barth being unable to do so on his own).
(above) Ticket to Heaven Ep.1 [1/4] 11.41 – Barth alone and struggling at the communal baths
Then there's Barth hosing himself down after basketball – it's obvious something's not right (from Tanrak's worried checking out if anyone's watching; maybe he just doesn't want to get caught spying) but I don't quite know what the scene is trying to say metaphorically; more to come in later eps, perhaps. For the moment I'm reading it as Barth doing his own thing, despite rules to the contrary (there are probably rules against using the hose water that way), which is a metaphor for Barth trying on his own to find a new beginning and a new life somehow, but not quite knowing what to do or how to get there, and infringing all sorts of norms in the process.
(above) Ticket to Heaven Ep.1 [3/4] 7.32 – Tanrak spies on Barth hosing himself down
Barth and Tanrak trapped in that dark and empty swimming/diving pool is notable for the stark absence of water – if anything, that large, dirty and empty tank looks like the exact opposite of a baptismal font, that is full of pure, holy water and used in the sacrament of baptism that initiates a Christian follower into new life.
(above) Ticket to Heaven Ep.1 [4/4] 8.01 – Barth and Tanrak in the empty pool
So it looks as though Barth and Tanrak are being depicted in a state of unhallowed limbo here, as though prevented from going on to the next, true stage of their lives. And if water is symbolic of life (typical for religions that emerged from desert cultures, including Christianity) that empty pool also stands as a visual metaphor for their lives too, with both missing something vital and valid at their cores (for Barth it's a replacement for his Catholic faith, for Tanrak it's the absence of family I think). And when Barth rejects Tanrak's offer of help to retrieve his belongings from the dirty puddle within the emptied pool, of course Tanrak just rolls up his (pajama bottom) sleeves and gets stuck in alongside despite the opposition. No surprise either that they get found out, after their illicit night out together. Metaphorical foreshadowing for their situation and relationship, methinks. 🥰
THE UNHOLY SERPENT WOULD SHED HIS OUTER MANTLE… BUT WHAT SHOULD TAKE ITS PLACE? I already wrote about the significance of Barth's name in my write-up on the trailer (Bartholomew, the saint whom Barth is named after, is famous for the flaying and loss of his skin). And just as the serpent (that is reviled in the Bible) sheds its skin in a process of growth and renewal, so too Barth the tainted outcast is seeking to tear off the trappings of his old, Catholic life, while still searching for an authentic identity that he can assume instead, and in so doing become his authentic queer self. Episode 1 showed us several metaphors related to this:
Barth basically refuses to wear Tanrak's uniform, rejecting it in favor of his own t-shirt and pants combo to wear to Deacon Valentino's ordination. On one level this is Barth rejecting the uniformity expected of all the boys at Magdalene Hall, but on another level this is also Barth rejecting the notion that he should put on something that was tailored for others, and not specifically to his needs – metaphorically, this applies to the Catholic (and by extension cishet-normative) strictures and controls placed upon on his LGBTQ+ self too.
(above) Ticket to Heaven Ep.1 [2/4] 6.08 – Barth remains standing impudently during Deacon Valentino's ordination ceremony
This emphasis on his individuality with its own specific needs is underscored by the messaging on that t-shirt as well – Property of Jewel, I think it says. One reading is that Property highlights the truism that the boys seem to be treated more like chattel than persons in their own right (with curtails on basic individual freedoms, e.g., curfews for bedtime, communal dorms and baths, no secured lockers for personal belongings, indeed very little personal privacy anywhere, at all). I'm not fully convinced this is the only significance though... Now Barth's formal name is revealed to us as Bodin (บดินทร์, visible on his monogrammed school uniform during the flashback with the bully at his previous school), and the word means king, overlord or sovereign. I think Director Aof (whom we know is heavily into art direction when it applies to wardrobe) is signaling also that Barth considers himself the property of no one but his own sovereign self (with the word Jewel standing in for the crown of King Barth alone, answerable to no other mortal).
(above) Ticket to Heaven Ep.1 [2/4] 4.43 – a close-up of Barth in his "Property of Jewel" t-shirt
Another example of Barth refusing to put on the coverings of the church is when he rejects Tanrak's offer to get him a blanket, saying he'll handle things himself. But then Master Phak hands him one, which Barth has no choice but to accept – and yet, we see that Barth refuses to cover himself with that blanket either, which is another metaphorical example of our flayed Bartholomew needing a new covering, but insistent on deciding for himself exactly what new mantle will be appropriate (not just any old covering thrust open him by others purporting to know better, or who are simply following the rules).
(above) Ticket to Heaven Ep.1 [1/4] 17.59 – Barth steadfastly refuses to cover himself with the blanket issued to him
We do see Barth wearing the standard issue Magdalene pajamas, but we also see him fidgeting with the buttons in the middle of the night, as though keen to peel that uniform off his person too. I suppose he's prevented from doing so due to reasons of decorum, or maybe because it would be cold without? Not too cold for him and Tanrak to be spending a night out in an abandoned, unsheltered pool though. 🤣 And when he douses himself with that garden hose, does that mean the times are warm during the day, or that he himself is fevered? 🤷♂️ Maybe this will be explained in coming episodes.
(above) Ticket to Heaven Ep.1 [1/4] 17.53 – Barth toys with his pajama buttons
With regard to art direction, I do think the show has executed some delectable little flourishes for us to savor (they're in the intro and outro though, not specific to Episode 1).
That shot of the Bible in the outro shows it open to First Corinthians Chapter 13, which is noteworthy because it is the biblical chapter that deals with the nature of love, and which is often quoted. Indeed the trailer for TTH actually opens with Tanrak quoting from the opening lines of this chapter: "If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal" (1 Corinthians 13:1). This is Ticket to Heaven once again reminding all persons on the Christian side of things to remember that feedback should be given with love at its heart, or else it is just disruptive noise.
(above) Screenshot from the outro, showing a Bible open to First Corinthians Chapter 13 – pointedly, there is also a note of gratitude that reads "Special thanks to Fathers and all special advisors"
I do rather love the shot of Barth and Tanrak on that double-decker bed, because it encapsulates their situation and their dilemma so succinctly and beautifully (cinematographically speaking).
(above) Screenshot from the intro, showing Barth and Tanrak hemmed in by the double-decker bed while moonlight pours in from an open window behind them
Knowing how our boys are held captive by their circumstances, and must live their true lives in the shadows – the bars and supports of the bedframe look so much like an imprisoning cage, and yet to the left, the moonlight streaming in the window beckons enticingly, heralding a world beyond that is as yet out of reach. It will be some time before Barth and Tanrak can stand in the light of their own truths, and it is not yet time for that in this scene.
Oh but the one visual that truly stands out for both aesthetic and metaphorical beauty is that shot of Barth and Tanrak in the shadows, on either side of a grille (and it's not just because we can see that Gemini and Fourth have obviously been working out for this series 🤣).
(above) Screenshot from the intro, showing Barth and Tanrak, bodies bare, separated by a grille
The immediate, symbolic read is that Barth and Tanrak are separated by barriers that they will have to break through, and this is a common enough visual metaphor used to highlight relationship conflicts and/or separation.
But given the shadowy lighting and the fine spacing of the wires, my mind cannot help but immediately see this is as a callout also to the Catholic confessional and the Sacrament of Penance. During one form of this sacrament, a believer on one side of a screen (within a private booth) confesses their sins to a priest on the other side, who then goes on to absolve the penitent of their wrongdoing after providing counsel and assigning some form of penance.
And with Barth looking up expectantly while Tanrak telegraphs hesitancy, all downcast and with his back turned, this absolutely calls to mind the awkward baring of truths from one party to another. That the pair are also bare-bodied further reminds us of the revelatory, vulnerable setting of the confessional – I hope that this scene in the series will be one in which they reveal secrets and truths to each other because it would work so well with the visual messaging. 👍
So to round things off – a few hopes and wishes on my part:
They started off Episode 1 trying to get us to believe that Barth is back at St. Magdalene's for the ordination to priesthood of "someone important" to him. I know this is meant to make us think that it's Tanrak's ordination, and that he's taking the final step to sever romantic ties with Barth (priests must lead a life of strict celibacy after all) – but I refuse to believe it. 🤣 I do think this is Director Aof attempting to bamboozle us again (like he did with the trailer at the end of Bad Buddy Episode 11). Breaking up Barth and Tanrak would require us to believe that the higher-ups in GMMTV have consented to the breakup of the branded GeminiFourth coupling for this series, and I just can't see that happening. The more likely scenario, in my opinion, is that Barth is back to witness the ordination of Master Phak or Kongdech (or someone else from the series perhaps). Still, you never know... Director Aof is known for ending his series on a bittersweet note – see He's Coming to Me and Bad Buddy for some examples. These two series ended on a note that was not romcom-saccharine, happily or fluffily ever after, but grounded in sobering reality even while their protagonists still managed to end up together. (The one exception is Last Twilight, and my takeaway from that series was that Director Aof had been coerced into tacking on a cop-out ending.) It may yet be possible that Tanrak will not end up Barth's life partner at the end of Ticket to Heaven, but we'll see.
What I do think is more likely is that TTH will end with the announcement of Barth's engagement to his true love (Tanrak or someone else), now that he's made peace with God in 2025 and Thailand has legalized same-sex marriage. I was looking out for it, but production seems to have taken great pains to hide 2020s Barth's left hand and ring finger, so any engagement ring was kept well away from view in Episode 1. 👀
(above) Ticket to Heaven Ep.1 [1/4] 1.34 – Barth in 2025, with his left hand hidden by his car's side-view mirror like it's Austin Powers crockery or BillyBabe's love scene lamp in The Sign 🤣
I think it would be lovely if we found out in the final episode that Barth and Tanrak were planning their marriage – that would bookend the series nicely, after it opened with the radio announcement of marriage equality in January 2025.
And that's my read of Ticket to Heaven Episode 1. Looking forward to Episode 2!
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